A/N: This chap is a little more PG-13.
*I own nothing. No copyright infringement intended.
…
She came to him beneath the shaded trees they'd played under since there were children. He tried to ignore how her dress was a little nicer, her hands a little softer, her hair not partially stuck to her face. He knew there was a reason behind it, but he was very good at ignoring what he didn't particularly like, so he focused instead on her eyes that never changed, that were always crystalline and beautiful. Eyes that adored him.
She smiled when he reached for her, smiled so wide she almost laughed. Her eyes sparkled and dimples reached into the sides of her cheeks. And then he kissed her and she lost herself in that kiss, in the feel of his hand around the back of her neck and his fingers slipping into her honey tresses.
"I missed you," she murmured, still smiling. She felt him smile against her too and it made her smile more.
"I just saw you this morning," he said, kissing her neck, and then nuzzling her.
She felt chills race down her spine and pulled him closer to her, her arms around his neck, as he lay cradled against the base of a tree.
"Too long ago," she gasped.
His lips and then his tongue and then his teeth made a trail along the collarbone he was slowly uncovering.
"Ryder." Her nails dug into his neck.
He felt her shiver and took glorious pleasure in it.
"What excuse did you give?" he asked, moving to her opposite shoulder and unraveling the button down blouse that now hung loosely around her frame.
"Hmm?" she murmured, half gone already with his ministrations.
"I said…" He let his hand drift down her side until it squeezed her hip gently. "What excuse did you give?" he whispered in her ear, his teeth lightly scraping the outer shell.
"I…I…"
He stopped, pulled back and looked at her. Finally she opened her eyes when she realized he wouldn't go further without an answer.
"Yes?" he prompted.
"I…" Her brows furrowed. "Does it matter?"
And then suddenly it did matter. Not because he particularly cared what the excuse she'd given was, but because of how she asked and how he couldn't tell if it was defensive because she didn't want to tell him or because she was so aroused by him she couldn't remember.
So, he said nothing and he knew she could tell he needed to know because he didn't start kissing her again, didn't start doing anything again. That was also how she knew he wasn't angry enough that he wanted her to leave. He never wanted her to leave. That's what made it hurt so much.
"Ryder," she said softly, and she avoided his eyes.
He didn't want to know now. He knew for sure he didn't want to know. And he knew that she knew that because she knew him so well. She knew that if he didn't like something, he ignored it until it was absolutely impossible to avoid dealing with it any longer. And there must still be time left if she wasn't outright telling him, because he knew she would if there wasn't any.
Because she knew him.
"Does it have to do with my father?"
He swallowed hard and then he couldn't look at her. Several moments passed and he seriously considered releasing her. But then he thought of his empty bed sheets and no one to talk to except his mother, and no one who would take him seriously, and how alone he always felt when she wasn't right there next to him.
"You don't…" she began cautiously.
"You're right," he said, "I don't."
Then he gently pushed her off his lap and let her go, all except for one hand. Her frown of disappointment turned into furrowed brows of confusion when he pulled her to her feet. Her eyes questioned him, queried his name in silence.
"I don't want to know," he said. "You're a terrible liar," he managed to laugh a little. "And I don't want to know the truth."
"The truth isn't so bad…" she said, drawing lines along his jaw with her finger. "It's probably worse in your mind."
"Maybe," he allowed. "But all I care about right now is that you're here with me."
"I am, Ryder. I'm here."
With her eyes glued to him like they were, he knew she was speaking the truth. It didn't matter that the excuse she'd used might be awful or might not be so bad, that the insinuation were worse than the reality, which was likely the case.
It didn't matter that they should be allowed to be together openly, but because Quinn had given Jade strict instructions not to be with his son, they technically couldn't be seen together except in the most unavoidable capacity.
It didn't matter that it was getting harder to ignore the way Ryder's father looked at Jade, even though Beatrice had only been gone for six months, and Lydia was more on edge than ever.
None of that mattered.
What mattered was that they were together, and whatever hindered them being so was out of sight.
So, he pulled her along to a tree further back on the property and turned her so she was pushed against the back of the tree and he kissed her until she could no longer think clearly, let alone remember the excuse she'd used to get away from the house or make one up.
Because the truth was she'd made no excuse. She'd fulfilled all her duties for the day and she'd discreetly left the house. When another cog approached her, she said she was going out to fetch apples for the baron and baroness. There was a knowing look in the girl's eyes, but she never said a word to contradict her. She even turned the other way when Jade went to continue out the door.
Both of those things Jade knew would upset Ryder. Both caused suspicion. Both were risky. And at least one of them indicated that someone might find them.
It was nothing revolting or offensive like Ryder was probably thinking, and so she thought it best to distract him. It might eat at him later that night when he was trying to sleep and unable to, just as would be the case with her, but in this moment the feel of his lips, the touch of his hands, the sweet murmurs in her ear were her undoing. When she pushed herself up against him, let him feel her curves and her scent and her need, she knew the effect was mutual and always had been.
"Ryder-Ryder," she finally pulled away. She cupped his face but kept it at a short distance, forcing him to look at her, to listen to something other than her gasps and moans of pleasure.
He blinked.
"What?" he asked, and then a perverse smirk formed on his features. "Did you want to…"
In other circumstances she would've playfully slapped him, but in her current position the best she could manage was rolling her eyes, which ended in a coy smile on her face. An agreement. A yes. Because of course she wanted to. She always wanted to. And he loved that about her.
Her sigh told him not yet though, so he tried unsuccessfully to wipe the dirty smirk off his face.
"Then what?"
When she looked up at him, playfulness replacing the smile, she was glad that his expression didn't immediately turn to panic.
"I need you to know that I love you, Ryder."
His face paled and he swallowed. He was clearly starting to fear the worst, the end of them, but there was also love and insurmountable amount of affection in his eyes that warmed her insides.
"No matter what happens." Her fingers clutched the collar of his shirt. "I will always love you. I will always want you. Nothing can change that."
She saw the fear in his eyes very clearly now, the do you know something terrible you're not telling me, the is the worst case scenario in my mind actually a reality now? But she confirmed nothing, because even she didn't have a solid answer. Just intuition. Terrible intuition she worried predicted the future.
Ryder didn't ask any of the things his eyes were begging to have answered, as she knew he wouldn't.
Instead, he kissed her, kissed her lips and cheek and along her jaw line. And he whispered into her ear sweet nothings she would always cling to even in the coming days and years ahead.
When he pulled back there was a sad smile on his face.
"My mother has never stopped loving my father," he said, "And while I know he still cares for her, it's not as it used to be." He avoided her gaze for a moment, and she knew why. "I don't think it ever will be again." He sighed, and then leaned into her hand when she held it against his cheek.
"Ryder…" she beckoned softly.
He turned to her, drawn as always by the sweet melody of her voice.
"I want to be a Baron someday," he told her. "My father doesn't think I can do it, but I know I can." He paused, his gaze growing more intense, driving into hers, and she let herself drown in it. "I can promise you though that is the only thing we will have in common, because I will love you forever and I will never want another. As long as you're mine, I am yours."
Tears in her eyes, she nodded, and whispered, "I'm yours, Ryder. I'm yours."
And then they lost themselves to each other, kissing fiercely against the back of that tree trunk. When the sun began to set, Ryder lowered Jade to the ground and made love to her amidst the shaded trees.