Mars: Jeez, do I feel bad.
Raiden: For making a Mary Sue story?
Mars: Shh! Snake STILL doesn't know about that! But no, this chapter was finished back in 2009.
Raiden: And here we are, three years later.
Mars: It's more like two considering it was December of 09.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Metal Gear series or its characters, but the copyright on "A Christmas Carol" expired LONG ago…

Revolver Ocelot looked over his costume. He had shackles on his wrists and ankles that were attacked to a prop bag made out of paper maché. Snake walked over to him with a bag of flour in his hands. "What are you doing with that?" he asked.

"I need to dump this over your head to make you look like a ghost," Snake explained causally.

"What! I thought we agreed that we would use a projector…"

"It's not working."

"Then why don't you get Dr. Emmerich to…"

"He's still not here."

"I thought he came in when the play started."

"He didn't we had to replace him with Akiba."

"You mean Sasaki?" Ocelot laughed.

"Anyway, I still need to dump this bag of flour over your head."

"Do you really have to!"

"It's either that or I kill you and you come back as a ghost," Snake took out his Socom and aimed it at Ocelot. "What's it gonna be?"

"You try and fix that projector or I shoot you myself!"

"A Metal Gear Christmas Carol"
Chapter 2: Jacob Ocelot

"Snake went about his usual way home," the Narrator explained. "He ate his dinner in the tavern, where people were celebrating while he sat alone in the corner. Then he walked home in the cold alone."

Snake walked up to his door and looked closely at the doorknocker. "What the…?" he mumbled, "Bah, it must be my imagination." He walked inside and went into his room to get into his night clothes. He came out took out a cigar and smoked it in front of the fireplace. He looked up at the painting of a younger version of himself and a beautiful young woman. Suddenly, a face appeared in the painting. "What the hell?" He rubbed his eyes, "That tavern might have sold me bad food, I'll shut them down if I…"

"Eeeeebeneeeezer Snaaaaaakeee…" a ghostly voice wailed.

"Who's there?"

"Iiiiiiii am a spiiiiiiiirrrrrit forced to waaaaaaaaaaalk the earth…"

"Who are you? Show yourself!"

A transparent image of an old man in chains came down from the painting in the fireplace. He was holding a huge bag that the chains were connected to in his left hand and was spinner a revolver in his right. "I am Jacob…" he stopped spinning and wailing, "Ocelot." (Revolver Ocelot)

"Ocelot?" Snake gasped in disbelief, "No, you've been dead for seven years!"

"What a long seven years it has been…" Ocelot said mournfully, "I have been cursed, by my greed and selfishness, to walk the earth for all eternity…"

"Then why are you here?"

"If you continue the current lifestyle you have been living, you shall share the same fate as me. You will be visited by three ghosts tonight, starting at the stroke of midnight…"

"Ghosts? Bah, humbug, I don't believe in ghosts."

"THEN HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN MY PRESENSE SNAKE?" he shouted. Snake was taken aback by this and became silent. "You will be visited by three ghosts, they will show you your past, present and future…" He began to leave but he was weighed down by the bag, he sighed a heavy sigh, "Ah, my fate is truly a terrible one…and this weight is a constant reminder…" he picked the bag up. "Do not envy my fate Ebenezer…" and he left.

"The visit by his old partner had shaken Snake. He silently convinced himself that it was all a hallucination brought on by food poisoning. So he went to bed, forgetting the ordeal."

"How did you get the projector working anyway?" Mei Ling asked Snake.

"I threw it across the room," he casually answered.

"And that worked?"

"All I know is that it started working when I plugged it back in again."

"Alright, anyway, it's time for you to get into costume…"

A yell from a female was heard, the two of them went to check it out. They saw Olga Gurlukavich at the bottom of the stairs to be basement, on the ground, holding her ankle. "Olga! Are you okay?" Snake shouted down to her.

"No! I think I hurt my ankle!" she yelled up at him.

Snake quickly walked down the stairs to help her, when he slipped. He quickly grabbed onto the railing to avoid falling further. "Why the hell are the stairs wet?" he turned to Mei Ling, "Get the janitor! And get a doctor!" Mei Ling ran to get them, leaving Snake to wonder, who's going to fill in for Olga now?

Mars: -plays dramatic music-
Raiden: That was kinda short...
Mars: Shut up!