The Buzz On How Maggie Got Inside Her Psychiatrist's Head

by xandermartin98

In a sort of between-events sequel to previous Rocko/Maggie crossover fanfic "The Buzz On How Maggie Got Fondled By Flecko" that is SO ridiculously offensive and generally dark/cynical that it actually makes the original story look like freaking BARNEY AND FRIENDS by comparison, Maggie Pesky, after being declared legally insane, is sent to an asylum, in which hilarity ensues.

2. Chapter 2

THE BUZZ ON HOW MAGGIE GOT INSIDE HER PSYCHIATRIST'S HEAD, CHAPTER 2

One immensely fateful evening roughly five days later (yes, believe it or not, Maggie actually HAD, in fact, been injured THAT egregiously by Filburt's...AHEM...rather heavily abusive physical treatment of her), Dr. Hutchison drove her way back over to the local O-Town Hospital in her fancy snow-white Cadillac, took the main elevator straight up to the building's aforementioned fifth floor and smugly waltzed right back into her designated operating room, where Maggie, now fully recovered and ready to go, was "eagerly" waiting for her on one of the waiting chairs.

"SO, my beloved little SWEETUMS, ready to head on back to the asylum where you BELONG?" Hutchison cynically explained, with her usual cloyingly happy tone gradually fading from her voice with each individual word of the question as she imperiously crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Maggie with a look of both immense disapproval and equally immense disappointment while Maggie just rolled her eyes and irritatedly threw her arms out beside her in response.

"Oh, COME ON, you KNOW for a FACT that Filburt deserves to be locked up there WAY more than I do at ANY rate! Hell, to be quite frank with you, even YOU kind of do!" Maggie flew straight up to Hutchison's face, looked directly into her eyes and angrily pointed out with tightly clenched fists while Hutchison just nervously, worriedly backed away and did the "jazz hand(s)" maneuver in response.

"HMPH!" Hutchison sneered, grabbing Maggie assertively by the waist and angrily but gently setting her back down onto the ground in desperate hopes that maybe, just MAYBE, it would perhaps help the often-insufferably arrogant and self-obsessed little drama queen finally learn her place for once.

"That may be SO," Hutchison continued, planting her hand(s) matter-of-factly onto her hips and aggravatedly sighing in response to Maggie's exhaustingly unrelenting impertinence that her amazingly cute and huggable outward appearance ever-so-predictably concealed, "but that still doesn't give you any right to be part of the catalyst behind the event that DAMNED nearly ended up being the straw that broke the camel's back regarding my already rather exceptionally abusive marriage with Filburt, KAY?!" Hutchison calmly (albeit unbelievably patronizingly) squatted down onto her right knee, gently wrapped her left arm around Maggie's collarbone area and explained to her...then suddenly shrieked the last word of her sentence at the tops of her lungs (punctuating it with a horrifically sharp bend of her neck in the process, naturally), wrapped both of her arms forcefully around Maggie's neck and began violently strangling her.

"Someone WILL pay for this unspeakable insolence...oh yes, SOMEONE...WILL...PAY!" Maggie indignantly (not to mention selfishly) thought to herself as she began flailing her spindly little sextuple limbs all over the place like a deranged rag doll while also gagging, coughing and sputtering desperately for air, already beginning to develop rather extreme feelings of purple-faced deja vu as Hutchison tightly pressed the back of her poor little insect noggin against her deliciously bulbous, brightly colored feline breasts (well, the part of her dress that just so happened to be rather skimpily "concealing" them, at least).

A few minutes later, Maggie (who was now back in her straitjacket, thank GOD) and Hutchison (who, unfortunately, was still burdened with having to drag Flecko's dead body behind her on an astonishingly crude makeshift rope leash) finally arrived back at the O-Town Asylum, where they quickly found out upon entering the main lobby (entrance hallway) and stepping up to its registration desk that Chuck and Leon Chameleon (also known professionally as the Chameleon Brothers and non-professionally as The Most Definitely Gay Duo) now served as the building's collective secretary. Just to make matters even worse, they also were now wearing comically oversized sombreros and blatantly fake mustaches in order to visually compliment their gratingly stereotypical voices and mannerisms; apart from that, however, they were still definitely every bit as buck-naked as ever, complete with basically everything that said characteristic implied about them.

"Hey, guys..." Hutchison dejectedly shrugged her shoulders and sighed upon seeing who the new caretakers for the asylum's registration gate were.

"How are things?" she reluctantly asked Chuck and Leon, extending the palm of her (left) hand out toward them so as to indicate that it was now their turn to speak. A LOT.

"OH, SWEET NAKED ANTONIO BANDERAS ON A HOT SUMMER BEACH, THEY ARE JUST ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY, COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY FABULOUS!" Chuck ecstatically jumped for joy and began yelling in only THE most obnoxiously high-pitched and painstakingly thick-accented of voices while Leon cupped his chin in his left hand and sassily glared at Chuck.

"OH, YAHH...I mean, honestly, what can I say? As of late, it just so happens that literally EVERYONE in town is becoming simply NOTHING short of CUCKOO CRAZY!" Leon annoyingly-theatrically crooned and laughed at Maggie's expense. "CUCKOO! CUCKOO! CUCKOO!" he began crossing his eyes, sticking out his tongue and yelling like an idiot while making the classic "peek-a-boo" gesture with his hands, causing both Brothers to clutch their chests and uproariously LAUGH like COMPLETE idiots while Maggie and Hutchison VERY unamusedly rolled their eyes and sardonically gave each other the classic "well, I suppose we really aren't so different from each other after all, but then again, neither are they from us" look, with Hutchison crossing her arms over her chest and impatiently tapping her foot in annoyance in the process while Maggie was (un)fortunately only able to do the latter of those two things.

"AWW, what's the MATTER?" Chuck teasingly and ever-so-flamboyantly asked Maggie and Hutchison, trope-tastically twirling his fake mustache with his right hand while lovingly caressing Leon's firmly erect, fully exposed penis with his left (needless to say, this caused Leon to warmly blush and begin orgasmically moaning, panting and crooning in response). Surprisingly, out of respect for what Maggie had been through with Flecko back when he was still alive, Hutchison actually DIDN'T attempt to shield Maggie's eyes from the occurrence; you'd better believe that the indescribably confused and disgusted looks on Maggie's and Hutchison's faces were absolutely PRICELESS, however.

"Do you feel that perhaps we would be more suited as pitiful, lowly minimum-wage CONSTRUCTION workers, maybe?" Chuck provocatively continued asking Maggie and Hutchison while Leon hornily murmured "you can erect MY Chokey Chicken ANY day of the week, brother" underneath his warmly panting breath, droolingly grinning from ear to ear, effeminately placing the back of his right hand over his hot, sweaty forehead and gleefully, backwardly swooning head-over-heels onto the floor with a great big butthole-penetrating THUD in the process as Chuck embarrassedly giggled at poor Leon's expense and extended out his left hand (which was now dripping with Leon's semen, naturally) to Maggie so that she could lick it clean while Hutchison briefly lifted her up off of the floor so that she would be able to properly reach the extremity in question without Chuck having to move all the way around the desk or witness her astonishingly grotesque mouth-extending trick.

"(AHEM) Um...n-no, actually...more accurately FASHION designers, if you catch my drift!" Hutchison explained to Chuck, who mainly just boredly yawned in response with his right hand while Maggie diligently and systematically (albeit rather sluttishly, to say the least) sucked every last drop of freshly ejaculated spunk right off of all five fingers of his left hand, one by one.

"OOH, did someone say FASHION DESIGNERS?!" Leon suddenly sprung right back up onto his feet and overjoyedly yelled at the tops of his lungs with excitement.

"Why, we've got JUST the things for YOU...(YAWN)" Chuck begrudgingly, tiredly sighed as he and Leon dutifully led (more accurately, toured) Maggie and Hutchison to the nearby fashion-designing room on the asylum's first floor...through a nice big (West Wing, first floor, frontmost layer) brick cell corridor (half) full of horribly distraught and completely overglorified PRISONERS (all locked up in back-wall cells, naturally) who were all rather clearly every bit as agonizingly trapped in their straitjackets as Maggie herself was, of course! Needless to say, the mere sight of these poor souls and what being trapped in the asylum had done to them made Maggie feel rather uncomfortable to put it LIGHTLY.

"JUST YOU WAIT, EVIL STOCKING PUPPETS IN SCRUMPTIOUS DOG-POOP CLOTHING! One of these days, I smell to Feet...me and Lama Goldendoodle will collectively SHAVE, yes, SHAVE the ENTIRE WORLD into the great and powerful Compactor Of Doom until there is literally nothing left of it but a great big pile of shopping carts LOADED WITH THE ASHEN REMAINS OF EVERY LAST SOCK AND LLAMA KNOWN TO FOOT-KIND! And they told me MY feet were the ones that stank!" Submarine Manatee (an anthropomorphic manatee version of the real-life Submarine Man's Plotagon persona, as the name clearly suggests) began nonsensically, barefootedly babbling in an obnoxiously high-pitched and quite nearly indecipherable Autotune-filtered voice as he wildly writhed around on the floor of his cell and used the piece of white sidewalk chalk that he just so happened to be holding between the big and index toes of his left foot to manically scrawl random pictures of the very same objects that he had just been talking about all over the walls of said cell. Meanwhile, Hutchison and the Chameleon Brothers just annoyedly covered their ears to stop said ears from violently bleeding.

"OH, how I yearn for death's sweet embrace..." Maggie internally groaned and externally wept in helpless agony as several drops of blood suddenly dripped from the sides of her head and fell onto the floor while her poor little antennae crinkled in revulsion; needless to say, she could have easily used her hands to protect all four of those precious little hearing organs of hers if it weren't for THAT NIGHTMARISHLY CONSTRICTIVE FREAKING OUTFIT OF HERS.

"PLEASE! SOMEBODY! LET ME (twitches her head, closes her left eye and grinds her teeth like a maniac) OUT OF HERE, I'M BEGGING YOU! FOR GOD'S (TWITCH) SAKE, ALL I (TWITCH) WANT IS TO SIMPLY BE ABLE TO (TWITCH) SEE MY FAMILY AGAIN! Tee hee hee...YES...my so-called (VIOLENT TWITCH) FAMILY...that raped me right in the middle of my own (TWITCH) kitchen while this fucking DETESTABLE LITTLE (VIOLENT TWITCH) BRAIN PARASITE OVER HERE MASTURBATED TO IT! MAGGIE REBELLIOUS PESKY, I (TWITCH) SWEAR TO GOD, I'M GOING TO MAKE FUCKING DEEP-FRIED (TWITCH) MINCEMEAT OUT OF YOU THE NEXT TIME I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, DO YOU FUCKING (VIOLENT TWITCH) HEAR ME?! YOU FUCKING SELFISH, DEPLORABLE, SADISTIC LITTLE (EXTREMELY VIOLENT TWITCH) FREAK!" Virginia Wolfe (Heffer Wolfe's adoptive mother who had just recently been the previous "Buzz On How Maggie" story's brain-fetish victim and had also finally been relocated from her former padded cell exactly five floors above her to the brick one depicted here after, believe it or not, roughly seven consecutive days of consistently IMPROVING conduct on her part) confusedly and also-barefootedly cried, roared and shrieked in a truly tragic mixture of sadness, anger AND helpless terror as she sat brokenly and hopelessly in her designated rocking chair, wildly convulsing in her seat and ferociously gnashing her teeth in a VERY truly desperate attempt to break free from her straitjacket (not to mention savagely maul Maggie's skin off in the process, except that the door and surrounding bulletproof-glass front window wall of her cell would unfortunately have still been in the way), accidentally knocking both herself and her rocking chair right over onto the floor of her cell and effectively crying herself to sleep as Hutchison and the Chameleon Brothers each placed their hands firmly on their hips and glared directly into the nervously, "innocently" whistling Maggie's comically oversized, more-than-understandably shifty eyes with the collective burning hatred of easily AT LEAST nine thousand suns.

"Um...uh...erm...heh heh, oh MY! Did...Did I really do THAT to HER?!" Maggie regretfully stammered, trembling and sweating intensely while Hutchison and the Chameleon Brothers just silently and symbolically nodded their heads at her in response, unable to even find the proper words to describe just how immeasurably disgusted they now were with her. "GEE...T-TOUCHE..." Maggie nervously thought to herself, shuddering in horror at the mere thought of what her selfish and spiteful actions in the previous story had put poor old Virginia through as she and her cohorts finally reached the last of the three main attractions for their west-wing hallway tour...ladies and gentlemen, give it up for John Kricfalusi!

"Why...why did Rocko's Modern Life have to exist...why can't every cartoon just BE exactly like good old classic Looney Tunes and my ever-so-dearly-beloved Ren & Stimpy brainchild without having to fucking TRY to...why did the boring-ass script-writing portion of the cartoon development process have to become so heavily prioritized over the actual artistic acuity of the animators when the former of those two things quite frankly was never even the fucking POINT of cartoons in the FIRST god-damned place...why can't all animation critics immediately know how good something is at first glance the way that Ken Tucker does (AUTHOR'S NOTE: Ken Tucker is a fucking pompous, ignorant ass-wipe who QUITE FRANKLY should never have even been allowed to become a so-called "professional" critic of the type of thing that Rocko is in the first place)...why does everything have to think it's so fucking smart now...why couldn't every single thing on Earth have just stayed exactly the way I LIKED it...why...WHY DID THE MINIMUM LEGAL AGE FOR CONSENT HAVE TO BE EIGHTEEN FUCKING YEARS?! WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY?!" John Kricfalusi groveled pathetically on the floor of his cell and VERY long-windedly rambled off of his personal Nostalgia-Tard Woes monologue script (which, naturally, wasn't actually physically written on paper but rather PROGRAMMED INTO HIS MIND from the sheer deadline-exceeding amount of time that he had spent rehearsing it) in a damned-near-flawless impression of his original Ren Hoek voice from the first few seasons of Ren & Stimpy itself, then suddenly threw a ginormous temper tantrum and began wildly shrieking at the tops of his lungs as he also began frantically hopping all around his cell like an armless potato sack racer and viciously tearing up the very same Ren & Stimpy concept art that just so happened to be INCREDIBLY thoroughly lining the walls of his cell with his teeth, foaming grotesquely at the mouth with pure, unbridled rage all the while as his personal radio remarkably fittingly (albeit definitely more than a little pretentiously, to say the least) played the First Movement of Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata in the background.

"Wow, who in the actual Hell shat in HIS Cheerios?" Hutchison mockingly asked through her trusty Flecko corpse-puppet, causing the Chameleon Brothers to snidely throw their arms out beside themselves and roll their eyes in the classic "hell if I know" gesture in response while Maggie desperately struggled to avoid having yet another horrific PTSD flashback at the mere sight of her dead rapist (adoptive) uncle's body, squirming ever-so-hilariously adorably in her cozy little straitjacket in the process. Needless to say, Hutchison and the Chameleon Brothers chose to simply (not to mention HORRIBLY insensitively) point and laugh at the poor little thing as opposed to actually making an effort to comfort her.

"Anyway, now that THAT'S taken care of, it is now officially cosmetic REMODELING TIME!" Chuck merrily threw his arms straight up into the air and sang as he and his cohorts finally reached and entered the rather unsettlingly window-less doorway to the rather disturbingly decadent, conspicuously security-camera-lacking and generally dismal-looking "fashion" room at the end (as in just past the third cell) of the (back wall of the) hallway, which was pretty obviously a repurposed and redecorated torture chamber to say the LEAST (ominous brick walls, incredibly creepy window placement and all, with the only real difference being the electric lights and whatnot); basically all of the usual trappings were still very much there and also in their usual places, just heavily repainted into an obnoxiously girly hot-pink color and legally(?) modified to serve less dangerous purposes. For example, the VERY conveniently desk-sized and desk-shaped chopping block had been converted into a fashion tool storage desk complete with a big, fancy, oval-shaped, LED-lit vanity mirror like the ones that you commonly see in Hollywood studios, the electric chair had been modified into a downright ludicrously technologically-advanced hairstyling chair, the iron maiden had been modified into an acupuncture device, the pillory and stocks were now being used mostly for fetish reasons (and supposedly also to "help" the Chameleon Brothers paint their customers' nails and faces more easily...yeah, RIGHT), and the (now exactly four) handcuff chains dangling from the ceiling were also being used mostly just for fetish reasons.

"Are you ready for the single greatest makeover of your entire LIFE?! WELL?! RAISE YOUR HANDS IF YOU ARE, PLEASE!" Leon jumped for joy and annoyingly over-enthusiastically encouraged Maggie, somehow forgetting that Maggie's arms were still stuck in her straitjacket while Chuck and Hutchison dutifully face-palmed themselves in response.

"Oh, uhh, RIGHT! HEH HEH! SILLY ME! How could I forget such an absurdly simple thing, hmm? You tell ME!" Leon chuckled humiliatedly as he locked the door behind him and more-than-somewhat hesitantly unbuckled/removed Maggie's straitjacket so that her aforementioned makeover could begin; surprisingly, she didn't actually attempt to strangle anyone in the general vicinity upon finally being set free from her repulsively un-fashionable full-torso arm restrainer. Instead, she decided to just submissively (albeit rather profoundly annoyedly) play along with the Chameleon Brothers' incredibly obvious act/game, immediately following them straight over to the vanity desk without another word.

"OOH, I JUST CAN'T WAIT...SHE'S GOING TO LOOK SO UTTERLY DELICIOUS..." Hutchison creepily thought to herself as the marvelously methodical makeover madness began...or, at least, was ABOUT to begin, provided that she was enough of a closeted pedophile to actually be willing to pay the admission price for the Chameleon Brothers' so-called "royal class" service, that is!

"Your new and superficially improved little sweetheart can now officially be yours for as low as $8.95!" Chuck began explaining as he and Leon suddenly swung around 180 entire degrees on their heels and faced Hutchison. "PLUS TAX!" Leon annoyingly added with an exceptionally condescending wink while Hutchison just aggravatedly dug around in her wallet and coin purse, meticulously pulled out the exact amount of cash required for the Chameleon Brothers' payment and handed it to them right on the spot.

"Oh, MAN, Chuck, we're making out like dirty little bandits ALREADY!" Leon merrily chuckled, gleefully twirling his fake mustache with delight as he and Chuck briefly took off their sombreros so that they could VERY unceremoniously and greedily shove the money that they had each just been given RIGHT into them before finally, shifty-eyedly putting them back on.

"Okay, FIRST THINGS FIRST, we REALLY need to do something about this freaky-looking PYRAMID HAIR of yours!" Chuck disgustedly scoffed at Maggie as he and Leon set Maggie down in the vanity table's obligatory wooden chair and creepily ogled her through the mirror while she just audibly gulped in response. "Man, TALK about being tastelessly stereotypical, am I RIGHT?" Chuck rudely teased Maggie, playfully nudging Leon with his right elbow on the last three words of the question while the two of them lecherously stroked their fingers through Maggie's already extremely gorgeous triangle hair, shooting her a frightfully extreme (albeit mirror-reflected) example of the classic "bedroom eyes" glare in the process.

"And where exactly were we planning to do THAT, might I ask?" Maggie nervously asked Chuck and Leon as they dutifully scooped her up into their arms and began comically over-protectively carrying her across the room.

"Why, the Electric CHAIR-Styler, of course!" Chuck and Leon uproariously laughed while Maggie's pupils suddenly shrank to a barely-even-visible size in response.

"What?" Maggie flatly whispered to herself in utter disbelief as Chuck and Leon tightly strapped her arms and legs into the chair, with Chuck then proceeding to manually pull down its obligatory dome-shaped (and also VERY conveniently robotic-tentacle-attached) electrocution helmet onto her poor little head while Leon eagerly began operating the classic-1980s-cartoon-styled manual control console right next to the chair itself.

"Alright, brother; THROW THE SWITCH!" Chuck commanded Leon as Leon vigorously threw the main "electrocution" switch on the electric chair's control console.

"GYAAAAAAHHH!" Maggie shrieked in pain, flashing into skeletal X-ray mode several times as the chair (whose electrical current had thankfully been reduced to the point of being entirely non-lethal to human-sized life-forms like what Maggie had now been grown into...well, provided that the switch-thrower didn't leave it on for more than five seconds too long, that is) shocked the living bejeezus out of her, frying her entire formerly beautiful hairstyle into a great, big, ugly ball of comically outstretched, freakishly curled-by-the-dome hair strands as Leon then proceeded to quickly shut the chair's electrocution function back off while Chuck merrily skipped his way right back over to her pathetically exhausted-looking, bloodshot-eyed self and briefly removed the helmet so that he and Leon could smugly marvel at the "fascinating" results of their little experiment.

"OOH, the classic 'Maggie if she doesn't get her ACT together at some point within the next roughly two months or so' look, how utterly FABULOUS!" Leon snidely jeered at Maggie's expense, patting her on the head in every bit as obnoxiously patronizing of a manner as ever and getting himself statically electrocuted as a result as he and Chuck briefly walked back over to the vanity table and pulled out their trusty makeup/hairstyling tool-box from its bottom-right drawer, then eagerly returned to her so that they could begin the hairstyling process on her while Hutchison eagerly steeled herself into optimal embarrassing-photo-snapping position on the opposite side of the room.

ONE INCREDIBLY CARTOONISH SCRAMBLE OF RANDOM HAIRSTYLING ACTIVITIES BY THE CHAMELEON BROTHERS LATER...

"AAH, YES, THE CLASSIC 'ALPHA BITCH' PONYTAIL! Now you'll SURELY be popular at school!" Chuck and Leon finally turned off the alternate "hair dryer" function of Maggie's helmet, removed said helmet from (literally two entire feet above) her head, and then immediately began to mockingly point and laugh at her while the poor little thing internally wished that her arms were still free so that she could grab her stupid "ponytail" and choke herself to death with it as opposed to having to deal with the insufferable ponces for any longer. Meanwhile, Hutchison was busy using her ever-so-trusty iPhone to take a nice big photograph of Maggie's rather unsurprisingly fitting new (Dawn Swatworthy) hairstyle so that she could share it all over Twitter and Tumblr while Maggie just angrily cursed her own sad, miserable existence underneath her breath.

"EHH...actually, you know what? I think I've got an even BETTER idea for what Maggie's fabulous new hairstyle should be!" Leon quizzically cupped his chin in his right hand and informed Chuck as the two of them eagerly prepared their hairstyling tools for yet another round of humiliatingly garish and pompous ridiculousness.

ANOTHER INCREDIBLY CARTOONISH SCRAMBLE OF RANDOM HAIRSTYLING ACTIVITIES BY THE CHAMELEON BROTHERS LATER...

"OOH, the classic soft-serve ICE CREAM hairdo! STRAWBERRY-FLAVORED, no less! OH, YAHH, this'll be absolutely SURE to WOW all of those meme-loving troglodytes on all of your favorite social media sites!" Chuck and Leon excitedly removed Maggie's hair-dryer helmet from (precisely twenty-four inches above) her head and immediately began overjoyedly laughing themselves to tears at the mere sight of what they had just applied the finishing touches to underneath said helmet, using their handheld mirror to show Maggie her dreadfully gay-looking new(tron) hairdo just for the pure sake of rubbing it in while Maggie aggressively gritted her teeth and lividly seethed with unbearably pent-up rage, causing her face to turn every bit as red as a fully ripened tomato while searing-hot steam vehemently began shooting out from the now-just-barely-visible ear-holes on the sides of her head.

"MUST...NOT...KILL..." Maggie rabidly growled to herself as the camera suddenly zoomed its way directly through her filthy, hairy, wax-coated right ear canal (eardrum and all) until it finally reached her violently throbbing, quite literally steaming-hot brain, which it then proceeded to zoom its way directly into through its upper hemisphere gap so that it could show, through the use of hilariously ugly and obvious CGI, exactly what each of her five most commonly used neural nodes were eagerly thinking of doing to the Chameleon Brothers at that precise moment. Surely enough, node #1 wanted to skin them alive and feed them to a hungry shark; node #2 wanted to go inside their OWN brains and cause untold damage in there until the annoying, frivolous pricks were nothing more than giant green vegetables; node #3 wanted to give each of them a colonic irrigation using water that was filled with broken glass and rusty nails; node #4 wanted both of them to choke to death on each other's semen; last but not least, node #5 wanted to bare-handedly rip Chuck's liver clean out of his chest and violently force-feed it to Leon with fava beans and a nice, tall glass of deliciously rat-poison-infused Chianti while Chuck was bound, gagged and effectively forced to watch, just as Virginia Wolfe had been in the previous story when Maggie had gotten raped nearly to death by Flecko inside of HER brain.

"IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, SHUT THE EVER-LOVING FUCK UP, WOULD YOU PLEASE?!" Maggie boiled completely over with pure, unbridled anger and furiously shrieked at the tops of her lungs, sending the childishly teasing and mocking Chameleon Brothers running all the way over to the opposite side of the room and screaming for dear life in terror while Hutchison merrily began spreading yet ANOTHER incredibly embarrassing photograph of Maggie all over the Internet with her iPhone, sweating feverishly and whistling "innocently" all the while.

YET ANOTHER INCREDIBLY CARTOONISH SCRAMBLE OF RANDOM HAIRSTYLING ACTIVITIES BY THE CHAMELEON BROTHERS LATER...

"Alright; one, two, THREE!" Chuck and Leon anxiously counted down to each other before finally grabbing onto Maggie's helmet in a collective effort and yanking it right off of (the invisible space exactly two feet above) her head for what was now officially the THIRD time in a row, much to Maggie's almost-immeasurable chagrin as the two of them immediately went completely ape-shit over the mere sight of what they had just made, also for literally the THIRD freaking time in a row. Starting to notice an extremely repetitive pattern in this scene yet, by any chance?

"Good HEAVENS! Why, it's none other than the classic JHERI CURL AND PORN STACHE look!" Chuck and Leon covered their mouths and gasped in astonishment while Hutchison took yet ANOTHER horribly degrading photograph of poor little Maggie and spread it all over the Internet with her iPhone. "Best known for appearing in, oh, we don't know, only one of THE most eternally classic gangster movies of all TIME, no less!" Chuck and Leon ecstatically waved their arms back and forth in the air and continued.

"Oh, you were FINISHED? Oh, well allow me to RETORT!" Maggie sarcastically implored, evilly glaring at Chuck and Leon in the process.

"CALL THIS FUCKING EMBARRASSING, CHINTZY GARBAGE OF YOURS 'CLASSIC' AGAIN! I DARE YOU! I DOUBLE-DARE YOU, MOTHERFUCKERS, CALL THIS FUCKING TASTELESS, MONEY-GRUBBING BULLSHIT 'CLASSIC' ONE MORE GOD-DAMNED TIME!" Maggie turned bright red yet again and infuriatedly screamed at the Chameleon Brothers, who both immediately flinched a rather impressive distance backward (not to mention away from her) and gave her the "jazz hands" gesture in response.

"But MAGGIE, we thought black folks such as yourself absolutely LOVED this type of stuff to DEATH! Couldn't get ENOUGH of it, in fact!" Chuck and Leon nervously explained, holding extremely tightly onto their comically large sombreros with all four of their collective hands and giving Maggie the classic "puppy-dog eyes with a side of giant, drooping mustaches and piss-dripping, rapidly wobbling knees" look while Hutchison irritatedly crossed her arms over her chest and gave both of the Chameleon Brothers a truly debilitating case of the stink eye from the opposite side of the room, prompting the two of them to laughably fakely grin at her and weakly wave "hello" to her while also beginning to wobble their knees even MORE rapidly in response.

"Does this look ANYTHING like the type of hairstyle that a fucking WOMAN like myself would want to be PUBLICLY walking around with to you?!" Maggie aggressively gritted her teeth yet again and frustratedly yelled at the Chameleon Brothers, who simply performed yet another extremely frightened "jazz hands" gesture and nervously shook their heads "no" at her as their way of answering said question.

"If by WOMAN you mean fucking obnoxious attention WHORE, then yeah, probably..." Hutchison exhaustedly shrugged her shoulders and bitterly muttered under her breath as the Chameleon Brothers angrily pulled out a great big catalog magazine featuring every single one of their most beloved signature hairstyles from the vanity table and began VERY matter-of-factly displaying every single one of the award-winning contents of its first two pages to her from least to most desirable, with Maggie infuriatingly rejecting every single one.

"HMPH!" the Chameleon Brothers hatefully sneered in disgust at the revoltingly hateful, shockingly spoiled and generally egotistical attitude that Maggie had just recently been showing towards them. "If looking like an anthropomorphic lolicon version of Robert Plant won't fucking work for you, quite literally NOTHING will!" the two of them furiously yelled at her, immediately pulling out their wireless electric shavers from their fashion toolbox and charging straight at her in a truly animalistic fit of disapproval-induced rage and bitterness.

"Oh yeah, PUNISH that fucking sadistic little bitch, why don't you?" Hutchison arousedly mumbled to herself, panting and moaning more contentedly than ever before as she slyly lifted up the front part of her skirt with her hook hand (fully exposing her beautifully long and slender legs), dug her way straight through her panties into her vagina with her left middle finger, and began hatefully fingering herself to the now-blood-curdlingly-screaming Maggie's torturous plight as the Chameleon Brothers brutally, gratuitously sheared every last shred of adorably fluffy sheep's clothing that the selfish little bitch had previously been wearing atop her head (literally right down to the bare, bleeding BONE in not one but SEVERAL cases, no less), maniacally laughing all the while as the entire room was thoroughly filled with the sounds of agonized shrieking and incredibly loud motorized razors.

ONCE THE HEAD-SHAVING SESSION WAS FINALLY OVER...

"TA-DA! Now you look like a truly bonafide SKINHEAD! Feel free to bigotedly order us to get the fuck out of your house any time you like!" Chuck and Leon laughed maliciously at Maggie, with Leon forcefully holding her eyelids open with his hands while Chuck showed her what she now looked like using his handheld mirror. Needless to say, Maggie was already wholeheartedly crying and sobbing in pure and utter defeat and humiliation, making Chuck's and Leon's penises all the more firmly erect to see her as a result.

"Why don't you just get the fuck out of my LIFE, you obnoxiously stereotypical fucking FREAKSHOWS?!" Maggie wailed and wept miserably while Jezediah and Joe suddenly walked into the room to see just what in the actual Hell was going on with Maggie (since none of the other local security guards seemed to be competent or considerate enough to actually do so) and immediately found themselves mischievously grinning from ear to ear at each other in response to seeing Maggie so completely hairless and defenseless.

"We WOULD, you see, but we're already fresh out of community service vacation days!" Chuck and Leon shrugged their shoulders, tossed their arms out beside themselves and sighed dejectedly, then suddenly lurched backward in surprise as Jezediah and Joe very unwelcomely came bounding straight toward them, having already very tightly locked the room's entrance door behind themselves.

"Umm...heh heh...you're...you're not going to ARREST us, are you? We weren't going to rape this poor, sweet little angel, we SWEAR!" Chuck and Leon pathetically cowered, fake-grinned and stammered from how obviously intimidated they were by the wafer-thin, hare-brained, minimum-wage security guards' OH-so-amazingly-royal presence, humiliatedly covering their buck-naked, extremely-firm-erection-displaying crotches with their sombreros and blushing every bit as brightly, warmly and sweatily as they possibly could.

"Uh...TEE HEE...uh, nothing to see here! Move along, move along!" Hutchison also humiliatedly fake-grinned, blushed and stammered in very much the same fashion that the Chameleon Brothers had just adopted, crossing her arms (most importantly her rather conspicuously estrogen-soaked left hand) behind her back and innocently whistling In The Hall Of The Mountain King (by Grieg) to herself with only THE shiftiest eyes and sweatiest forehead that you could possibly imagine someone having.

After blankly staring at the obviously sadistic and pedophilic scene that shamelessly laid before them for several seconds straight, then equally blankly glancing over at each other for several MORE seconds straight, Jezediah and Joe finally came to an extremely important judicial conclusion that laid the groundwork for future story chapters to come.

"Oh, I get it! You guys were playing Glue The White Anglo-Saxon Feathers Onto The Fucking Racist Anti-Donkey-Party Skinhead's Face!" Jezediah clutched his belly and laughed uproariously while Joe merrily followed suit. "Hey, can we join too?" Joe asked curiously, pulling out a paintbrush and a nice big bucket of tar from his utility belt while the Chameleon Brothers just blankly glanced over at each other for several seconds straight before finally rolling their eyes, shrugging their shoulders, throwing their arms out beside themselves and sardonically saying "Oh YAHH, SURE, why not".

"Now this is what I call blackface, BLACK FACE!" Jezediah obnoxiously laughed, yelled and spat all over Maggie's face, snatching the tar bucket and paintbrush right out of Joe's hands and using them to thickly coat Maggie's entire completely hairless head with tar while Hutchison loudly moaned with arousal at the mere sight of such a thing happening.

"Let's see how you like being THIS white, you fucking dick-weed!" Joe hatefully sneered at Maggie as he and Jezediah then proceeded to repeatedly press their thickly feathered arms against literally every possible external part of Maggie's head and then vigorously yank them right back off of her head so that said noggin became completely, humiliatingly coated from scalp to neck with their fluffy white pillow feathers.

"Aww, you're just a little suburban alt-right chicken! CHEEP CHEEP-CHEEP-CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP!" Chuck and Leon childishly teased Maggie, sticking their thumbs into their armpits and flapping their arms up and down like bird wings while Hutchison and the two actual anthropomorphic birds in the room excitedly formed together into a group with them and thus effectively completely engulfed poor, POOR little Maggie in their own agonizingly degrading derision of her.

"I...I HATE MY LIFE...SO...SO VERY MUCH..." Maggie groaned devastatedly as Hutchison, the Chameleon Brothers and the Jez/Joe duo finally set her free from the hairstyling chair, at which point she immediately attempted to fly right out of the room, as well as the entire building altogether...only to then also-immediately get caught by the legs by Joe and Jezediah!

"Oh, NO you don't!" Jezediah playfully chuckled as he and Joe brutally slammed Maggie face-down and face-first onto the floor, stripped her completely naked from head to toe, grabbed her tightly by the arms and forcefully dragged her over to the torture room's double-decker pillory/stock set (of which the pillory portion now had TWICE the arm holes, naturally) with only THE biggest and creepiest of sadistic serial-rapist grins on their faces while Hutchison and the Chameleon Brothers grabbed the fashion toolbox and overjoyedly followed them.

"We've got OTHER entirely different plans for YOU, my friend..." Joe terrifyingly whispered as the Chameleon Brothers angrily locked Maggie's face and hands into the pillory while Hutchison and Jezediah hornily locked her feet into the stocks (yes, due to her secretly having multi-jointed limbs, it actually WAS, in fact, possible for Maggie to be locked into both of these things at once while still standing upright in the process).

"Alright, so now we're going to apply the lipstick and nail polish!" Chuck patronizingly explained to Maggie with only THE most insufferably smug and conniving of evil grins on his face as Hutchison deviously snuck behind her while Joe and Jezediah excitedly grouped themselves together down below at the stocks, where Maggie's tightly bound, tantalizingly soft and sensitive-looking, completely defenseless bare feet were now anxiously wiggling and squirming.

"And if you DARE to try even the most SLIGHTLY funny thing while we're doing so, such as LAUGHING for example, me and Chuck are going to violently SMACK you upside the head like the stupid fucking (Negro) bitch that you are! UNDERSTOOD?" Leon warned Maggie, condescendingly waving his left index finger at her for emphasis while she audibly gulped and submissively nodded "yes" to him in response, her eyes intensely tearing up as her upper lip nervously quivered...but not because she was sad, you see; rather, it was because she was indeed SENSITIVE!

"Now, now, hold STILL, please! This is a VERY DELICATE procedure, you know; why don't you try showing just a little RESPECT for the ART that Leon and I make, HMM?" Chuck teasingly scolded Maggie as he and Leon grabbed one bottle of nail polish each from the fashion toolbox and respectively began re-painting (or at least frustratingly struggling TO re-paint) the "rosy red" fingernails of her tightly pillory-bound hands into a rather surprisingly well-chosen "pulsating purple" color while she just bit her lip, comically bugged her eyes out and tried as hard as she possibly could to stop herself from bursting out into a maniacal, shrieking fit of uncontrollable laughter.

"I'M...I'M...I'M TRYING, FOR GOD'S SAKE!" Maggie hopelessly cried, her face already rapidly turning blue from how hard she was now sucking in her cheeks and holding her breath in a last-ditch effort to keep herself from laughing, knowing quite well that she would NOT be able to hold out for very much longer (if any longer at all, to be honest with you) as Joe and Jezediah mercilessly tickled her down below while Hutchison did much of the same to her from behind.

"COOCHIE COOCHIE COO, motherfucker!" Joe and Jezediah laughed heartily in unison as they wholesomely stroked up and down Maggie's fervently wiggling and twitching bare soles with their feather-hands while Hutchison poked her hook hand and left index finger straight into the poor girl's armpits and began scritching back and forth in them like there was no tomorrow.

"MMMPH!" Maggie strenuously grunted in response as Chuck and Leon finally finished painting the nails of her pinkies and ring fingers and were now moving up to those of her middle and index fingers.

"I must not laugh...laughter is the mind-killer...laughter is the little death that brings total obliteration...I shall hold in my laughter...I shall stone-facedly allow the tickling objects to pass over me and through me. I SHALL NOT LAUGH...I SHALL NOT LAUGH...I SHALL NOT LAUGH...I SHALL NOT LAUGH..." Maggie began internally chanting to herself with what little sanity she still had left in her as Joe and Jezediah began frantically sawing right in-between her adorable little toes with their aforementioned feather-hands and poking into her arches with their beaks while Hutchison tickled her warm, soft belly with her hook hand and briefly shoved the feather portion of a feather duster right up her wondrously tight little ass with the real one. "Oh, FUCK it..." Maggie regretfully thought to herself while Joe and Jezediah suddenly began scratching all over the bottoms of her feet with the pointy little talons of their OWN (perpetually) bare feet as Hutchison began rapidly thrusting the feather duster in and out of her tantalizingly moist and veiny little 12-year-old vagina just as Chuck and Leon were RIGHT about to finish painting her thumbnails.

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH! OH, DEAR GAW-HAW-HAW-HAWD, I CAN'T TAY-HAY-HAY-HAKE IT ANYMORE! LET ME OUT! PLEASE LE-HEH-HEH-HET ME OUT OF HEE-HEE-HEE-HEERE, I'M BE-HE-HE-HEGGING YOO-HOO-HOO-HOU! PLEE-HEE-HEE-HEE-HEE-HEE-HEEASE!" Maggie almost literally DIED laughing, wildly pounding her fists against thin air and hyperactively twitching her feet every which way imaginable as veritable waterfalls of laughter-induced tears began gushing and streaming down her face, unfortunately not actually washing off the tar OR the feathers; what it DID do, however, was make Chuck and Leon SEETHINGLY angry.

"HOW DARE YOU DISOBEY US, YOU FUCKING STUPID (NEGRO) WHORE?!" Chuck yelled furiously at Maggie, brutally slugging her across the right side of her face while Leon did much of the same across the left side of her face, except that what Leon yelled was "WE'VE GOT ENOUGH MINDLESS FUCKING TOOLS THAT ARE ONLY GOOD FOR LABOR AS IS!".

OVER THIRTY MORE SLUGGINGS OF THIS EXACT SAME VERBALLY ABUSIVE AND GRATUITOUSLY RACIST/SEXIST NATURE LATER...

"Alright, so now that we've finally finished painting your fingernails, we've decided that it's NOW time for us to begin work on your TOENAILS!" Chuck explained to Maggie, contentedly retracting his freshly sperm-dripping erection from the now-brightly-scarlet-colored lips of her violently cum-smeared, double-black-eyed, tar-and-feather-coated face as he and Leon eagerly squatted down onto their knees and dutifully readied the nail polish while Hutchison and the Joe/Jez duo snuck up behind her for some good old-fashioned sexual-assault action.

"And as for those ADORABLE little toes of yours, you'd sure as HELL better believe that we are absolutely going to make those fat little piggies CURL like there's simply NO tomorrow!" Leon chucked grimly, with him and Chuck flopping down onto their bellies and patiently waiting for Joe's, Jezediah's and Hutchison's imminent sexual stimulation of her private orifices to make said toes do exactly that.

"Hey, what do you MEAN by that- OH...OHHH...AHHH...OOOH..." Maggie began loudly and passionately moaning with arousal, drooling a thickly regurgitated mixture of Chuck's and Leon's semen from her mouth as Hutchison stuck her head right up in-between her legs and began lavishly licking the inside of her vagina while Joe and Jezediah took turns savagely ramming their penises STRAIGHT up her ass.

"I REGRET LITERALLY NOTHING ABOUT THIS WHATSOEVER..." Hutchison dementedly thought to herself as she gluttonously gorged herself with Maggie's tongue-crinklingly ripe and tart lady juices, not even slightly showing any sort of tinge of regret whatsoever for just HOW YOUNG of a lady she had just begun to rather gratuitously indulge herself in the borderline-public act of drinking the so-called "lady juices" of.

"ESPECIALLY not being a freakishly small-dicked redneck loser with basically NO fucking moral standards whatsoever!" Jezediah sarcastically laughed at himself as Joe's freshly grilled wiener squirted its gooey white onion relish into Maggie's wholesomely enriched buns.

"Boy, I sure hope your black ass is ENJOYING this!" Joe chuckled as Jezediah's extra-large squeezable mayonnaise bottle thoroughly penetrated Maggie's chocolate starfish with extreme pride and prejudice, bringing Maggie into such a ridiculously extreme state of orgasmic ecstasy that her toes actually DID somewhat begin to curl forward, much to the Chameleon Brothers' immense delight.

"See? I explicitly TOLD you she wouldn't be able to resist doing that!" Leon playfully teased Chuck as the two of them began diligently painting the now-involuntarily-fully-exposed nails of Maggie's pinky toes, ring toes, and middle toes, using literally every last shred of self-restraint that they had left in order to stop themselves from indulgently sucking those incredibly flexible and scrumptiously plump little toes of hers.

"Oh, what the hell? These little babies are literally ASKING for it anyhoo..." Chuck and Leon embarrassedly thought to themselves as they briefly set their nail polish bottles back down onto the floor and dug right into Maggie's utterly breathtaking bare soles with their oh-so-relaxingly moist, warm, scaly and dripping tongues, also simultaneously and VERY luxuriously massaging the entirety of her lovely, lovely feet from balls to heels to arches to metatarsals and absolutely EVERYTHING in between.

"OH, THAT JUST FEELS HEAVENLY...OHHHHHH...AHHHHHH..." Maggie moaned orgasmically, squirting a great big load of estrogen all over Hutchison's face while Chuck and Leon lovingly sucked her big and index toes, leaving the entirety of her feet irresistibly oozing and glistening with saliva while Maggie curled her toes so hard that they quite nearly fell off, giving Chuck and Leon the perfect opportunity to pick their nail polish back up off of the floor and apply the finishing touches to those exceptionally pretty little toenails of hers.

"Sweet mother of SALVADOR, what a precious little vixen..." Chuck and Leon ecstatically moaned and sighed in unison, developing massive heart shapes in their eyes and quite nearly passing out from how incurably lovestruck they were while Maggie actually DID pass out from a combination of sheer physical exhaustion AND sheer relaxation overload.

"Alright, that's it; I'm pretty sure we're done for the day, thank you very much! KAY?!" Hutchison laughed merrily with yet another disturbingly violent tilt of her head, gleefully skipping over to where the Chameleon Brothers were now busy freeing the now-deeply-comatose Maggie from the pillory and stocks and lovingly patting them on the backs with her left hand.

"Now hold on just a sec, partner; what about those HANDCUFF CHAINS up there on the ceiling?" Jezediah pointed straight up at said chains and asked the Chameleon Brothers curiously while Joe just LOOKED straight up, crossed his arms over his chest and assertively nodded his head in firm agreement that there was indeed something missing here.

"Ah, FORGET about those!" Chuck laughed dismissively, swinging his right hand straight down like a cat paw in an obvious visual metaphor for "brushing things off".

"YAHH; we weren't even planning to do anything remotely INTERESTING with them anyway!" Leon chuckled in rather suspiciously specific denial, gently reclothing Maggie and promptly strapping her back into the hairstyling chair so that he and Chuck could begin the Original Hairstyle Restoration process (as if this story wasn't ridiculously-contrived enough already, mind you).

"So, uhh...does that mean we can LEAVE now? And, uh, you know, preferably never speak of this again and whatnot?" Joe asked Chuck as he and Jezediah reluctantly approached the door through which they had previously entered the torture room, wanting absolutely NOTHING more than to make good on the second half of that question while Leon used the chair's control console to convert the hairstyling helmet's function to "Instant Head Cleaner", gasping and sighing with immense surprise and relief as, one massively ostentatious laser-beam light show later, he then lifted said helmet right back off of Maggie to find that not only was she still soundly asleep, but there was also indeed not even a single trace of tar or feathers left on her horrifically bald, bruised and bleeding head.

"NO, NO, STAY HERE, PLEASE!" Chuck urgently implored, eagerly and ever-so-theatrically hand-gesturing for Joe, Jezediah and Hutchison to form a unified group around him and Leon as Leon carefully placed the hairstyling helmet directly back onto Maggie's aching, cripplingly traumatized head while Chuck used the control console to hastily convert said helmet's function to "Brain Reader".

"Hmm...after digging through only-God-knows-how-many desperate suicidal thoughts that were more than likely brought about by what we just did to her among (AHEM) certain other occurrences from the past few weeks of her pathetic, miserable JOKE of a life, I seem to have luckily found an exact memory of what Maggie's brain WISHES her hairstyle still looked like!" Leon gasped in surprise as he fascinatedly skimmed his way through Maggie's personal memory databanks and found an exact, perfectly intact replica of the poor lass' original hairstyle just SITTING there, ripe for the cloning!

"Well, what are we WAITING for? Let's print that son of a bitch OUT, shall we?" Chuck mischievously chuckled and sighed with relief as he merrily converted the hairstyling helmet's function to "Restore Hair From Memory", uploaded the image that Leon had just quite literally picked directly out of Maggie's brain into said function's command box, and then finally hit the Enter key on the control console's main keyboard.

"Wow, does this actually WORK? For REAL?" Hutchison amazedly asked Chuck and Leon in pure wide-eyed disbelief as an abnormally large amount of steam and digital reconstruction lasers suddenly came pouring out from the hairstyling helmet. Meanwhile, Jezediah and Joe just boredly, tiredly yawned and scratched their buttocks.

"You bet your great big juicy ASS it does!" Chuck and Leon ecstatically threw their arms straight up into the air, jumped for joy and gleefully cheered in unison, twirling around and around on their tippy-toes in several 360-degree circles and striking facepalm-inducingly ostentatious matador poses for Joe, Jezediah and Hutchison to exasperatedly shrug, roll their eyes and groan at...then suddenly stop dead in their tracks and dutifully drop their jaws clean onto the FLOOR as Chuck and Leon manually lifted the hairstyling helmet right off of Maggie's head in a combined effort to reveal (drumroll, please) none other than literally the EXACT same beloved "Hershey's-Kiss-shaped" hairdo that she had always been known for, just leisurely sitting right there atop her noggin in its perfectly natural original state!

"Man, that sure is one awfully pretty little MOUTH she's got! WINK, WINK!" Jezediah degenerately chuckled and winked to his brother Joe, playfully nudging him with his left elbow while the still-completely-unconscious Maggie continued to involuntarily drool thick, oozing rivulets of Chuck's and Leon's cum from her nauseatingly underage mouth.

"Aww, but what if the poor lil' lass be DEAD, though?" Joe worriedly, shifty-eyedly whispered into Jezediah's left ear.

"Oh, well THEN it would be even BETTER because she would no longer be able to TATTLE on us! HEH HEH!" Jezediah tightly clutched his chest and uproariously laughed at Maggie's blissfully unbeknownst expense, prompting Joe to revoltedly slap him across the face. "Ow, what was THAT for?" he whined indignantly while Joe, Hutchison and the Chameleon Brothers once again placed their hands firmly on their hips and disappointedly glared at him in response, sticking their tongues out and going "BLEH" at the mere thought.

"You know WHAT?" Chuck gasped. "Speaking of which, we'd better go check on Maggie's vital signs!" he hastily explained, beckoning worriedly for Leon to hurry up and join his cause as the two of them both ran straight back over to the hairstyling chair's control console and converted the helmet's function to "Heartbeat Checker".

"Oh boy, I sure hope we don't get arrested for this..." Leon horrifiedly muttered underneath his breath as he frantically dashed over to the chair itself and placed the hairstyling helmet atop Maggie's head once more while Chuck immediately hit the Enter key on the control console's main keyboard in response.

"Yep, surely enough, she's still alive, that tenacious little devil-spawn!" Chuck threw his arms up into the air and mawkishly cheered (while Leon also did much of the same, of course) as the heartbeat monitor that was now being displayed on the control console rather frighteningly showed Maggie's heart rate DURING her aforementioned coma to be roughly 150 beats per minute.

"Uh...excuse me, but just for the record, couldn't you two have just placed one of your hands OVER her heart to see whether or not it was still beating?" Hutchison threw her arms out beside herself in the classic "seriously, what the fuck, guys" gesture and exasperatedly suggested, still totally flabbergasted by how much blatantly excessive effort the Chameleon Brothers had just put into something as simple as checking to see whether or not a person's heart was pounding out of that person's chest at a given moment.

"Is that what you would call HIP, FANCY and COOL, though?" Chuck and Leon smugly asked her, once again making the classic "oh no, you didn't" gesture for added emphasis while Hutchison just threw her arms out beside her and irritatedly rolled her eyes yet again in response.

"You know what? Never mind..." Hutchison dejectedly leaned forward and dangled her arms straight down toward the ground while Chuck and Leon, after creepily staring at her for several extremely uncomfortable seconds, suddenly had an idea for how they could finally make her actually useful...a horrible, wonderful, AWFUL idea!

"Are you thinking what I'M thinking?" Leon overjoyedly whispered into Chuck's ear as both of their faces contorted themselves into grotesquely massive, completely erect and profoundly mischievous ear-to-ear grins at the mere thought of what they were about to do to poor little Maggie and more importantly her mental health, with Chuck excitedly nodding his head "yes" in response as the two of them both tightly bit their lips, childishly sucked in their cheeks, nervously twirled their comically oversized fake mustaches and began sweating feverishly from how painfully hard they were clearly trying not to burst out into horribly cliched evil laughter at the blissfully unaware Maggie's expense.

"Oh, HUTCH-i-son?" Chuck teasingly crooned in Hutchison's general direction, eagerly beckoning for her to join them as she nervously accepted the offer and walked over to them while Joe and Jezediah just annoyedly crossed their arms over their chests and stayed right where they were, rebelliously deciding that they wanted absolutely nothing to do with what they ostensibly thought that the Chameleon Brothers were planning (Maggie's death, of course) as Leon began shifty-eyedly whispering into Hutchison's left ear.

"Psst psst psst psst psst psst psst psst psst..." Leon explained to Hutchison, causing her to (in exact order) reluctantly nod her head, go "MM-HMM", then suddenly cover her mouth and gasp wholeheartedly in shock. "Oh dear GOD, no, you WOULDN'T!" Hutchison shrieked in terror as the Chameleon Brothers then beckoned for Joe and Jezediah to also walk right on over to them and join their unbelievably despicable cause, which was a request that they (rolled their eyes, shrugged their shoulders and) accepted rather reluctantly to say the least.

"Anyway, long story short: Hutchison, pull out your Grink (Grow/Shrink) Ray from your dress pocket! Leon, you go and hold Maggie's left eye open while I hold her right eye likewise! Joe and Jez, prepare to meet your SHRINK!" Chuck assertively commanded everyone, theatrically pointing to each thing and person that he was referring to with his index fingers as he did so.

"Now HOLD ON a second! There are most definitely SEVERAL issues with this so-called PLAN of yours!" Joe frustratedly threw his arms out beside himself and warned Chuck while Leon just quizzically cupped his chin in his right hand, cocked his left eyebrow at Joe and gave him a classic "say what" look in response.

"I mean, besides the fact that it's flat-out HORRIFYINGLY unethical even by OUR standards," Jezediah disgustedly pointed out, sticking his tongue out and gagging/wincing at the mere thought of it, "we're fucking DODO birds! We can't fucking fly in the FIRST god-damned place!"

"Oh, you silly boys, don't you know that that's exactly where O-Town's glorious new SCHLAM-O energy drink comes into play? Here, let me show you!" Leon teasingly swung his hand straight down like a cat paw and chuckled at the two of them, briefly heading back over to the vanity table so that he could yank exactly two cans of said CLEARLY BIOHAZARD-SYMBOL-LABELED energy drink fresh out of its miniature refrigerator (bottom-left) drawer and smarmily hand exactly one to each of them.

"Uhh...just for the record, should we perhaps be worried about these incredibly evil-looking revolver-barrel-shaped symbols on the fronts of these cans?" Joe nervously asked Leon, VERY distrustfully examining the rather profoundly suspicious-looking can that Leon had just handed him and audibly shuddering in response to its nutritional label while Jezediah did much of the same.

"Of COURSE not! I mean, naturally, results of drinking this gloriously unhealthy beverage may vary between different hum-animal species, but in YOUR case, we can gladly confirm through no less than FIVE entire minutes of scientifically accurate Wikipedia research that it actually WILL, in fact, quite literally give you NICE BIG sets of...what were they called again...oh yes, WINGS!" Leon VERY worryingly explained while Joe and Jezediah just briefly glanced at each other and then loudly swallowed their pride in response before finally popping the caps of their new SCHLAM-O cans right open and carelessly guzzling the putrid, toxic sludge that was contained within said cans right down their throats as if they actually WANTED it to grotesquely mutate their bodies to death.

"SO? What do you THINK?" Chuck anxiously asked Joe and Jezediah as all of a sudden, surely enough, actual, snow-white, blatantly copyright-infringing EAGLE WINGS sprouted violently from their backs, busting comically large holes through the backs of their security guard uniforms in the process as the two of them froze dead in their tracks with immeasurable astonishment at what(ever in the actual fuck) had just happened to them.

"HOLY FUCKING SHIT, DUDE, THIS IS TOTALLY WICKED!" Joe and Jezediah both high-fived each other and overjoyedly yelled at the tops of their ever-loving lungs in unison, savagely crushing the aluminum cans that they had just completely emptied of their drink contents (in one fell gulp each, no less) with their foreheads and chucking them right through the pillory's head hole so that they could then victoriously leap straight up into the air, high-five each other yet again and triumphantly yell "SCORE, MOTHERFUCKER" for the whole world to hear.

"Boy, this sure ought to be an awfully EYE-OPENING experience for these two! HMM HM HM HM HM!" Hutchison merrily quipped and giggled, ironically showing almost-total disregard for poor little Maggie's mental health (despite having been officially appointed as her psychiatrist) as she matter-of-factly pulled out her Grink Ray from her aforementioned dress pocket, pointed it directly at the now-valiantly-Superman-posing Joe and Jezediah, set it into Shrink mode and fired it straight at them, causing them to shrink to practically microscopic ant size!

"OH, GEEZE...now we know how FLIES feel..." Joe and Jezediah groaned nauseatedly and fearfully, rapidly flapping their wings in order to stay afloat as they quickly (albeit more than a little hesitantly) made their way respectively toward Maggie's right and left eyeballs while Chuck and Leon respectively held the blissfully unaware lids of said eyes wide open for entry! (AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yes, Maggie was indeed so ridiculously traumatized at this particular moment in time that she actually HAD, in fact, slipped into her vegetative state.)

"GERONIMO!" Joe and Jezediah valiantly yelled, suddenly mutating fish gills onto their necks as they flew straight into the still-fast-asleep Maggie's absurdly massive pupils and vigorously swam their way through the clear, watery vitreous fluid within her generally absurdly massive eyeballs until they finally hit her retinas and, from there, made their way through her optic nerve passageways until they finally reached the terrifyingly fragile and delicate inner workings of her barely-still-functioning brain...which, all things (that had just recently happened to her) considered, was also in rather surprisingly passable mental condition, might I add.

"And you say YOUR method of examining people's minds is effective! How ADORABLE!" Chuck and Leon spitefully teased Hutchison, placing their thumbs onto their ear-holes and blowing great big raspberries at her as the poor little kitten just meekly sat on the floor (with her back pressed against the side of the control console and her legs tightly folded between her also-tightly-folded arms) and softly, sorrowfully whimpered and wept with a rather profoundly "DEAR LORD, WHAT HAVE I JUST DONE" look on her face.

"WOW...it's so beautifully spongy, wrinkly and PINK..." Jezediah lovingly moaned, panted and drooled with arousal as he and Joe finally set (bare) foot in Maggie Rebellious Pesky's glorious, shockingly massive cerebral cortex, taking in the boner-inducingly fascinating view around themselves as the numerous veins contained within her delightfully soft, moist and fleshy brain tissue relaxingly pulsated against their big, beautiful bird toes while her countless neural nodes and pathways flowed endlessly with DNA strands and general information up above. Unlike when her mind stayed WOKE, however, this rather dizzyingly complex network of nerve-cell-transport intersections and tubes, as meticulously and (dare I say) intriguingly packaged into her freakishly large head as it most certainly was indeed, wasn't exactly what a pretentious, jaded, brain-fetished ponce like myself would call "SURGING" with information, which was most definitely the first and foremost problem from basically anything even remotely resembling a reasonable moral perspective...which, naturally, was exactly why the Chameleon Brothers so fervently begged Joe and Jezediah to differ on what the actual most important problem with Maggie's mental condition at the time was.

"Umm...EXCUSE me, boss? Something doesn't exactly match up about Maggie's current imprisonment here if you ask me..." Joe pulled out his walkie-talkie from his ever-so-plot-armor-reekingly trusty Birdman (security guard) utility belt and fearfully informed Chuck through it as he and Jezediah flew upward into the web-like midst of Maggie's neural network and found numerous bright-green tubes (where all of the others were bright-blue) that were all explicitly labeled in freakishly large (not to mention freakishly EXISTENT) font as her Mental Stability Regulators; amazingly enough, despite being heavily damaged and flickering on and off at completely random intervals, none of them actually WERE fully broken!

"MM-HMM...I'm listening..." Chuck smugly replied through his own end of the walkie-talkie connection line as he and Leon fascinatedly examined the anatomy of Maggie's poor, POOR little brain themselves using the hairstyling helmet's (again, LUDICROUSLY plot-convenient) "Encephaloscopy" function so that they could see what their little lab rats were talking about (not to mention how bizarrely human-like Maggie's brain itself was, much like those of mostly all of the other hum-animals in the Rocko-Verse...gee, I sure do wonder why).

"Well, you see, while this (African American) is definitely FAR from a stupid one, ESPECIALLY for her age...well, I suppose we're not really entirely sure how to say this without making you and Leon angry, but personally, I'd say we're pretty damned sure at this point that Maggie being declared insane in that one court trial all those days ago actually WAS, in fact, a complete bullshit lie whipped up by liberal media to make us feel sorry for her just because she came from a different ethnicity and gender than our own!" Jezediah long-windedly and jealously explained through his and Joe's end of the walkie-talkie connection line, suddenly growing an extra penis atop his head while Hutchison buried her face into her knees and hopelessly continued crying in the nearest corner of the torture room.

"AMERICANO, por favor!" Chuck sarcastically implored from the other end of the line, yawning loudly and then proceeding to disinterestedly check his right hand for hangnails while Leon lovingly straightened his sombrero and gently hand-tweaked his CLEARLY fake mustache, wishing dearly that Chuck actually WAS courteous enough to do the same for him.

"LISTEN, okay? We know very well how 'inconceivable' and whatnot this might seem to you, but after running a...well, rather GRAPHICALLY close inspection on Maggie's central nervous system, I've gotta say that we're pretty fucking sure that Maggie actually ISN'T, in fact, mentally ill enough to belong here after all! Not even fucking CLOSE, dare I say!" Joe angrily snatched his walkie-talkie back from Jezediah's greedy, bigoted hands (hypocritical, I know) and hastily explained to Chuck and Leon, suddenly growing an extra head atop his regular head as he internally began to VERY seriously question the Chameleon Brothers' moral integrity regarding economically profitable but politically/socially dangerous situations such as this one, shaking his head regretfully and audibly gulping/trembling in the process while Jezediah just hatefully called him an "SJW pussy" underneath his breath.

"Oh, REALLY? Well, let's MAKE her crazy, then! You know what they say about monetary PROFIT made from jobs like locking people up in mental hospitals, right? THE MORE, THE MERRIER!" Chuck laughed every bit as evilly as he could manage, vigorously and ever-so-theatrically twirling his fake mustache with both hands while Leon annoyedly held his walkie-talkie for him, glaring blank-facedly and depressedly at the show's audience all the while as Joe just exhaustedly face-palmed himself and slid said hand all the way down said face in response while Jezediah impatiently put his hands on his hips and began tapping his foot as if waiting for Joe to "man up" and forget about "petty bullshit" like having an actual moral conscience where others around him clearly didn't.

"NO, GOD DAMN IT, DON'T, PLEASE, I'M BEGGING YOU! DO YOU EVEN REALIZE WHAT YOU'RE DOING RIGHT NOW, YOU FUCKING HATEFUL BASTARD?!" Joe flight-lunged straight into Jezediah, grabbed him tightly by the shoulders, looked straight into his eyes, and furiously yelled at him right as he was just about to magically pull out a great big pair of thickly rubber-handled, weapons-grade lawn shears from his OWN utility belt and slowly but surely cut one of Maggie's Mental Stability Regulator cords in half with it.

"Man, KNOCK IT OFF, pansy! What the hell's your PROBLEM anyway? I don't see anything wrong with doing this! It's just BUSINESS, you fucking retard!" Jezediah rudely shoved Joe away from himself and indignantly bitched at him, readying himself to pull out the lawn shears yet again while Joe loudly cleared his throat and hastily readied HIM-self to concisely and passionately explain to his poor, misguided brother why the thing that said brother was clearly about to do WAS, in fact, morally wrong and unacceptable on numerous levels.

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! You REALLY don't FUCKING SEE anything WRONG WITH THIS SITUATION that we're quite literally IN RIGHT NOW?!" Joe furiously snapped at Jezediah, grabbing him forcefully by the collar of his security guard uniform and yanking him RIGHT up against himself so that Jezediah would have no other choice but to look DIRECTLY into his lividly twitching eyes. "THE TEXT! ON THE FRONT OF THOSE WIRES! EXPLICITLY STATES! PLAIN AS A FUCKING HOT SUMMER DAY SMACK-DAB IN THE MIDDLE OF GOD-DAMNED JULY! THAT THE ENTIRE MENTAL WELL-BEING OF THE FUCKING DEFENSELESS, WRONGFULLY IMPRISONED LITTLE GIRL! WHOSE BRAIN AND SURROUNDING HEAD WE ARE LITERALLY INSIDE AS WE FUCKING SPEAK! COMPLETELY REVOLVES AROUND THEM NOT BEING CUT INTO FUCKING PIECES! YOU DUMB, SADISTIC, BIGOTED FUCK!" he suddenly went COMPLETELY nuclear and boiling-hot-redly (albeit immensely cathartically) shrieked at Jezediah at the tops of his ever-loving lungs, shaking him so ridiculously violently that it even caused his eyeballs to dizzily roll around in their sockets and also well-deservedly spitting all over his face from how absurdly passionately he was screaming at him in the process.

"Geez, SAY it, don't SPRAY it..." Jezediah groaned, shaking his head annoyedly at Joe and immediately returning to what he had previously been doing while Joe just depressedly shrugged his shoulders, shamefully hung his OWN head in defeat, and decided that if he wasn't going to be able to stop his brother from doing the (HORRIFICALLY) wrong thing, he might as well at least try and make him feel HAPPY to be doing it.

"CORD CUTTING! CORD CUTTING!" Jezediah merrily sang in the tune of "Spring Cleaning" from the "Zanzibar" episode of Rocko's Modern Life as he excitedly pulled out his lawn shears and began hatefully, selfishly and (as Joe had already just VERY loudly mentioned) outright sadistically snipping Maggie's mental stability wires in twain, one by one, like he just didn't care at all (probably because he DIDN'T).

"DESTROYING MAGGIE'S PSYCHE JUST TO MAKE A BUCK!" Joe screamed and cried in emotional agony; needless to say, he had quite frankly never regretted his actions more thoroughly at any prior point in his entire life as he also began violently sabotaging Maggie's brain from the completely defenseless inside using the exact same deplorable method that his brother was using.

"BRAIN GUTTING! BRAIN GUTTING!" Jezediah gleefully sang, doing a great big loop-dee-loop in the air with absolute delight as he continued internally reducing Maggie into a sad, quivering, brainwashed and pathetic shell of her former self while the Chameleon Brothers whipped out their dicks and began furiously masturbating to the horrifically rapid decline of Maggie's overall psychological health (as shown on the hairstyling chair control console's encephaloscopy display, from which the green dots indicating the wires that Joe and Jezediah were now viciously cutting in twain with their lawn shears were now dropping like...well, like FLIES) all the way down from 75 percent to roughly 8 percent.

"IF YOU GET OFF TO THIS, YOU'RE ONE SICK FUCK!" Joe shrieked and whimpered in an unbearable fit of regret as HE HIMSELF finally cut the very last cord holding Maggie's already-rather-questionable emotional stability together COMPLETELY in half with his lawn shears while Hutchison sprung right back up onto her feet and furiously yelled "SHAME ON YOU" at the Chameleon Brothers.

"Uh...heh heh...WHAT? What did WE do?" Chuck and Leon mortifiedly chuckled, meekly coving their crotches with their hands while Hutchison crossed her arms over her chest and glared disgustedly at them as Maggie's mental stability meter officially reached absolute zero percent, bringing Chuck's plan into its next and THANKFULLY final phase.

"Alright...it's...(sniffles regretfully)...it's done...what...what do we do next?" Joe devastatedly sobbed, cried and asked Chuck through his walkie-talkie while he and Jezediah quite literally hovered right in front of Maggie's Central Nervous Super-Computer, with Jezediah wanting to use it to take control over Maggie for (CHILD-TORTURING) fetish reasons while Joe just wanted to use it to kill himself.

"SIMPLE! Just try not to let your feet touch the inner surface of Maggie's poor, POOR brain until we've officially finished kick-starting it back on!" Chuck merrily explained as he dutifully converted the hairstyling helmet's function to its "Electrocution" default, with Hutchison reluctantly securing it firmly atop Maggie's gratuitously sabotaged head with a hug and a (possibly "goodbye") kiss on her puffy, freckly left cheek before quickly regrouping back to the control console area of the room as Leon theatrically threw the electrocution switch with all of his mangy Mexican might, briefly revealing Maggie's loudly screaming skeleton and poofing out her hair into a great big spiky ball yet again as she finally woke from her coma in a manic fit of extreme paranoia, struggling with all of her OWN might to break free from the hairstyling chair's harnesses.

"OH GOD, PLEASE LET ME OUT OF THIS INFERNAL, WRETCHED CHAIR! I SWEAR TO THE ROYAL SPACE CHICKENS FROM SOMEWHERE WEST OF PITTSBURGH, I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING WRONG AT ALL! AT LEAST NOT WHILE ANYONE WAS BEING FORCED TO WATCH, THAT IS, APART FROM HEFFER AND HIS ENTIRE FUCKING ADOPTIVE FAMILY, I SUPPOSE! GLUTTONOUS, BLOATED, DETESTABLE FUCKING MEAT PUPPETS, ALL OF THEM! THEY'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE! NEVER! I'LL FUCKING KILL THEM ALL IF THEY EVEN THINK OF TRYING IT FOR ONE GOD-DAMNED SECOND! YOU HEAR ME, UNBORN PLASTIC MOCKERY OF MY DEAD RAPIST UNCLE?! WELL?! DO YOU?!" Maggie began incoherently shrieking at the tops of her lungs in All-Caps, rabidly foaming at the mouth and gnashing her teeth like a wild animal as she violently, cryingly shook in her chair.

"Umm...y-YES! Of COURSE I do!" Hutchison horrifiedly picked up Flecko's creepily stuffed and puppet-ized corpse (that she had been dragging along behind her for quite some time now) off of the ground with her left hand and tremblingly, skirt-wettingly, nervous-grinningly used her ventriloquism skills to make Maggie think that it was the real thing. "We, uhh...traveled up Heffer's mom's ear canal into her brain...and then we mind-controlled her into smashing a nice big 400-degree pie right into her face while me and you furiously, um, MASTICATED our potato chips to it...and then we, uh, made her and the rest of her family have a lovely little, err, GET-TOGETHER...and then me and you tied all of the fat little piggies up and let them watch on their very own great big flat-screen television while me and you had a nice big, erm, JAMBOREE with each other in there, ya HEAR? And then you got super-fat from, UHH, eating way too many cookies and whatnot, and I ended up having to, err, make you jog around in circles for several minutes so that you could get rid of all of that excess fat!" she nervously explained through her Flecko puppet while Maggie just speechlessly stared at it in bewildered astonishment.

"OH MY GOD! LIVING GLOB OF DICK-CHEESE THAT TRIED TO CUT ME OPEN AND SAVAGELY DEVOUR MY NEWBORN MAGGOT FETUS, IS THAT YOU?!" Maggie gasped in shock while Joe and Jezediah regretfully discovered that the manual controls for Maggie's brain no longer even worked, since she was now completely beyond control altogether.

"Why, uhh, YES it is!" Hutchison spastically stretched out the side of her dress collar with her hook hand and nervously chuckled. "Come on, let's go home and read you a bedtime story!" she merrily suggested, using her Flecko puppet to encouragingly beckon Maggie to come with her as Chuck and Leon (and Hutchison, to a lesser degree) unfastened her from the hairstyling chair and IMMEDIATELY re-fastened the poor violently tossing and turning little thing into her straitjacket, followed by a vertical gurney and face muzzle that were both clearly ripped straight out of Silence Of The Lambs, and promptly wheeled her back out into the West Wing hallway while whistling as fake-innocently and shifty-eyedly as could be all the while; luckily, the remaining security guards were so amazingly stupid that none of them even took any notice whatsoever to what(ever in the unholy name of Fuck) had just happened in the so-called "fashion" room.

"Oh, don't worry, Hutchison; SANITY grows back!" Chuck patted Hutchison on the back and falsely reassured her with an extremely fake giggling grin on his face as the two of them and Leon dutifully wheeled Maggie over into the East Wing hallway and, from there, her new cell. "At least I THINK it does!" he nervously whispered into Leon's ear, causing Leon's pupils to suddenly shrink to nearly microscopic size as he just blank-facedly shuddered in fear at what his brother had just told him.

Meanwhile, inside Maggie's unspeakably tormented, internally sanity-bleeding brain, Joe and Jezediah had mutated into nearly indescribable tentacle abominations of themselves from the SCHLAM-O energy drink's influence on their cellular structures (and also as rather painstakingly blatant karma for what they had just done to their blissfully unaware new host, need I mention) and were now both eagerly looking for an effective way to finally eliminate their useless, plot-complicating selves from existence once and for all (well, Joe certainly was, at least).

"Hmm, let's see here...what do we have here that actually IS usable in this poor little sap's current mental state..." Joe-Thulhu grotesquely murmured to himself in demonic G-Major through his numerous mouth tentacles, spreading his massive bat wings for emphasis as he meticulously scanned up and down and back and forth across the main control dashboard of Maggie's Central Nervous Super-Computer until finally, at long last, he found a big, shiny red button labeled "Intruder Exterminator".

"OOH, I wonder what THIS button does?" Joe-Thulhu girlishly crooned, fluttering the hideously clawed and scaly fingers of his left hand while eagerly readying the index finger of his right to gladly push the button that would officially wipe him and his miserable joke of a brother clean out of existence once and for all!

"DON'T TOUCH IT!" Jezediarlathotep fiercely slapped Joe-Thulhu's hand away from the button with his left arm (as in one of the exactly five remaining parts of his body that WASN'T some kind of grotesquely deformed tentacle, mouth and/or pustule, with the other four being his two right arms and the main portions of his legs) with the horrifyingly misplaced and face-lacking mouth near the bottom of his head tentacle (his eyes and beak were at the top) and began angrily screaming at him. "THAT'S THE INTRUDER EXTERMINATOR BUTTON, YOU BUTT-UGLY FOOL!"

"Oh, come on, what's this button going to do to us that we aren't already asking for in the FIRST Azathoth-forsaken place?" Joe-Thulhu indignantly shrugged his shoulders and groaned.

"THAT'S JUST IT! WE DON'T FUCKING KNOW!" Jezediarlathotep angrily grabbed Joe-Thulhu by the tentacle-beard with all three of his hands and urgently explained to him.

"With our luck, MAYBE it'll kill us, or MAYBE it'll just cause some kind of freak-accident chemical reaction that'll end up mutating us into an even MORE hideous state! I GUESS WE'LL NEVER KNOW! CAUSE I'M NOT GOING TO LET YOU FIND OUT, MOTHERFUCKER!" Jezediarlathotep continued explaining to Joe-Thulhu in a rather shockingly calm and gentlemanly tone, then suddenly began yelling at him like a complete madman as he attempted to tightly ensnare him in his tentacles...except that Joe-Thulhu was now far too strong for it to actually work on him, so it had basically no effect whatsoever.

"You know what? FINE. WHATEVER. I give up. Just do what you have to; I'll be waiting..." Jezediarlathotep regretfully sighed with a rather surprising tinge of modesty and humility on his part, using his tentacles to deftly scale Maggie's neural network like a giant organic jungle gym while also using demonic incantations to reform some of the poor girl's mental stability wires back together. Unfortunately, however, due to how much his power had been weakened by his now-laughably-diminutive size, he was only able to repair exactly half of said wires before completely running out of magical energy and exhaustedly, almost-comatosely collapsing back down onto the floor of her brain; it seemed that her psychiatrist was just going to have to fix the rest of them herself, IF that was even possible at this point. Meanwhile, surely enough, Joe-Thulhu was already desperately struggling NOT to push the aforementioned Intruder Exterminator button that laid before him.

"Oh, my dear LORD, how long can trusty eldritch-abomination-posing-as-anthropomorphic-dodo cadet Joe-Thulhu hold out? HOW can he POSSIBLY resist the DIABOLICAL URGE to press the button which could very well end up erasing his VERY EXISTENCE? WILL his tortured mind give in to its UNCONTROLLABLE desires?" Flecko's ghost suddenly materialized itself from Maggie's traumatic memory banks and began melodramatically asking the audience while Joe-Thulhu tried with all of his might to avert his ominously glowing eyes FROM said button but just (quite literally) could NOT do it to save his own life.

"CAN HE WITHSTAND THE TEMPTATION to push the button that, EVEN NOW, beckons him EVER CLOSER? WILL he succumb to the maddening urge to erase himself for the greater good of his blissfully unaware host's OWN mental health? AT THE MERE PUSH OF A SINGLE GOD-FORSAKEN BUTTON?!" Flecko's ghost continued melodramatically asking the audience, somehow grabbing Joe-Thulhu and easily lifting him up so that his entire face was planted DIRECTLY above the Intruder Exterminator Button!

"THE BEAUTIFUL, SHINY BUTTON!" Flecko's ghost laughed maliciously as he briefly but EXTREMELY mockingly began rolling Joe-Thulhu back and forth against the floor of Maggie's brain as if he were a rolling pin.

"THE JOLLY, LOLI-LIKE BUTTON!" Flecko's ghost laughed even MORE maliciously, once again lifting Joe-Thulhu up and planting his face directly above the button with downright freakish ease. "Will he hold out, folks? CAN he hold out?!" he began laughing uproariously as he finally set the now rather frighteningly twitchy-eyed Joe-Thulhu right back down into his seat so that he could inevitably end up delivering this chapter's grand finale once and for all!

"NO, I FUCKING CAN'T!" Joe-Thulhu maniacally shrieked at the tops of his lungs, his mouth tentacles disgustingly flapping every which way with pure unbridled wrath as he dramatically lifted his right index finger several feet above the Intruder Exterminator button, then, just as Jezediarlathotep came running up behind him and began yelling desperately for him to stop, slammed it RIGHT down onto said jolly, loli-like button with literally ALL of his might, actually BREAKING it into several pieces in the process as a giant laser cannon suddenly appeared right above Maggie's eye-socket display screen and vaporized the two of them into COMPLETELY featureless and unrecognizable ashes, unfortunately leaving the now tightly asylum-cell-confined Maggie with only HALF of a properly functional brain left despite their best efforts to redeem themselves as characters BEFORE being killed off rather than AFTER the fact.

MORAL OF THE STORY-SIZED CHAPTER: Sometimes, the hardest choices really DO, in fact, require the strongest wills.