things not to do at HQ- Chapter Two
3. One must not question Edward Elric's masculinity.
Edward yawned and smiled, stretching his limbs out, "Ah, it's good to be back in central HQ" he said.
"Even though you'll have to see the colonel again?" Alphonse asked and Ed immediately slumped down, "way to ruin my good mood Al, aren't you supposed to be the kind and caring brother?"
Alphonse frowned- or would have if he still had eyebrows-, "And what are you supposed to be?
Edwards chest puffed up, "the tough, masculine older brother of course!"
Al snorted very loudly, "Riiiiight… tough- 'course…. Hem hem- tough…"
"And what is that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing, brother! But you should stop telling lies- it's bad for you."
"AND WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?"
"Just something about the 'masculine' comment you made" Alphonse replied cheekily and Edward narrowed his eyes.
"AND WHAT THE F**K IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?"
"Have you looked in the mirror lately?" Alphonse answered gesturing to his braid.
"And what, pray tell, is wrong with my hair?" Steam was coming out of Edward's ears as he clapped his hands and transmuted a giant fist out of the wall.
"N-nothing…" Al answered, trembling and his brother smirked.
4. One may not induce a food-fight in the cafeteria.
Riza Hawkeye was having a good day. The colonel had actually done his paperwork, Havoc hadn't smoked inside, Breda hadn't impersonated Armstrong, Feury and Falman hadn't convinced themselves that there was a warehouse 13 and Black Hayate had been very obedient all day long. Ah, she sighed and thought, yes, today'sa good day.
Indeed Riza Hawkeye WAS having a good day- but then came lunch. She should have noticed something was up when the rest of 'team mustang' were whispering to each other in a corner for half an hour, but due to her good day, she was a little less uptight. However, while Riza was eating her lasagna she heard the two fateful words exit Havoc's mouth.
"FOOD FIGHT!" he commanded, throwing a jacket potato at Juliet Douglas. This potato was quickly dodged, and however and hit some random in the face. This random then threw their frittata at Ms. Douglas, who this time was hit square in the chest of her white blouse. Juliet then retaliated by throwing her entire tray of spaghetti at the group of newbie's the frittata had come from. Within seconds this incident had exploded into a full-blown food fight, and even the Fureh seemed to be having fun.
Hawkeye, however, had had enough. She cocked her gun and started firing at will. Needless to say, it was definitely not Team Mustang's best idea to start a food fight.
5. One may introduce military transvestite day.
… Oh, the horror O_o *eye twitch*.
A/N: So what do you think?