Ring ring...

Ghastly answered.

"Hello?"

"Hello."

"Is that you, Skulduggery?"

"No, it's me Skulduggery."

"That's what I said!"

"No, you said is it you, Skulduggery, whereas I said its me, Skulduggery."

Ghastly sighed, knowing Skulduggery wouldn't drop the topic unless he did it first.

"What is it, it is 2am in the morning for goodness sakes!"

"Well, I was in the Sanctuary doing that report you forced me to do without a moment's notice beforehand and-"

"I did so! I reminded you for days on end but-"

"Did not"

"Did so"

"Did not"

Did so"

"It's not my fault it didn't register in your nonexistent brain."

"I do so have a brain!" Skulduggery yelled indignantly.

"No," Ghastly said in an over-calm voice, which only served to infuriate Skulduggery further, "Your brain got fried when you were burnt to death".

"Did not!"

"Did so!"

"Ha! You said did so!"

Ghastly sighed "Unless you get to the point Skulduggery, I will hang up on you, and go back to my NICE WARM BED WHICH YOU WOKE ME UP FROM TO ARGUE ABOUT YOUR BRAIN'S NONEXISTENCE!"

When Ghastly got angry, even Skulduggery sometimes got scared. After all, being a fellow Dead Man, he had seen what Ghastly was capable of. Besides, he really had to report what had happened.

"Fine, fine," he sulked. "I'll tell you now. Well, first I was doing the report you forced me to do and then someone screamed so I went to investigate and then the Mage on duty was dead and someone had gone into the room where the Sceptre of the Ancients was kept so I waited for them to come out so I could knock them out and retrieve the Sceptre and then something did come out but it was a floating head and I tripped it's body but the body was really fat and I got squished but I managed to crawl out and I shot the person in the head and the sorcerer died and then I realised there was another person but he or she escaped and they stole the Sceptre so now we have to find it and..." Skulduggery said in one long breath which went on and on and on and on and on. However, he trailed off at Ghastly's furious, disbelieving voice. He was quite sure by this point that this was all a prank and was (unsurprisingly) extremely annoyed.

"So you're telling me that in the middle of the night, you were attacked by a floating head with a fat body that squashed you and whose partner you didn't see, and whose partner escaped with one of the most closely guessed artefacts in the world. COULD'NT YOU HAVE WAITED UNTIL LATER TO PRANK ME, WHEN I HAD HAD A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP AND COULD JUST ABOUT PUT UP WITH YOUR NONSENSE?!"

Skulduggery gulped. "When you put it like that, it doesn't sound quite so believable, even to me, but I swear on my wife and child's graves that it is perfectly true."

Ghastly moaned and rubbed his forehead. He knew now that it wasn't actually a prank, as unbelievable as it sounded, as Skulduggery never swore on his wife and child's graves unless he was talking in the utmost sincerity. And he certainly wouldn't do it for a prank. Grudgingly, he replied:

"In that case, you'd better go call Erskine. And be nice. I'm sure he'll agree that he doesn't like being woken up at this time in the morning. And that you don't have a brain."

"Ok" came Skulduggery's voice. "And I do so have a brain, which I will prove when I see you tomorrow. Adios!"

Ghastly exhaled with relief and set the telephone on the table, glad that Skulduggery's annoying voice would not be heard one more time- not for him, anyway, as he felt like he would explode if he heard one more word from that man. Skeleton. Conscience. Whatever. He walked back a couple of paces and flopped down on his bed, thinking over the night's strange events. He was just drifting to sleep when he heard Skulduggery's voice come out of the telephone AGAIN! How had he managed to get through?!

"Um, Ghastly," came the voice.

"What?" Ghastly growled in a menacing voice.

"How do you end the call?"

"Like this. And if you call me one more time I will absolutely murder you."

Ghastly growled and slammed the phone shut, abruptly cutting off the call. On the other end, Skulduggery listened to the static for several moments before realising that the call had been cut off.

'Did I do something wrong?' He wondered to himself.

He called Ghastly to ask.