Chapter Two: The King's Game-Couple's Edition!
The day after we started Mission: Fake Couple, I arrived at the club a little later than usual. When I approached the door to the Neighbors' Club, I gulped down the saliva that had collected in my throat. Today would be the first day that Yozora and I would be going out!
While pushing away my distracting thoughts, I entered the clubroom. Everyone was gathered together around the table, including Kobato who had been absent the day before.
"You're late Niku. How long did you intend to make us wait?" Yozora stood with her arms crossed and foot tapping. It was evident that she, along with the others, had been impatiently waiting for my arrival.
"Sorry, some things came up. Heheh." I let out a pathetic laugh and sat myself down on the sofa.
"Now that everyone is present, let's decide what we should do. Kodaka! What are some activities that lovers do together?" Yozora pointed her finger at the unsuspecting Kodaka.
"Eh? W-well since I don't know too much about dating, I can't really give any good examples, but I've seen couples do stuff like hold hands in public."
"Why the hell would they do something as embarrassing as that?" Yozora's face flushed red as her hands squired around.
"Ah, Rika has vast knowledge about what couples would do. Let's see…they %&%#^$ each other's %&#%^%# along with $^# and %&#^$% $%$ 42%$% ..."
Kodaka nearly slammed his hand into Rika's face, which at the moment…was very scary to look at.
"Well…seeing that everyone has differing ideas about what couples do together, let's do something like…the King's game. You know, something like everyone submits a few ideas about what couples could do together and such and put it into a box. Each couple could draw out an idea and practice various activities that real couples would do together."
Kodaka brightened up and put on a face of "I'm a real genius for thinking of this idea".
"Kodaka, do you have a thing for picking pieces of paper out of a box at random? However, it's not a bad idea…let's do it." Yozora went to the corner of the room to retrieve an empty box.
Not long after, everyone had thrown in a few ideas of their own into the box, and the game was ready to begin.
"Alright! Rika will volunteer to pick out the papers from the box along with picking out the couples from the other box…"
We ended up using a separate box to put in papers showing which couple was to perform the tasks so that Rika couldn't somehow manipulate which people would do what.
"Ok! First is…Yozora-senpai and Sena-senpai. You two will hold hands…What the f*ck? That's not fun at all."
Kodaka, who was right next to Rika, had his face turned pale after apparently hearing what Rika had said at the end.
"Holding hands? That's not a lot at all. Which coward even put that in?" Despite what was coming out of her mouth, Yozora's face, once again flushed red.
"How do we do this?" I reached for Yozora's hand and took it in a manner of how businessmen would shake hands after introducing themselves.
"I-is this how you do it?"
"A-are you an idiot, Niku? Y-you're supposed to intertwine your fingers like this…and um…hold your hand in a tighter grip."
Yozora's hands were trembling as she tried to be the experienced one.
"Ah…I knew that! I was just trying to test if you knew. Stupid Yozora!"
Her hands are so tiny and fragile…and she's still shaking. What the heck? Why is she so cute? Oh crap, my hands are starting to sweat.
"Niku, your dirty meat juice is getting my hand wet…"
Yozora, with a face full of disgust but slightly blushing, pulled her hand away.
"Rika! Pull out the next one already!"
"Thank you for that eye-candy, Yozora-senpai. Rika feels the urge to go to the Rika Room now. Rika is struggling to hold back her temptations!"
With a slap on the back of the head by Kodaka, Rika returned back to her normal state…that is if her usual state can even be called "normal".
"Ok, the next one is Kodaka-senpai and Kobato, and one of you guys will make a poem about what you love about the other. Pfft" Rika held her hand to her mouth after completing her sentence in an attempt to hide her laughter.
Kodaka ducked his head down once again.
"I never imagined that my idea would be picked…."
He looked up again and stood on his feet.
"Well, Kobato, um here I go… Gofun!
Kobato, my little sister
She isn't annoying…unlike a blister
She is cute
Not at all a brute
She loves to eat my food
I love how she's sometimes rude
Kobatoooo~
Yaaayyy~"
It looked like Kodaka's last drop of sanity washed away as his soulless face slumped down onto the sofa.
"An-chan!"
Kobato sprung herself onto her older brother and face-planted into his chest. What a…nice couple?
It looked like Rika also had enough of the act because she immediately picked out the next two pieces of paper from the boxes.
"Ah… it's Yozora-senpai and Sena-senpai again. One of you will lie on the other's lap."
"L-like a lap-pillow?" I could feel a creepy smile crawl onto face. Whoever submitted that idea, thank you very much.
"L-let's just get this over with."
Yozora slowly settled her head onto my lap with her face facing away from my torso.
"Niku…you sure have been pigging out lately, huh?"
Yozora's fingers gently pinched my inner thigh.
"Guuhh…S-so what if I did?"
"It's particularly squishy. I knew that you had lots of MEAT on your bones. But I didn't know that your body contained this much useless MEAT." A sadistic smile appeared as Yozora continued to squeeze…my "useless meat".
"Sh-shut up Yozora!"
"Huh? You want me to shut up, Niku? Since you're a super-Masochist, I bet that you enjoy this. You love it when I insult your MEAT, don't you? You big lump of lewd pig meat."
"N-no way. That's not true."
Tears started forming in my eyes as the sadist-mode Yozora continued to lash me with harsh words.
"But…I guess your legs do feel kind of nice…"
Yozora whispered something that was inaudible to everyone except me, and I felt my face warm up. No fair, Yozora. You can't switch modes so quickly.
Eventually, Yozora lifted herself from my lap and prompted Rika to continue the game.
It turned out, however, that Rika had escaped in the middle of our turn to go "relieve herself" in the Rika Room. So, Yukimura was asked to take over.
"Ah… I will have to feed the honored fake imouto a banana. 'note: there is a banana inside Rika's bag'"
Why did that girl have to make it so obvious that she was the one who wrote it?
Yukimura quickly fetched the banana and bent down in front of Maria.
"Ahhn…Aniki's fake imouto."
Before Maria had the chance to fully open her mouth, Yukimura jammed the banana into her mouth: the whole 7 inches down all at once.
"Ngg..Fnnng!"
Maria's face turned pale and her head fell limp onto the sofa.
"Aniki, did I feed her well?"
Yukimura turned to Kodaka who had been stunned by Yukimura's actions and was too shocked to even scold him.
After everyone helped Maria to clean out the banana that had been lodged in her throat, Yukimura continued onto the last two pieces of paper.
"Yozora-anego and Sena-anego. One of you will #$$#% the other's $% $."
"W-what?"
I didn't hear that correctly, did I? Yukimura must have said that wrongly, right?
I turned to Yozora in order to confirm the validity of what Yukimura had just said to see that her face was flushing red as ever. I guess I didn't hear anything wrong…
"Are you kidding me? I-I can't do that with Yozora. This is…that is… I'm not ready!"
With that last remark, I ran out of the clubroom in one of my "run-out-of-the-clubroom-screaming-and-crying" moments.
But, before I made it completely out, I could faintly hear Yozora saying something along the lines of "Stupid piece of meat, did you dislike the idea that much?"
Author's Note: I have to thank everyone who commented, especially those who encouraged me to post the second chapter up. That really made me kick myself in the butt and say "hurry up already and release the next chapter!" It seems that everyone was looking forward to this next chapter, so I hope that you aren't disappointed with it. Until next time!