Upon the two finally arrived at Zim's house, his robot parents opened the door, greeting them with their usual "Welcome home, Son!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Zim grumbled, him and Dib pushing past them.

"MASTER! You're home!" a high pitched voice squealed in pure delight as Gir bounded into the room. The happy-go-lucky robot smiled happily until he spotted Dib.

Within a split second, Gir's wide, cyan eyes narrowed and turned a scarlet color and his smile faded away into a deep frown.

"Sir! An intruder has made his way into the house! Do you wish me to dispose of him?" the normally happy voice of Zim's minion now sounded grave and serious, his head opening up to reveal a large gun aimed at Dib's head.

"Unfortunately, not today, Gir. While I would love to see you being competent for once and eliminating the Dib-smelly, sadly, the dirty Dib-pig and I are stuck together, and I'd rather not have to carry around dead weight."

Before Zim could even finish his sentence, the scarlet eyes of the robot turned back into their normal cyan color and the gun went back into his head.

"Okie-dokie, Master! Oh, hi, Dibby!" Gir smiled.

Dib gave the cheerful robot a confused look as he started to bounce around the room on his head.

"Did you just call me...'Dibby'?"

"Yes. Yes, I did," Gir stated before taking a flying leap at Dib's head.

"Dibby! Your head smells just like a SQUIRREL!" he yelled happily.

"We did just come from the woods, so I guess that's-"

Gir's eyes widened and he screamed in Dib's face, "DID YOU SEE A SQUIRREL!?"

"ENOUGH!" Zim yelled before prying Gir off Dib's face. "I need to contact the Tallest about this predicament!"

Zim zoomed toward the kitchen but as he went toward the garbage can, a thought struck him; upon Dib and him getting unstuck, Dib could remember how to get into his secret lab and could try to sabotage his plans.

"Dib-stink, before we go down to my lab, I must take one small precaution first."

"What precaution?"

"This."

Zim grabbed a nearby frying pan and swung it at Dib, striking him upside the head. Dib couldn't even let out a yelp before being knocked out cold.

Zim had carried his enemy to his lab, holding him being the only way to fit both of them down the trash chute leading there.

Upon getting to his lab, Zim walked over to where he sends transmissions and dropped Dib to the floor.

"I swear, hyoomans eat whole cow beasts for breakfast!"

Zim pressed a button and a moment later, his rulers appeared on the large screen.

The Tallest sat at a table and were playing a board game, drinking Poop Cola and gorging on large piles of doughnuts.

Tallest Red glanced up from his game and had to do a double take before letting out a long groan.

"Oh, hello, Zim..." he said in a flat voice before going back to playing the game with his co-ruler.

"Hello, my Almighty Tallest, I'm afraid I have terrible, terrible news. My mission must be put on a stand-still due to an evil doctor of 'friendship'."

Without even glancing up from the game, Tallest Purple spoke up, saying, "Doctor of friendship? That's a stupid title."

"I agree, my Tallest; it indeed sounds stupid. But even with that weak-sounding title, he managed to stop my mission!"

Zim lifted his right arm, revealing the hand stuck to his.

Tallest Purple stifled a laugh as Tallest Red said, "That's a real shame there, Zim. Well, we have to-"

"The evil monster stuck me to a sack of flesh! And not just any sack of flesh, but the one that is the most danger to my mission!"

As if sensing he was being talked about, Dib woke up.

"Hm?" he said, sitting up.

Upon seeing the Tallest, he sprung to his feet.

"IT'S ZIM'S LEADERS! WHERE IN THE UNIVERSE ARE YOU CURRENTLY AT!? WHAT ARE SOME MAJOR WEAKNESSES OF YOUR SPECIES!?"

"Hey, it's that kid!" Tallest Purple said in between sips of Poop Cola.

Zim's eyes narrowed and he elbowed Dib in the ribs before looking back at the Tallest.

"Please ignore this ignorant flesh-beast, my Tallest. I just came to tell you about this 'Dr. Ashencoolaphant'. He is pure evil! A threat to the entirety of the Irken empire! So, if you ever meet him, please shoot him with lasers!"

"Sure thing, Zim! We sure do sympathize with your sticky situation, we'll get right on this very serious issue! Consider it top priority!" Tallest Red said, sarcasm dripping out of his voice as Tallest Purple giggled in the background.

Despite the blatant sarcasm in his leader's voice, Zim beamed at the Tallest.

"Really? Thank you, my Tallest! I knew you would get rid of the problem!" Zim said, delighted at what he thought was genuine care on this matter.

"Uh, Zim's tall leaders, you haven't answered my questions! Plus, I have more."

Zim glared at Dib again, who decided to ignore him.

"What galaxy are you in? Why did you send Zim to Earth? What is your society like? Why are you obsessed with invading the universe? What is Earth's chances of defeating your forces?"

Dib blabbered on and on, asking question after question. After what felt like the millionth question, the Almighty Tallest gave each other a look and, as if they read each other's thoughts, nodded in agreement.

"I'll be right back."

Tallest Purple stood up and went out of view. Once he was completely out of sight, a noise similar to the sound of a person making fake static noises alongside the sound of crumbling paper was heard.

"Did you say something, Zim? I can't hear you! I uh, a meteor shower is interrupting the transmission. You will have to call us back later," Tallest said before he pushed a button.

The transmission then ended, leaving the human and Irken alone in front of a blank, dark screen.

"I didn't know meteor showers could disrupt transmissions!" Zim thought out loud, causing Dib to face palm.

A/N:

Rewritten 8/10/18