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The I'm a cop and you need to stop calling 911 and asking for me every time you're drunk and horny. I know it's seem like an emergency to you but you can't hold the line up like that, sweetheart AU.
Requested by kevlarknight94
I hope this is good, I haven't written smut in forever!
Comments and Critiques make my day! Work Text:
Nicole was sitting at her desk, burning the midnight oil. She was filling out paperwork, trying to stay awake as she listened for any calls coming over the radio.
It wasn't her ideal Saturday night activity, she'd much rather be hanging out with Waverly and Wynonna, but it wasn't a bad gig. Other than the supernatural aspect, Purgatory was a pretty quiet town - especially at night. Locals tended to keep to themselves, or at least stayed far enough out in the country to avoid being a disturbance. Revenants usually stayed in the trailer park, and only an idiot would be stupid enough to go out there alone in the middle of the night.
Nicole was not an idiot.
"Officer Haught, this is Dispatch; we've got a call coming in- specifically requested you as the responding officer." The radio beside her crackled to life, startling her out of busy work.
"Dispatch, this is Officer Haught: the caller requested me?"
"Affirmative."
"Roger that, what's the location?" She switched the call to the portable radio on her shoulder and grabbed her Stetson off it's hook.
"The Earp Homestead."
Her heart dropped to her feet, a call from the Earps could only ever mean bad things, and usually it meant very bad things.
She was halfway out the door of the station before she thought to answer dispatch.
"Roger that, Dispatch, I'm on my way."
The trip to the Homestead took twenty minutes less than it should have, and she was pretty sure her cruiser would need new shocks from flying over the bumps on the gravel road. Her mind was racing through every possible scenario, none of them ending well. She had tried to call Waverly and Wynonna several times, and the fact that she couldn't get either one of them to answer only fueled her anxiety.
The cruiser skidded to a stop and she threw the shifter into park before she jumped out, eyes scanning everywhere for signs of danger.
"Waverly?!" She called out at the top of her lungs, hoping desperately for a response.
The door to the house slotted open, and her hand went to her gun, mentally preparing herself for whatever horror was approaching her. A dark figure slithered out.
"Hey, Haught-stuff."
"Wa-Waverly?" Her hand dropped from her belt, and she squinted into the light now leaking through the doorway.
"I'm really glad you got my call."
She approached the front porch cautiously, glancing behind her for an ambush.
"Well, you called 911, so of course they called me."
"I wanted to be sure you got the message."
"What message?"
"I need you."
"Yeah, I'm here; what's going on? Is everybody okay? Is it Revenants?"
Waverly bounded down the steps and took a leap, forcing Nicole to catch her, hands gripping Waverly's ass as the younger girl's legs wrapped around her waist.
"I need you." Her finger trailed over Nicole's face and down her chest where the top two buttons of her uniform top lay open. The smell of whiskey permeated the air between them.
"Waverly Earp, are you drunk?"
"Define 'drunk'." Her girlfriend giggled and Nicole vowed to kill Wynonna. She wasn't exactly sure what the elder Earp's role was in this, but she was sure it started somewhere around the time the whiskey got involved.
"So let me get this straight-"
"I'm not straight." Waverly giggled again. "Neither are you."
"Trust me, I'm very - " She gasped as Waverly's lips came in contact with her neck. "Very aware of that."
She stumbled slightly.
"Babe, if you don't behave I'm gonna have to put you down."
Waverly's teeth nipped at her ear.
"But you like it when I misbehave."
"Normally yes, but I'm trying to make sure that no one is seriously injured right now." She leaned back as far as she could and Waverly finally pulled back, face schooled into a pout.
"Fine."
"So you got drunk-"
Waverly held her thumb and index finger a hairsbreadth apart.
"And you decided to call 911 and request me to come out here so that you could get a late night booty call?"
Waverly managed to look sheepish.
"How much trouble am I in if I say yes?"
Now that she knew there was no real danger, she felt her good humor return. She also noticed how little clothing her girlfriend was wearing. A short skirt a low cut top that tempted her imagination.
"Oh, I think you're in a lot of trouble."
Waverly giggled, hands coming up to snag the Stetson off Nicole's head and place it on her own.
"What's my punishment, Officer?"
One of her hands worked it's way under the back of Waverly's shirt, tugging her closer and she leaned forward, capturing Waverly's lips with her own.
She tasted like whiskey and Waverly, and Nicole quickly found herself drowning in the sensation.
This was definitely not protocol.
She should definitely go back to the station.
But Waverly's hands were in her hair, already loosening the braid holding it, and she suddenly didn't really care about protocol. Besides, if dispatch needed her, they could reach her.
She stumbled forward, trying to climb the porch stairs without dropping her precious cargo.
Waverly's hand came around to cup her chin, pushing her back until their lips were barely brushing.
"Everybody's in the living room and I don't wanna wait until I get you upstairs."
"I am not having sex in the grass again, that was extremely itchy and-"
"I've never had sex in the back of cop car." Waverly's voice was low, seductive, and Nicole felt a flood of wetness between her legs.
She grinned.
"Well as it happens, I have a cop car right over there."
"Maybe we should put it to good use."
"Maybe we should."
"Maybe you should shut up and fuck me."
Waverly didn't curse often. Of their little group, she was probably the least like to be a potty mouth; although Nicole thought that was probably just because she could curse in so many other languages without anyone ever knowing what she was saying. Regardless, hearing that dirty word roll off those pretty lips did things to her. Things like threaten to make her legs give out from under her from the pure desire surging through her system.
She staggered forward, feeling quite drunk herself as Waverly's lips reclaimed her own.
"Baby, I can't see, we're gonna fall." The words were mumbled into Waverly's mouth and she thought at first the smaller girl hadn't heard her but then her lips moved to Nicole's neck. Finally able to see, she lurched around the stump they were headed for and stumbled to the police cruiser.
They slammed into the side of car a little too hard and she winced.
"Sorry." She breathed.
"Kiss me."
Nicole grinned and snagged Waverly's bottom lip between her teeth. Her tongue traced along the plump lip, tasting the hint of whiskey that remained. Waverly's tongue teased her teeth, and then it was in her mouth again - twisting and tantalizing and and drawing a deep moan out of her throat.
Kissing Waverly easily ranked high on her list of favorite things to do. Even after all these months, the feeling it gave her was indescribable. It was a fluttering around her diaphragm and a heat in her lower abdomen and her head was spinning with the sensation.
She tore her lips from Waverly's, and trailed them down down her neck. The soft skin tasted like Waverly and sweat and she breathed in the scent of perfume and it was perfect, so perfect - her senses overwhelmed and her heart thudding in her chest -
"Nic . . . Nic, please."
She fumbled for the door handle to the back seat, tottering backwards as the door jerked open, and for a moment she was afraid that she was going to fall, but then Waverly was wiggling out of her arms and sliding down her to stand on the ground.
"What're you-"
"You first." Waverly gestured to the backseat.
She grinned again, she loved it when her girlfriend got bossy.
She crawled into the cruiser and flipped over, smirking as Waverly ducked in after her. She was too tall to fit entirely on the backseat and her boots dangled out of the car. Waverly settled on top of her, knees resting on either side of her waist, that damn white Stetson still settled on her head.
She groaned.
"Wave . . . you're killin' me."
Waverly grabbed Nicole's hand and placed it on her chest, dragging it down her body.
"Oh my god, this is like an old high school fantasy I used to have - getting seduced in the back of my police cruiser."
Waverly laughed before she leaned forward, snagging Nicole's earlobe with her teeth.
"Oh yeah? In your fantasy, did I ride your hand until I scream your name? Cause that's exactly what I plan on doing."
Her brain short circuited, and her hips canted upwards on reflex.
"Jesus, Wave."
She trailed her hand up Waverly's bare thigh, slipping her fingers up, past the material of her skirt, up, up -
"You're not wearing any underwear."
She felt Waverly smile against her neck.
"Well, I was expecting you."
Waverly leaned back and Nicole brought her knees up to rest her feet on the seat, framing Waverly in and letting her rest her back on her thighs.
Waverly's hands came up to rest on her abdomen, ripping at the buttons on her uniform shirt. She was grateful - and not for the first time - that her shirt was held together with snaps and not with actual buttons. Her own fingers dipped into the wetness between Waverly's thighs and she groaned again.
"Wave."
"Nicole, please."
She couldn't say no to that, not with Waverly's fingers twisted in her undershirt and Waverly's hips grinding down into hers and Waverly's smell filling the air around her.
She dipped a single finger inside wet heat and Waverly gasped. Her other hand gripped Waverly's thigh, feeling the muscle quivering underneath the surface.
"More - please."
Two fingers now, and Waverly was riding her hand, just as she promised. It was by far the hottest thing that Nicole had ever seen. She curled her fingers that were inside Waverly, searching, hunting for just the right spot.
"Nic."
There it was.
She twisted her hand so that her thumb could reach Waverly's clit, pressing just right against the bundle of nerves until Waverly's head was thrown back, Stetson brushing the roof of the car. For a few minutes, the only sound in the car was their panting, the wordless moans of desire, the sound of fabric brushing fabric and skin gliding on skin.
"Don't stop." The request was needy, breathless.
"I won't, I'm right here, baby, I'm right here."
Gently, she slipped a third finger in and Waverly's inner muscles clenched around her fingers.
"Look at me, Wave."
Even by the dim light of cabin lamp, she could see Waverly's eyes lock on to hers, could feel the electricity shiver down her spine.
"That's it, baby."
"Nic."
She could feel Waverly shaking above her, the edge of release just out of reach.
"Cum for me, Waverly."
"Nic-"
And then Waverly's muscles were quivering around her fingers, milking them as she fell forward, fist twisting in Nicole's shirt as she collapsed on top of her.
She moved her hand from Waverly's thigh to her back, rubbing soothing circles as the shorter girl rode out the aftershocks of her orgasm.
"Oh my god." Waverly finally groaned into her chest.
"Good?" She slowly slipped her fingers out, licking the juices off of each one and Waverly groaned again, staring up at her like she was a piece of chocolate cake.
"So good."
"Well, you know that it's my duty to protect and serve."
"And what a great job you do, Officer Haught." Hands drifted up under Nicole's shirt, teasing the edge of her bra. "But now I think it's my turn-"
The radio on Nicole's shoulder crackled with static before a voice came through.
"Officer Haught, this is Dispatch."
"You've got to be kidding me!" She whined before holding the transmit button.
"Loud and clear dispatch, this is Officer Haught."
"Officer, we've got reports of some unidentified persons tipping cows out at the Smith ranch."
"Roger that, Dispatch, I'm on my way." She turned her head to roll her eyes at Waverly. "Duty calls."
"Later?" Waverly asked, crawling backwards out of the car.
"Oh, you bet." She grabbed her Stetson from where it had fallen on the floor board and slithered her way out. She quickly buttoned her shirt and went to close the back door only to find herself pressed against the cruiser, Waverly's lips on hers. it was a heated kiss, but it was over all too soon, Waverly pulling back and straightening up the collar on her uniform.
"To help tide you over."
"Right."
"I'll be waiting up for you when your shift is over."
What she ever did to deserve this woman she would never know.
"Oh! Here, you might need this." Waverly handed her the hair she had taken out of her braid earlier and Nicole took it gratefully, pulling her hair back in a quick ponytail.
"I love you, ya know."
"I love you too, and not just because you're my 911 booty call."
Nicole narrowed her eyes.
"You're not really drunk are you?"
"Not as much as I may have led on." Waverly smirked.
"You know we can't make this a habit, as much as I would love to. In fact I should probably arrest you, misuse of the 911 system and all."
"It won't happen again, Officer, I swear. I just wanted to mark it off my bucket list."
"I wouldn't say never again, I mean graveyard shift is pretty slow, just text me next time, don't call it in."
Waverly grinned like a kid who was just handed a hundred bucks in a toy store.
"Roger that."
"I have to go."
"Just three more hours."
"I'll be counting them down."
"You're such a sap."
"Only for you."
She gave Waverly one last peck before slipping into the cruiser, the front seat this time, and starting down the long driveway. When she got a hold of these cow tippers, they were gonna wish they had picked another Saturday night activity. One that didn't involve interrupting her emergency booty call.