Author's Note: Hello readers! Most of you are Alice In Wonderland fans while the others are fans of my PPG stories. This is a story to do in the mean time since my computer is in storage. I'm a huge AIW fan. I have the books, seen the movies and everything. I hope you guys enjoy my story as much as I enjoy writing it. Enjoy!

(*) means they are made up words. Of course, what is Alice In Wonderland without weird words? It would do Lewis Carroll no justice now would it?

Chapter I

"Oh Alice!" I heard Hatter cry. He just entered my house with March Hare. They came in whenever they pleased- this is Underland after all. Everyone is odd here. I sat up in my bed with a broad smile on my face. I eagerly ran down the lingy* steps of my Underland house. It was a nice white house near the white palace where the White Queen, Mirana, lived. We were able to rebuild the little town that Hatter once lived in before the Red Queen had it burnt to the ground.

"Guess what day it is!" Hatter exclaimed happily with a smile that was just as broad as mine. I took a seat in my favorite rocker chair with Snowdrop in my lap. Mallymkun was perched on the table, eyeing my kittens. Kitty pattered around the kitchen with glee, too happy to even bother Mallymkun. Mally was an adorable mouse only she was too mean for my liking. Snowdrop purred with delight in my lap. Kitty rolled around on the floor for no particular reason at all. I guess they could sense today was a happy day.

"Why it's Frabjous day of course!" I cheered happily. On this day, a year ago, I slayed the Jabberwock and freed Wonderland- oops- Underland from the evil Red Queen's rule. I would visit my friends here in Underland as often as I could, bringing my kittens along with me. This time I had to leave behind poor Dinah. She was in the kennel, to be taken care of. If she weren't so stubborn, she would have come along with her two offsprings.

"Oh Alice!" I heard March Hare call from somewhere behind me. I quickly turned around, for he was most likely to throw something. I turned just in time to catch a dress, the same one I wore when I pretended to be Um except it was blue with stars instead of hearts. Oh it was absolutely gorgeous! I can't imagine how Hatter managed to duplicate it. I turned to him.

"Thank you so much Hatter!" I said. He bowed with a smile.

"Of course. Anything for you."

Mallymkun perched herself on my right shoulder. She got a good view of the dress. "That's a nice dress. It'd suit you perfectly Alice."

"Why thank you Mally."

"Today is such a joyous day!" Hatter suddenly cried. I gave him an odd look. I've never seen him so happy before. Maybe on this day a year ago, when I slayed the Jabberwocky but other than that, no.

"Calloh! Callay!" chimed Mally. I laughed. They were odd at times this lot. Yet, I loved them none the less.

"I ought to do it! I ought to do it!" Hatter exclaimed. He began to bounce back and forth then his legs and feet began to spin. This signaled the beginning of the famous futterwacken. This brought a smile upon everyone's face of course. Futterwacken was a joyous dance. Suddenly, a mist appeared near the futterwacking Hatter. Ah, Cheshire was here of course. Never really was a Frabjous day celebration without Cheshire!

"You ought to save some futterwacken for the festival," he advised. Hatter stopped futterwacking but he continued to dance about-happy either way. Snowdrop purred once again with merriment from my lap. No one shall be upset on this joyous day! No one indeed!

Somewhere deep in the Outlands, Iracebeth of Crims lay bitterly under a withering tree. Stayne, the Knave of Hearts, lay along with her, weak and withered as much as the tree if not more. His eyes were dark, sunken sockets. He was skinny to the bone, haven lost the ability to move ages ago. He spends his days listening to Iracebeth's spiteful words, much to his dismay. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't kill himself. As a final resort, he starved himself. Not the best way to go- as proven now- but at least he'd die.

"Why Stayne? Why can't you just love me? Why did you try to kill me? I gave you everything! You ungrateful bastard you!" Iracebeth fumed. Her face turned a deep red; as it remained that way about 86% percent of the time.

Oh how she longed to scream 'Off with their head!' but alas, she couldn't. She hadn't been able to for a year now (of course in Underland time, it has been 3). She couldn't take it! Poor Stayne was withering to die! Who was she to spend time with? She seethed with anger. She needed revenge. The more she thought about it, the more she seemed to be losing sanity. She came up with farcical plans to torture her stupid sister and that dreadful Alice. Why, she was madder than the Hatter!

"Won't you just die already!" the big headed witch screamed. Of course, out here, no one could hear her. Only Stayne heard, who could only grunt in reply. He was too weak for any movement at all. He was nothing but dead weight. Iracebeth hadn't been able to eat. She was too small to carry around the immobile Stayne. Therefore, she went days on end without food. She already became delirious.

In pure fury, Iracebeth grabbed the dagger that she kept hidden in the hitch of her dress. She managed to keep that when Mirana mercilessly banished her to the Outlands. She stabbed the knave over and over, blood splashing all over her. She eyes widened with happiness. This brought her certain joy. Her eyes crazed, her mouth twisted to a sickly satisfied grin. As Stayne drew his last breath, the insane woman hungrily drank his spilt blood, devouring the newly stabbed flesh.

Sickening isn't it? Well, I decided to give it a sick twist to the tale. So I guess I added a bit American McGee-type Alice In Wonderland in there. No matter, I enjoyed it. I hope you guys did as well. ~AliceBurtonButtercupMcCracken out!