You Can (Not) Run Away
Chapter 2:
Hours later
Outside Infirmary Ward 3B
Shinji knocked on the metal door.
"H-hello? May I come in?"
"Yes," a calm voice responded from behind the barrier.
He pushed the door open and rolled inside. The same mysterious blue-haired girl he saw in the hallway was propped up on her bed in a sitting position with her eyes trained to a book.
The hospital gown she was wearing appeared to have been constructed of a thin fabric which hardly accounted for the privacy of the individual.
"Er-! I-uh, I'm sorry!" he stammered as he pulled back, covering his eyes as well as reddened cheeks. "I thought you said you were ready!"
Rei rested her novel on her lap as her studying gaze turned to the newcomer.
"You're… you're hardly dressed… I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude."
"You are not intruding," she said. Her voice was quiet and calm, and never once changed from a monotone vocalization.
"S-sorry," he gulped while still covering his eyes. "My name is Shinji Ikari."
"I know."
"Y-you know?"
"Yes, you are the designated Third Child, as I am the designated First Child."
"Eh, uh- right, sorry. I guess I should've already known. Um, I-I was just here to give you these papers from school," Shinji waved them with his free hand as an indication. "Where would you like them?"
"The table will be fine."
"Right."
Shinji pulled his arm covering his eyes away from his face to grab ahold of the wheels while averting his vision from the barely-decent Rei and slowly motioned in the direction where he last saw the table. Unfortunately, this meant that when he found it, the front of his wheelchair accidently sent a couple of the books that were resting on top falling to the floor.
"Sorry! I-I didn't mean to do that," he quickly apologized as he leaned forward to try to pick up the fallen objects. They were, however, slightly too far out of his reach no matter how far he extended himself.
"You do not have to do that."
"No, please, I can do it. It was my fault for knocking them over, I should've watched where I was going. I should be the one to pick them up," he explained, struggling at the simple task.
Rei paused and observed the boy with keen eyes, although from an external perspective she hardly seemed interested. She had seen people in wheelchairs very few times, usually as a temporary means of transportation due to an injury or impairment. In fact, were it not for the commander's insistence that she remain in bed, Rei would have been subject to a wheelchair herself due to Unit 00's outbreak. Therefore, it certainly intrigued her that this person seemed to rely so heavily on his, perhaps as if it were the only stable thing in his life.
Shinji's ordeal ended in an unceremonious manner, however. As he extended himself out of his chair to reach for the book, he was unaware that he had pushed himself closer to the edge of his seat. Gripping only onto the wheels for balance, his body accidently slipped forward, causing him to tumble to pathetically fall to the ground- only to be 'cushioned' by the cold, hospital flooring.
"Ow…" he muttered, "dammit…"
"You did not have to do that."
Shinji pushed himself upright, as he did anytime he fell from his chair. He picked up the books with a free hand and slid them up onto the table where they belonged.
Very slowly and carefully did he pull himself back onto his chair in a practiced motion, although straining himself more than before when he was attempting to pick up what he had unintentionally knocked over. Of course, half his body being dead weight certainly was not beneficial in his endeavor.
After all the books were cleaned up and he was back onto his wheelchair, he reached into his school bag and grabbed the papers, neatly setting them beside the books.
"I'm sorry for my inconvenience," he politely nodded, "I-I'll just go now."
As Shinji rolled out of the room in shame, Rei studied him wordlessly, her one exposed eye tracing his movements- just as she had done when he entered. Eventually did she return to her book, although she quickly realized that during the intermission she had lost her place.
"You ready, Shinji?" Misato called from down the hallway.
"Yeah, ready," he nodded.
"So how was visiting Rei? I hope you didn't take advantage of her!" she teased.
'Like I ever could…' he bitterly thought. It wasn't that he would ever perform such a ribald act, but rather if he ever had the possibility to do anything close with anyone. He certainly wasn't optimistic about his chances, being that paralysis wasn't particularly a turn-on for most people.
"Hey…" Misato scrunched her forehead as she observed his clothes, "your pants are scuffed."
"It's nothing," Shinji mumbled, turning away from his guardian.
"Shinji- if there's anything you need help with, just ask. There's nothing wrong with it getting some help from others-"
"Misato, please- it's nothing."
"Alright. But remember what I said," she sighed and placed her hand on his shoulder. "Let's go home, it's been a long day."
"Rei."
"Sir," she responded stoically. It was the Commander she was addressing, after all.
"How are you feeling?"
"My treatment remains as scheduled. Doctor Akagi reported that I am expected to be cleared for piloting in the next thirty days."
"Get some rest, I have a use for you once you are able to continue testing," he replied, just as the growing stack of papers were caught in the corner of his eye.
"Where did you get these?"
"Pilot Ikari has brought them to me."
"I see," he noted, his emotions hidden behind the amber-tinted glasses.
"Should I not accept these?"
"No," he solemnly responded, "you may continue. It would be beneficial for your education."
"Yes, sir."
Gendo motioned for the door as quietly as he entered right before a final question beckoned his attention.
"Commander?"
"Yes, Rei?"
"What happened to Pilot Ikari?"
The man turned his back to her as the door slid open. "It's irrelevant; a minor accident."
With that, he exited the room and the door shut with a click, leaving Rei alone again with only her books, trapped in the inner mechanisms of her thoughts.
The next few weeks only got busier for Shinji Ikari. At Ritsuko's doctoral insistence, he would be reporting to NERV nearly every afternoon for testing and exercises in his Eva. Judging by the tone of her voice, she was taken back by his daily growth with each test marking a steady improvement.
It was understandably so, as Shinji knew every time he would get inside Eva meant another time to walk; another time to take back six years of his life. Unsurprisingly, his synch ratio had been slowly increasing as a result, reaching nearly fifty-percent synchronization within the course of only a few days.
"Good morning, Ikari," Kensuke and Toji both droned in unison.
Of course, school got better too.
"Good morning, Misato!" they chirped.
"Hey boys!" she called from the kitchen. "Shinji, have fun at school!"
Shinji pushed the two mesmerized companions out the front door before literal drool made its way into the house. It had become routine for the three each morning before school once Toji and Kensuke found out that Shinji lived with the violet beauty known as Misato Katsuragi, although he would casually mention that they don't understand anything about actually living with her as a roommate.
That didn't stop them, however, and they even convinced her that they would come by to pick Shinji up in the mornings just so they could say hello.
School days came and went, although it was much more bearable with the comfort of friends by his side. For the weeks that passes, Rei's seat was empty- just as it was when Shinji first arrived. At Hikari's reluctant requests, he would visit her in the hospital every few days and deliver her homework.
The teacher droned as he always did. It was amazing that he was still teaching, quite frankly. Kensuke mentioned that most qualified folk had left already, and he was one of the few that stuck around. Shinji mindlessly tapped his pencil against his desk. There wasn't much to do in times like these except wait for the glorious sound of the bell.
Today was different.
A muted buzz and chime could be heard coming from his school bag that sat near his extra-wide desk. It was the cellphone Misato got him.
His eyes widened in a combination of fear and surprise, as there was only one reason why it would be calling him during class; the one thing he had been training for ever since he arrived in Tokyo-3.
"An Angel…" Shinji breathed.
Just seconds later, the school's PA system and alarm blared on repeat.
All students and faculty: this is a special state of emergency. Please report to your designated shelters.
The time had finally arrived.
"Okay Shinji, it's going to be like we practiced," Ritsuko's firm voice declared over the intercom system.
"Right," he responded from inside his entry plug, nervously gripping his control yolks. He took slow, controlled breathes just like the ones they taught him in physical therapy many years prior. Just minutes before did he hear of the JSSDF's failed attack on the Angel, the outcome apparently expected by the higher-ups.
Misato cued him in on what was going on aboveground, particularly the use of an N2 mine whose shockwave trembled miles below in the GeoFront.
What kind of monster were these things?
"Synchronization ratio holding at fifty-two percent!" Maya stated.
"Begin launch sequence!" Misato ordered, followed by the affirmation of a NERV tech employee.
Before long, Shinji found his Evangelion sitting at the launch pad that he began growing accustomed to whenever they sent him inside the GeoFront. This time he was going to the city-top, just like in the simulation target practice in his training sessions.
"Are you ready Shinji?" Misato spoke worriedly.
"… Roger."
"Eva launch!"
Unit 01 and Shinji blasted through the many layers of the GeoFront at incredible speeds more intense than any rollercoaster until they reached the opening hatch located in the middle of a Tokyo-3 street. Shinji took a practice step forward, flexing his newfound sensations.
"Shinji, we're sending you a rifle in District 23!"
"Wh-where is it? Where's the Angel?" he stammered apprehensively.
He quickly grabbed the rifle from the building-shaped edifice and clutched onto it just like he had in his simulations. Only this time, it very clearly was not a simulation.
"Shinji! It's coming around the corner!"
As Misato's final words erupted through the intercom, he finally saw it: a monstrous devil whose skin was an unnatural dark-green color with bone plating on its shoulders and around a red orb implanted in its chest like a set of ribs. It possessed no head, instead having two bird skull-like faces marking the top of its chest. It had no eyes, but Shinji could have sworn it was looking right at him.
He froze in fear. This wasn't anything like he would've imagine the Angel. This one was much more terrifying. The demon approached him with earth-shaking steps, threatening the ground he walked on.
"Shinji! Use the rifle!" Misato shouted.
Shinji lifted the enormous gun and held the trigger, forgetting weeks of training in seconds.
Giant flicks of light reflected off its green skin, indicative that these bullets were nothing but pebbles being tossed by a young child.
"I-it's no use!" Shinji exclaimed as the Angel got closer.
In a swift motion, the Angel lashed at him with its mighty claw-hand. If it were not for his split-second instinct to protect himself with the gun, his Evangelion would have been gored instead. Shinji fell backwards, firmly landing his Evangelion's posterior on the hard asphalt.
"Shinji get back!"
Unit 01 just side-jumped away, narrowly avoiding the Angel's foot impacting into his chest and instead shattering the ground like a broken window. As breathing quickened, he flipped a switch from his control console, opening one of his shoulder pylons to reveal the prog knife seldom used in his training. Quickly grabbing it with Unit 01's hand, Shinji desperately swung at the monster with crude form.
The Angel easily anticipated his swings and slashes, avoiding them as if it were second nature. With impossible reflexes, it swung its enormous claw-hand at Unit 01 as it lashed out, seizing the mecha's arm. Shinji flinched as he felt the unfamiliar contact-hold through his neural-links. The green horror took advantage of his misstep, twisting his arm around his shoulder and forcing him to drop the knife.
Shinji broke out in a choked cry, his mind scattered by new sensations of pain.
Unit 01's legs gave away in a position of vulnerability, open to receive the Angel's foot pummeling into his exposed left knee. An audible crack rang through the air; akin to the snapping of twigs. Unit 01's newly-mangled knee bent backwards similarly to a bird's leg but obviously painful for a human.
Shinji screamed in agony, doubling-over in his entry plug as he instinctively hugged onto his contorted arm and leg as the phantom pains pulsating through his body.
"SHINJI!" Misato shouted. "Get him out of there! Eject the entry plug!"
"Negative!" Aoba, one of the bridge crew members, shouted. "It's not responding to our commands!"
Misato turned to the enormous screen displayed across the hollowed deck and stared anxiously through the camera's feed, completely helpless.
The Angel lifted the Evangelion by its head with ease, picking it up like a discarded ragdoll. With blinding fury, its radiant elbow spike continuously thrusted into the helmet until finally piercing through the Eva's skull- Shinji's skull. He screamed and flailed, his cries echoing through the oxygenated pool of LCL.
Finally, the monstrosity released Unit 01, flinging it into the face of a nearby skyscraper.
The last thing Shinji remembered was the feeling of rubble trickling down his Eva's reinforced armor plating as he felt two minds merge as one…
Just minutes later, the interior lighting on the entry plug flickered back to life. He blinked several times trying to bring his lingering thoughts back to the present. His body trembled from shock, mixed with the intermittent twitch that he lacked control over.
Shinji could overhear Misato's recall orders shouted over the intercom as he could feel acidity tingling at the back of his throat. Before he realized he couldn't hold it in any longer, the burning taste of that morning's breakfast decorated the metallic interior of the entry plug.
Shinji awoke with a gasp, taking heavy, rapid breathes as he returned to reality.
'Another hospital…'
The sterile smell of lingering cleaning products and pungent medical supplies filled his nose and mouth. He truly hated this taste.
He brought himself to a half-hearted sitting position by propping himself up with his elbows to survey the room. A faint beeping could be heard by the strange machines beside his bed, and an IV pouch hung nearby. It made him sick.
Shinji stared down at his scrawny legs; the skinny shapes just barely visible through the thin hospital sheets. He absent-mindedly tried willing them to move as if he were in his Eva, but was met with fruitless results, as he expected.
He also found his hand running down the leg that was damaged in the Eva in an attempt at finding any abnormalities, only to conclude to similar results. The phantom pains he experienced during the fight with the Angel felt so vivid and complex; as if he regained the ability to feel those same sensations again.
Undoubtedly, they wouldn't be coming true.
He wouldn't get much more sleep that night.
"Shinji, you really should be resting," Misato spoke with concern.
"It's fine, Misato," he replied without turning away from preparing dinner. "I'm alright."
Misato eyed his cautiously as she sipped from her beer can. He was discharged from the hospital just earlier that morning, yet was despite everything that happened to him in Unit 01, he was casually cutting vegetables as if the previous day's events were ultimately unimportant. She was surprised, to speak little of it. As she and Ritsuko did field research on the remains of the conflict between the Angel and Unit 01, Misato doubted that he would return to pilot- yet he still remained, unknown whether he truly was willing.
Dinner slowly passed by, with few words other than "thank you" or "I'm fine" passed between the two. Misato found herself turning in early, exhausted by a day of monotonous paperwork filed in response to the battle. Meanwhile, Shinji dried himself off from his nightly bathing ritual, something that he became accustomed to due to the lack of time he had in the mornings nowadays to avoid Misato from cooking.
He slumped back onto his bed, careful not to knock away his wheelchair as he hopped out of it. He inserted the earbuds to his S-DAT and let it play its two mesmerizing songs on repeat. That night he never bothered with tucking himself in. It was another chore, as everything always was.
"Mornin' Shinji!" Kensuke beamed at the front door of the Katsuragi apartment.
"Hey, Kensuke," Shinji feebly responded. "Where's Toji?"
"Haven't got a clue. I guess he must already be at school or something- you know, first day back and all. But Shinji, that was you in that giant robot, wasn't it? You were fighting that thing attacking us?"
"Yeah," he frowned. "It…"
"I can't believe it! You get to pilot such an awesome machine! Man I envy you, Ikari!"
"You really shouldn't…"
Misato popped her head around the corner. "Hey boys! Taking Shinji to school- huh? Where's Toji?"
"He didn't show," the freckled boy shrugged.
"Oh, well, have a nice day at school you two!"
"C'mon Shinji, we're going to be late! Besides you gotta tell me what's it like inside that thing!"
Kensuke grabbed Shinji by his wheelchair handlebars and pulled him out of the apartment. Normally, Shinji didn't like it someone tossed him around like that, but today he passively let it happen. Besides, he wasn't in the mood for arguing.
"Hey Ikari, are the rumors true?" a classmate questioned curiously. "Was that really you in that robot?"
"That's right!" Kensuke spoke for him. "He's the pilot! He's the one that saved us all!"
"Wow, really?"
Shinji feebly nodded.
"It's called an Eva! Evangelion Unit 01." Kensuke proudly announced.
Their classmates collectively began gathering around Shinji, the savior of their city, firing off questions and comments he hardly had the energy to respond to.
"Were you scared?"
"What's it like in the Eva?"
"Where do I sign up?"
"Uhh…" he stammered, completely overwhelmed by the newfound attention.
"Hey, back off everyone," Hikari swiftly interjected, "give him some space! Back to your seats!"
"Thanks."
"Don't mention it," she pleasantly responded. "Hey, where's Suzuhara? I thought you guys usually walked together."
"No idea," Kensuke shrugged for the third time that morning.
"You… you don't think he got hurt, do you?" she asked with a twinge of worry.
"Nah, Toji's a tough guy. Plus, he evacuated with us, remember? I'm sure he's fine," Kensuke coolly reassured. "Though… I'm not sure where he would be."
The bell rung, followed by the entrance of their senile teacher. The curious class that was previously fawning over Shinji scrambled back into their seats, Hikari included.
"Rise, Bow, Sit!"
"Hey Shinji, something bothering you? You've been down all day," Kensuke commented.
School ended like any other day, although for the young pilot of Eva Unit 01, this time around it meant a lot more people pestering him about his day job. The two companions strolled –although rolled would be more accurate for one of them— down the afternoon streets of the city, following an unfamiliar route that only Kensuke was knowledgeable of.
"Sorry, it's nothing," Shinji returned.
"C'mon man, you know if you say it's nothing, it means you got something to say," Kensuke perceptively critiqued. "If it's about Toji, I'm sure he's fine."
Before long, the two friends found themselves at the Suzuhara apartment, which was quite a fair ordeal by its external appearance. Kensuke mentioned that Toji's family needed extra space, considering that he lived with his sister, father, and grandfather had to pack together.
Kensuke pressed the plastic button on the nearby door panel, sounding off as a muffled buzzing noise. Seconds passed, and the two couldn't distinguish any sound of movement coming from within. Curious, Kensuke hit the button again; no response.
"Huh," Kensuke aptly commented after the minutes passed, "I guess no one's home. I guess we'll try tomorrow."
And they would. And even the day after that.
But still no word from the tracksuit-clad companion.
It was three days before Toji Suzuhara returned to class.
"Toji!" Kensuke called.
The tall, tanned athlete gave the room a quick survey until his glare found itself with the student sitting by his specialized desk. His eyes narrowed in fiery intent as he stomped over to the boy, the welcome by his glasses-wearing companion gone unnoticed.
"That was you, wasn't it!" Toji snarled.
Shinji let out a small gasp as he was lifted by his collar. His eyes widened in terror as he was suddenly overcome by one of the few people he could call a friend. Kensuke and Hikari stared at the spectacle, jaws agape.
"You were the pilot of that damn robot, weren't you?" he loudly accused. "What the hell were you thinking, destroying our own city!"
Toji's free hand balled into a fist, ready to take a swing. Rage boiled in his mind, an emotion festering for days. He raised his arm and cocked it back, and Shinji reflexively shut his eyes, ready to take the incoming hit- the same reaction he held when he realized he was going to fall down a flight of stairs. His legs dangling loosely below him, the tips of his shoes barely touching the linoleum floor.
Toji hesitated with his fist in the air, realizing his actions in a brief pause of vulnerability just before he swung his arm.
"Suzuhara!" Hikari gasped in the background.
But it never came.
Toji let out an irritated growl. He unfurling his grip on Shinji, allowing the boy to fall limply back into his wheelchair.
Kensuke was the first speak up. "Hey, what's gotten into you?"
Toji puffed air from his nostrils and crossed his arms, diverting his gaze away from the onlookers. "My sister was… caught under a falling building during the attack," he grumbled.
"Oh no…" Hikari breathed, "Is Sakura…?"
"-In the hospital," Suzuhara continued as he leaned on a desk. "She got crushed under some debris when the robot destroyed half the city. Her arm and leg are both shattered."
Shinji's eyes darkened, cast under the shadow of regret as he absorbed Toji's painful words.
"Is that where you've been this time?" Kensuke asked.
"My dad and grandpa are too busy with their jobs so they don't have time to see her, so I'm the only one who visits her. Maybe if the pilot weren't so damn reckless then she wouldn't have to be in that stupid hospital…" he grumbled.
Kensuke opened his mouth tentatively to defend Shinji right as the teacher walked into the room, unaware of the lingering tension. The class scurried back into their seats, marking the beginning of the school day.
Guilt festered in Shinji's mind throughout lunch. He prodded his food with his chopsticks, rolling around the little bits of meat he had prepared that morning. Kensuke studied him, noticing his friend's lack of enthusiasm.
"Just give him a bit time," he said. "Besides, you didn't mean to hurt his kid sister like that."
Shinji frowned, not bothering to look up from his meal. "I should've done something about it," he mumbled. "It's my fault."
"C'mon Shinji! You couldn't have known that would've happened."
"But it still did. He was right to blame me," Shinji sighed, tossing aside his chopsticks beside his barely-touched lunch.
Kensuke shot another glance at him before resigning to the buttons and switches on his new camera.
The satisfying 'fwhoop' of a basketball falling through the net of the hoop was a relaxing sound to hear. It was his favorite pastime, and he felt that being decent the sport certainly made up for his lack of educational prowess.
Toji dribbled the ball and assumed the familiar shooting position. He held the ball in his right hand, steadied by the support of his left, and launched it with careful preparation.
It slammed into the backboard, letting out a distinct tone as it rebounded off the backboard, onto the worn, red rim and bounced across the cement.
Toji, visibly agitated, picked up the ball and shot again, focusing more on the way he launched the orange sphere with his wrist.
His carefulness paid off with a clean throw and the ball sliding down and through the net with grace.
Toji puffed a breath of air through his nose, finally satisfied with his score. Without many people remaining in the city, it was hard to find some people to practice with. The fact that he was visiting his hospitalized sister so frequently made it especially more difficult.
He readied himself again, lining himself up with the hoop and internally calculating the arc he would throw at. He positioned himself in the same manner as before and felt a surge of confidence as the bell just left his fingertips-
"Toji!" shouted a feminine voice.
He jolted, barely affecting the trajectory of the ball yet causing it to collide with the side of the metal rim.
"Hey!" Toji shouted and turned around to view the basketball court's intruder. "What the hell was that for!"
Behind him, Hikari firmly planted her feet. Although she was not the tallest girl in the school, her imposing presence as the leader of Class 2-A certainly gave her a metaphorical height advantage over her fellow classmates.
Toji looked confused. "Huh? Class Rep? What're you doing out here?"
"Doing my job! You shouldn't have treated Shinji like that!"
"Jeez, it's none of your business," Toji grumbled.
"But he's your friend," she replied.
Her authoritative eyes softened and she relaxed her stance. "I… understand where you're coming from. I'm so sorry to hear about what happened to Sakura, I can't imagine what it must be like. My sister, Nozomi- if anything happened to her..."
Toji turned his head away from Hikari, trying to coolly spot something in the distance.
"Point is, Shinji never meant for that to happen."
"Yeah, whatever," Toji mumbled as he rolled his eyes. "I know that."
"Then please just go and apologize to him," she pleaded. "His life is already hard enough- you already know this. The way your sister got hurt; I think he already knows what it's like, and I don't think he would ever want someone in that position."
Toji stood pensively, thinking deeply about Hikari's insightful words.
"If you won't apologize, just go talk to him, okay?" she asked.
He exhaled a deep breath of air. "Fine," he sighed. "I'll… I'll think about it."
As Hikari departed from the courts, Toji picked up the basketball again, preparing himself for another shot with rhythmic dribbles. The ball flung from his fingertips and cleanly slid through the hoop, bouncing along the concrete floor.
The school bell rang- no, it wasn't the school bell. It was the Angel alarm.
A special state of emergency has been declared for the Kanto and Chubu regions surrounding the Tokai District. All residents must evacuate to their designated shelters immediately.
Another Angel was coming.
It was just what they needed.
A/N:
Hi. Sorry it's been longer than I had planned for the release of this chapter. I actually had most of this written out since I released Chapter 1, and I originally intended for them to be released together. However, I absolutely hated writing this at first, and I constantly wanted to revise it, so I had to delay its release for longer than I wanted. But hey, I didn't give up that easily!
Thanks for the reviews, reading, favorites, etc., I really appreciate it.
(I'll try to get Chapter 3 out faster but I have no promises. At all. Seriously it might take longer, I don't know.)