Against the Winds of Fate

spockjasperzukowriting

Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender.

Thank you eleventy7 for beta-ing this and thank you wonderful readers for reading and reviewing!

Two- Gulf

As I watched my husband write the letter to his children, I couldn't help but feel the first stirrings of anxiety and worry. Would they accept me, despite my Fire Nation heritage? And would my nation accept them, despite their Water Tribe heritage?

Hakoda was bent over the letter, writing neatly and carefully. He only occasionally stopped to stare off into space, pondering how to explain our relationship to Katara and Sokka. I looked down at my hands, my chest tightening with a jumbled, chaotic array of feelings. I should have been soothed by the garden around me. I should have been elated with the love I harboured for my new husband as I watched him sit in the brightly lit porch, filling the paper with explanations I knew were analogies. They wouldn't accept me. I was Fire Nation. My cousin had been part of the Southern Raiders: the men who had killed their mother.

I suddenly found it difficult to breathe, although I tried not to let it show. After all, Fire Nation ladies did not show weaknesses, emotional nor physical. Even if I couldn't bend, I had to show strength. I had to burn brightly like the sun. I exuded as much confidence as I could but I had never really experienced such overwhelming doubt as this.

Hakoda emerged from his daze and then wrote down a few more words, finishing off a paragraph with a delicate flourish. He groaned and sat back in his chair, running his fingers through his hair in a manner that only he possessed. He sighed and peered over his shoulder at me, offering me a forced smile. I took my legs off of the velvet couch I was perched upon and patted the spot next to me.

He snorted and shook his head but got up anyway, walking over to me with heavy steps. He plopped himself down in the couch and pulled me tightly into his arms. I rested my head upon his shoulder and sighed.

"I thought this would be easier," he started, chewing his lip and entwining my fingers through his lengthy ones.

I gazed at our hands, smiling and agreeing. "I have never yet seen a poet capture love on paper," I admitted. "The sacrifices and actions that love compels people to make…it's such a variety, who could possibly write it upon paper?"

Hakoda twisted his face and looked at the ground guiltily, pulling his arms from around me and slumping. For a frightening moment, he had years of separation from home and family written all over his face. I was once again reminded of what my world had personally put Hakoda through.

He shut his eyes and took in a deep breath. "You're very brave."

I cupped his cheek and turned his face to mine. "You're braver and always have been. You know that. Being in love with someone is nothing to be afraid of. You have to stand by it. We're meant for each other, and I'm willing to defend how I feel about you!"

He pursed his lips. "You don't know my children, Suiya. Sokka has always needed me the way I used to be. How I was before Kya died. He's always been a person needing routine and consistency. And Katara, she – " He stopped, his eyes glazing over as he turned away from me.

I pulled his face back to mine. "Hakoda, don't question our right to each other! I mean, we could…give Katara waterbending lessons! Enroll Sokka in a school, or something! The Fire Nation isn't that bad!" I protested.

"But we can't pretend the past didn't happen," he replied, grimacing.

"So, let's shape the future into something different," I retorted. "We can make something out of nothing, just like what the Avatar is doing with this world. Just tell me how to fill up this gulf you feel between your children and yourself, and I'll do it."

He shook his head, his weary expression hardening. "Suiya, you aren't listening. The divide between us is big enough all ready. You can't see how deep it is because you are only on one side of it."

"I'm on both sides," I tried.

"I can't see even see the bottom, and I don't know how to build a bridge to my children. How could you even know?"

I closed my eyes, suppressing hurt feelings as I cleared my face of any emotion that threatened to betray me. "Hakoda, your children love you as much as I do. They know what it's like to need somebody. But you're leaving someone else out of the picture."

"Who?" he asked.

"Kya."

"Suiya –"

"Think about her needs as well as your children's. She would want you to try. If you can't look into their eyes while you give them explanations, then you would've rubbed salt in their wounds. You have legitimate reasons to be with me. Your children deserve to know what they are." I looked up at him, pleading with my eyes.

He was staring into the garden, gazing at a blue flower. He was off in his own world again, thinking about things I would never know or understand. I clenched my hands together. At least I had attempted to persuade him.

We stayed silent for many passing minutes; I watched him while he stared at the beautiful nature around us. Both of us were searching for answers, anything to illuminate a solution. A breeze swept through the garden, rustling the flowers and wafting sweet scents around the porch. Hakoda was starting to relax, his shoulders untangling as he sank deeper into the couch. I knew that we wouldn't be talking again for a while, not until he had made up his mind. He was a careful strategist. He thought more than he spoke. So I decided to leave him alone with his thoughts.

I got up and straightened my shoulders, making my way to the front door with poise I had practised for years. But just as I reach out to open the door, I heard a strange sound come from the metal gates connecting a gap in the mansion's walls. There was a screech followed by multiple footsteps pounding on the cobble-stone walkway.

I turned around to see three Fire Nation royal soldiers race through the garden and leap up the porch steps, halting to bow before my husband and I. Hakoda stood up, both of us raising our eyebrows in concern.

"What is the meaning of this?" Hakoda questioned, sounding much like the Water Tribe chief he was.

The highest-ranked soldier looked up, appearing nervous.

"We come bearing important news from the Fire Lord."

I nodded. "Go on, then."

She stood up, trying to keep her face clear of fear. "The Avatar was attacked late last night at the Southern Markets," she stated, drawing in a sharp breath.

The air around us tensed. Hakoda's eyes widened as my heart skipped a beat.

"Who's responsible?" he asked, crossing his arms and reading the soldier's expression impatiently.

The soldier shook her head, guilt crossing her face. "The Avatar wouldn't say. There were no witnesses to supply us with information otherwise."

"Is Aang okay?" I interrupted worriedly.

"He's sustained multiple lacerations and his arm was struck by lightning. The lightning threw him backwards into a building, and the damages have caused massive internal bleeding of the stomach and chest. His condition has not been getting worse, but our own healers cannot sustain him for long," she summarized, teetering on the edge of perspiration. I could tell it was taking all of her effort not to clench her hands. " The Avatar mentioned while momentarily conscious that waterbending could be used for healing. Chief Hakoda, do you know of any waterbending healers that could heal him?"

Hakoda crossed his arms and stared at the floor, deep in thought. I searched his face, trying not to get lost in the heavy tide of emotion that was washing over his features. He finally nodded, his mind returning to the present once more. This put the soldier momentarily at ease.

"There are many skilled waterbenders at the Northern Water Tribe," he began. "Our sister tribe has segregated the genders of their waterbenders heavily: All the men are for fighting, and the women are for healing. The Northern Water Tribe has many fine healers that could mend even the most fatal wounds." He looked the soldier deep in the eye. "They would be hard-pressed to welcome you inside their walls, but if the Avatar is as badly hurt as you say, they would oblige you with some of their finest healers."

The soldier looked slightly panicked. "The Northern Water Tribe is so far away," she pointed out. "Is there not a waterbender in your own tribe that could help us?"

Hakoda was momentarily caught off guard. "Er- I..." He tripped over his words. I averted my gaze. I knew the only name he could bring to mind was his daughter's.

He finally stood a little straighter, crossing his arms and giving the soldiers a hard look. "For the last few years, the Fire Nation has kept all our native waterbenders in prisons. They were only recently returned to their families and their homelands. How could you possibly bring them back to the place they no doubtlessly loath so much?"

She gulped. "I apologize, my lord. I wasn't suggesting we bring them here, but the Fire Lord has told us that the Avatar is in no condition to travel," she explained, on edge once more.

Hakoda scowled, holding the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. "I can't bring any names to mind," he sighed. "The extent I know of healers is that they also have the ability to rapidly heal themselves. Suggest to the Fire Lord that Aang's caretaker's place him in water. If that doesn't work, I will send for waterbenders from the Northern Tribe."

The soldier nodded, bowing and saluting him in the traditional Fire Nation style. "I apologize for interrupting you, Chief Hakoda. The Avatar was only found this morning, nearly dead."

Hakoda winced. "Return to Fire Lord Zuko. I need time to think."

"Yes, my lord," she answered, giving one last bow before wheeling around and striding off through the garden.

My mind was reeling. Aang, a fourteen-year-old boy, was attacked?

I turned to Hakoda, horrified. "Who could've done this to Aang?" I asked.

Hakoda didn't respond, a frown still gracing his features. He pursed his lips and stormed inside the house. I knitted my eyebrows as I quickly walked in after him.

"Hakoda?" I asked. "What's wrong?"

He just shook his head, balling his fists and ascending the stairs rapidly. I folded my arms across my chest, pausing at the base of the stairs.

"Hakoda, don't ignore me!" I exclaimed, frustrated and confused at his behaviour.

He halted and turned around, his blue eyes steely and cold. I flinched, terrified of what I was seeing in him.

"Aang was attacked by the Azkai," he stated flatly.

I blinked. "The Azkai are nothing but a rumour, Hakoda. The unrest of society is being blamed on this made-up organization too often."

"The Azkai are a real threat, Suiya!" he snapped, descending the stairs and bearing over me. I shrank back, submitting under his looming shadow. "Only unimportant officials have been attacked until now. The Avatar has had an attempt on his life. The details of his attack match all reports prior to this day: at night, no one sees or hears the culprits, none of the victims are willing to explain the details, and they are all outside the volcano crater. The Southern Markets are as far away from the volcano as it gets. I've overheard ambassadors saying that they've gotten death threats nailed to their front gates. The frequency of the tales of the Azkai has nearly doubled." He slapped a hand across his forehead. "How could I be so stupid to invite my children over here!" he growled.

I grabbed his wrists with trembling fingers and brought his hands away from his face. "Hakoda, it'll be okay. You need to calm down."

He shut his eyes, pressing his lips into a thin line. "I just...I thought the war was over. I thought peace would be imminent." He opened his eyes, heartbroken. "I just want to see my children again."

"And you will," I reassured, putting all of my strength into sounding sincere. "I want to see them as much as you do. The Azkai have never attacked inside the volcano; we are protected here. I'll hire more security guards. We'll invite Aang over when he feels better. I'll do whatever it takes to make them safe."

Hakoda shut his eyes, heaving a deep breath before looking at me again. "They could never be watched over every second. They need to learn to protect themselves," he said.

I nodded, looking at the floor as my mind searched for answers. "I know."

"Suiya, I'm leaving for the Northern Water Tribe."