Olivia watches them, silently. The conversation has temporarily lulled, as both of the other women at the table are on their third drinks. The waitress approaches. Olivia, looks away.
"Can I get you ladies another drink?"
"No, thank you," Alex answers for the three of them, well aware that any more alcohol would lead to disaster. The waitress nods, and walks away. Alexandra looks across the table, at Olivia. Between them, on the table, is a bowl of pretzels. Olivia stares at the table, unwilling to make eye contact. Alex elbows Casey.
"Liv?" Casey says softly.
"Hm?" She responds.
"Are you going to talk to us?" Alexandra wonders.
"I don't know what to say," she admits.
"You could start with what happened, when you saw Elliot," Casey suggests.
Olivia doesn't say anything.
Casey turns to Alexandra, "Are you going to address the elephant in the room, or should I?"
Alex says nothing, noticing that Casey's cheeks are bright red. Casey clams up.
"Why are the two of you so curious, anyway? It doesn't matter," Olivia tells them.
"Secrets, aren't good, for anyone," Alex reminds her.
"Everyone has secrets," Olivia retorts.
"I know," Alex answers, empathetically.
Olivia's mind drifts from the conversation.
August 28th-
She stands outside her door. He looks at her, his eyes begging her to let him in. She turns, and unlocks the door. He freezes, before entering the threshold.
"You should go," she tells him.
"I know."
Her breath hitches, and she can't tell him to leave, again. One look in his blue eyes, after so much time apart, she's no longer in control of her emotions.
She gets the feeling that she's being stared up. She looks up, and finds Alex, and Casey looking at her, waiting.
"What?" Olivia asks.
"You slept with him, didn't you?" Casey quizzes, aloud.
August 28th-
He kisses her. For a moment, her brain screams at her, reminding her that this is wrong. She pulls away. She looks at him.
"We shouldn't do this," she points out.
"I love you," he whispers into her ear, with his hand in her hair, at the base of her skull.
She tries to return her thoughts to reality. She looks at Casey, and realizes that she still hasn't answered. She can find the words to confirm that she has. She just gives a simple nod.
"I know what you're thinking, but you're wrong," Casey chimes in.
Olivia looks at her, questioningly.
"You're feeling guilty," Alex adds.
Olivia nods, "Of course I am."
"You are not the reason his marriage didn't work," Casey reassures her.
"That isn't entirely true," Alex argues, "His marriage didn't work, because he gave up. It didn't work, because he was," she corrects herself, "is a cheater. It also didn't work, because he was in love with his partner."
Casey counters, "The papers were filed in February. Kathy didn't want to have to be with someone, who couldn't be faithful to her."
Alex shakes her head, "He couldn't be faithful, because he wanted to be with Olivia. He always has. Everyone knows that."
Casey exhales, "He chose to be unfaithful with other people."
"It doesn't matter why, or how, does it?" Alex poses the question.
Casey shakes her head, "No. Olivia wasn't to blame."
"Wasn't I?" Olivia wonders.
"That marriage was over a long time ago, and it wasn't your fault. A marriage is between to people. One who wanted to be in it, and one who didn't," Alex tells her.
"I made a mistake," Olivia admits.
"It's ok," Casey promises.
Olivia huffs, "No, it's not. For so many years, I wondered. I questioned everything. I thought that it was what I wanted. I felt I was being punished, and I didn't know why. It wasn't worth it. I didn't want it. I just thought that I did, because I couldn't have it. It's too much. I feel guilty. I don't want to be with him."
"He still wants you," Casey relays.
"I know. He calls, but I never answer. I never return his calls."
"He was your partner for over a decade," Alexandra points out.
"I never should have wanted anything more. I don't want anything more," Olivia reveals.
"But?" Casey raises an eyebrow.
"The things that you want, or think that you do, they never turn out the way that you plan. You wait your whole life for something to happen, and when they do, it's not at all what you expected," Olivia answers.
"So what are you going to do?" Casey asks.
"You both knew about the affairs. Neither of you seemed surprised. How long had you known? Why didn't you tell me?" Olivia responds, with a question.
They avoid eye contact. Casey falls silent. Alex is the first to speak up.
"I have known for a long time. Ten years, I guess. It is not as if he confided in me, but, I always had the feeling, that he wasn't faithful to Kathy. He was just really good at covering his tracks," Alex explains.
"I suspected, for a long time. I never had any proof..." Casey trails off.
"Until you decided to be his divorce lawyer?" Olivia supplies.
Casey shakes her head, "It was before that."
"When?" Olivia queries.
Alex turns to Casey, "We should tell her," she says, in a hushed tone.
"Tell me what?"
"Did you tell him?" Casey inquires, trying to divert Olivia's attention.
"That you're pregnant," Casey maintains eye contact.
"I never said that I was," Olivia reminds her.
"So, you're not going to tell him, and you're not ready to tell us, either?" Casey surmises.
"Do you really think that is plausible, at my age?"
"It's not impossible," Casey furrows her eyebrows.
"Knowing what I do," Alex begins, "I do not think that it is that unlikely."