It was the same feeling that had brought Shepard to unconsciousness that woke him up: A great deal of pain. His return to reality was much more violent and sudden this time around as he immediately noticed that he was being tended to by a nurse with medi-gel. He was on the inside of a rapidly moving Mako, lying in a bed, strapped to it, actually, and was surrounded by Alliance soldiers.
"Commander! Easy, now!", the nurse cried out in surprise, turning every soldier's attention to Shepard, "How are you feeling?"
"Been… better. What's going on? What happened?", Shepard barely managed to ask as he didn't even have the strength to pinch himself to make sure this was not a dream again.
"Admiral Anderson will brief you once we reach the bunker", the nurse replied, "But for now I want you to relax. You've lost a lot of blood."
"What about… Liara and Garrus? Are they all right?", Shepard continued with his questions, hearing the nurse but not really listening to her, "What happened to Harbinger?"
"Easy, I said!", the nurse scolded the Commander, "The Admiral will explain everything once we get there!"
"Why... don't you tell me yourself? I just want to know what's going on!", Shepard replied, annoyed, not budging at all.
"You were saved by the geth, Commander", one of the soldiers finally spoke up, "Several fighters sacrificed themselves to distract Harbinger long enough to evacuate you. While he was disoriented, one of our cruisers managed to get a lock on his position and launched an orbital bombardment. That softened Harbinger up enough to make him retreat to the Citadel."
"With that in mind, the Reapers have become more disorganized", continued another one of the soldiers on the Mako, "But there's word from Eden Prime that reinforcements are on their way. We need to get the Crucible operational as fast as possible."
"Did you find any other survivors?", Shepard asked with anxiety.
"We don't know. Several squads were sent to your position after Harbinger was out of the way", replied the soldier, "But proper radio communication has not been our ally today."
Shepard had a hard time trying to piece everything together. He was still in shock from what he'd seen during his dream. Destroying all synthetic life to defeat the Reapers had never been his plan, but after hearing what the Catalyst had to say, he had even managed to accept death and make his peace with it. Now that he was still definitely alive, and the war still going on, Shepard had to do his best to hurt the Reapers where it hurts. First, though, he had to make sure that his whole team is intact and standing beside him…
The battle could clearly be heard outside, though it wasn't as active as it had been before the run to the beam: the two sides were at a stalemate and were mostly trying to regroup. The Mako began to slow down a bit, and as the nurse gave Shepard a nod and unstrapped him, he struggled to get back on his feet. At least the bleeding had been mollified after he had received a fair amount of medi-gel to boost him up. The soldiers walked out the Mako first, and Shepard soon followed. They had stopped at the building where he had talked with his squadmates before the attack, the last real chance he had to savour his friendship with them. There were countless of soldiers being treated by doctors in a hectic fashion. The Turians and Krogan were helping each other recover whatever equipment was left, and there was a group that mourned the dead. The heavy toll of the war was now felt like it never had before as people were trying to call their friends and loved ones, wanting to know whether they were all right, and sometimes bursting into tears when they eventually hear the ugly truth. Shepard took a moment to remember Mordin and Thane's sacrifices and Ashley's death on Virmire. What he feared the most right now was not the Reapers or even Earth's fate; he feared that within minutes he could possibly hear names of more who hadn't made it. Names of those who were close to him.
Limping towards the command center, Shepard went through the door, looking at the countless soldiers that had piled up to take a breath until the next attack. The night was still as eerie as it had been during Shepard's descent to Earth, which already felt like weeks ago. He was spared the trouble of looking for anyone from his squad when he could make out Anderson's voice calling his name in relief. He was walking alongside Major Coats, who had apparently informed him of what had happened, to Shepard.
"Shepard! Are you all right? We thought you had died!", Anderson nearly yelled, already helping Shepard up the stairs to the command center where the Admiral had briefed him before; the same thing he was about to do now.
"Anderson!", Shepard coughed from the pain, "You didn't make it to the beam by any chance?"
"What? Me? The beam?", Anderson replied, completely taken aback, "No, I was here, coordinating the attack. Nobody made it to the beam. Nobody could even after the geth attacked Harbinger. The Reapers have apparently deployed a mass effect field preventing anyone from accessing the beam."
"Are you sure?", Shepard asked indignantly.
"Yes. Heavy weapons don't seem to be working. As far as we could understand from its design, the beam now only keeps the Citadel docked above Earth", Anderson began explaining as he sat behind the desk filled with tactical computers and Shepard sat on the opposite side, "Even if you had made it to the beam, you would have been pushed back. Quite frankly, I don't know why Harbinger came there in the first place."
"Did you find anybody else alive?", Shepard asked, tired of asking the question, but desperate to know the answer.
"Ah…", Anderson said, seemingly uncomfortable with answering the question, purposefully avoiding Shepard's gaze, "We did, Shepard. We found a couple of soldiers, along with Liara and Garrus. They have a pulse, but…"
"But?"
"But there's something wrong with them. They're unconscious, and nothing seems to wake them up", Anderson sighed.
"What? Where are they?", Shepard asked, standing up from the bench in bewilderment, ready to go to wherever they were being kept.
"We've set up a med bay in the building across. Last I heard, that's where they were sent", Anderson replied, and as soon as Shepard started limping towards the door, he yelled, "Shepard! Wait a second, there's nothing you can do to help them, I need you here!"
"I can't just leave them there! I have to see them!", Shepard fought back.
"I know it's hard, but I really need your help, Shepard. We need to figure out our next move. The war is far from over, and I have questions of my own", the Admiral pleaded in earnest, already up on his feet.
Just the mere thought of Liara and Garrus not making it through was much more painful than any of Shepard's countless wounds that he had been enduring since he woke up as not even the medi-gel was enough to completely heal them. He couldn't imagine life without Liara, the woman he loved and the one he'd decided to spent the rest of his life with, or Garrus, his best friend that has always been there for him, a friend who'd always follow him to hell and back. The thought that they could be no longer alive because he screwed up was maddening, but he couldn't turn down Anderson's need for help, especially at a time like this.
"What do you need me to do?", Shepard reluctantly gave in.
"Things have been strangely quiet after your assault on the beam. Almost too quiet", Anderson explained as he showed a graphic illustration of the beam's tactical location on the holographic map of the computer in front of his desk, "I think we've caught the Reapers at a disadvantage, at last. I can't believe I'm saying this, but we owe the geth a great deal; Harbinger retreating was a crucial blow to the Reapers. We have to capitalize on the situation."
"As far as I know, we don't have much time. Reinforcements are coming from Eden Prime", Shepard informed.
"Yes, I know. That's why we have to use the opportunity to fire up the Crucible and see what it does. We're taking the battle back to space", Anderson replied, changing the holographic image with a layout of the Reaper fleet above, "Most of the Reapers are positioned around the Citadel, and even though they're disorganized, attacking them head on will result in a lot of casualties."
"No, that's too risky", Shepard said, "There has to be a better way. We should use the Normandy. We can have it distract them."
"That's dangerous, as well, Shepard", Anderson warned, "The Normandy's stealth drive will only work for a short period of time. The Reapers will surely return fire as soon as they're attacked."
"One way or another, we have to retake control of the Citadel", Shepard persevered with his tactical advice, "And we can't do it conventionally, we both know that. We could launch a squadron of fighters to accompany the Normandy, confusing the Reapers and making them easy prey for the battleships and the Destiny Ascension."
"You know that there's a great risk of friendly fire", Anderson replied, "But it might be the only chance we've got. The geth fleet has mostly been destroyed, but their sacrifice was not in vain. There's several quarian life ships that are helping out with repairs. But with the Turian fleet combined with ours, as well as the Destiny Ascension, we might just be able to succeed."
"Anderson, what about Cerberus? The Illusive Man? Have you encountered them?", Shepard asked, recalling the dream sequence that he had seen not long before.
"No, you know more on this matter than I do", Anderson shrugged, "I have no idea what the Illusive Man is planning and quite frankly, I don't care what his schemes are. Our goal is the Reapers."
"He was very passionate about controlling them", Shepard stated, remembering what he had seen while unconscious.
"You and I both know that there's only one way we stop the Reapers once and for all: destroying them. The Crucible was built from cycle to cycle for a reason; it's the key to our success. We can't back out now", Anderson confidently replied, visibly fed up with being outsmarted by the Reapers time after time again.
"And that's what we're going to do, Anderson", Shepard assured, "And I think this plan is all we've got. And I want to be on board the Normandy when we attack. I've come this way and I want to see it through, and I won't let a lone wound stop me."
"I know you wouldn't have it any other way", Anderson chuckled. His radio suddenly chimed, and he answered, "Yes? What? Are you certain?", Anderson said as he looked worriedly at Shepard, almost remorseful, "That bad? Quarantined?"
"Is this about Liara and Garrus?", Shepard asked timidly, and seeing Anderson's blank stare in return, he knew it was true. Not looking back, he immediately stood up and started going down the stairs as fast as he could.
"Shepard!", Anderson called, making the Commander look back to the Admiral for a second, "I'm… I'm sorry."
Shepard continued striding through the stairs. He was in pain, but he didn't care. He saw the stares he got from the soldiers around him, as well as the civillians that had come to see them, but he tried to remain oblivious. Nobody was stopping him from going to the med bay this time.