A/N WOW! I had no idea you all would want to read this so much! Sorry if this seems repetetive of the other stories but it will be different. Thank you to AnGeL BaBii, RKO-luver, coors1977, JohnCenasgurl and the-punk-girl-for-life! Don't make Randy sing! Enjoy-Kiera

2. Things In My Head

Alex sat in the bath for a long time, she kept refilling it with water so hot it made her legs pink. She used every body scrub and wash within reach and washed her hair three times. She wasn't sure why. Downstairs she could hear John doing something and he shouted up for her twice, and twice she promised she would be down in a few minutes. Eventually there was a knock at the bathroom door and when John walked in she brought her knees up to her chest.

"Are you ok?" he asked, kneeling next to the tub.

"Fine. Why?"

"You've been in the bath for nearly an hour."

"I'm really dirty." She said before adding. "Can you go please?"

"Where?"

"Out. Downstairs, I feel uncomfortable."

He frowned, almost as though he didn't understand her at first before nodding and leaving quietly. Alex put her head on her knees and let out a deep sigh. She knew why John was doing all this, sex, plain and simple. He had to be annoyed, by his own admission he hadn't been with anyone in fourteen months and now he had her back, why wait? Alex felt wrong about it though and she didn't know why.

Guilt

There it was, her ever annoying inner voice. Just what she needed.

Hey! I'm here to help! It's guilt. You feel guilty for leaving Randy and if you don't sleep with John then it's like you haven't cemented the relationship.

That's not it, she thought back. It's just new, again.

Alex it's just sex! It never changed the world and it never will!

But it's new!

But it's not.

How do I know that?

Think about it! You've been married! No one gets married and stays a virgin! Now get out the bath, go downstairs and do something!

Alex did as she was told.

John was setting the table when Alex appeared behind him, her robe was sticking to her and her hair was wet. He looked over his shoulder at her.

"Hey, everything will be ready soon so you should go get dressed."

She took a deep breath, her inner voice reminding her that it was nothing. It was just normal and wasn't that what she wanted? But Alex couldn't move, her feet where stuck to the floor. Why was this so hard for her to do? She ran back upstairs but didn't get dressed, instead she picked up the phone. Randy answered after four rings.

"Hello,"

The words where there in her throat, but wouldn't actually move from there. They where stuck.

"Hello,"

She was trying to force herself to say something. Randy hung up and so did she. Alex put her face her hands, she felt stupid. She hadn't even been aware that John had been shouting her until he was in front of her.

"Aren't you coming down?" he asked.

"No, I'm going to bed. I don't feel well."

He nodded and got up, leaving Alex to crawl into bed still wet from the bath. He went downstairs and began cleaning the table, blowing out the candles and getting rid of the food. John put the ring box away.