As Lucas drove the familiar streets for the first time in over a year, he felt a sense of home. He loved that he was back, but he hated that he wouldn't be staying for a little bit of time. His mom was moving back for good, so he would eventually have home to return to, if he ever made it back. He was already dressed to leave, and he'd said goodbye to his mom and baby sister, since she was moving her stuff tomorrow. He just wanted to spend at least an hour in Tree Hill to say goodbye.
As soon as Lucas saw the Rivercourt, he asked the driver of the cab to let him out. He would walk from there; he was going to have to get used to it anyway. He was juts supposed to drive through town, saying silent goodbye's to all the places he loved as he was on his way to the bus station, but, as always, the familiar court held a familiar pull. He grabbed his bag out of the cab and decided he was walking to the bus station. He stayed there for at least half an hour, wishing that he had a basketball, before moving on. As he passes what used to be his mom's Café, and still would be when she moved back, he decided to step inside.
It was the nineteenth day in July, and Peyton was well aware that Lucas's birthday had been two days ago, but she hadn't talked to him in a year, since his last birthday, in fact, because he had left right after his party. He'd moved right out of her life. She'd tried to move on, which, incidentally, was why she was dating Jake, because she honestly didn't think she'd see him again, and what had happened before he left was clear indication that he didn't want her like that. So she'd settled for Jake, hoping he could heal her broken heart.
What she didn't expect, was to see Lucas walk into the Café, in army greens, two days after his eighteenth birthday. Peyton had been picking up part time shifts all school year around cheerleading practice, and then softball-yes, she had become a cheerleader, and she'd also formed a friendship with Brooke, which she had thought would never happen-since before she'd even turned sixteen, because she had to find a way to distract herself, with Lucas gone. She had begged Deb, who was running the Café in Karen's absence, for a job. Since summer had started, she had been at the Café full time, though Deb insisted that she didn't work a full time shift, so she spent half the time drawing, and listening to her iPod, und working, when the Café was shorthanded.
When he walked in, she was working, and she immediately ran into the back. Deb, noticing her frantic expression, asked her what was wrong. She did nothing but jab a finger towards the front of the building. Deb peered through a window in the door and, upon spotting Lucas, nodded understandingly. Peyton had confessed everything that had happened between her and Lucas, but that didn't make Deb sympathetic. She pushed the young teenager out there, and she forced her to take his order.
As soon as Peyton emerged from the back, Lucas spotted her, and his breath caught in his throat, just the way it used to. He had been hoping to see her, especially since he might never get the chance to again. He knew the feelings were still there. No matter how much he'd tried to ignore him over the past year, he knew that he was, and would always be, in love with Peyton Sawyer. That fact was even more reinforced as he saw her again. He'd always thought she was beautiful, but in their year apart, she had definitely grown up. She was no longer an awkward teen; she had filled out, and looked more like a young woman. She was gorgeous now, even more so than before.
It was true; she did look different, though. Her hair was cut shorter than he'd ever seen it, to just past her jaw line, and it was straight. Never before in her life had Peyton had straight hair. He wondered where the new look had come from. He also noticed a bow in her hair, holding part of the right side back. It was red plaid, and matched her pleated mini-skirt. She was also wearing one of her classic band tees, though his one much tighter than the ones she used to wear. On her feet were her classic black Converse, so it was nice to know at least one thing hadn't changed.
As she looked him over she could also tell how much had changed. His hair was no longer long enough to run his fingers through, which had been a habit of his. Now it was shaved close to his head. The army greens made him look like a completely different person, too. It was easy to tell he wasn't the same person she once knew, but she still loved him, if the fluttering of her heart was any indication. He was nervous, she could tell, and he'd never been one to be nervous before, at least, not with her. "Happy belated birthday!" she said, sending him a smile as he walked up. The closer she got, the happier she was to see him. Suddenly it didn't matter anymore, what had happened between them, or how long it had been since they'd talked. He was here now, and that was what mattered.
Once he ordered she could resist no longer, she gave him a hug before going back to get his food. She just needed to touch him, to get close enough to smell him. She wanted to know if he still smelled the same. He did. When she got back to the booth, he offered her the seat opposite him. "Would you mind sitting down for a while. I want to talk to you, catch up. Things have been kind of rough lately, not that they weren't last year as well," he said, gesturing to the other side of the booth, hoping she'd take him up on her offer.
Biting her lip, a habit she still hadn't managed to break, Peyton looked around the Café. It was still kind of full from the breakfast rush. She did get off in an hour though. She contemplated for a while, before making a decision. "I'd really love to, Luke, but I have to work," she started, and his face fell. "I'm off in an hour, though, and I have an idea of where we can go," she said, sending him another smile as he beamed back at her. Then she had to hurry off and take someone else's order, so he was left alone to finish his breakfast.
True to her word, exactly an hour later, Peyton, minus the apron, but plus a leather jacket, showed up at his table, ready to go. "Come on, Lucas. I'll even let you ride in my car," she said with a huge grin as she thought about the car she'd gotten for her sixteenth birthday. "It was only a guilt gift, I'm certain, and it's kind of old, but I love it," she said, leading him outside, to her vintage Comet. It was probably older than her, but it was black, and convertible, and she couldn't have loved any car more. She glanced over at him as she got in the drivers seat. "You getting in, or what?" she asked, removing a pair of sunglasses from the glove compartment and sliding them on her face as she looked at him expectantly.
Surprised by her car, but moreso by her ability to drive-she'd always said she wouldn't get a license because she would always have Lucas or her brother drive her around-he had just stared at her in the car for a moment. Then he snapped out of his stupor, and got in the passenger side of her car. Normally, he would probably insist on driving, but with her, the passenger seat had never looked better. With Brooke, he had mostly driver her car when they went somewhere together, or they just went in his truck, but with Peyton, he didn't much mind sitting in the passenger seat. "I thought you were never going to drive?" he asked, cocking an eyebrow at her as he turned his head to look at her.
Putting the car in reverse and pulling out of the parking place, she ignored his question for so long, that he thought she would never answer. She turned her radio on, and put one of his favorite CDs in, and kept her eyes on the road, at least, he thought. He didn't know she was shooting glances at him beneath her sunglasses. "Well, like I said, the car was birthday gift, albeit one given out of guilt and besides, Nathan is not the most reliable person, especially for rides. You left, so I kind of had to find a way to drive on my own," she said with a shrug, as she pulled in the driveway of her house. "I have to change to go where were going, and when we're on the way, you can tell me all about your army gear, and what brought that on," she said, noticing his look as she hopped out of the car and ran up to her house.
Trailing after her, Lucas wasn't sure he was looking forward to that conversation. What could he do, though? He had known when inviting her to sit down that it would come sometime. Actually, if he was being honest, he had known coming into Tree Hill that the conversation would be coming. He kind of welcomed it, really. He had wanted to talk to Peyton since the day he left Tree Hill, and now he was going to get the chance, on the day he was leaving again. He wasn't going to tell her that he loved her, or that he was in love with her, rather. He would tell her loved her, because that was true as well, but he would keep the fact that he was in love with his ex-best friends little sister to his self, like he had for over a year.
The brunet was home, but Peyton suspected that was because their father-well, his father-was coming home the next day, and that meant he would spend as much time as possible out of the house, which Peyton planned to do to, considering what had happened this school year. She had wanted so badly to call Lucas and tell him while it was all going down, but she just couldn't bring herself to pick up the phone, and it was definitely too much to put in an email. So she didn't, and she rarely talked to Nathan anymore, because he'd become even more of a jackass.
That was partially why she'd gotten so close to Brooke, because she needed someone to talk to. Gigi and Mouth weren't dating anymore. He was now seeing a girl who had just graduated, named Erica Marsh. Peyton didn't feel close enough to any of her friends from the Rivercourt to talk to them about it, but, for some reason, she felt close enough to Brooke, who wasn't really as bad as Peyton had once thought. In fact, the girl had become her best friend, which surprised no one more than Peyton.
Ignoring her brother, who still hated Lucas for sleeping with his sister, even if he wasn't on talking terms with his sister, Peyton went up to her room, and got dressed. She pulled off the clothes she had worn to work, which smelled good, but they smelled like food, and she did not want to smell like food when hanging out with Lucas. She pulled on her hunter green bikini, then, in honor of his army greens, she pulled on a green camouflage mini-skirt and a black wife beater, which clung tightly to her. She slid her feet back into her Converse, without socks, and took the red plaid bow out of her hair, putting in a black one instead. She grabbed a different bag and threw a few beach towels in it, as well as the stuff from the purse she had been using, and then she was ready to go.
When she emerged from the house, Lucas felt his jaw hit the floor of her car. That may have been an exaggeration, but it didn't feel like it to him. He got a really good look at her legs, for the first time that day, and they were still a little chickeny, but they were tanned-as was the rest of her body-like she'd spent every day so far this summer in the sunlight, which she had, really. With Brooke as a best friend you spent all your time tanning in the sun, or shopping, and Peyton hated to shop, so tanning it was. He honestly couldn't believe he had never noticed how hot she was before this. Sure, he had always thought her beautiful, but now she was hot.
Noticing the way he was staring at her, she smirked as she approached the car. "Close your mouth, before you start catching bugs," she said as she got in her car. She knew she was hot now in a way she hadn't been before. She'd grown up a lot in a year, developed, and now she had a lot more confidence than she used to. Again, with Brooke as a best friend, it was hard not to. Brooke was a big reason for all the change in Peyton, but it was also part of growing up. She had matured a lot in a year, but she had also become a lot more jaded. It was sort of a win-lose situation, but one she had been forced into nonetheless.
Closing his mouth quickly, Lucas stammered for a moment before clearing his throat and trying again. "You look nice, Peyt," he said, slipping back into the use of the nickname only he called her. She had to admit, she hadn't let anyone else call her that. It was the name Lucas and Lucas alone could call her. Anyone else and it just didn't sound the same. She would know, because Jake tried to call her that, and she had immediately said no. She was glad that he still called her that, and, really, Lucas was kind of glad that she still allowed him to call her that.
Pulling up to the beach, Peyton looked over at Lucas. He just shrugged, a 'if we must' look on his face and then followed her out of the car and to the beach. She spread out her towels and the blanket she had in the back of her Comet, and then stripped off her skirt and tank top before laying down. He just stared. Peyton had her glasses on, but she was looking right at him as he stared at her for a long moment. "You know, Scott," she said, startling him because he thought she wasn't looking at him. "You'd think you've never seen a girl in a bikini before," she finished with a smirk, though she was inwardly pleased, because it was the second time she'd caught him staring at her, today.
The two of them lay on the beach and talked about how their lives had been the past year. He admitted that he was going into the army, for at least six years, and she admitted she didn't want him to go, but she would support him. She also said she missed him, and then she told him what had happened to her. "So, apparently, I'm adopted. After Nathan, his parents couldn't have any more, and my birth mother was a crack head, who couldn't take care of herself, much less a baby, so she gave up her child, and Larry and Anna were the good home she gave me too," she said, bitterly as she thought back to the day Ellie had showed up on her doorstep, claiming to be her mother.
After she had slammed the door in Ellie's face, and ignored her for a while, she confronted the man she believed to be her father, and he had confirmed Ellie's story. Peyton still had not talked to the woman, because she chose to live in denial, where she was actually belonged to the family she lived with. "You'll always belong with them, Peyton. Larry will always be your father, and Anna will always be your mother. Nathan will also always be your brother. Just not by blood. They raised you, though, and loved you, and that's what a family means. I mean, look at me and Keith. He may not have biologically been my father, but he's the man I call my father to this day, because he was there for me in ways Dan never was, or wanted to be," he said when she finished.
That did make her feel better, actually, a lot better. He always knew the right things to say, and she loved that about him. He continued on to tell her that even if she did seek out a relationship with Ellie, that wouldn't mean she was betraying Anna. He said Anna would want her to have a relationship with her real mother, especially since Anna couldn't be there for her. Peyton, once he finished speaking, rolled onto her side and laid her head on Lucas's chest. "You always know the right things to say, Scott. Thanks for always making me feel better," she said into his chest, too embarrassed to look up at him.
The pair of blondes continued to lay like that for the rest of the day, until Lucas really had to get up and catch the bus so he wouldn't miss his plane. He had called and rescheduled his morning flight for an evening flight, but he couldn't stay any longer because he had to be in California by the morning. She insisted on driving him to the airport, so she could get more time with him before they had to say goodbye yet again. She hated that she had to say goodbye so shortly after getting him back, but he had to go. He had already signed up, and if he went AWOL he could be put in jail. She didn't want that.
At the airport, she stood outside security to say goodbye. Neither of them had confessed their feelings, but she had told him that she had a boyfriend. He had felt his heart break even more at that, and, unbeknownst to him, so did hers. "Hey, I know you have a boyfriend and all, but do you think I can write to you? I've got no one but my mom to send a letter to. Do you mind if I send some back here to you?" he asked, honestly unsure of what she was going to say.
Rolling her eyes, she launched herself into his arms for a hug. That was all the answer he needed, and it felt really good to hold her in his arms again. It felt really good for her to be in his arms again. She hated that it was possibly the last time. She wouldn't let her thoughts dwell there, though. She'd focus on the positive. "Of course you can, goof. You know my address," she said as he set her back on her feet, a smile playing on her lips, despite the longing she felt to be back in his arms. The final boarding call for his flight was called, and he turned to go, after one more hug. She waved at him and watched the love of her life walk away from her, again.
For months the letters came, from California, and then Afghanistan. She started her junior year of high school, dating Jake, but writing to Lucas. They wrote about the most random things in their letters, but they wrote nearly every day. Peyton found time, even if she had to stay up late into the night, just so she could read his letters and write a reply. Eventually, once he was out of boot camp, the letters came with more time in between, but she still wrote to him every single day. She wanted him to have something to read, even when he didn't have time to write. Besides, she hoped he kept every letter from her, the way she kept his, in the drawer, where she still kept the note on which she wrote the words 'I love you' to him.
It wasn't until the beginning of autumn that she confessed her true feelings, no holds barred, to him in a letter. She was surprised, due to the fact that it was at least two weeks before she received a letter in response to that one, that he felt the same way. She knew then that she had to break up with Jake, and be honest to everyone about her feelings for the blond in Afghanistan. Brooke supported her, but asked why she didn't keep seeing Jake. It wasn't like Lucas had to know, Brooke had said. Peyton just rolled her eyes and said that she wasn't Brooke and couldn't play Jake like that. Brooke didn't even take offense, because it was the truth.
Only mildly surprised, Nathan did get angry. He said that she shouldn't wait around for someone who might not even come home, and he added that Lucas was too old for her. Her friends from the Rivercourt, whom she made more time for now that Brooke was gone and she broke up with Jake-though she did still pick up shifts at Karen's Café, though most of the time she spent there was with Lily, who was still the cutest little girl Peyton had ever seen. She had started walking and talking-said that it was about time she was honest with him, and though they didn't think it was fair to her to wait for him, it was her decision. Mouth had started dating a girl named Shelley, since Erica had ditched him when the school year started.
The year continued, and Peyton played softball in the fall, and continued to talk to her biological mom, and write to Lucas everyday. It had taken a while, but she had finally formed a relationship with Ellie. The reason it hadn't been as smooth as she would hope was because she had discovered that Ellie had breast cancer. Ellie swore up and down that she was in remission, but Peyton wasn't sure she believed her. Either way, she wanted to spend time with her real mom, so she did, and wrote to Lucas about it after every day spent with her. Lucas was smug in his replies, and repeatedly told her that he has 'told her so.'
When the summer came, and Nathan came home from his first year of college going on about a girl he had just met there less than a month ago, Peyton couldn't believe it. She could tell Nathan was falling for this girl, Haley, and, though he adamantly denied it, this would be the girl who changed her brother. She bet Lucas, after explaining how head over heels her brother was, that Nathan would bring her home for Christmas break. Lucas replied a week later that it would be summer break next year, because the girl couldn't possibly change him that fast. Haley didn't seem Nathan's type from what he had told her, and he insisted he was only interested in her because she was playing hard to get, but she noticed that Nathan didn't have one summer fling all summer, and that said a lot more to her than anything else he said or did.
Also during that summer, Brooke couldn't come home. She was in design school in New York, but she was already starting her own clothing line, and she couldn't spare the time off, according to her mother. Brooke promised she would come home for Christmas break, but she did, during a long phone conversation, confess to Peyton that she had met a guy, and she really liked him. They weren't anything yet, but Brooke was not planning for it to stay that way for long. Peyton was glad because, except for a few months in her senior year when she dated a guy named Chase, she hadn't seen anyone since Lucas. Brooke insisted that she was over Lucas, but Peyton would like to have the proof of that in the form of Brooke dating someone else. She only hoped this Julian guy wouldn't break her best friend's heart.
At the start of her senior year, Peyton got a little bit busier due to being captain of the cheerleading squad. She still made time to write to Lucas every day, sometimes mailing him copies of her drawings, since he had been bugging her about them for years, really, and now she didn't have to feel embarrassed about them. He repeatedly told her not to worry, and said that when things began to get rough, he would remember that day on the beach, and how perfect it had been. He would then close her eyes and picture her smile, and everything would be okay, at least for a few moments. She was incredibly pleased by that, because she often found herself remembering the day at the beach while she was sitting in a boring class, or trying to focus on her homework.
At the Café one day, she was holding Lily, because she had already finished her shift. She loved the little girl like her own little sister, and Karen had become like a, well, third mom to her, even more than she'd been before. Karen had started seeing a man named Andy, which Peyton didn't tell Lucas about, because that was Karen's job, so Peyton found herself babysitting the two year old quite often, which was okay, since her dad was sill rarely home, and Nathan had gone back to Duke, where he had officially started dating Haley James-it took a while for that name to click, but Peyton finally realized that the woman had been a rock star for a brief period of time, and had even toured with the Wreckers and a guy named Chris Keller.
Deciding impulsively to go see Ellie because she hadn't talked to her in a few days, Peyton asked if it was okay if she took off early. Karen told her of course it was, and it would be even if she hadn't finished her shift already. When Peyton mentioned her plans to go to her mom's house a few cities away for the weekend, Karen said she didn't have to ask, it wasn't like she couldn't spend time with Andy with Lily there. So Peyton left the Café and got in her Comet, making the couple hour drive to her mom's house. She had yet to see it, because Ellie usually came to see her, but Peyton thought it was time. She was actually glad, in a horrified way that she'd decided to go, because otherwise it might have been a long time before anyone discovered her dead body.
The letter to Lucas was long and a little tear-smudged after that incident. It took her a while to get over finding her second mom dead, and she didn't really, but she did start living again, which Lucas had to try to convince her to do in quite a few letters. Her letter writing slowed down a bit while she was wallowing in her pain, but when she decided to move on, she went right back to writing him every day, and he was glad. He had missed her letters, because they really did brighten his day every time he got one. He really couldn't wait for the day when they could just be together, because they hadn't gotten the chance to do that yet.
In Tree Hill, Peyton was getting ready for Christmas, when her brother was coming home. He had heard that her mom had died, but he hadn't been able to get away from school except for a weekend for the funeral. He was, in fact, bringing Haley, and Peyton repeatedly wrote in her letters that she had 'told him so.' Lucas replied that he wasn't there, so he couldn't really know for sure. Peyton said that a bet was a bet, and when he got back, he would have to do whatever she wanted him to do, for a week, as had been the deal. A week later, in his response, he told her that he would have to live with that.
For Christmas, Peyton decorated her house. She had even got a tree, despite the fact that Karen had invited Larry, Peyton, Nathan and Haley over for Christmas. It was Karen's second Christmas without Lucas, but her first with Andy, and she wasn't sure how it would go. Lily, already nearing two and a half, was extremely excited for the presents this year. Peyton was amazed every time she saw the little girl at how much she had grown, and how well she learned. Lucas's little sister was often the focus of her letters to him. Lucas loved to read about his little sister, all her firsts, because he wasn't getting to see anymore himself. He also asked Peyton to write a very detailed letter of their Christmas, since he was missing it.
At the last minute, Brooke arrived, with Julian in tow, only because she had promised Peyton she'd be home for Christmas and she didn't want to leave her boyfriend behind. Karen said that Brooke and Julian could come to, because she also looked at Brooke as a daughter, seeing as her son was dating her for so long. Peyton got to spend one-on-one time with both Julian and Haley, so she could make sure they were right for her best friend and brother respectively. Personally she thought Julian was an asshole, but she saw how happy he made Brooke. As for Haley, she liked her a lot, and they got along well. She also loved how the woman had changed her asshole of a brother into a pretty okay guy.
Christmas was a great day. All of them had a good time, talking and laughing. The only thing missing was Lucas. Luckily, he was due for a phone call home, and he chose to use it on Christmas. When Karen answered the phone, and heard her son's voice, she nearly dropped it, and let out a shriek that alarmed everyone in the whole house. Everyone ran into the kitchen, where she was, but no one faster than Andy and Peyton. Since Lily was in there with Karen as she cooked, they assumed something horrible had happened to the little girl they both loved.
Everyone who knew him was pleasantly surprised, no one more than Peyton. Karen and then Lily talked to Lucas, and then Brooke talked to him for a few minutes. Peyton wanted to be last because she knew she would be the longest on the phone. She took the cordless out to the porch and talked to him for a long time, going on and on, about everything that crossed her mind. Lucas didn't talk as much, because there wasn't much he wanted to say about where he was, but also because he loved just listening to her talk.
When he had to get off they were both disappointed, but she assured him that she loved him and would wait forever for him, and he returned the sentiment before he had to hang up. Once the connection ended, Peyton allowed a few tears to fall down her cheeks. She loved talking to him, but she wanted to be with him, to touch him, to feel him against her. Even to just hold his hand. She hated the fact that when they finally got it together, he was on another continent. She wished they could have gotten it together before he left Tree Hill. Maybe then he wouldn't have joined the army.
Of course, Peyton expected someone to come out to check on her, but she didn't expect it to be her brother, who had been against her relationship with Lucas from the start. He held her for a few minutes, letting her rest her head on his shoulder, and cry if she needed to. "I'm sorry Peyton, I really am. I know I don't approve of you with my best friend, because he's too old for you, but if you love him, you can't help it, and I can't stop it, even if I wish I could. Anyway, I'm sorry you have to go through this," he said while he rubbed her back the way their mom used to.
Surprised, Peyton lifted her head of his shoulder to look at him in amazement. She asked when he became so wise. He just smirked at her and looked through the window, into the house, where he could see Haley sitting in the living room. That was when Peyton realized the answer. He answered anyway, though. "When Haley came into my life. Before her, I didn't know what love is. Now I do, and I wish I'd met her a long time ago. She's changed me, for the better, and I hope I never do anything stupid enough to lose her," he paused for a moment, taking his eyes off Haley to look at his sister. "If you feel for Lucas even half of what I feel for that woman in there, then who am I to stand in the way?" he asked.
His words really made her feel better than he realized. They sat for another couple minutes before Karen came outside and told them it was time for dinner. They went inside and continued their day, like something major hadn't changed, and it kind of had. Peyton, Haley and Brooke formed a bond while Haley was in town, and Haley promised to come back over the summer. Brooke said she'd probably be able to get away for some amount of times, and they exchanged email addresses and phone numbers so they could plan their trips together. Peyton was glad to have another friend, and she was glad that her best friend had found someone. She was sure now that Brooke was over Lucas, not that she'd been too worried before, but she was glad Brooke was falling in love nonetheless.
When softball season started, she had less time to hang around the Café, but she continued to write to Lucas every day. It had become as natural to her as drawing and listening to music, which she still couldn't live without. She began to put in applications to colleges, trying to stay in the area, because she didn't want to get too far away from Karen and Lily. She really hoped to get into Duke, with her brother and Haley. It was likely, because she had good grades, a few extracurricular activities and sports.
One day in late February, she received a letter from Lucas. She knew they were training him for something, because she hadn't been getting quite as many letters lately, but she didn't know what exactly was going to happen. She took the other mail inside, and then returned to her front porch swing to read the letter in the evening light, which was sure to fade soon. It went on about some things she had told him, but it was the last line that meant the most to her. 'Don't worry, but I won't be able to write for a while.' What was that supposed to mean? Was he just going to be busy, or would he be risking his life. Well, every day he risked his life over there, but was the chance of her losing him about to get higher.
Immediately, she called Brooke and Haley in a three way call and cried to them for a while about it. She was scared to death. He had told her not to worry, but how could she not? They both tried to comfort her, but it was really no use. She was still crying when she got off the phone with them. As soon as she heard Karen's car pull up, she went next door, needing to know from Karen if this was real. It was, but that didn't help her sanity. Karen tried to comfort her, but she could see that Karen was just as worried as she was, and while she knew that Karen would always worry, because Lucas was her son, that didn't stop the feeling of dread that formed in her stomach. She really wished, more than anything, that she could hear Lucas's voice cheering her up.
Unfortunately, her father came home for the next week, and that meant she couldn't mope too much, because she didn't want him to see her mope, but she hid her misery well. She knew she was possibly overreacting, but the feeling of dread just wouldn't go away. She kept writing to Lucas, but she kept her letters in the drawer with the ones she received from him, so she could give them to him if he ever made it home. She would send her letters to him when she got one back from him. If she got one back from him. She tried not to think like that, but her pessimistic nature couldn't help it.
In late March, a month after she received that last letter from him, she was sitting in the stands, waiting for her final softball game to start. Her hair had grown longer, and it was back to being curly, so she had it up in a pony tail, with a navy and black bow tied around it to match her Ravens uniform. The Lord's Prayer was said and the anthem was sung, and then the announcer asked everyone to bow their heads, for a list of local Afghanistan dead. Karen wasn't at her game because she was at the Café, so there was no one around to notice or care as one name in particular was said.
Ducking beneath the stands, Peyton collapsed to the ground, uncontrollable sobs wracking her body. She couldn't move, couldn't think about anything except for the fact that her boyfriend was dead. She definitely couldn't play softball. When the coaches called her name-no one heard her silent, shoulder-racking sobs beneath the bleachers-they couldn't find her, and had to play without her. She wasn't able to get up for hours, long after the game was over and everyone left the softball diamond.
When she could get up, she was able to slip through a hole between the chained fences. She walked home, because she was still crying, and didn't trust herself to drive. Almost everything on her walk home reminded her of Lucas, and she had to stop walking quite a few times and calm herself down enough to continue. Instead of going to her house, she went right to Karen's, who had been crying all afternoon as well. Apparently, she had gotten the phone call while Peyton was at the game, and Peyton's phone was dead, so she couldn't get a hold of the blonde. Karen offered her guest bedroom, but she asked to sleep in Lucas's. Karen couldn't say no.
Around midnight, Peyton was still sobbing, and unable to sleep. She had dressed in clothes from his closet, which still smelled like him despite how long it'd been since he'd been in them. Karen hadn't told Lily yet, but Lily heard Peyton sobbing and crawled into bed with her anyway. The little girl was almost three now, and incredibly bright for her age. Peyton was extremely proud of the girl, and so was Lucas. She wished Lucas had gotten to see Lily, and see how bright she was. She didn't even get to say goodbye.
That thought haunted her, even when she managed to fall asleep, only because Lily was there with her. She still slept restlessly and woke up early the next morning. When she got out of bed, being careful not to wake the little girl, she went to Lucas's desk, and began writing a letter to him. She decided right then she wouldn't stop. She'd still write a letter to him every day, because she knew in her heart that she should. Her head told her it was stupid, but it made her feel even the least bit better to write to him, even if he wasn't there. She cried as she wrote, but she was careful not to wake Lily.
For the next two weeks, she cried every day, but she continued writing letters to Lucas. She wore Lucas's shirts to school, so she could smell like him, and Karen let her, because she was hurting as well, and if that would make her feel better, well, Lucas wouldn't be able to wear them anymore. They didn't have a funeral, because they had yet to locate the body among the many that died. As soon as they did, the body would be sent over, and they would hold the funeral. Peyton hoped she would be able to find closure then.
In the meantime, Peyton found out she had been accepted to an internship in L.A. for the summer, and she'd been accepted to Duke and NYU and a couple of the other schools she'd applied to, in the fall. She would leave a few days after she graduated, and she would get back a couple weeks before school started. Peyton wasn't sure she wanted to stay near Tree Hill anymore, not without Lucas, so she wasn't sure what she wanted to do. After much deliberation, she decided to go to NYU, where she could be close to Brooke. Her dad had been saving for years, but she didn't want to use that money, because it was his. With the money she had received from Ellie, and the money she had saved up from the Café, she was able to pay for about two years, and she'd find a job in New York, and she'd be able to pay her own way through college, hopefully.
A few weeks later, a body had yet to be found. Karen hoped that it was because he wasn't dead, that maybe he was taken hostage, or something, but it had been over a month, and Peyton didn't hold any hope. She desperately wanted to, but she refused to allow herself to get her hopes up. Karen still hadn't told Lily, because she wanted to wait until they were able to have a funeral, and Peyton kind of agreed. She didn't want to see the devastation on the little girl's face anyway, so she was leaving that up to Karen.
With less than three weeks until graduation and just over three weeks until she left for L.A, Peyton was trying to spend as much time with Lily as she could. She was going to miss the little girl the most, because she was the only thing in Tree Hill that didn't directly remind her of Lucas. It was probably because she didn't have any memories, except the initial ones from the hospital when Lily was born, of Lily and Lucas together. Everything else reminded her of him, and she just couldn't handle that anymore. She would continue writing to him, and sometimes she reread the letters he had sent her, especially the one in which he'd confessed his feelings, but aside from that, anything that reminded her of him hurt.
As she tried to live her life without him, she found her mind constantly being drawn back to the words she'd told him when he had lost Keith, after the school shooting. I wish I could say it did, but really, it still hurts. Eventually it fades, but it still hasn't gone away, for me, at least, she had said. Another thing she had told him kept going through her mind as well. Anyway, in answer to your question, it'll get easier, but there will be times when the pain is pretty much unbearable. Right now, she was really wishing those words weren't true. They were, but maybe if she stayed in denial long enough, they would eventually become true.
The phone rang as she was in Karen's house, watching Lily, who had a cold, while Karen was at the Café. She was doing homework, but really, it was only something to distract herself, because at this point, no one really expected seniors to do homework. Peyton answered the phone, because she always did when she was babysitting Lily, and her shriek when she heard the voice rivaled Karen's on Christmas day. She actually did drop the phone. As she reached down to pick it up, there were tears pouring down her cheeks, and she was convinced it was fake. "Who the hell is this?" she asked.
Laughter filled her ears, and she would know that laugh anywhere. "It's me, Peyt, who do you think it is?" he asked, his voice filling her eardrums and making her brief tears of anger turn into tears of happiness. He explained briefly, though with little detail, that he had been taken hostage and tortured when many were killed, and no one had known that he had been taken hostage. He had been found now, though, and since he was severely injured, he was going to be sent home, but he wouldn't be sent home for at least a month. "God, I love you so much. Thinking of you was the only thing that kept me sane," he finished.
Tears of relief still streamed down her face, and she laughed with joy and did a little dance around the kitchen, getting tangled in the phone cord. As she untangled herself, she remembered the one thing that could rain on her parade. "Lucas, I'm so sorry. I took an internship in L.A. in the music business, and I'll be gone all summer, then I'll be back for like two weeks before I head up to NYU for college," she cried, hearing nothing but silence for a minute. "Forget it, I'll turn down the internship at Sire Records, so we can at least spend the summer together, then I can come home holidays and transfer to Duke for my second year of college. We'll make it work," she promised.
Immediately, he began protesting. He didn't want her to give up her dream for him. He hadn't realized that she wanted to go to New York, but if that was where she was going to go, he'd follow her there, as soon as he could. "No, Peyt, no. Don't you dare change your plans for me. We've made it work this long; we can keep doing the long distance for a while. I'll get to see you when you're home from your internship, and maybe I can come see you in L.A. We'll make it work. I haven't decided whether I'm going to college, or I'm going to get my book published. I have been getting an education here, but I haven't decided what I want to do in the future, except that I know I want to be with you," he told her.
They continued talking until he had to get off the phone, and then Karen took Lily to the Café, so she could give her the good news. When she got home, she wrote him a short letter, expressing her happiness, and then called Haley and Brooke, letting them know the good news. Haley was with Nathan, and she said they had a bit of a surprise for Peyton when they got home. They would be back for her graduation. Peyton was going to see Brooke when she made it to L.A, because Brooke was in L.A, working on Clothes Over Bros, and Julian was with her. Peyton couldn't believe that she wasn't going to see Lucas until the end of the summer but she, like Lucas, was confident that they would work things out, no matter what happened.
On her graduation day, she talked to Lucas, who was getting to go home in a week, a day after she left. It was a bummer that they just missed each other, but she had to start work that day, and he wasn't cleared to go until then. He said he wished he could see her, and she snapped a picture with her cell phone and sent it to his, which he had just gotten back. Nathan and Haley were there, and so was their surprise, which was a wedding band on each of their ring fingers on their left hands. Peyton was shocked, to say the least, but not entirely. She was shocked that they got married, and pissed that she hadn't been invited, but she knew they were it for each other, like Lucas was it for her, so she couldn't really blame them. If she thought she'd be able to get away with eloping with Lucas, she would, but she didn't know if he, or even she, was ready for marriage.
After graduating as class valedictorian, Peyton went back to Karen's, where there was a graduation party awaiting her. She hung out with all of her friends, new and old, and she missed Brooke and Lucas, but she was happier than she'd been in weeks. Just knowing that Lucas was alive, and out there somewhere, made her feel so much better about everything. It was during the time that she thought he was dead that she really had no hope, about anything. She just couldn't picture a world without Lucas in it, somewhere, and she hoped she never would have to again. She wanted to grow old with him and, in a perfect world, they would go at the same time, but hopefully, at least she would go first.
Actually, the more she thought about it, she realized she hoped that he went first, as long as they were old and grey, after their long life together with many kids and grandkids. The reason, she decided, for that, was because she had already lived through thinking she'd lost him, she was pretty sure she could do it again, if she had to. As for him, she didn't want him to have to go through what she'd already been through. She knew how hard it was, and she would never wish that on anyone, not even her worst enemy, and certainly not the love of her life. So, she'd make the sacrifice, and let him go first, because that was what you did for those you love, you do anything to keep them from hurting. She hoped that she didn't have to worry about that for a long, long time, though.
Upon arriving in L.A, Peyton went right to the apartment she was going to live in with Brooke. Brooke owned it, and insisted that Peyton didn't pay any rent, because COB was really making more money than she could spend, and she didn't need any more from her best friend. As soon as Peyton got to the apartment, she let Brooke show her the room that was hers, and then she went to bed, to sleep off her jetlag. She was awoken, the next day, by a phone call from Lucas, letting her know that he'd made it home.
It was a lot earlier where Peyton was than where Lucas was, but still, it was seven o'clock, and she had to be at Sire Records by eight. She talked for a little bit, before she had to jump out of bed and get ready. She promised to call him when she got home, told him she loved him and barely heard him say it back before she hung up. She didn't know what she was going to be doing yet, but she wanted to make a good first impression, because she hoped this would jump start her music career. She wanted to one day open up a label of her own.
It wasn't easy. In fact, that summer was the longest summer of her life, and she did nothing but work in the mail room and get people coffee. It was what she had to do, though. She knew she had to start at the bottom, and work her way up to success in the music business. It didn't matter that Peyton had helped Karen get tons of bands to play at Tric, the nightclub Karen had opened up in Tree Hill. It didn't even matter that she had already produced a CD with Ellie, promoting the charities for breast cancer. No one in L.A. cared about any of that, really, though Lucas told her every day that it did matter.
So, it was clearly not Peyton's most memorable summer, at least, not until she got home. She was waiting for that day for so long, because Lucas never was able to make it to California. She honestly couldn't wait to see him, and be in his arms again. Nothing else mattered to her, except that. Until she could feel his arms around her, everything else about her summer was meaningless. She still wrote to him everyday, though she didn't plan on telling him she had never stopped. Maybe one day she'd give him the letters, but not unless she felt she needed to.
When Peyton finally stepped off that plane, she saw Lucas there, waiting for her, and her face broke out into the biggest grin that had been on it in over two years. She ran towards him, pushing through people, as he was barely able to keep his pace at a walk as he pushed his way towards her. When they met in the middle, she dropped her carry-on and flung herself into his arms. He held her tightly, spinning her around as she lifted her feet off the ground. They each lost themselves in each other, breathing each other in. Peyton loved that he still smelled like her Lucas, and he loved that she still smelled like her cucumber melon shampoo.
As Peyton set her feet back on the ground, she pulled back far enough so she could look at him, and he could look at her, but they could still have their arms around each other. Lucas looked good, if she did say so herself. His muscles were large, and defined, from all the training, and his hair was once again the perfect length. All the bruises and scrapes that he had at the beginning of summer, and hadn't let her see, were gone, and a grin brightened his blue eyes. He was wearing a red tee-shirt, a pair of light blue jeans, which were worn, and she thought he had never looked better.
Looking Peyton up and down, Lucas couldn't help but think the same thing. She seemed to look more gorgeous after every time he saw her. Could that be because he let so much time go between each time he saw her? No. He knew that he would think that if he saw her every day. She was wearing a jean mini-skirt, to show off her legs, just for him, and white flip-flops, to show off her pedicure, which Brooke had insisted she get. She also wore a white halter top, which rode up a little showing off a strip of her toned stomach. She also had a nice tan, from her time in California, and her blonde, curly hair was left down to cascade down her back, the way he preferred it.
After they each took the time to look the other over, Peyton looked up, moving her sunglasses up on top of her head so she could meet Lucas's eyes. Blue met green and there was no stopping the force that pulled their lips together. They lost themselves in each other, forgetting that they were in a crowded airport, with people streaming around them, greeting family and friends. There was only Lucas and Peyton and that was how they felt it should be. They stayed that way until someone knocked into them, causing Lucas to grab onto her waist, and Peyton tighten her hold around his neck so they could stay standing.
At the same time, they both remembered what was going on, and Peyton bit her lip, while Lucas smirked down at her. He leaned down to place one more chaste kiss on her lips, before bending down to take her carry-on, slipping her hand into his free hand. They got her luggage from the baggage claim, and then he drove her, in her Comet, which she had left in Tree Hill, back to their houses. He allowed her to go into her house and drop off her luggage and freshen up quickly before he practically dragged her over to his house, where a welcome home party was waiting for her.
After that, things got nothing but better for the two blondes. Those two weeks while she was in Tree Hill were blissful, and he didn't leave her alone in New York for long. He had sent his book to every publishing house in New York, and had finally gotten picked up by a junior editor, whose offices were in the same city as Peyton. Nathan still barely spoke to Lucas, but Peyton found that she didn't care, because she finally had what she always wanted, a real relationship with the boy she'd loved her whole life.
A/N: Okay, I did not expect to have this chapter finished by today, but I guess I'll give it to y'all anyway. Thanks for the responses to the first part, and I hope you like this part as much as you liked the last. Be sure to tell me what you think, please. Thanks for reading! Oh, and the last chapter was loosely based on You Belong With Me, and I'd Lie, by Taylor Swift. This chapter was loosely based on Traveling Soldier, by the Dixie Chicks.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Tree Hill, or anything to do with those songs that inspired me.