CHAPTER TWO:
"THE EVIDENCE"
Judy didn't really need to use the restroom, a fact that frankly surprised her given how much she'd imbibed this evening.
No. She needed to sort her thoughts.
With a now-experienced ease, the doe locked herself in a stall and hopped up onto the massive one-size-fits-all seat without falling into the bowl (a motion that, given her history, felt like a small victory each and every time she did it). Shoving her face into her paws, she allowed herself to groan with frustration.
What in cheese's name are you doing to yourself, Jude? she began to chastise herself. So you had a little to drink. Nothing new! And Nick was being... Nick! Also nothing new! See? There you go! There's nothing new all around! End of story! It's not like he hasn't been flirtatious before...
But that was. In fact. The problem.
And she knew it too.
Judy punched herself on the thigh. Nick's obnoxious charm had always had the occasional flirtatious side with her; it was a habit which made him even more endearing to her (as juvenile as it tended to be). She'd always blindly accepted it as a part of their banter! Never had she read more into it, and she didn't want to start now.
Good going on that, by the way. she reluctantly admitted. Definitely not reading more into it now, are we? You're just answering the call of nature. With your paws clutching your ears. And your pants still up. And not actually, you know, using the restroom.
She breathed out slowly...
What if he liked her? What if, after all this time, Nick Wilde had actually been hitting on her? Doing his thing, hiding his emotions behind a thick wall of smarmy wit and flattery? The concept wouldn't be entirely out of reason, after all. They'd been posted to keep the peace at "Mating Equality" marches before... A predator being into prey wasn't exactly unheard of, although fairly rare in interspecies relationships if those rallies were any indication. But a fox courting a rabbit?
Okay, let's be logical about this, Jude. she reasoned as she flattened her paws out in the air in front of her, forcing herself into "cop mode". Is there any evidence to support your suspicions?
Well... he'd forgiven her after the press conference when he had no good reason to...
And he'd refused to leave her when she'd injured her leg in the museum...
And he'd given up his lucrative hustling gig for her...
And he'd fought through months of training at the Academy to become her partner, assuring he was with her all day every day...
Nick likes you, Jude.
Her ears shot up like a rocket, a sharp gasp ringing loudly within the otherwise-vacant restroom as her paws clutched her mouth in surprise. Her face and ears flushed hotly with embarrassment.
No! No he doesn't!
But yes. Yes he did.
Clearly.
She'd done the math.
Yes... I... I think Nick does...
Her ears drooped in sudden despair as her battling thoughts finally settled on the obvious conclusion, her arms crossing her chest for comfort. Her partner was interested in her. It terrified her. It was wrong.
No, not wrong. Don't judge him. You can't lose him again.
And that was the real reason for her worry. This was... unexpected. Unfortunate. Unsettling. The idea that the fox might want something more tied her stomach in knots. Here he was, the best friend she'd ever had and easily the best part of moving to Zootopia, and she was going to have to devastate him. Again. Intentionally this time. And what was she going to say when she did? That she was a rabbit, and just couldn't be interested in a fox?
Yeah, like that wouldn't be taken exactly how it sounds...
Judy closed her eyes, quickly becoming overwhelmed by the stress of impending doom. There was no way out of this mess. She was going to lose a partner and, more importantly, her best friend. She loved him dearly... She simply couldn't lose her fox!
...But it was his emotions against hers.
Actually... it's your own emotions against yours! BOOM.
In an instant the doe's face and emotions changed channels, completely forgetting all about her pain in favor of stunned confusion. Her thoughts had just conned themselves, and her entire internal monologue replayed itself in front of her eyes:
Stomach in knots...
Best part of moving to Zootopia...
She loved him...
Her fox...
Judy physically jumped backward as though she'd taken a blow, barely catching herself from falling into the toilet bowl with one outstretched paw. This had never been about Nick! She was the one sitting in a restroom, over-analyzing every detail of their relationship! She was the one coming to terms with the idea of an interspecies relationship! (And now that she thought about it, had she ever been interested in a normal one?) Nick's habits, in fact, had never changed at all. It was indeed her thoughts about the fox which had changed...
I... I like Nick. I can't believe it...!
The rabbit's nose twitched, her whole body beginning to feel antsy. She didn't know what to do with her arms or her legs. Her ears kept scanning the restroom for any sound. Butterflies filled her stomach to make a nauseating concoction. Finally, she looked up in horror at the stall door as she realized she still had to ride home with the handsome tod.
...Jude, you are one dumb bunny.
98 percent... 99 percent...
…
99 percent...
…
Still 99 percent...
...
100 percent!
The loading bar finished filling, indicating the video was ready to play. Flicking a furtive glance toward the restroom doors, Nick made sure the coast was clear before he began watching Clawhauser's paparazzi footage. The duo's little scene began to play out in all its awkward glory, steadily approaching the pivotal moment when the fox's world unwittingly got turned upside down.
"I hear they can be... mesmerizing!" played the recording.
Nick licked his dry lips, eyes fixed on the screen. He refused to blink. He wasn't going to miss it:
"Mm?"
There! There it was! There was the moment! It was quick, it was subtle, but it was there! Nick suddenly felt like all the eyes in the bar had begun to stare at him, when really the opposite was true. Doing an uncharacteristically terrible job at looking natural and composed, Nick's head swiveled to scan the whole room before locking back onto his little screen. Surely his poor performance should have shamed him, but the fox was too preoccupied with rewinding the video and playing it again to notice or care.
"Mm?"
What was THAT, Carrots!? he thought in hopeless agitation. What in all that is holy am I supposed to make of that!? Sincerity? Confusion? Planning? Give me a little more to go on here, for crust's sake!
For the third time, Nick began to watch the video. He'd been a hustler. A street-mammal. Reading mammals had been his bread-and-butter. His forté. For the first time in years he had been met with a puzzle he couldn't immediately solve. The video was scraping at his skull, trying to dig itself into his brain. The feeling was positively excruciating.
The fox felt like he'd gone blind.
"Mm?"
Did she play me? Is that it? The fox began to ponder, a digit of his paw resting on his lip. If so, that was an excellent bluff. Masterful, even. There were so many layers that... No... No no no. That's not it. There's no way she has the skills to pull something like that off. You've seen her acting skills, Slick.
"Mm?"
See? Yeah. That right there? Not intentional. The fox relaxed slightly, a bit more confident now that it was clear he totally had her going. Good turnaround, though. Quick... Well-played... Color me impressed, Fluff! Maybe you can be taught, after all!
"Mm?"
This time the video made sense. Pride washed itself over Nick. He had had her going! He knew his charms were too good! Sure, he'd accidentally allowed her to turn it against him. It happens to the best. But he hadn't been so dumb as to fall for some nonexistant, ellaborate trap. Regardless of his stumble, he'd successfully messed with her. He'd made the straight-and-narrow bunny, if only briefly, become enchanted with a fox of all species! This was too good!
Nick, my main male... You are one smooth mammal!
"It kinda' sounds like you wanted to seduce me..."
Wait what. The fox's ears plastered themselves to the back of his wide-eyed head. Had he? He had! With a nervous gulp Nick turned his attention back to the video, which had continued to play when he'd lost himself in self-congratulation. He swiped back in the timeline, the video conveniently freezing on a humiliating moment – him staring at her eyes, dumbstruck, mouth agape, tongue barely showing. Oh... Oh, no. You know that look. Oh, how many naïve idiots have you seen with that look? We promised ourselves! We said we'd never have it! That look. Right there. That is one hopeless mammal, right there.
Nick closed his eyes, relaxed, and indulged himself in a good chuckle. He'd lived most his life as one hopeless mammal! This was just a new kind of hopeless. A better kind. Something he could manage. In fact, now that he'd got to the bottom of things, this revelation didn't bother him in the slightest. The fox could handle secrets and had lived a life of rejection. Only when he didn't know where he stood was he truly unnerved; he could play any paw he was dealt just so long as he knew what cards he was holding.
In this case, not a great paw. he mused. You gotta' know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em...
Nick rubbed the back of his scruff, pondering his predicament. At that moment Judy reemerged from the restroom and gave him a wave as she pitter-pattered her way back to him. "All set to go, Judy?" he casually inquired.
...
There was a fleeting beat of silence as both their expressions froze in time at the unexpected use of her real name. Time returned to the two mammals just as quickly, both incredibly thankful that neither made any motion to acknowledge what just happened. "Whenever you are!" she replied.
"Great." said Nick, throwing himself off his chair as he turned to call out to the rest of the squad. "We're headin' out!"
The two got waves in reply. Nick remembered something. "Oh! Hey Bogo-Stick...! Six o'clock tomorrow, right?"
Chief Bogo's grunt was affirmative, although clearly not amused at the nickname Nick was determined to make stick. The fox put on a grin as the other officers laughed at Bogo's expense. He'd drudged up old photos of the precinct from back in the day, and to his delight he'd discovered one of a much younger, newly-recruited Bogo who had looked definitively scrawnier. He'd spent the better part of one morning sharing that photo...
"Don't be late, fox."
"Sir, yes sir! I wouldn't dream of it, sir! But for now..." he wiggled the digits of his paws at the room. "...Toodles!"
With that, the fox swaggered out of the bar. Judy took a breath, raised a digit of her paw, and was about to say something. But she thought better of it, bit her tongue, pointed at the door, and followed him out into the warm night air.