Love Changes Everything
Disclaimer: I Do Not Own Final Fantasy Okay?
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CHAPTER 1: A New Restart?
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Love that I thought we shared
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Obsidian nights that I spent alone
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Verge of death that I teetered off of
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Everything that I lost because of you
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Longing to be held by you
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Entire days where I can't think of anything but you
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Senseless tears that I cried for you
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Stupidity that I feel when I realize I'm still in love with you
The unexpected ringing of a bell awoke Cloud suddenly.
"Cloud, wake up…we have self-training session today remember?" A Familiar voice called out.
Cloud sprang up from bed and looked at the owner of the voice and his eyes widened, his older brother in Second Class SOLDIER Standard Uniform was looming on him, Sharp Blue eyes yet radiates warmth and that very familiar feature that belonged to their father and the Golden Hair that belonged to their mother.
"Big…Brother?" He muttered in shock…
The older blond nodded knowingly.
"Yes…I know, we're back in time and this time I'm alive…"
"Alive? This time?" Cloud asked then it hit him he knew his brother had vanished without a trace.
He sprang up and clutched his brother's shirt.
"What do you mean? What happened?" He asked.
"Cloud…in the Future where you've been…I'm already dead, I no longer exist…or several months by now I might be dead or so if Minerva would allow that to happen…" The Older Blond said.
"I won't allow it! No!" Cloud said frantically.
The Older Strife looked at the younger one sadly.
"I can't lose you again…please…don't go and leave me all alone!" Cloud said pain etched in his voice and in his face.
The older blond pulled the younger one into a gentle hug and hummed lightly.
"I'm not, I don't make mistake twice, but we couldn't stop putting our lives in dangers, that's what we SOLDIERs are, but I will try my very best to stay alive for your sake Cloud. If the Goddess allows that then I will stay with you, I have faith in her. Believe in her as I do."
Cloud looked at him with those bright blue eyes, the older had to smile at those innocent looking eyes, but deep in those eyes is a Mako enhanced warrior with Jenova genes. He and Cloud are Advanced than any SOLDIERs but they won't show it just yet, he had to thank Minerva with the advanced enhancement he'll be able to survive this time around, he don't want to die in that painful death again. Dying as a dissected Lab rat is one thing he never wanted to die as.
"Hush now, I'm here…you don't have to worry you know…" He muttered trying to calm the hysteric Cadet who was his brother.
Cloud looked up at his brother with those blue eyes…
"Now, dress up, while I go prepare Breakfast." The older blond smiled and stood up from where he had been sitting and went out of the room.
Once the Older Blond is out, Cloud felt a little shame of himself, he cried in front of his now Alive Brother, he's a man now…well his soul is old but his body is younger, but he felt lighter than before just seeing the Older One alive and breathing. He can feel strong aura on the older man's body and just how the man had held him, he knew that his older brother was a Strong Man in that time before his death and now that he's alive again, he is as sure as hell that his brother is even stronger than he is…wait if he's 16 then how old was his brother? His cheeks colored at the thought…he shook his head, he should be mature not acting like a real 16 years old!
"Act your age if you don't wanna get caught you know…" The Older Strife chuckled by the door watching the younger making faces.
Cloud jumped and turned to see his grinning brother.
"Please don't do that…" He muttered.
"Matured your soul may be but your body is not, so try and be sweet 16 again, this only happens once you know." Wilmar chuckled.
"How old are you then?" Cloud shot back.
"Hmm…I died at the age of 26 which would be 5 years later, but my body is physically 21…so I'm 21 in this time." Wilmar grinned. "Now that you're fully clothed why don't we go to the kitchen and eat, okay? Can't go to training with an empty stomach~!"
Cloud was glad that the Director allowed him to live with his Big Brother even he was still a Cadet, you can't separate a family now can we? The Breakfast was simple, A toasted bread, a pair of bacon, a sunny side-up egg and an orange juice.
"We'll do a mock training today so not to get suspicious Cloud…we will act like we are a SOLDIER and a Cadet, alright…" The older blond said as he chews on his Bacon.
"Alright…we should have control over our monstrous strength too right?" Cloud asked.
"Yes…that's one of the rules, secondly, Cloud…try not to get sweep off your feet…" Wilmar said knowingly.
"What?" Cloud asked in confusion, not getting what his brother was saying.
"I mean…don't fall in love with someone just yet while we still had lots of work to do, you can have a 'Go At It' once our work is done." The Older Strife answered which he was earned a blush.
"Wh-Who said I was going to fall in love?" Cloud stuttered.
"Cloud, being in the Lifestream had its benefits you know…" Wilmar grinned. "You really had a good taste on men, especially that Zack fellow…I guess opposite attracts really do its magic."
"Big Brother…"
"You two are so cute…"
"Big Brother…Stop…"
"I can't believe that you two would end up together it's like a fairytale…"
"BIG BROTHER!" Cloud was really red in the face that could make Reno's hair run for its money.
"I'm just teasing you know…" Wilmar chuckled and was satisfied seeing Cloud blush. "You're so cute when you blush…"
Cloud groaned and Wilmar cackled being alive was worth it…at 8:30 AM both brothers were down in the training ground near the Garden, two training swords laid on the ground as the two brothers warms up before the training…
"So…why did you ask to train me?" Cloud asked.
"You should know by now that family sticks together you know, you're my family so I stick to you and you as well to me." Wilmar said as he performed Tai Chi…
Cloud couldn't say a thing, his brother is right, he should stick to his Family more than to do things on his own when he was still in that Future before it became a nightmare.
"Don't think about the Nightmare of that Future, look forward on this Present." Wilmar said knowing his younger brother was thinking of the future he had been.
"I know…" Cloud answered.
Once they were done warming up they picked up their swords…
"You ready?" The Older asked. "I won't hold back…"
"Yeah…" Cloud answered knowing that his Older Brother takes the first move so he charged and swings his sword in an arch and brought it down.
The first attack from his brother is a simple testing blow, which Cloud easily countered. It was a show of impatience, that he's not so weak or untrained. In response, Wilmar countered with a quick, upwards slash with enough force to nearly wrench his Sword from Cloud's hand. Taking the point, Cloud cancelled his offensive and fell back into a ready position.
Wilmar 's next series of attacks forced Cloud onto a continuous defence, not allowing him counters or offensives, instead testing Cloud's ability to hang onto his sword and deflect attacks in time. Shoved in his face in such a blatant manner, Cloud had to admit that his Sword had been a lot easier to handle when he'd been 50lbs heavier. His constant training had made him particularly skilled at cutting through training robots, but this was something different all together.
Cloud was actually enjoying it.
His enjoyment was starting to rise, however, when Wilmar started hitting harder, faster, and using far more advanced moves then required for a basic duel. Wilmar seemed to be happy with forcing Cloud into a nimble, evasive defence, and instead focused on disarming Cloud or catching him off guard. When Wilmar feigned an attack to his left, Cloud didn't realize his mistake until it was too late to heave his Sword across his body, leaving his right side wide open for Wilmar 's body check that sent him to the ground.
Cloud counted to three before pushing himself up, and drawing his body back to a defensive stance. He was entirely unsure of what Wilmar's motives were now, as it was definitely a playful duel to test Cloud's skills. The man's eyes were intense, his expression observant and serious. Whatever he was thinking about, whatever he was focusing on, and it was far beyond analysing Cloud's skill in battle. Wilmar waited until Cloud had gathered himself, before setting up a brisk, and brutal charge that challenged Cloud's grip on his Sword and shoved the smaller body back a few paces.
The second attack came far swifter and harder than Cloud had expected or prepared for, forcing Cloud to his knees. Swiftly catching one of the levers on his Sword's hilt, he detached one of the lighter side blades, pulling it across his body to block the next attack with far more grace than he could have managed with his Sword alone.
Now with a blade in either hand, Cloud was given the advantage of lessened weight and an extra means of defence, making his job of fending off Wilmar's relentless attacks a little easier. However as the fight stretched on, Wilmar never backing down or stopping his steady onslaught, Cloud started to tire quickly… After a long training session, Wilmar wasn't giving him near enough time to keep his breath.
Cloud longed for materia when an unexpected twist of Wilmar's blade wrenched his Sword from his hand, leaving Cloud with just the lightweight blade to deflect the next string of attacks with. The next attacks pushed him further back, away from where his Sword had fallen, and not giving him a chance to pick it up again. Annoyed, his patience growing thin, Cloud used some of his new found speed, taking advantage of being weighed down less than he was with his Sword.
But Wilmar's speed was still superior. A quick stab to Cloud's side brought Cloud's sword downward to deflect it, his grip lower on the handle of his sword. But before Cloud could even move, Wilmar had spun with another attack, this time an upwards swoop. Cloud's grip failed, and his last means of defence went flying. The final hit of the combo was directed at an entirely disarmed Cloud, who was sluggish in jumping out of the way. Wilmar twisted his hold on his sword at the last moment, hitting Cloud's side with the flat of his blade, still using enough force to knock Cloud to the ground, and ensure that he would be sporting a bruise the next day.
"Yield?" The older blond asked.
"Yield…" Cloud huffed… "It was supposed to be training!"
"Yes, a training but you learn faster when you make it real you know, I was testing your reflex in actual duel, I say 9 out of 10 is your score…your observation skill needs sharpening you know, your reflex, strength, tactics and so are good…ready for meditation?" The Older Blond asked.
"You just gave me a bruise so why not…" Cloud muttered and sat in the grassy ground and crossed his legs.
"Try to relax you're too tense for your own good." The older blond huffed.
When Wilmar's set deceivingly gentle hands on his shoulders, Cloud jumped. "You aren't even trying to relax." The taller man grumbled, though there was amusement in his tone.
"I can't." Cloud said honestly. "I don't even know how."
When Wilmar chuckled, the man was close enough Cloud felt warm breath against his hair. "You do it every time you enter combat. Tension leaves you and you fly. You focus only on battle, and forget everything else. Do that now."
The bliss of battle was a headspace Cloud loved. It was what he was designed for. His life was an overcomplicated mess, a constant struggle against everything threatening to overwhelm him. But combat was different. In a fight, his only goals were to stay alive, and eliminate the threat. Then, he did not have to worry about why he was fighting, his motives or reasons. None of that mattered until after the battle was over. The rush of the moment was what brought him peace.
The last months of his life had been nothing but fighting, and Cloud was fully aware that had it been any different, he would not have lasted so long. Without war to lose himself in, he would have fallen apart.
"I don't do it intentionally." Cloud frowned. "It just...happens."
"Then stop thinking about anything. Let it happen. Breath in…Breathe out, repeat and try to relax, clear your mind and think of something that makes you at ease and focus to it…" Wilmar said as he watches the younger blond began to relax… he sat in front of his younger brother and began meditating himself too, his body was already wailing to relax.
Little did he know that he and Cloud were being observed by some Ravenettes somewhere in the Garden…the duo found the two blondes somehow familiar somewhere, yes, they kept on seeing the two in the building, or in the hall…but somehow they had met them somewhere just couldn't point a finger on it. Why can't they remember?
An hour had passed Cloud opened his eyes and the first thing he saw is his brother's serene and beautiful facial looks, he blushed at the thoughts, but looks can be very deceiving, he knew his brother is a Hardened Warrior from the inside despite being Gentle and Feminine looking on the outside, and he can be very terrifying if he wanted to. But enough of that he shifted for a moment and looked into his brothers now open eyes, they were Sky Blue in color like his though they were warm looking.
"Did you have a nice look on your Big Brother's face?" The Older Blond teased.
Cloud squeak and blushed again for the second time of the day…the older blond chuckled and stood up from his position and the younger followed.
"It's almost lunch time, let's head back to our room and get some lunch…do you want to eat something particular?" The Older asked.
"I'm not picky on what you cook…" Cloud said as he deadpanned.
"Alright, anything edible it is…" The older one chuckled then he paused when he noticed Cloud was looking somewhere in the garden. He looked at where Cloud was looking and caught the eyes of one Angeal Hewley…his eyes widened and pushed Cloud towards the building. "Come on Cloud quit dallying."
Once the blond duo was safe inside their room, Cloud sat in the sofa and looked at the floor, unconsciously putting a hand on his chest where his heart should be. Wilmar knew the feelings too, because when he caught the gaze of Angeal Hewley his heart twinges in pain.
"Will…" He called out looking at his older brother's saddened looks.
"I know Cloud…it hurts, I felt it too." The older one answered.
"Why does it always hurt? Why does it always hurt when I look at him?" Cloud said as his eyes covered by his bangs and clutched his chest tightly that his knuckles turned white.
Wilmar sat beside his younger brother and gathered him in his arms and let him lean closer.
"We are always hurt because we love, you are hurt because you love him…"
"But we're not supposed to love unless our purpose is done…" Cloud answered.
"But you're not forbidden to befriend him…" Wilmar said.
"But…" Cloud protested as he clutched his chest again.
"It'll pass…I know it will…"The Older Blond smiled.
"Have you felt this before?" Cloud asked.
"That was somewhere in the Past of the Future where I had been before I died, Cloud…But yes, I did felt it, the same as what you felt…I did loved a man, whenever I looked at him it hurts, here…" Wilmar answered and pointed where his heart is. "It's the pain of longing for the one you loved, but that had to wait because of the purpose that was tasked on you had to be done first before anything else."
"Have you been together with that man after your purpose?" Cloud asked curiously.
"Sadly Cloud, no…the last time we saw each other is the time a dusk before me and my Squad are sent on a mission, the man I loved gave me an Angel Necklace made out of Mako Crystal, I died at the Breaking Dawn from both fatal wound and casting of relentless spells until I was drained of anything I had, My strength, my stamina, and my power, everything, I was the Last One to fall after the Ambush…the last thing I saw before I died are the pained faces of my friends and superiors." Wilmar answered with a sad smile.
"Zack and I-." Cloud began.
"Shhh, you don't have to relive that nightmare, Cloud…I know because I've seen everything from the Lifestream, it hurts more than anything to let you end up like that and it hurts even more to see you suffer alone, but now…I swear it won't happen again…not Gaia nor Minerva or being the Lifestream could stop me Protecting you this time like I should have done that day, Cloud." The older blond said firmly.
"I know you would…about the man you loved, have you two…you know…" Cloud stuttered.
Wilmar blushed at what Cloud meant, yeah…he did kissed the man he loved or the man had kissed him instead, he even blushed harder when he remembered their first Activity two weeks after that incident. He swore he could hear his ancestors in the Lifestream giggle like mad and Minerva too, and if he could believe it even Gaia purred in amusement.
"That's the first time I saw you blush, your face could put Reno's hair to shame." Cloud stated and grinned when the older Strife pouted petulantly.
"Very funny Cloud…" The Older man huffed.
That noon Cloud was hanging out with his friends, while the older Strife was in the garden looking at the beautiful flowers, he noticed Cloud was walking with his fellow Cadets in Sector 5 along with Zack as he recognized the SOLDIER, Cloud will be safe because Zack was around, so here he was in the garden, to the exact place where he first met Angeal, but this time it has to be different…he won't be friendly like he did before, it's not that he don't want to hurt the man, but to keep the man his distance until it's time for him to know everything that he and Cloud are from the Future. And another thing is that the man doesn't know that he (Wilmar) died in the Future (Or 5 years from now) from a severe ambush from the Avalanche terrorist. It pained him to see the man (Angeal) in tears when he was dying. He loved the man so much that it hurts. He hoped Cloud had a better long and memorable relationship than he was so at least he had something to cherish the most from that relationship, unlike him who only met the man he had loved and dated for several months and died after that. How ironic, the older one had the worst luck of all…he was not jealous of Cloud in fact he was glad that he hadn't forgotten his feelings for the man (Zack) he loved. He (Wilmar) loved Angeal, but he just can't bear to face the man right now, not like this, not until his purpose is done and he's free to do what he wants to do, but he was worried about what will happen in later future, will he die and leave Angeal again? Will Minerva allow that to happen after all the pain he had to endure watching the people he loved Suffer and endure what life had to throw at them? He wanted to be with Angeal as he loved the man so much, he wants to be with the people he loved, his friends, his brother and Angeal…that's he was asking to the Goddess he revered and to the Planet he had respected. He will endure as much pain as he could in this second chance, just this once he want to make things right before entering relationship, right now focus on his and Cloud's purpose. It saddened him though…just to be friends or not, and both Angeal and Zack had no memories of them…heck every single one of the people here in the base had no memories of them.
So deep was his thoughts that he didn't realize that the said man was standing several steps away from him.
"Are you alright?" the man asked out of the blue.
Wilmar jumped and turned to see the man he was thinking of just a while ago, his eyes widened as those familiar feelings returned along with that twinge of pain…his self-imposed Forbidden Meeting with the man he was supposed to love…Angeal…he's here…but why do he felt scared of the man? Why was he even standing there gaping like an idiot instead of walking away and forget Angeal for a while and focus more on how to prevent the Nightmare from coming?
"I…" He began… 'Aw hell! Why now!?'
The two just stood there looking at each other, their fateful first (Second for Wilmar) meeting has dawned.
'I think now would be the time to be jealous of Cloud for being lucky.' Wilmar cursed himself.
To Be Continued
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