"Hey, it's me, I wanted to talk to you about something... no, that's too forward. She might think I'm trying to get her back."
Yamcha paced back and forth in his hotel room as he tried to prepare a conversation to have with his ex. He had already wanted to still be friends with Bulma after their break up but hadn't done anything about it. Then he had nearly died literally that morning. Now he was two hours post meeting a merman and filled with more emotions than he was used to. Feelings about things other than said merman. The sunset had faded a while ago and now all that was left were stars. If he was going to call before she fell asleep he'd have to do it soon. He sighed and sat on the bed. There was no point in stalling any longer. With a hint of reluctance he grabbed his phone and dialed Bulma's number. It only took a couple of rings before she picked up.
"Yamcha what the fuck?!"
"I see you kept my contact... uh, how are you?" Yamcha said with a wince.
"Really? You're asking me how I am NOW? You haven't contacted me in over a year!" Bulma yelled over the phone. "So what the hell?"
"Well, I..." Yamcha started weakly. Then he sighed and decided to drop the casual pretense. If he didn't speed things up she might hang up on him. "Look Bulma, I know, it's been a long time. We both have our own lives now and I'm not trying to get into yours again."
"Then why did you call?" Bulma asked. It sounded like she had calmed down slightly.
"Something happened today and it made me think... I don't want us to be mad at each other forever. If you don't want to be friends again that's okay. I just didn't want something to happen and the last thing we said to each other be from some fight we had." Yamcha explained.
"... I wouldn't want that either. You're a good guy, Yams. Not the right guy for me but it's not like you're a total asshole." Bulma said softly. Yamcha smiled even though he knew she couldn't see it.
"Thanks, Bulms. That's a lot off my mind." he said.
"If I may ask... what happened? That caused this?" Bulma said.
"Well... you know how I'm a marine biologist now?" Yamcha said. "I got assigned to a project in Japan. Runs 'till the end of the week."
"Sounds fancy." Bulma remarked. "Doesn't explain anything though."
"I'm getting to that. I was on a free dive this morning and I saw a cave." Yamcha continued. "I swam down to it, but..."
"But what?" Bulma asked.
"I misjudged how far away it was. When I got inside the cave I... ran out of air." Yamcha said sheepishly. "Long story short, I think a near death experience is reason enough to want to make amends, right?"
"You drowned?!" Bulma exclaimed.
"Not quite. I mean, I'm alive aren't I?" Yamcha said. He tried to laugh it off. "Not that big of a deal after all, am I right?"
"Yamcha... are you okay?" Bulma said quietly. Yamcha took a moment to think. He was decidedly not okay. Evey time he thought about it his throat tightened and his mouth got dry. He'd had close calls before but none that close. He hadn't thought about it much. Which made sense considering his discovery of a Merman right after it happened.
"... I'll be fine." Yamcha said eventually.
"If you say so." Bulma said. "I take it you got saved by some gorgeous local princess?"
"You'd think but no." Yamcha said with a laugh. "Nah, I got rescued by a local who was out swimming at the same time."
"Lovely lady?" Bulma inquired. Yamcha laughed again.
"I don't think you'd want to call him one." he said. "He's nearly as built as Goku."
"Impressive." Bulma said with a whistle. "Did you get the kiss of life anyways?"
"It's not like there were many options besides CPR, are there?" Yamcha said. "It worked but I'd say he still has a while to go before he's kissing anyone with confidence."
"You meanie." Bulma teased. "Wait - how would you remember what his kissing skills were like? Weren't you unconscious?"
"Uh-" Yamcha cut himself off before he could say anything else. He didn't think Bulma would pick up on that. He tried to change the topic. "So, how are things on your end?"
"Don't you dare ignore me on this, Yamcha. What happened?" Bulma demanded. It was easy to pick up on the excitement in her voice. "Did he kiss you? A kiss that wasn't for medical reasons?"
"... yeah." Yamcha admitted reluctantly. He buried his face in a pillow as Bulma giggled.
"Oh my god! Did you kiss him back?" Bulma asked joyously.
"That's not important." Yamcha grumbled.
"You totally did! Holy shit!" Bulma said. "What's his name? What's he like? Are you gonna see him again?"
"It's Tenshinhan. What he's like is none of your business and ditto on the last point." Yamcha replied. He could almost hear Bulma pouting over the phone.
"Come on! You owe me!"
"Why do I owe you?"
"Because I picked up the phone." Bulma said. Yamcha knew it was pointless trying to argue with her.
"That's not a valid reason but fine, I'll tell you because we're friends." he said.
"That's right, secret sharing is what friends do." Bulma said triumphantly. "Now spill."
"He's a nice guy. Kind of a dick at first but he's easy to talk to. About as easy to tease." Yamcha said, remembering how little it took to fluster the merman. "He gets embarrassed fast."
"Sounds adorable. Even with all those muscles you mentioned." Bulma said. "What's the status on future meetings?"
"I'm gonna hang out with him tomorrow. He knows the waters around here better than me. He can help with my research." Yamcha said.
"Look at you go. You've been there for how long, like a day, and you've already got yourself a boyfriend?" Bulma said.
"It's been two days since I got here and boyfriend is a strong word." Yamcha said. Bulma scoffed.
"He saved your life and kissed you, and you're spending more time with him? He's your boyfriend, Yams." Bulma said. "You HAVE to send me a picture."
"I'll, uh, ask him about it." Yamcha said while envisioning his scaled friend. "He's kinda self conscious."
"At least try for me, okay?" Bulma said. "I'm so proud of you. Getting out there in the world."
"Thanks Bulma. Talk to you soon?" Yamcha said, hoping to end the conversation before he revealed anything else he shouldn't.
"I don't see why not. You have to update me on that Tenshinhan guy soon though." Bulma said.
"I'll do my best. Bye Bulms." Yamcha said.
"Later, Yams. Have fun." said Bulma. It was easy to imagine her winking on the other end of the phone. She hung up before Yamcha could protest. He tried to relax. That was one call down. He took a minute or so to get ready before punching in the next number. He had a lot more people to make peace with.
The next morning...
"How did you even graduate?"
"Hey, it's not my fault humans don't have the same info merpeople do on fish." Yamcha said. He jabbed an elbow into Tien's side as the merman laughed at him. They were sitting on a rock near the edge of the island together. Tien had taken it upon himself to lecture Yamcha on every species they saw after he mentioned taking notes. It had been nearly an hour and Yamcha already had more facts than he knew what to do with.
"Well, humans should. It's important." Tien pointed out. "You said you work at an aquarium, right? Stuff like this would make life a lot better for the creatures you have there."
"That's true. I'm going to have to talk to the director about tank updates when I get home." Yamcha agreed. "You're definitely helping a lot of fish."
"Glad to hear it." said Tien. He pointed to yet another animal swimming past them. "Speaking of fish, that one's -"
Yamcha tried to pay attention but he found himself distracted. The sun reflected and sparkled not only off the water but also off Tien's scales. It caught his attention and kept. The gentle look in the mermans eyes as he enthusiastically talked about marine life wasn't helping either. It was endearing in a way Yamcha hadn't expected. He vaguely heard what Tien was saying about the fish he was gesturing to but his mind was wandering. Part of him wondered just how Tien's gills functioned as they fluttered in the breeze. Another part was focused solely on how he could kiss Tien without it being too awkward. He shook his head gently as he realized what he was thinking. Just how far was he gone for this merman?
"Are you okay?" Tien asked. "You haven't been writing anything down."
"Y'know, I think I'm good on notes for today." Yamcha said. "Any more and you'd have nothing left to teach me tomorrow."
"There's always things to learn about." Tien said. "Especially for you."
"Thanks for the vote of confidence." Yamcha said. "What about you? Shouldn't you be asking me about human stuff?"
"I know enough." Tien said with a shrug.
"Hypocrite." Yamcha said. He felt his phone buzz and checked it. There was a text from Bulma on screen.
So, how's your date going? ;)c
He rolled his eyes and typed a quick response.
-He's been talking about fish for an hour. A true romantic.
He put his phone away and noticed Tien staring at him. "What's up?"
"That's a cellphone, right?" Tien said.
"Technically it's a smartphone but you're right." Yamcha confirmed. "I take it you've never seen one before?"
"Only heard about them. They don't work so well underwater." Tien said.
"So you just shout really loud towards who you want to talk to instead?" Yamcha said.
"Very funny." Tien said. "Merpeople don't speak to each other much."
"That explains a lot about you." Yamcha teased. Tien splashed some water at him with his tail. Yamcha laughed and shielded his face with his arm.
"And just how often do you talk to other humans?" Tien said.
"As a matter of fact," Yamcha said smugly as his phone buzzed again, "I'm going to talk to one right now."
Remember you promised me that picture, lover boy
-I promised to try. I haven't even asked him yet.
Well get to it then! It won't happen if you don't say anything.
-I'm well aware. Let me enjoy my fish lecture.
:P
"...Who are you talking to?" Tien asked. He was leaning in towards Yamcha's shoulder to look at the screen.
"A friend." Yamcha said.
"You said yesterday that you didn't have any that cared." Tien said.
"Yeah, after I got back on dry land I called a few of them and talked things out." Yamcha explained. "Therefore I have friends now."
"That's good to hear." Tien said. "What's that one saying?"
"She, uh..." Yamcha stalled as he tried to come up with a way to explain Bulma's messages. Tien leaned in closer and squinted at the screen.
"A picture? What are they talking about?" he asked.
"You...uh... you can read?" Yamcha said sheepishly.
"Three languages." Tien stated.
"Oh. That's neat." Yamcha said. He wasn't sure if his own measly grasp on Japanese qualified as speaking the language.
"So, what does your friend mean by asking for a picture?" Tien continued.
"I may have accidentally mentioned our kiss when I was talking to her last night... and now she thinks you're my boyfriend... and wants to see a picture of you." Yamcha said nervously. He started to feel a little panicked when Tien didn't respond. "Don't worry, I told her you were self conscious so there's no need to-"
"Okay."
"Huh?"
"I said it's okay." Tien clarified. Yamcha watched dumbfounded as Tien shut his eyes and took a deep breath. There was a brief flash of light that could have been mistaken for a reflection off the waves and Tien opened his eyes again. Two of them. All he had. From the waist up he looked identical to a human. Yamcha almost didn't believe it.
"That's a... thing you can do?" he said weakly.
"Comes with the third eye." Tien said with a smile. "It's an illusion that doesn't last too long but it's enough to trick anyone who spots me for a while. Helps if I'm seen while I'm out hunting."
"I see..." Yamcha said slowly. He'd have to ask about that more later. For the moment he got his phone camera ready and held it up. "Smile!"
Tien did so and Yamcha sent the picture to Bulma along with a "There you go, now stop asking."
"I didn't know your third eye could do stuff like that." Yamcha said.
"That's about all it can do besides making things easier to see." Tien said. He let the illusion drop and smiled with once again sharp teeth. "Food doesn't know what hit it."
"I can imagine." Yamcha said. Tien laughed quietly and Yamcha felt something in his chest warm. Before he knew it he'd snapped another picture of Tien without him noticing.
"Speaking of food it's almost lunch time." Yamcha said. He stood and tucked his phone away again. "And as much as I love sushi I'd rather eat back in town."
"Will you be back later?" Tien asked. Yamcha recognized the small blush on the merman's face and grinned.
"Sure. You can tell me more about fish." he said. He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss just above Tien's third eye. "See you then."
"Agreed." Tien said stiffly. He was a solid red by now and made a point to splash Yamcha again as he dove into the water. Yamcha laughed and waved as he made his way to his boat. On his way back to shore he got a reply from Bulma.
OMG
Yamcha, holy shit
You lucky bastard
He's beautiful!
Yamcha chuckled and responded.
- I know.
When he got back to land and had sat down for lunch Bulma had sent no less than ten similar messages. He scrolled through them with a sigh. He was never going to hear the end of this. When he sent his last response he noticed the second picture he had taken in his gallery. The one of Tien just being himself. Yamcha smiled and almost without thinking made it his homescreen. Then he put his head in his hands. He was in way too deep. He was also feeling way too conflicted. He had to report this. Merpeople existing was a major scientific discovery. He needed to tell the world... didn't he? On the other hand he didn't want to betray Tien's trust. If merpeople wanted humans to know about them they would have done something about it. He couldn't just turn around and spill their secret after what he'd been through. Especially after what Tien did for him. There was also the added factor of his now clear crush on the merman in question. Yamcha decided to deal with all of that another day and got back to eating. He had another fish lecture to get to, after all.