I own nothing, nothing at all. Nat is c2ndy2c1d's and all the characters are from the brilliant mind of Danny Antonucci. The song Patience is by Abandoning Sunday.
"It'll be okay" The words were a stab to his heart and in his mind he raged.
"And don't you tell me it's all okay and I can't hear a single word you say"
He stopped listening once he heard those words leave Kevin's mouth. It bothered him that he had thought to say such a thing, the audacity of it. He felt offended by the statement and all he could manage to say was goodbye and he did just that. Any more and he would have cried in front of him, but he had wouldn't let himself do that. He wasn't going to let Kevin see that. Just because he had a smaller frame than him and a more frail appearance, didn't make him weak or frail. He was strong enough to handle this situation in his own way. Edd hadn't planned on going to see him before he left. Edd's mind was set, he was going to act as if it didn't hurt him but he couldn't. Not when he was alone. Around others he could fake a smile and act indifferent to the situation but when he was alone, that was another story. The hours Edd would normally spend with Kevin dragged on longer than usual… and the nights… well, the nights he found he had difficulty sleeping. No matter how tired he was he couldn't seem to get comfortable nor could he bring himself to sleep on the now empty side that was once Kevin's.
He would scold himself for missing him, stating it wasn't rational or convenient that he allow his emotions to influence his actions. That any tears were unnecessary. All of it was just a waste of time that he could have used in a more productive manner.
He had intended to just let him leave without an attempt at reconciliation or even the possibility of a friendship. He couldn't work up the courage to go to the house, stand in the driveway and confront Nazz, after all hadn't she encouraged and supported them the most? Apart from that, he couldn't just stand there and wait as Kevin and Nat loaded the things into the car. As for Nat, he and Nazz had both been very encouraging and supportive when others were hesitant. They had declared themselves the couple's personal cheerleaders.
Lastly, he couldn't face Kevin. He had too many reasons as to why he didn't go or why he thought he shouldn't go, and each one he was able to shoot down as a stupid reason. How could he confront the three of them? He had been distant with the two when they demonstrated their concerns and was acting as if the last of the trio was nonexistent. Instead he resorted to sneaking behind the curtains of his window to watch him leave, careful to not let himself be seen.
"And I'll be the one that you won't forget and I'll make sure you remember it."
He wanted to tell him not to forget him, but he felt that'd make him appear weaker than he already did. 'So you hide instead, like a coward instead of confronting your problems. You can't run forever. He'll forget you if he believes there's no chance.' He couldn't go, he wouldn't. How he hoped Kevin wouldn't forget about him.
'Don't you love him?' the sound of a car engine starting brought him back from his thoughts and he glanced out his window.
It wasn't until the car was backing out of the driveway that he realized where he needed to be. He ran downstairs as fast and as carefully as he could. That's the last thing he needed, an injury obtained as he attempted to run after Kevin. He opened the door and ran out into the middle of the street, stopping as he watched Kevin turn around in his seat facing forward. He glanced around the neighborhood to see if there was anyone around. No one. His shoulders slumped forward as he rested his hands on his knees in an attempt to catch his breath. This had to be a nightmare. Kevin was gone, the person he needed most, gone. And because of his stubbornness he hadn't been able to say a proper goodbye. He lifted his head, watching as the car made a turn. He straightened up and urged his legs to keep pace, convinced that he could reach the car. He had to reach it. He had to reach him. Soon as he made the turn he stopped and looked for the car but it was nowhere in sight. He was gone. Breathing heavily he stood at the corner hoping and praying for a car that wouldn't come back anytime soon. He was gone, just like a bad memory.
"Cause I'd like to wake up and be gone like a real bad memory, like a nightmare in a dream, and I'd love to open up my eyes and see you right there next to me, being all I'll ever need.
I don't need you right now,
what's a few more years?"