"Though art to me a delicious torment"
Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Potter, are you stalking me?" Lily demanded at lunch the next day.
James looked over at her and smiled lazily. "Not that I'm aware of, but I could if you wanted me to, Evans."
Lily harrumphed and swung out of her seat, marching over to where James sat with his friends. He had been in all three of the classes she'd had so far, as well as her free period.
"I'm serious, Potter…" James's best friend Sirius opened his mouth, but James cut him off with a smack across the head. "Since when have we done the same classes?"
"Since my after school ambitions changed I guess," he shrugged easily. "Are you going to leave poor Alice sitting there by herself or are you going to invite her up here to eat with us."
Disarmed by the thought of James Potter teaching her manners, Lily waved anxiously at Alice to join them. The girls squeezed in beside Remus and Peter and grabbed at the closest plate of sandwiches, the lunch hour was half over already, but they had been late to leave Transfiguration.
"What've you got next then?" James asked.
"Potions, and then Herbology," Lily replied.
"Looks like we'll be seeing a lot of each other this year then," James grinned at her.
"Looks like," she muttered.
Sirius grinned at the exchange going on between the pair. "Prongs is serious this year you know, or he wishes he was."
Remus and Peter smirked and James flicked the crust of his sandwich at Sirius.
"How's Frank, Alice?" Remus asked.
"He's doing really well," she said, and then began regaling the boys with second hand tales of Auror training. Lily, who had already heard them all, looked around, disinterested.
"How's the maturity thing coming today, Potter?" She asked.
"So far so good. I haven't hexed anyone yet," he replied jokingly.
"Why do I have the feeling that won't last long?"
"Some faith, Evans, please, you're wounding me," James said, laughing.
James, Remus, Alice and Lily walked to Potions together while Sirius and Peter went to enjoy the sunshine in their free period. The air grew colder as they wound further and further towards the dungeons and Lily was beginning to wonder if, despite her natural talent for the subject, taking Potions had really been such a good idea. It was always so cold in the dungeons, and the dampness of the air gave her an eerie sensation she could never quite shake. Perhaps it was her knowledge that the Slytherin's resided there that gave her the feeling that she was about to be ambushed at any moment. Though she would never admit it, she was secretly glad for the presence of Remus and James beside her.
The class size had shrunk considerably from the year before, many students obviously not meeting the requirements for entry into seventh year. Three Ravenclaws and a Hufflepuff were already in the classroom by the time they made their way in, as well as a lone Slytherin, Severus Snape.
Lily did not acknowledge the presence of her former best friend as she entered the room and took a seat beside Remus. It had been months since she had spoken to Severus, but that didn't stop the pain that rippled through her every time she saw him. He looked unwell, his cheeks sunken and yellowing, his hair hanging unhealthily. She couldn't help but wonder how he had spent his summer. In their early years at Hogwarts, they had spent their holidays together, but their friendship had long since faded. Now he spent his time with his Death Eater friends and she spent time with…Marauders.
If the pain of his betrayal hadn't still been so raw she might have laughed, but as it was, she could still hear the words he had spoken to her eighteen months ago. Mudblood.
She swallowed back the pain in her throat as the potions master, Professor Slughorn, slowly made his way into the classroom, beaming at all of his students. His gaze fell last on Lily, who couldn't help but smile at the professor's enthusiasm. She knew that she was one of his favourite students, and, beyond reason, she was very fond of him in return. She knew his flaws, his surprise at learning she was Muggle-born was one of them, but he was a very good teacher, with very good connections, and it couldn't hurt to occasionally attend the dinner parties he enjoyed throwing.
"Welcome my dear students, to seventh year potions!" He clapped his hands together eagerly, eyes resting on each of them in turn. "So few of you have progressed through to our final year together, but I must say, it is good to see all of my old favourites back."
He beamed at them all and most of them managed to muster a smile back to him. "You're in for a long year, ladies and gentlemen. Or rather, a very short one, considering how much we have to do…"
Lily suppressed a sigh, this would be the fourth time she had heard this speech today. All of her professors seemed to think it was necessary to remind them of the importance of N.E.W.T. year, as if she needed the reminder, as if she wasn't stressed enough already…
"…so we'll jump straight into it. Today you're going to brew a growth potion for me. A strong one at that, the type they use in St Mungo's to re-grown bones and the like, before the invention of Skele-Gro, that is," he said with a hearty laugh. "I'm showing my age, I fear; I dare say none of you remember the days before that remarkable little potion. Regardless, it shouldn't take you long to give it a go. Please remember that this is a Healer level potion and I don't expect you to perfect it in this lesson. Off you trot!" He exclaimed happily.
Lily set to work immediately, flipping her book open and finding the page with the necessary instructions on it. She unpacked her potions kit, immediately set her cauldron brewing and got to work. She was in her element, potions was her best subject, or at least equal with charms, and she didn't want to start they year off badly as she had in Transfiguration. (It hadn't taken a lot of effort on Professor McGonagall's part to correct her mistake with the trunk, and honestly she had never specified that the luggage had to be hair free.) The hour went by faster than any other lesson that day and when Slughorn told them to step away from their cauldrons, she was reasonably confident she had done well. She certainly hoped so. The potion had required constant stirring and the heat from the fire had left a gleam of sweat on her forehead and had caused her previously tame red locks to spring into a riot of frizzy curls. She smoothed them down as Slughorn made his way around the desks. The general consensus seemed to be that everyone had managed a passable potion. Slughorn reached the table before theirs, Snape's and peered into his cauldron.
"You certainly do like to experiment with the instructions don't you m'boy?" Slughorn laughed good-naturedly. "Of course that's the making of a true potioneer, trying to improve what already exists, but I would suggest that, being your N.E.W.T year, you stick to the directions if you intend to get good marks."
Snape sneered at Slughorn's copious retreating backside.
He peered into Remus's potion and commended his effort, he told James that with practice it would improve, but it was a decent first effort. Finally, he looked into Lily's, clapping his hands like a small child.
"A wonderful first attempt. Marvellous, Miss Evans, as usual! Ten points to Gryffindor. I think we're done here, ladies and gentleman; you may leave."
Lily had worked right until the last moment of their allotted time, so she had to hang back to clean up her working area. She wasn't the only one; one of the Ravenclaws whom Lily was friendly with, Marcia Honeyland, Snape, and James were all still packing their things away when Slughorn left the dungeons. Marcia finished first, saying goodbye to Lily and promising to catch up with her soon. Lily noticed that James had finished, but seemed to be waiting for her. She flushed and moved to hurry. They did both have Herbology after all, perhaps it was normal for him to wait for her. Any of her other… friends… would have done the same.
Side by side and without a word Lily and James left the classroom. Halfway up the corridor, Lily sensed eyes trained on her back and turned around. James paused, waiting.
Severus Snape was behind them, looking at James with unveiled loathing.
"You can go you now, Potter," he spat at him. "I just wanted a word with Lily."
"That's fine, Snape, I'll just wait here. Evans and I have Herbology together," James replied, obviously with as much civility as he could muster.
Severus flushed angrily but seemed determined to ignore James. Lily could only imagine the effort they were both exerting to not curse each other.
"What do you want Severus?" She asked coolly.
"I just…wanted to know…how your summer was?"
"Fine. Same as ever."
"I missed you, you know. Summer isn't the same without you. Remember how we used to spend every day at the park?"
Lily did remember, and she too missed the carefree days of dreaming of their next year back at Hogwarts. The memories brought a lump to her throat that she swallowed painfully against. Those days were long gone. Severus had chosen his path and she'd chosen hers, those paths would never meet, different as they were. There was no going back.
"You don't have to hang around Potter and his friends just because all of your girlfriends have left," he told her.
"Not all of my…" She went to say, but he kept talking.
"You could come and hang out with me. I think you'd like my friends if you gave them a chance," he lowered his voice, his eyes wild with anticipation. "They can teach you magic you'd never even…"
Lily fought with the urge to reach for her wand, overpowering as it was. Somehow, she lost the fight, and Severus Snape lay sprawling on the ground some twenty feet away from her, his wand in her hand.
"I am not a Death Eater, I don't want to know any Dark magic and I don't want to be friends with people that do!" She yelled at him, before chucking his wand back at him, turning on her heel, and marching towards James Potter, who looked positively gleeful.
"You cursed him, Evans; I saw you!" He exclaimed. "I promised no hexing and you did it for me! That was brilliant!"
Lily rolled her eyes at him and, still angry, stormed away from him, out of the Entrance Hall and into the sunshine. It was a beautiful day outside but that didn't calm Lily's mood any. She couldn't believe what she'd just done, and in front of James Potter nonetheless! He'd never let her live this down!
((XX))
James let Lily storm ahead of him, still chortling at the sight of her sending Snape flying with the strength of her expelliarmus. He trailed behind her, outside, watching her magnificently red hair, curly from the heat of the potions room, bouncing behind her as she stalked. That was his brilliant, beautiful, fiery girl. He almost burst with pride. She really was more like him then she thought, cursing Snape! He couldn't wait to tell the boys.
He finally allowed himself to catch up with her as they neared the greenhouses. He was only a couple of meters away when he called out to her.
"Evans!"
She turned and glared openly at him.
"Nicely done, Red."
She stared at him and then grinned, looking a little sheepish, but still proud of herself.
He couldn't hold back the laugh that escaped his throat as they entered the greenhouses.
That fiery redhead with the beautiful green eyes and frightening temper, that was his girl.
Or at least, he desperately hoped she would be.
((XX))
The clock has just chimed eleven and Lily was one of the few left in the Common Room, she was struggling with the Herbology essay they'd be assigned that day. Even though it wasn't due for a week she wanted to get it out of the way, she was feeling the pressure of their N.E.W.T year already, essays in every subject! She could have given it up for the night, she had done over half of it already, but secretly, she was waiting for James to get back from his first patrol, she wanted to know how it had gone.
Everyone else had long since said goodnight. Alice was upstairs pouring over her first letter from Frank, Peter had given up on his homework and had gone to bed with a Quidditch magazine and Sirius had snuck off with a sixth year girl some hours ago, refusing to wither under her glare. Personally, she hoped James would interrupt them on his patrol, when he wouldn't have a choice but to give his best friend detention. She smiled grimly at the thought.
It had just ticked over eleven thirty and Lily was beginning to worry, not that she would have admitted that to Remus who sat opposite her working on his Transfiguration essay, his brow furrowed. James should have returned an hour ago, what could possibly be keeping him?
Lily has just resolved to talk Remus into going searching for James when the portrait burst open and James stumbled through. He looked so harried and, was Lily imagining it, or where his eyebrows singed?
Remus was on his feet before James was fully through the portrait hole and Lily followed suit. James raised a hand to them, as if letting them know he was all right, as he caught his breath. Lily sunk back down in her seat, her brain churning. What in the name of Merlin had happened on his patrol?
Remus conjured a goblet of pumpkin juice and handed it to James. Lily envied his calmness; he'd obviously dealt with James in situations like this before.
"Had a duel with some fourth year Slytherins, not a big deal." He told them as he gulped down the juice. He took in Lily's shocked expression and continued. "I saw one of them, out of bounds in the dungeons and followed. They were having some secretive meeting that I was rude enough to interrupt. They weren't very happy with me for breaking up their little tea party and a bit of a scuffle ensued." He couldn't help but grin. "Who says you're the only one that gets to curse Slytherins, Evans?"
Lily rolled her eyes at him, for what felt like the eight hundredth time that day.
"What happened then?"
"Slughorn heard the noise and arrived, eventually. He marched the boys off to Dumbledore and told it was a good thing I was better at duelling than brewing potions." Now it was his turn to roll his eyes. "They were only fourth years." He yawned widely. "Think I might have a shower before bed. Don't study too hard, you two." He winked at them and made his way towards the boys' dormitories.
Lily watched James's retreating back and didn't bother to suppress a sigh as soon as he was out of earshot.
"You're taking this very calmly," she mentioned to Remus.
"When your best friends are James and Sirius, you kind of get used to things like this," he smirked. "Though at least this time it wasn't his fault."
Lily nodded her agreement, at least.
((XX))
By eight the next morning, James and Lily found themselves in Professor Dumbledore's office.
"I will admit to you, James, Lily, that I was deeply disturbed by what occurred last night. Not without some coercion did I manage to discover that the group you disturbed last night James, were planning an attack on Muggle born students, in order to prove themselves to an older group. Apparently they are not the only younger students attempting to impress this group in order to gain admittance to its ranks." Professor Dumbledore looked troubled as he ran a hand over his aging face. "It is quite unbelievable that we ought to be facing something such as this on the second day of the semester, or at all rather. We managed to extract some information about the nature of the group the young men were hoping to join, but nothing else. The teachers and I are acting to resolve this matter as quickly as possible, but until then, we will be very reliant on the two of you, as our Head students, to report anything you hear and to do your best to maintain order in the school. The safety of our students is our first priority, especially when it appears those students with a Muggle heritage are being targeted." His eyes fell to rest on Lily as he said the last.
"What did you want us to do exactly Sir?" She asked anxiously.
"Your main duties will be at night. During the day we ask you to keep your eyes and ears open for any word of trouble, but you will be most useful to us in the evenings. Your prefects will patrol the corridors from eight to ten every night, using whatever rotation scheme you prefer. From ten till midnight we shall ask you to take over the patrol. I know that is quite late, so I have rearranged your timetables to ensure that your morning free period occurs first thing, enabling you to lie in a bit if you so desire. Your other free period will occur during last lesson, allowing you more time to do your days homework. After midnight the teachers will take over, but we do like our leisure time as well you know." His eyes twinkled merrily and Lily couldn't help but smile affectionately in response to her headmaster.
"Most importantly we expect you to patrol together every night. You may substitute occasionally with seventh year prefects if they agree, but it is vital that this task is carried out in pairs." He looked at them over the rims of his half-moon glasses and Lily could never remember seeing their headmaster look so serious. "This is particularly important in regards to you, Miss Evans. Please do not think I doubt your abilities when I say this, but it is vital that you are accompanied on every patrol. You are a brilliant witch, Head Girl, and born to Muggle parents. We would be foolish to think that you will not be a target for these trouble makers schemes."
James saw Lily's eyes widen with surprise, defiance, and a little fear. All of a sudden, James Potter had internally erupted with a burning anger towards any and all pureblood fanatics who harboured any ill thoughts towards his Lily. Under the omniscient gaze of his headmaster, James struggled to bring himself under control.
((XX))
Control was indeed, something that James felt himself struggling with as September drew to an end and October began. Control to keep his manners intact, to be mature, to not hex anybody that didn't deserve it. Control to keep his hands and declarations to himself in those two hours every night he spent alone with Lily Evans every evening. And on a Sunday afternoon in mid September, James felt his control being tempted in a way he had never experienced before.
One could not really describe James Potter and Lily Evans as friends. Though they didn't sit together in most of their classes, they did walk to class together, they ate the occasional meal together and some nights would share a table in the common room to work together. In all these instances they were surrounded by their friends but during their rounds, as they tried to prevent the attacks on Muggle-borns that were still occurring, albeit without frequency, they were alone.
Their conversations as they made their way around the castle in the late hours were about nothing in particular. School work, how tired they were, Quidditch and the weather. James cracked jokes and Lily would occasionally congratulate him on his more mature behaviour. There was nothing significant about them, nothing to make James look forward to it all day, except for the fact that he got to spend time with Lily.
Convincing her that he had changed was harder than anticipated. Six years had ingrained in her the sure knowledge that James Potter was a troublemaker. He didn't want that to change, but he had moved on from anything cruel, he was desperate for her to see what those closest to him saw, the trouble maker with the good heart, who, despite his penchant for trouble, would do anything for those he loved.
So he knew he had to control himself, had to prove to her that he wasn't the immature little boy she thought of him as. But on that Sunday afternoon, James was as far from a little boy as he could ever be.
He had watched her work all weekend, without breaks. Constantly with her head down, constantly working, doing essay after essay, practicing spell after spell. Alice had worked beside her nearly all weekend, but at the delivery of a package from Frank, Alice had been sufficiently distracted, and had managed to distract Lily as well.
"Would you look at what Frank's sent?" James heard Alice laugh from across the common room. "He's in Anatolia for training, but I think he's gone a bit overboard, you'll have to help me eat these Lily."
James snuck a peak from behind his hair to see Alice brandishing a large box in Lily's face.
"It's a good thing I skipped lunch," she laughed and on Alice's insistence reached her hand into the box, grabbed a perfect, red cherry and drew it between her lips.
In that instant, James went to heaven and hell in the same moment,
Because watching Lily Evans open her little pink mouth, put a cherry in whole and work her tongue until the seed and stem where all that remained was pure torture. Sweet, delirious, intoxicating, arousing torture. A drop of cherry juice slid down her chin and, with a laugh, she caught it and sucked her finger into her mouth.
James's desire erupted like a volcano, it seemed she was determined to be the death of him. The year it had been since he had last touched a woman stretched painfully behind him and suddenly he was desperate for the feeling of lips on his, a body in his arms, the exquisite feeling of release. But he'd given that all up, long before the conversation with his father, because no matter how much he'd pretended, he'd realised halfway through sixth year that he couldn't delude himself any longer, he could no longer pretend that the hands that cupped him, the bodies that he moved in, the lips that harshly smacked against his, were Lily's. Because the school sluts that had readily given themselves to him could never be compared to the loving innocence that making love to Lily would be.
He shook his head to clear it as she bit into another cherry. Though he appeared to be wrapped in his potions textbook, he was actually observing every of her movements with rapt attention, as he ached for release.
Because watching Lily Evans eat a cherry was better than pounding into a thousand different girls. Watching Lily Evans eat a cherry was like making love.
((XX))
Welcome once again and thank you for reading.
To those of you who reviewed chapter one and didn't receive your sneak peak of this chapter, I apologise, technological issues stopped me from delivering what I promised. However I believe I've fixed the problem and can hopefully send a preview of next chapter to all those who review.
Thanks as always to my wonderful team, Casey and Kait, I couldn't continue to publish this without you both and your zombie-like tendencies.
Remember, reviews are love. James loves reviews.
Have a safe and happy week everybody!
SC.