When morning came Shizuo yawned and stretched. He supposed that he should go get the three of them up, but when he tried to open the door, he found that it was blocked. "What the hell?" Using his strength, he merely pushed the door, dresser with it, open. "Oi. Morning. Get up."
Izaya started awake and looked very tense when the block was moved but he relaxed when he remembered where they were.
"A-ah... right we're walking aren't we... no... I have to skip today," Izaya sighed. He hated to do it but he needed to get his sisters enrolled. They couldn't be left on their own.
Shizuo frowned but sighed. "Fine. I'm getting us all cereal and then I'm going to school."
Izaya nodded and got the twins up, though they were frightened by Shizuo's display of strength since their parents had never made it past Izaya's blockade and they had tried several times.
Shizuo made his way to the kitchen before getting four bowls out and pouring the cereal. Then he sat down to eat, waiting for the other three to get there and eat.
Izaya got the twins dressed first though he had worn his clothing to bed with nothing else to wear. He got them both seated at the table though he acted very much like a mother hen too.
Shizuo didn't really care. They were Izaya's sisters, not his. When he finished, he put his bowl in the sink before grabbing his backpack and heading towards the front door. "I'm leaving now. Bye." And with that, he closed the door, on his way to school.
Izaya sighed and got the twins to walk with him to the elementary school. He went to the principle, told him they needed to transfer in from another school; he would forge the documents later.
Izaya was pleased that they started tomorrow and took them home before playing a few simple games like they always played. The twins hid and Izaya hunted them out and pretended to eat their stomachs when he found them -and they always hid together.
Shizuo sighed as he got home. It was kind of a stressful day, with a lot of people whispering about how he had beaten Izaya up again. Damn it! That hadn't been him and he hadn't ever been able to catch the flea fairly. "I'm home." He called it as he opened the door as to not surprise the three.
He was greeted with a break in laughter. Izaya had been blowing on Mairu's stomach when he'd come in and then he grinned widely at Shizuo.
"Shizu-chan~, welcome back~"
Well that was an unexpected way to come back. And the three of them seemed so happy. "Uh Yeah. You guys look like you're having fun." He made his way to the table. Time to do some homework.
Mairu hurried over to Shizuo then and tugged his pant leg, Kururi right behind her.
"Iza-nii says we say thanks to you for letting us stay with you~"
"Thanks... Shizuo-san..." Kururi said right after Mairu was done.
Shizuo smiled and ruffled both twins' hair. "You're welcome you two." He glanced up towards Izaya. "And you're welcome too."
Izaya nodded to Shizuo before playing more games with the twins, two easily entertained though it was obvious that Izaya was very good with young children.
Shizuo smiled softly before sitting down at the table and getting his homework out. Time to work on it. Then either a snack or maybe read a book till dinner. There hadn't been anything in the mail, so he knew the money would be there the next day.
Izaya was able to keep them going until he made dinner, though it was just eggs as Shizuo didn't have much. He made plenty for Shizuo to eat too.
Shizuo smiled and thanked Izaya. It meant that he hadn't had to cook. The eggs were good too, and he enjoyed them. After everyone finished eating, he stretched before washing the dishes and then heading to his room. Sure, it was early, but he was tired.
Izaya went to bed too though again he blocked the door. This time though he made sure to be up before Shizuo and have breakfast ready.
When Shizuo woke up, he was surprised to see Izaya already up and breakfast done. "Why'd you get up so early flea? And you don't have to cook."
"I don't have to... think of it as payment then..." Izaya offered, "And I'm up early because I hate waking up to... never mind..." Izaya divided the eggs up and then got his sisters up for their first day of school.
Shizuo sighed but accepted the fact as he sat down to eat the eggs. Fine. Izaya could cook for him if he wanted to.
Besides, once there was more food Izaya could cook much more and much better than he was. The twins were groggy and quiet but they ate and Izaya grabbed his own bag long before Shizuo would be leaving... well, more like twenty minutes.
Then again, Izaya had to bring his sisters to school before heading to school himself, so it wasn't unusual. Shizuo didn't really care. He left for school when he usually did.
Izaya wound up meeting Shizuo at the gate though he merely nodded to the blonde and went into the school This time though he denied that Shizuo had beaten him up and told them he was hit by a car.
Shizuo frowned, knowing that that wasn't the reason, but said nothing. He merely ignored Izaya for the duration of the school day.
At least Izaya was clearing Shizuo's name... something he had never done before. Another act out of gratitude but things were no different in his personality. At home with the twins the teen was energetic and happy but at school or after they went to bed he was somber and quiet and very withdrawn. He was also starting to smoke more and to support that he was starting to work... not that the school knew. It wasn't exactly legal but Izaya was able to at least pay his and the twins share of the room freeing up money for Shizuo.
Soon, Shizuo knew something wasn't right. If Izaya really was happy, he wouldn't be so sullen at school. So one day, when Izaya was on the roof, before he started to smoke, Shizuo approached. "Will you quit being so sullen and depressed already?" Probably wasn't the best thing to ask, but it was all he had.
Izaya blinked at him and laughed though it was a very different one from what he did near the twins. "Quit being depressed? Do you hear yourself?" He asked, lighting up anyways to inhale.
Shizuo scowled and knocked it away from Izaya. "I don't see why you're depressed, is all. You aren't with your parents and no one is pressuring you anymore."
"Oh you think it's that easy to fix do you? So tell me then Shizuo, what makes you the god damn expert huh? How many times have you been beaten and raped?" Izaya snapped now. He was sick of this; he hated people thinking that he could just 'get over' whatever was bothering him.
Shizuo's scowl only deepened. "I never said I was an expert. And why haven't you asked for help? It's not like no one would. But maybe I shouldn't care at all if that's how you want to act." Shizuo huffed, angry and not thinking about what he was saying before turning to leave. The flea was the flea. Didn't matter about that. At least it didn't while he was angry.
"Do you... do even have any idea of what it's like?" Izaya asked, his voice shaking now, "Do you have any idea how hard it was to even admit that it happened to myself? And you expect me to just go in and tell some stranger that I lost my virginity when I was five years old to a guy who was fifty six and paid my parents a million yen to fuck me?! That I then had to see two men a fucking until I was twelve? No, because when I was twelve I should be able to take more, should I?! I should be able to handle four a night! And to top it off if my grades aren't perfect I get the shit beat out of me, I talk back? Same fucking thing! Not to mention if Mairu or Kururi did something wrong I had to keep them from hitting them! They wouldn't understand because I sure as hell didn't when I was their age! You try doing that for a while and see if you can just tell any fucking person on the street! See if you can deal with everything day to day without some form of escapism!"
Shizuo's scowl only deepened. "No wonder you're so fucked up, if that's what you had to deal with." Well, if he didn't want to tell a stranger, then he had to help. But he didn't know how.
Izaya's expression changed, but only slightly. Sadder somehow. "Ne... Shizu-chan really hates me doesn't he..." He mumbled to himself, walking back to the edge of the building now to look down. It wouldn't be too hard... to just jump...
Shizuo frowned. "Oi. Izaya. What are you doing?" If it was something stupid... Shizuo frowned more as he walked closer, ready to spring into action if Izaya did do something stupid.
"Do you hate me? It's a simple question you know..." Izaya replied, sitting down near the edge rather than looking right over it now. He wanted to put Shizuo at ease after all.
Shizuo frowned lightly, thinking. Did he hate Izaya? Well, after hearing the full extent of what had happened to Izaya and figuring out why he acted like he did, Shizuo didn't think he did. It'd just be... he couldn't. It wasn't the raven's fault. Shizuo shook his head. "No. After hearing all that, I can't."
Izaya blinked and then smiled, "I don't hate you either Shizu-chan..." Maybe he would stop hiding things though... if Shizuo asked a question he wouldn't not mention it... he would say it outright why he did something one way or another.
"Shizu-chan... I can't... figure anything out anymore... I hated living you know... and with you I think... it could be fun... it should be fun... somehow though it isn't... I don't know what's wrong with me... I don't... I don't want to live..."
"You just need to see what it's supposed to be like first, Izaya." He frowned, thinking. "Izaya, how have you been getting your money? I'm curious."
Izaya laughed at that though again it was missing something. "I did what my parents did... I sold me... though I'm finding many of them prefer information to sex so I'll switch to that... pays better too"
Shizuo scowled, his eyes narrowing slightly. "Don't. Don't do either of those anymore. Selling your body will just make you miserable, and you'd have to leave your sisters or something if you sold information. After all, a lot of yazuka assholes would want info and would use anything against you or something like that."
Izaya scowled at the blonde teen. "And what do I do then? School prevents me from any legal jobs and I can't ask you to pay for everything... you don't even want me there!"
Shizuo scowled. "Why do you care if I do or not? I said I'd let you stay there until you can get your own place, so don't fuck it up!"
Izaya blinked at him and frowned a little, "You... you're really alright paying for my sisters and I to live there?" He asked his voice soft and with a hint of defeat.
Shizuo nodded with a bit of a frown. "Of course I am. Else I wouldn't have offered and I wouldn't have called my parents to ask for more money a month."
"And they're alright...? How much did... you tell them exactly?" Izaya rubbed his own shoulder apprehensively.
"I didn't tell then any amount. All I said is that I have to let three people live with me because of certain circumstances, which I didn't tell them, and they started sending me five hundred and fifty dollars a month. Just to be sure, I guess."
"They pay the rent separately huh?" He muttered.
A mutter Shizuo heard. He nodded. "Yeah. Guess they don't think I can or would rather be safe than sorry."
Izaya stood and then walked over to Shizuo, though he was pouting, "I'm not going to get over it..." he mumbled softly. It wasn't that easily.
Shizuo scowled. "You gonna try?" He'd leave it if Izaya said he would, but if not then, he didn't know.
"I... don't know how... I don't know how to ... I don't know how to do anything anymore... everything..." His voice was getting high as he tried not to cry but tears brimmed anyways.
"Everything I've ever known is a lie..."
Shizuo blinked, seeing the tears beginning to well up in Izaya's eyes. He's not going to cry... is he? Though it was apparent that he was. "You just need to ask someone for help, that's all."
"I don't kn-know how! I t-tried to b-b-before you know b-but no one b-believed it! I d-d-don't even w-wanna live a-anymore!"
Shizuo frowned before speaking softly. "Izaya. It might seem that way, but what if you just left your sister's? They don't really know me that well." He frowned a little deeper now. "How about this. If you keep on living, I'll do my absolute best to not lose my temper around you and attack. And if you want, I'll try and help." He didn't know what he was saying.
Izaya couldn't help it now and his arms wrapped around the others body and hugged him.
Shizuo's eyes widened, surprised. He hadn't expected the raven to hug him. Slowly and hesitantly, he wrapped his arms around Izaya's frame, trying to comfort him. Izaya needed it, he needed the hug, he needed to cry and he needed Shizuo.
Shizuo frowned lightly. He didn't know what to do. Not at all. Plus, they were still at school and it was lunch. "Izaya, we should probably wait until after school to talk more about this, unless you want others to find out."
Izaya sniffed and shook his head, "I j-just stay here... t-till I calm down..." He didn't want people to see him like this either.
Shizuo nodded. "Okay. I will. Why don't we eat lunch together? It might be a good start."
Izaya blinked and then nodded slowly, wiping his eyes now and trying to smile but it was weak... weak but with a hint on genuine feeling too.
Shizuo smiled too before moving towards a shaded area and sitting down before opening his bento box.
Izaya sat with him, but he didn't eat lunch... he never had and he had hated the thought of eating Shizuo's food.
Shizuo glanced over at him. "Where's your lunch?"
"I... don't think I've ever eaten lunch..." He didn't weigh enough either, his ribs and spine were far too visible when his shirt was off, though his skin still so badly bruised it was hard to tell.
Shizuo scowled before he started to divide his lunch into two halves. "You get half then."
Izaya blinked, "But you'll be hungry won't you?"
"A bit, yeah. But you need food. Besides, it's only today, then you'll have your own lunch and I can have a snack when we get home." He would have said I, but they were both staying at his place.
"Alright..." Izaya ate uncertainly, though hungrily.
Shizuo just rolled his eyes as he ate his half of the meal. Certainly, he was glad no one else was up on the roof with them. It'd seem like they were a couple that way.
Shizuo was definitely nicer than a lot of people gave him credit for. Izaya was grateful too and he did thank the other, though nervously.
Shizuo rolled his eyes. "It's nothing Izaya. Let's just finish eating and then get back to class."
Izaya was done long before Shizuo though, he never ate enough though he would start to now.
When Shizuo finished, he wrapped up his bento box before standing. "Alright. I'm heading to class. You gonna come?"
"I probably should huh?" Izaya mumbled, getting up though he felt shaky and unstable. He needed a drink badly but he knew Shizuo would get pissed off if he mentioned he might also be an alcoholic at this point.
Shizuo nodded. "Yeah. Anyway. I'm gonna head down now. So come on." He started towards the door that led off the roof.
Izaya sighed and followed the blonde, hands in his pockets as he went. He felt guilty and like he was taking advantage of Shizuo, but really this had been the only person he could go to... and that depressed him more.
Shizuo didn't notice. At least, not at this moment. He just went back to class and took a seat, waiting for the day to be over.
Izaya went to his classes and paid attention for the most part, gathered his things and headed off. He had to pick up Mairu and Kururi but they were starting to ask why Shizuo didn't come too because they liked him... He was nice...
Shizuo didn't come because they were Izaya's sisters, and he hadn't been asked to go pick them up too. After school, he just headed home and waited for the three Orihara's to get back.
"Shizuo-san! We're home~!" Mairu ran in the door to hug Shizuo's leg without waiting for Izaya to help with her backpack.
"Home..." Kururi mumbled quietly from the door as Izaya got her bag off. Izaya was using only one shoulder for his bag because his arm was still encased in plaster, they had not been there long.
Shizuo smiled and grinned when they got back. "Welcome home you three. Mairu, Kururi, did you two have a good day at school?"
"Yeah! Shizuo-san should come with us in the mornings and pick us up with Izaya-nii though, cuz we like Shizuo-san!"
Shizuo blinked a couple of times, surprised. "Well, only if it's alright with your brother."
"It's fine..." Izaya agreed, smiling a little at the thought. It meant the walk to school would be less lonely anyways...
"Alright then. Starting tomorrow, I'll walk with you guys to and from school. Now. Who wants a snack?"
"Me! I do!"
"Me..." Kururi mumbled in agreement as Izaya tried to get a wiggly Mairu out of her back pack now.
Shizuo chuckled lightly. "What about you, Izaya? You want a snack too?"
"Sure... yeah..." He hoped that was alright anyways...
Shizuo just nodded before heading into the kitchen. He looked around. Cheese sticks and goldfish crackers would work. He got two bowls of the crackers and got out four cheese sticks before walking back into the main room. "Snacks. Don't make a mess."
Izaya supervised the twins and ate a little as well before helping them with their homework and playing with them a little.
Shizuo smiled before going to do his own homework. Once he was done, he walked up to the three Orihara's. "Okay. Mairu, Kururi, go play with each other in your room for a bit. Me and Izaya gotta talk." Might as well start helping him now.
"Okay Shizuo-san~!" Mairu cheered, grabbing her sister's wrist and tugging her into the room they shared with their brother. Izaya fidgeted nervously, not entirely sure what Shizuo planned.
Once they left, Shizuo sighed and turned to Izaya. "Alright. I'm gonna try to help you a bit now. Was what you told me on the roof everything, or is there more?"
"I... dunno... I guess that... I mean if..." Izaya wasn't even sure what he had told Shizuo.
Shizuo sat down on the couch with a sigh. "What is it? You can tell me. I won't tell anyone."
"I guess I should just say everything huh..." he mumbled. It would be hard to talk about a lot of it, but he knew he had to eventually too...
Shizuo sighed. "Alright. How about this? You tell about the more recent or easier to talk about stuff, and we'll start there. After we finish with those, we'll move onto either stuff a bit harder for you to talk about or less recent, alright?"
Izaya shook his head, "Easier to start at the start... with everything in order I think..." He mumbled softly.
Shizuo nodded. "Alright. Tell me what you want, and I'll help with what I can."
"I guess then I start with the earliest thing I can remember... I was four, I don't know what happened to me before then but I assume it was similar to how it happened with Mairu and Kururi... I would get hit if I did something wrong and I never left the house... My parents... brought someone home with them... he was older than they were and I didn't like him very much but they said... that I had to do whatever he said... he took me... back to m-my room..." Izaya had to take a deep, shuddering breath, "He m-made me take all my clothing off and then he... started to... touch me..." Izaya curled up in a small ball now, his legs at his chest and his arms hugging them to himself.
"He tied me up and he raped me... I couldn't even... I didn't understand what was happening but I was scared... I couldn't m-move because it hurt so much and he kept... he kept saying I liked it because whores liked these things... I... I saw him hand my parents the money and leave and then... they locked me in my room the rest of the night..." He needed to breathe now... the memory was bringing back the fear he felt as a child.
Shizuo frowned and without really thinking, he pulled Izaya close into a hug. He knew that the raven needed it. He frowned a bit more, thinking. That happened when he was four? Shit. It's good he and his sisters got out then. "Sssh. Izaya. It's alright. Nothing that man said to you was true." His voice was quiet. He really didn't have any idea at all how to help.
Izaya wasn't sure why but he felt safer somehow with Shizuo and curled right into him with a small sniffle.
"After that night... I... the next day I got to go outside for the first time... I didn't see anyone the next week, but I wasn't allowed out after that day either and... And then the next one came. After the second time one came every evening to use me... no matter how much I begged or screamed no one... no one stopped it... no one ever came to help me... if I tried to hide or run away from the men my parents would beat me and then give me to them... I bit one of the men once... that was the night before I started locking my door and blocking it. I was seven... right before I had started school my parents said I was never to talk about what home was like. I was taught what to say if people asked what I did on vacations or the weekend... I... I hated it... and I started to hate people... and me... I thought that everyone was like the men and my parents... and I thought that meant I had to do that too one day... the night I bit one of the men my father came into my room and broke my arm... b-before he raped me too... Mom held me down when I tried to get away from him..."
Shizuo held Izaya a bit tighter, just barely being mindful as to not squeeze him too hard. He was angry. Beyond angry. But not at Izaya. No, not at Izaya. At his parents. "Those sick fucks."
"After that night I always moved my dresser in front of the door..." He shuddered lightly. "When I was nine my mother got pregnant with twins... Mairu and Kururi... it was around then that I found... I stole food usually from the fridge... my parents didn't feed me after I was six so I stole food from the fridge and one day when I was nine I stole beer by mistake... I got drunk for the first time... it was the best feeling I had ever known at the time... so I stole more... I was drinking a lot... I hated Mairu and Kururi when they were born... I hated them for existing... I wondered why they would want to be born when all they would do was suffer like I did... I even decided back then that I would hurt them sooner... so they didn't have a stranger hurting them first... and then... Then they were born and I knew... I couldn't hurt them... so... I would protect them instead... I would keep them safe when the beatings started, I would stop them from being sold... I knew I had about four years until then anyways... my parents sold me twice as often after they were born, my tenth... my tenth birthday I had to see four men instead of two..."
Shizuo's frown only deepened. "You never have to do any of that again. And your sisters will never have to either. I promise. I promise that if I can, I won't let stuff like that happen anymore."
"I know..." Izaya smiled a little and nuzzled his chest softly. Shizuo smelled nice...
"When they were four I hid them when their first client showed up even though Dad broke my arm again... and he made me take their place but I didn't care... because if I did it then they didn't have to... I would break something or insult my parents when they would start going after Mairu or Kururi for something. I came here because they were going to sell them anyways... the client was on his way and I couldn't... I knew that no matter what I did it would happen if they stayed there..."
"You did what was right, Izaya. They're safe and that won't happen to them. But... I have to say something. Technically, your parents could come here to take you and your sisters back. If they do... I'm calling the cops, alright?" The twins would most likely be taken somewhere else to be raised. Izaya may or may not stay with Shizuo in that condition, but it'd be better than letting them go back to the parents.
Izaya nodded quietly but he knew his parents were not going to come after them. "They said we were the worst thing that ever happened to them... so we should let them sell our bodies to make up for ruing their lives..."
"That is never true. Kids are supposed to be the best thing that happen. I think that your parents are the worst thing to ever happen to you and your sisters. Not the other way around." He had hated Izaya at first glance without even getting to know him. He regretted that.
Izaya sighed softly and smiled a little, "I only took drugs and drank because it made me feel good... I don't know how else to feel okay..." But Shizuo seemed to be helping too.
"Please. No more drugs or drinking. It isn't healthy for you." He hadn't started smoking yet, but had he and Izaya been on bad terms for any longer, he might have started.
"I know it isn't... I..." He sighed, "I don't know what else to do... when you ratted me out to the principle... I tried to lie my way out of it but... it didn't work so well I guess..."
Shizuo frowned lightly. "I'm sorry. I didn't know that'd happen. I was just sick and tired of you ticking me off and making me lose my temper. If I had known, I wouldn't have." He paused, thinking. "You can come for me for anything. If you have to, pull me out of class or something."
"You mean it?" He asked his eyes wide at the other. He grinned then, his smile genuine and he hugged the other tight now.
Shizuo chuckled lightly and nodded. "Yeah. I mean it. After all, I'm trying to help, right? Anyway, I think that's enough for today. Tomorrow after school, we'll do this same thing. Alright?"
"Mmn... alright..." Izaya sighed, but he wanted to stay right where he was now too.
"It's about dinner time. I'll cook tonight. What do you want?" If he didn't know how to make it, he'd just grab one of his cook books.
"Anything... " He said honestly, "I'll go get my sisters so they don't feel like they have to be in our room..."
Shizuo nodded as he made his way to the kitchen. Anything? He'd just make some omelets then. They cooked relatively fast and tasted good.
Izaya fetched his sisters who were none the wiser about what Shizuo and Izaya had talked about moments ago. They wanted to help Shizuo so Izaya helped them grate some cheese carefully.
Shizuo smiled softly and soon enough, the omelets were cooked and done. Shizuo set out plates and the omelets out before getting four cups and pouring everyone milk. "Alright. Let's eat up."
Izaya helped Mairu and Kururi with theirs and wiped their faces though he teased them about making messes and made them giggle.
Shizuo smiled. The scene was adorable. And after they were all done eating, Shizuo went to wash the dishes. After all, he had cooked.
"Ne Shizu-chan, you cooked so let me clean okay~?" Izaya offered, moving so he could take over -though naturally if Izaya was doing something the twins wanted to help.
Shizuo chuckled lightly. "Only if you really want to, alright?"
Izaya nodded and he helped Mairu and Kururi help him clean up the dishes -though he had to clean up the mess with water they ended up making in the process- and then the twins went Shizuo-hunting.
Shizuo was in the living room, watching TV. He smiled at the two of them. "You guys look like you played in the water."
"Yeah! It was fun and bubbly!" Mairu cheered, climbing onto the seat next to Shizuo.
"...Fun..." Kururi mumbled climbing up next to her sister as Izaya joined them, sitting beside Kururi.
Shizuo chuckled lightly and shook his head before changing the channel to something the twins would enjoy.
Both of them were asleep in under an hour though and Izaya sighed softly, picking Kururi up carefully to carry her into their room. He would be back for Mairu who was now drooling on Shizuo's arm in her sleep.
Shizuo was a bit irritated at the drool, but Mairu was a kid and sleeping. It was fine. He sighed softly after both twins were in bed. "You wanna head to bed to, or talk more about what we had earlier?"
"Not tired yet... you can... you can ask questions too you know..." Izaya wasn't going to hide anything, not from Shizuo anyways.
Shizuo shook his head. "I think it's better for you to let everything out first. Then whatever I have questions on, I can ask."
Izaya shrugged one shoulder, "I'm not really sure what else is left..." He hadn't really gotten into the beatings and the constant verbal abuse, but he wasn't sure exactly where to start with that either.
"Alright. So beatings and rape. Did they tell you stuff like you were worthless or anything?"
"Hah! All the time... they said I never did anything for them and I was ungrateful because they did so much for me... and they said I was stupid, if I got anything less than perfect grades I was worthless... stupid and useless..." Izaya was blinking hard now to stop himself from crying. He really wanted to... he probably needed too... but when he had cried before now he would be beaten and called ungrateful and a whore...
"Izaya... You aren't any of those things. Every life has value. You've cared for you sisters and kept them safe. You aren't stupid. You get your homework done fast and it's still perfect." Shit. He probably did need help for this. But telling anyone else the situation without Izaya's permission would ruin trust.
Izaya really did cry now with Shizuo's words and hugged the blonde teen tightly, his face burying into the taller teen's chest with a whimper.
Shizuo blinked a couple of times before wrapping his arms around Izaya. The raven was just so vulnerable. It didn't seem right. "Sssh. Sssh. It's alright Izaya." A bit hesitantly, he moved one of his hands so that he was stroking the back of Izaya's head.
Izaya's breath came in small shuddering gasps and his arms clung to Shizuo as though he were clinging for dear life. He had flinched with the first touch to his head but it was the only time he did so. Somehow he kept himself quiet, not wanting to wake his sisters up.
Shizuo shifted himself and Izaya until they were both laying on the couch. It was easier and more comfortable. Shizuo's eyes shut as he continued to run his hand through Izaya's hair soothingly. "It's alright Izaya."
It wasn't alright... but Izaya was starting to believe that it would be, someday... Shizuo was so kind to him, Izaya didn't know how to handle it now... he'd always liked Shizuo, liked him a lot in fact but he didn't understand what he really felt now... because he wanted Shizuo like he had never wanted anything before. He wanted Shizuo forever.
After a bit, Shizuo let out a soft sigh. "Let's get to bed, alright Izaya? I think that instead of after school for these, we'll wait until your sisters are sleeping."
Izaya sniffled and nodded, though now that he was done he was a little embarrassed about crying so much. His eyes were red and puffy and his sinuses were full now too, crying was messy and ugly after all.
Shizuo smiled lightly and ran his hand through Izaya's hair one last time. "Good night Izaya. See you in the morning." With that, he stood and headed to his room to change into night clothes and then fall asleep.
Izaya sighed softly, splashed some water on his face and then went to bed though tonight, for the first time in a very long while, he left the door unbarred.