I am her protector I told myself for the hundredth time. I was in the basement shaking like there was a demon inside me. I couldn't protect her. Me. Me. Me. It is my fault she is sad. Why is she crying? Why can't I make her laugh again? Is she afraid of me? Did she find it out? Thousand questions spinning in my mind like a roller coaster that makes me sick. Why was I even questioning if she was afraid of me when I was afraid of going up there and actually talking to her and maybe even see her laugh again? This time I would be making her laugh instead of crying. I counted the stairs as I went up. I was breathing heavily when I finally got the courage to go in. She was there crying again. Tears were dropping down like little precious diamonds. Every tear that fell down to her lap made me want to go grab a container and collect all the tears that fell down and tell her how important they were and that she shouldn't be spending them recklessly. So I finally went by her and sat next to her instead of thinking by myself. "Your nose looks cute when you cry but I like your eyes better when they're dryer." She laughed. "I just want you to know that I am really sorry I didn't come to make you laugh before." I said in a sincere tone. "Are you not going to ask me what's wrong?" she said in a cracky voice like she has been crying her lungs out. "No, you'll tell me when you want to. Why would I bother you with these classic old questions like are you okay when you are not? Why would I be reminding you that something is not okay? I will never pressure you to say anything. You will tell me if you really want to." I did kind of talk a lot but that was what I really felt. She just said "Thank you." But that one thank you was more than words. Those were words came alongside with several emotions that included relief. She felt like she was understood. And that was all I could do. I knew it now. I didn't need to think to myself why she was crying because what she really needs is love. A love that I have for her that not even I can tell why. The connection is more powerful than I ever thought. I never thought I was capable of such love. Now I know.