Thank you to those who have read and reviewed my story so far! I don't have the access yet to reply to you guys since I'm a new user, but I hope you guys know how much that means to me. Anyway, here's the second and final chapter to my story. I've decided to write it in Jake's POV. Enjoy!
Jake finally opened his eyes. The first feeling he registered was pain, in every joint and bone in his body. He could hardly move. As he squinted to refocus his sight, he began to take in his surroundings. This wasn't his house. He was in a girl's room, a room all too familiar to him…and it all came rushing back.
The breakup. Clay. The fight. Marley. Marley…
Jake's body shot upwards to see where she was. If she was okay. His breathing became more labored.
As if on instinct, the door slowly creaked open and in walked Marley, carrying a first aid kit and a mug, looking tired and restless. When their eyes met, he could see her eyes widen with surprise as well as relief.
"Jake…" her voice quivered. She put her things down and engulfed Jake in a warm hug, rubbing his back and whispering a chorus of 'it's okay's. Jake didn't say a word, pulling her body tighter against his as he felt sobs threatening to rise within his chest. He couldn't cry and show her his weakness. She's already seen too much.
But her hands went to stroking his hair and his last shred of self-control snapped as he finally let himself break down.
She never let go of him, not even once. And just like that, his walls crumbled down to pieces. She was the only one who could do that, he realized. Jake had always marveled her strength and compassion, but never as much as he did now. Why was she being so kind to him after all that he had done to her?
After a good half an hour, Jake finally found it in him to stop his tears. When he pulled back to look at her eyes, he still saw it. That sorrow etched in them before he blacked out. He wanted nothing but for the tiny gold flecks to swim in them again, but he was the one who caused her that pain. He fought the urge to reach up and stroke her cheek. "Marley…" he began.
Marley didn't say a word, strongly holding his gaze. She was waiting.
"Why? You…you hate me. But now you're taking care of me." Jake uttered the only thought in his mind, only realizing how stupid it sounded a second later. But it was true. He broke her, and there she was yet again, saving him.
Marley sighed. "Just because we're not together anymore, doesn't mean I don't want you to be safe."
Jake's jaw clenched at that. He knows they're no longer together, but having her say it, even after all these months, just made it even more painful to him.
He was surprised when she placed her fingers on his chin to meet his eyes. "Jake, what happened back there? You know you can't get into fights anymore. Word about this is going to get to school somehow very soon, and then Principal Figgins will find out. Please don't get into fights anymore."
Jake released a breath he didn't know he was holding. "Those guys were fucking out of line, Marley." And just like that, he felt anger rise within him again.
But then Marley touched his arm, and it simmered down a little.
"Look, I don't know what they said, but all I know is that I want you to get better. We're still friends, Jake," she said.
Something about her last words sounded…strained. Like she was trying to convince herself instead of him.
"Marley, those guys were talking shit about your mom. Called her names they had no right to." He didn't tell her the other part of what Clay had said to him. Jake felt himself shaking again, suddenly livid with himself. Why can't he get a grip on himself?
"Jake, it's okay…you've always been kind to my mom and she knows that. You didn't need to get into a fight or anything like that to defend her honor," reasoned Marley.
Jake looked down again, not daring to meet her eyes. He was ashamed of himself. Even as friends, or whatever she calls it, he still managed to make her disappointed in him.
"Jake…is there more to this than you're letting on? I can see you tensing up…" said Marley. She noticed. She kept a slow circuit of running her hands up and down his arms.
He knew he had to tell her. They were at a point in their relationship in which nothing he said could possibly make anything worse than they already are, so he might as well tell her. He forced himself to sit upright, ignoring the pain. "They told me I was hung up over you."
Marley suddenly stopped her ministrations. "You still shouldn't have done anything, Jake." she said softly, not meeting his eyes.
A rather uncomfortable silence settled between them. There was an elephant in the room demanding to be addressed, but neither of them even wanted to go there. Maybe except for Jake…he doesn't know about her, but he knew that this is enough. He knew he had caused enough pain to rift within them and he wanted—no, needed—it to stop. He needs to patch it up between them, even though he might never get her back the way he wants.
Marley beat him to it before he could even say a word. "You know what? Let's get you cleaned up first." She was avoiding any talk about it.
She opened the first aid kit and began to clean his bruises. Jake couldn't believe it; here was the girl he admittedly cheated on for his own foolish reasons, and she was still taking care of him like this. She shouldn't want to do this for him. He was supposed to be the guy she wanted out of her life. He couldn't help but love her all the more, even if she might no longer want it.
He let her put an ice bag under his nose and apply some rubbing alcohol on his bruises painstakingly, trying to ignore how it stung. And during those seemingly short minutes, neither of them said a word. Jake didn't know how much longer he could take this.
"Marley…"
"You shouldn't have done anything," she cut him off for the second time tonight, "if you didn't, none of this would have happened. You're not hung up on me, so why—"
Jake could hear the anger seeping through her voice as her tone gradually increased. His eyebrow was raised as he knew she was wrong about one thing.
"What if I am hung up on you? Marley, you can't keep pretending that this isn't happening. I still love you," he said, with absolute certainty in his voice.
Marley's look immediately became hard. "If you loved me, you wouldn't have…" her voice cracked.
He knew she couldn't even bear to say it. "I was reckless, I was an ass, and most of all, I was stupid. I was stupid enough to let myself hurt you. And I hate myself for that. I hate myself for being the reason that you cry, and I hate myself for taking that beautiful smile away from your face. But everything I've ever felt for you is the most real thing I've ever experienced. You taught me how to love and how to be kind, and…I was so, so stupid to let that go. I'm so sorry for everything, Marley…I can understand if you don't want to give me another chance, but you have to know that I'm absolutely sorry for everything that I've done."
Jake's heart broke when he saw a lone tear escape her eye. He reached to wipe it away from her cheek, not caring if he crossed any boundaries. He took the opportunity to continue when he saw that she still hadn't said anything.
"Marley, you don't know how ruined I am when we broke up. Yes, I've made some more mistakes after that but that was to protect myself from everything I was feeling. I screwed up big time. I tried some things I shouldn't have and didn't give a fuck about anything anymore. It didn't make anything better. Ever since we broke up, it's like everything is pointless. I need you, Marley."
Marley finally looked back at him, her bottom lip trembling. "You have no idea how things have been with me, Jake. Ever since I found out from her," yes, he knew she also couldn't bring herself to say her name, "I felt worthless. Like I was nothing. I still do. I thought I've found someone who can finally see through me behind my ugly and someone who can love me for that, but apparently I wasn't good enough for you. And I'll never be good enough for you. You have no idea what I've gone through after that, Jake."
She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, accidentally letting the bottom part of her shirt ride upwards. Jake caught a glimpse of her bare stomach and his heart dropped to his stomach. He could see some of the bones sticking out against her skin. To think that he loved her body and helped her see it the way he did, but to know that he was the one who caused her to hate it all over again made him sick.
"Marley, look at me. I am so sorry. I know nothing I do will ever be good enough to make it up to you, but I love you. I want to make you feel special and beautiful and loved again. I made a mistake, and I…I need you to forgive me so I can show you just how much I feel for you." Jake looked at her eyes desperately, suddenly wanting her to forgive him so the ache in his chest can subside.
"I don't know, Jake…you're the best thing I've ever had too, but after this I just…can't trust my heart anymore. It's if the things I thought were true are finally being proved wrong too,"
More tears slipped down her pale face. Without thinking, Jake framed her face with his big hands and stroked her cheeks, wiping the tears away from her face.
"Your feelings are true, and so are mine. You're the only girl I'll ever want, Marley, and my foolish pride took over. I swear to God, Marley, these are the truest words I've ever said. You have to believe me."
When Marley finally looked at him again, he tried to read her eyes. From the beginning, her eyes drew him in instantly. They could be an open book and he could read everything about her off of them, but they can also be mysterious and hide their secrets seconds later. Now, it seemed as if they were scrutinizing him. Trying to figure him out, trying to figure out what to do. He's never quite seen them like this before.
After what seemed like forever, she finally spoke up again, her voice still trembling, "I don't know if I should trust you. Or anyone, to lay my feelings out on the line again. But I want to make sure—I need to make sure…
"Look at me in the eyes, tell me you love me, and kiss me."
Jake's heart was pounding so hard he swore it can fly across his ribcage. When he heard her request, he subconsciously licked his lips. He didn't expect those words to come out of her mouth, but he was more than willing to show her just how much she means to him.
"I love you, Marley Rose. More than I've loved anyone."
Forcing himself against the excruciating pain his body was under, he reached up to stroke her face and finally leaned in to close the distance between them.
He swore he could finally feel again.
Their memories together suddenly flashed in the back of his mind; their first Bad Piggies date, their first dance in Sadie Hawkins, their first kiss after singing A Thousand Years…he won't be stupid anymore to jeopardize all those memories because of dirty lust.
When he felt her reciprocating the kiss, his heart did somersaults in his chest. This was the happiest he had been in ages.
He tried to convey everything that was left unsaid through that kiss. He needed her to know that she was it for him and that he was just fucking stupid, insecure and reckless and that it won't ever happen again.
When they both needed air and broke the kiss, Marley was breathing heavily, still looking at Jake's eyes. "I…I think I believe you when you tell me you love me. It seems like whatever I do, I can't avoid or get away from you. What you did was wrong, Jake, and…you have to accept that I'll constantly be questioning myself if I'm good enough. It'll take a while for me to fully trust you again."
Jake pulled her closer to him. "I know, and I'm going to work my ass off to redeem myself. That was a stupid mistake and I need you to know that I do love you."
Marley pulled back a little from him. "I know I don't put out like her, and I can't make myself do that. For you, or for anyone. You can just leave if that's all you want from me," she said with a sad tone.
"I don't only want you for that, Marley. I want you for you. I'll do anything to get you to trust me again. And this is not just because I'm broken and beat up right now. I was stupid for letting my senses override me. It's still the worst decision I know I've made to this very day. Please believe me, I'm not gonna force you into doing something you don't want, Marley."
After a short silence, Marley finally cracked a small smile. "Maybe you do love me."
Jake felt a sense of relief flood his whole body for the first time in a long time. It was going to take a while to win her trust back, but he wasn't kidding when he said he'd do anything for her. When he leaned in closer to her, Marley placed her hand in his chest.
"It's going to take a while, but I guess I'll be nice enough to let you try," she joked.
Jake smirked. How could they have so easily gone from fighting to joking all at once? "You are nice. And I do love you, not anyone else, so let me try, please."
Marley nodded. "Please don't break my heart again," she whispered, the last bits of hurt carved in her features.
Jake felt sadness once again, knowing that he already broke her heart once when he promised to himself (and to Unique, Ryder and many others) that he wouldn't. But everything was different now. He finally has what he thinks is a chance to make up for all that he's lost, and he wasn't stupid enough to take it for granted.
His mind and heart were now made up.
"Trust me, that's the last thing I'll ever want to do."