Chapter 2
Water… So, so much water… They were drowning me… I was going to die… And then… Just as I was slipping unconscious… they pulled me out… out of the bucket of water… out of my only chance of dieing… my only way out of here.
"The missile's Stark" Raza ordered, "The Jericho missile".
"I'm… I'm w-workin… as f-f-fast as… I can… If y-you ju-"I gasped out, before they pushed my head under again.
I was screaming into the dark blue water, trying to breathe. But I couldn't. I never could. I was even debating whether or not to just let go… to give up breathing… to drown… when the Ten Rings men pulled me up again. Gasping for breath, I shook my head, trying my hardest to get rid of the water. But I couldn't. My chest was burnt, scarred, from water getting into the car battery, literally electrocuting me from the inside out. But I couldn't get rid of the water.
"The missiles Stark" Raza said again, grinning evilly at me, "Until they get built, you're stuck here. You WANT to go home don't you?"
I actually had to think about that. But before I could answer, before I could even get ONE, SINGLE BREATH, i was pushed into the bucket again. I didn't even hold my breath this time. I just relaxed, hoping I would at least black out… But it never came… Instead, I heard the loud shouts of the terriosts.
"He's not breathing". Of course I wasn't breathing. You pushed my head under water, what did you expect?
"Pulse is slowing". Maybe I would black out then.
"Stark… Stark? Breathe you fucking bastard" Raze asked, grabbing a handful of hair and pulling me up. I just spat the water in my mouth at him.
Cursing loudly, he shoved my head under once more, kicking me in the stomach. My shout was muffled by the water… so, so much water… they were going to kill me… I was going to me… I wasn't breathing… At all… Just water… so, so, so much water… swirling around me… as I tried to scream… tried to shout… tried to do anything… but I couldn't… because I was surrounded by water… 30 seconds passed… then a minute… I could hold my breath for two… then 1:30… then 1 minute and 50 seconds… I was blacking out… I was shutting down… I was losing control… I was letting go... I was drowning.
I woke with a start, bolting upright, gasping for breath, only to find that I was in… In the Avengers Tower it think… not in Afghanistan… Not in the cave… Not with the Ten Rings.
"Shhh, you're ok, everything's fine" someone whispered softly, putting their hand across my shoulder and gently pushing me back down into the pillows. What?
"Tony, relax, its ok, it's just me" Clint said quietly. Ok, it was just Clint… Just my brainless feathers… Why was he here again?
"What do you remember?" he asked quietly, his eyes searching my face. Dark bluey-green eyes. What do you remember…? What happened…? Why was he here… Loki.
"Stark? Hey, Tony, you ok?" he asked again, and I slowly nodded, wincing as it sent a stab of pain along my neck. Now that I think about it, everywhere hurts. My legs… my arms… my chest… everything.
"L-Loki" I stammered and Barton nodded slowly, "Bastard beat you up. Badly". Beat me up… That was one word for it…
"W-where… Where a-am i?" I asked, my voice rough and Clint sighed, sitting back in his chair next to the bed, "Currently, you're in… well, a hospital really… Sort of. SHIELD converted one of the bedrooms here in the tower to a hospital room… Much against Fury dislikes".
I smiled slightly, "He v-visited?"
"Oh yea, he came all right" Clint said, slight anger in his voice, "wanted to know why you were unconscious, covered in blood, and barely breathing, and NOT in a hospital".
"W-what chu t-tell him?" I asked and he grinned at that, "told him the same thing you would. To fuck off. It was Loki's fault. And you didn't want complete strangers swarming around the place as doctors".
"You know me t-too well" I replied and he smiled slightly, "Bruce almost turned to the other guy he was so mad. Eyes went completely green. Once the SHIELD doctors took over he practically ran out".
"…Why was he angry?".
Clint looked at me like I was mad, "Why dya think? You were hardly breathing, completely destroyed, and the bastard who did it walked away without a scratch. No one's exactly happy that you're beaten up".
"Bruce got angry because he… was worrying about me?"
"We all got angry cause we worrying about you".
I frowned. That wasn't right. Why were they worrying about me? I wasn't worth the effort. Why did they actually care about me? Loki had said it himself. Weak. Pathetic excuse of an Avenger. Not even worth enough to look at. So why did they seem to… care…?
"You remember everything?" Hawkeye asked quietly and I thought back to… to when? How long had I been here? How long had I been out for?
"Yea" I whispered and Clint nodded thoughtfully, "Then mind explaining why Loki was in your lab at 4am?".
"3am" I corrected.
"What?"
"It was 3am. That's when he decided to pay a visit" I explained.
"We found you at 4… he was hitting you for a full hour?" Clint asked, his hands curling into fists at his side, "Fucking… bastard".
"3am. I was working one minute. The next he was standing in front of me" I continued, "Then he decided to throw me into the wall… Twice… And then at the door. Bloody glass is Hulk-proof even so it didn't smash. And then he…" I trailed off, thinking back to the scepter. The nightmares… the flashbacks… the panic attacks…
"Then he what?" Clint asked and I looked away. Afghanistan… The Ten Rings... My father… Obadiah Stane… The pain… The betrayal. The endless nights I lay awake, too scared to close my eyes in case I saw them…
"Tony. Come on. Tell me" Barton said softly and I closed my eyes, avoiding his intense gaze,
"He… he did the same to me… as he did to you" I whispered, my voice breaking and I could hear the strain on the chair as he gripped onto it.
"He did what?" Barton hissed and I opened my eyed again, looking back to him. He looked like he could murder the next person to walk through that door.
"He fucked up my mind Clint" I replied quietly, "He just… Fucked it up".
"I'll kill him" the archer said firmly, standing up, "I'll fucking kill him".
"That's what he wants Clint. Don't do it" I said as he headed for the door.
His hand froze on the door knob, and slowly he rested his head on the door, "I swore to myself… I promised myself" he whispered, "That I wouldn't let that happen again".
"…If it helps, once I got my thoughts together, I punched him" I said and he smirked, turning slightly to me, "You punched him?".
"Yep. Really hard. In the jaw. And called him a son of a bitch. How do think I broke my wrist?" I replied grinning and he laughed quietly, "I was wondering about that".
"So… no killing mad gods then" I ordered and he sighed, slowly walking back to me and sitting down.
"It was… bad… When he took over my mind" Barton said quietly looking down at his hands, "I vowed that I would never let him touch anyone, ANYONE, ever again".
"It wasn't your fault Clint" I whispered, "He's long gone. I'm still here".
"Well what's left of you" he replied grimly.
"But still a part of me. That's what matters".
"Yea, a part of your body. What about your mind?" he muttered, "It's been a year since the Manhattan attack. I'm still not 100%... over it".
"My mind…" I trailed off and he glanced up at me expectantly.
"My mind can take care of itself".
He gave an abrupt laugh, "That's what I told myself as well".
"Well then you'll know what it's like right now" I whispered and he stared at me, concern and worry spreading across his face, "Empty".
I nodded, "Empty".
"I better tell the others you're all right" Clint announced suddenly, standing up and walking over to the door.
"Don't… Don't tell them…that…" I said, "Not what I told you".
"Tony, they have to know" he said firmly, turning back to me, "And if you weren't going to tell the others, why did you tell me?"
"Because" I whispered, looking down, my voice barely audible and breaking on that single word, "because you know what it's like".
Within the hour, the whole team was in the room, including Thor, who was looking between being ashamed, and… heart-broken. Guess he didn't think Loki was capable of almost killing me. Poor guy still loved his brother. Of course the only doctor in the team had to ruin it by listing out every tiny little thing wrong with me. "Broken wrist, two broken fingers, all on your left hand. Dislocated knee, your right leg. Five broken ribs, seven cracked ribs, both sides. Broken collar bone, your right si-"Bruce continued but I cut him off, "Banner. Cool it". He sighed, rubbing his eyes tiredly before putting down the clip board.
"There, was that so hard?" I asked grinning, "Cause I honestly don't care what's broken or cracked. I can't feel a thing"
"Stark. You've been out for two days. You have so many drugs in your system; you won't feel anything, for a week. And when that week is up, try and tell me you don't care then" he replied, falling down into one of the chairs. Clint had resumed his old chair next to me and every so often, he would shoot me a 'Look'. You know the look that your best friend gives you when you admit a crazy physcopath played with your mind for an hour? Yea, that look. Then there was Natasha, as lovely as ever, who sat, legs crossed, at the end of my bed. Capcicle sat on another chair and Thor hovered uneasily by the door.
"A week?" I asked, "Is that a dare?".
He sighed again, while Clint smirked, and the others rolled their eyes. "No Tony. That is NOT a dare" he replied and I pouted, "But it would have been such a fun dare… Barton?".
"Yea?" Clint asked looking up and I grinned, "Do YOU dare me?".
He smiled slightly, "No Stark, not this time".
"Aw your all so boringgg" I whined, "Honestly, ye guys got to cheer up a bit".
"You almost died Stark. This is no time for cheering" Steve said and I sighed, "Guys, I'm fine. I'm beaten up. But I'm fine".
Clint opened his mouth to object, most likely to mention the fucked up mind part but I pointed my finger at him before he could speak, "Barton, no. NO. Just no".
"No what?" Natasha asked slowly and I glared at Clint, "See what happens when we do this" I said before pointing at the other spy, "You. Do not need to know. AT ALL. None of your concern".
"Sta-"Clint started but I cut him off, "No".
He tried again, "Ton-". "Barton" I warned.
"If you ju-"he attempted and for the third time, I cut him off, "Clint. NO WAY".
"You just go-". "Not listening".
"If you don't te-". "Shhh".
"Stark, I'm war-". "And I'm not listening".
"I SWEAR TO GOD, IF YOU DO-". "Shut. Up".
"GUYS" Steve barked and we both turned to find the rest of them staring at us confused. "What's this about?" he asked, Captain America's voice taking over.
I sighed, shooting a glare at Clint, "Feathers and I had a little… disagreement"- Clint scoffed at that but I ignored him- "It is nothing for ye to worry about".
"So why is Barton so set on telling us?" Natasha asked.
I sighed again, "Because, Legolas over here, thinks it's for the best. I don't. Because ye don't need to know. It's my own little secret. So I'm not going to tell you. And neither is birdbrain".
"You can't stop me Stark" Clint replied and I grinned, "Actually, I can. Besides for the fact that you promised not to breathe a word to ANYONE, and yes that includes Natasha, I'm the only one who can fix you're… Arrow… orders".
"You're bribing me with new arrows?" Barton asked amazed and I smirked, "10, sleeker design, explosive tips".
"100" Barton argued.
"20" I replied.
"90"
"40. Final offer".
"50".
"Deal" I said, shaking his hand and he smirked, "Nice doing business with you".
The others stared at us confused. "Wait, wait, and wait. You" Bruce started, point at me, "Have a deep, dark secret that only Clint knows about. And you" he continued, turning to Barton, "Refuse to tell us, if Tony makes you 50 explosive arrows?" We both nodded and Banner thought for a moment, "My guess is that this… secret… is about Loki".
"It is" Clint confirmed and I turned to him, "We had a deal Barton".
"We did. And we still do" he replied, "But you just don't want them to know the facts. You never said I couldn't tell them who it was about".
"That's plain evil Legolas… I'm proud" I replied grinning, turning back to Bruce, "Yes. It involves the God of Lies".
The doctor stared at me for a moment, seeming to think of something, before standing up, "Everyone, out. He needs to rest".
"Aw, come on Brucey, a little while longer" I pleaded but he shook his head, "Thor, Steve and Natasha out, you, me and Clint, got to have a little talk".
The other three stared at us confused. "A little talk?" Natasha questioned and Bruce seemed to debate for a moment before whispering something to her. She visibly froze up, shaking her head and saying something to Bruce. He replied, still too quiet for us to hear, before she glanced over at Barton and I… and Clint's obvious protective stance over me. "Give me the answer later yea?" she asked, patting Bruce on the back and he nodded before she led the other two confused Avengers out the door. Clint looked at me weirdly, and I was just as confused, as Banner brought a chair over next to me and slowly sat down.
"Doc?" I asked quietly.
He looked up at me, "I know what he did".