THE LONGEST SUNSET
by TJ HECTOR
-Warning: Vulgar words, curse...still a lot of 'em. Hmmmm. And lotsa lotsa rambling. Blame Raphael.
-A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews...InsaneDutchGirl, Guests, Avatar Aang, LiL PriNCeSs Me and Blogger9999999!
I wasn't very confident about the outcome of the story at first, but seems like you guys can handle it. So...more are coming up...
And also thank you very much for favorited/followed the story! That's a big encouragement and I need it badly.
-Disclaimer: I don't own TMNT.
2
How can you tell if a girl loves you or not?
Her eyes, yeah, her eyes.
If she didn't look directly into your eyes when you said, "I'll die for you babe, I'll do anythin'" and tell you the exact same thing, then she had been lying about the whole 'love u' thing.
No wonder he couldn't find a girl. He's so picky. Who the hell would die for him?
Not like him. He could die for anyone.
Well, not exactly. He'd probably die before he knew whom he died for. Ha.
Or maybe he should listen to the Wise One.
"We're too young for relationships. Romantic relation involves devotion and commitment," said the Mighty Fearless. "And those are for the ones who are mature."
"So, what, ya wanna wait till yer fifty to start dating?" he glared at Leo. "Man, my cock will fall off before that 'cause I masturbate too much."
His older brother just rolled his eyes and walked away. And come on Leo's a hypocrite. He loved Karai, the bad girl who was so infamous in their school. Leo. That masochistic pervert.
The supermarket was far behind.
And after running down the block and pummeling a pile of garbage in an alley, Raphael sat on the terrace outside his best friend's apartment. Casey wasn't home.
Strange. Where could that guy be?
He yawned and lay down under the midday sunlight.
It was nice to have some sunlight.
-O-
Yesterday, the last day of the semester, his PE teacher, Mr. Brennan, had talked to him—or trying to talk some sense into him. You're a good athlete and blah, and blah blah. Are you going to college or are you going to find yourself a job? Do you want to be a pro player? Do you want to go back to the football team? 'Cause I can talk to the new coach y'know ("No thanks Mr. Brennan."). You can have good grades if you want, son. You ain't dumb. ("Yeah, I'm aware of that.") You should work harder and…why don't you dream? Young men should dream and think big…
He didn't dream.
Whatcha gonna do when you graduate from the high school, huh?
Who knows? Who cares?
Even if he decided it now, he'd probably change his mind after a week.
So what's the point of asking?
You never get to see the end of that fucking highway. And people call it a highway. Where are ya headin' to? Ya don't even fuckin' know.
So what's the point of that?
He just got bored.
Very bored.
"Casey Fucking Jones where the fuck are ya?" He yelled from the terrace. Some of the kids playing a robber ball down in the alley glanced up.
"Nothin', kiddo, keep playin'," he waved his hand to them.
Keep playing and don't forget to dream. Haha. Sounds so fuckin' grownup.
-O-
"So…your dad's actually a scientist?"
When Raph heard the voice of his friend, he was half-asleep on the terrace.
"Yeah, he's a psychologist," a girl's voice.
"Does it mean that he could have me examined? 'Cause people always tell me I'm crazy."
The girl laughed. "No, you should find yourself a psychiatrist, Casey Jones."
"Well, wanna come up and have a…coke or somethin'? No one else's home."
"No, thanks, Casey. I have to go to my dad's office. He got something planned tonight."
"You and your dad, pretty close huh?"
"Yeah…after my mother died, it's only just the two of us…"
"HEY CASEY!" Raph called from above, "GONNA BRING YER GIRLFRIEND UP HERE?"
"Oh damn," Casey grunted and sighed.
"Who's that?" the girl asked. She was a red-haired teen with a ponytail dangling behind.
"It's the only person I know that's crazier than me," Casey rolled his eyes, "CAN'T YOU SEE I'M BUSY HERE RAPH? GET. LOST!"
"Oh hotshot," Raph shrugged. And ain't that girl April O'Neil, the 'special girl' according to Don? She lived on the block and went to the same school with him. She probably didn't remember him, though. But all the Hamatos knew her very well since Donnie wouldn't stop talking about her twenty-four-seven. Hard to explain. Well, one day Donnie walked down the street and the girl was there, standing at a corner with her dad—and Donatello Hamato fell in love. That was how it all started. In Raph's opinion, that was pretty stupid. And now, dammit, she's with Casey? Wow, poor Donnie, really.
"YER NOT MUCH OF A FRIEND YA KNOW?" Raph shouted down.
Casey showed him the finger.
Raph smirked.
"WAIT A MOMENT WILL YA?" Casey yelled back, and turned to April, "Sorry."
"Is that…your friend? April asked with a frown.
"Yeah…kinda," Casey said.
"Not your…boyfriend?"
"'Course! What were ya thinkin', Red?" Casey burst out a cry. "Geez! I'm going to puke."
"Just kidding," April smiled, "It's just that you seem very close. I saw you two in school all the time."
"Well uh, probably. He's an unwelcome guest though."
"I CAN HEAR YOU UP HERE," Raph yelled. "YOU'LL BE DEAD BEFORE YA KNOW IT."
"Man," Casey sighed, "I'm so sorry he interrupts our date—"
"Who said this is a date?" April frowned again.
"Um, nobody?" Casey grinned.
"Well, gotta go," the girl shrugged with a small smile, "I'll see you later, Jones."
-O-
"Ya like her," Raph said. He was lying on his friend's bed, while the owner of the bed pacing in the room restlessly.
"Yeah!" Casey exclaimed, "But I don't know what she thinks o' me."
"She thinks yer an ape with slightly retarded brain function. 'Cause ya know, that's a normal reaction."
"No, she thinks I'm the hockey team leader-to-be," Casey said, "And a pro player-to-be. And a tall, dark and handsome guy."
"Gee, dark? Yer fuckin' pale," Raph snorted. "I'm dark."
"Ya just havta disagree on everythin' I said huh, Hamato," Casey stopped pacing.
"Hey, don't be so sensitive," Raph sat up.
"You don't like her?"
"Ah, that's whatcha worried about? She's not my type."
"What's your type?"
"Dunno," Raph shrugged, "She seems decent."
"What does that mean? Ain't it good?"
"It's good, I'm not sayin' it's not good, Case," Raph said, "I was just sayin' she ain't my type."
"Yer gay? 'Cause if you are, I'm goin' ta ask you to leave that bed right now."
"Oh fuck no," Raph retorted. "I'm the least gay guy on the entire planet."
"Damn, she asked if yer my boyfriend. How come she'd think I'm gay? Maybe—"
"Leave it alone," Raph grinned. "Girls asked all kinds o' weird stuff. Their brains don't function like us do."
"They function better," Casey muttered.
"I wonder," Raph laughed.
-:-:-:-:-:-
"You are late, my son," Yoshi shot him a glance when he entered the dojo that evening.
Oh why does he care—
"Leonardo," Yoshi said, holding his staff and thinking for a moment, "You pair with Raphael. No weapons."
Raph turned and saw Mikey and Donnie were already sparring in the corner.
Ooookay, he thought.
Leonardo tilted his head, his dark eyes suggesting something Raph didn't bother to care.
-O-
"Nice one, Raph," Leo smirked.
He felt himself pinned helplessly under his big brother. Damn Leo's fucking arms. The grip on both his wrists were like iron cuffs.
He struggled, trying to shrug off the weight of his brother with a kick, but Leo pressed down hard with his left knee. Raph let out a grunt for both pain and anger.
Leo's taller, sure, but he ain't heavier.
He fought again, this time Leo actually backed off a little. But before he could get on his feet, Leonardo grabbed his right wrist and twisted it—a close quarters technique taught by Splinter when they were younger. Raph hissed in pain and was pinned down again.
"Yame!" Yoshi's voice sounded nearby.
The pressure on him vanished, and he felt hot rage burning his face.
He sprang toward Leo, and knocked the dark hair boy down with a desperate, anger-fueled cry.
"Raphael!" Splinter's call was furious.
"What the hell, Raph?" Leo yelled, shoving him aside. "Sensei said yame!"
"I don't care," Raph roared, "You ain't see the last o' me!"
"It's only a practice Raph!" Leo clutched his collar and shouted at his face.
A strong hand started to pull him away from his eldest brother—Raphael turned and saw Splinter's stern face.
"Twenty flips, Raphael," Yoshi said grimly. "When I say yame, there shall be no movement."
"H-hai, Sensei," Raph grunted through his teeth, and starting to walk toward one corner of the dojo for his twenty goddamn flips.
-:-:-:-:-:-
He didn't know why people have the yearning to fight.
Call it aggression.
Donnie didn't possess aggression, Mikey neither. Donnie didn't enjoy martial arts training, actually; he just thought it was something they had do when they were younger and were forced to practice while other kids were out riding bikes or playing soccer. Now he still trained with them when he had free time, but mostly it was on the purpose of staying fit and healthy. Mikey liked to spar, because he thought it was fun. The two of them didn't have the aggression.
Leo was a different case.
Raphael never understood why Leo liked martial arts. Leo was pretty drawn to quiet, boring activities like reading, brooding, and meditating. Maybe the guy just liked to train relentlessly because it requires a lot of mental discipline. And the stoic seventeen-year-old loved discipline. Hell, Leo was a crazy controlling maniac. Perfectionist. Leo wasn't really aggressive.
Or was he?
Raphael lay on his bed facing the ceiling. It was a shame, letting Leo rub it in on his face like that. Leo couldn't possibly be that good.
He couldn't.
Raph fumbled with his earphone wires. The music playing on his phone (Splinter got them each a phone months ago—not some fancy phones designed by some fruit company, though) was a loud one, a Japanese song. He didn't understand one word the guy was shouting—he only understood some simple conversation in Japanese—but he liked it.
And Raph liked fighting. He fought for fight's sake.
And he was pretty aggressive.
He liked physical contact. Tackle. Collide. Punch. Kick. Wrestle.
He liked physical contact, especially aggressive ones.
Non-aggressive ones?
He shuddered at the thought.
Maybe if he weren't so picky about girls, he would know the feels of them. Ha. Okay. That's off the topic. Now he's just being horny.
-O-
"Raph?" Leo's voice from the doorway.
"Yeah," he took off the headphone.
"You can use the shower now," the elder boy said, walking into the room in only his shorts.
"Oh," Raph only mumbled in response. He stared at Leo. The guy hadn't become more muscular these days. Leo was still a li'l bit more than just fit, fine. But Raph was sure he was bigger.
So how come Leo won the fucking spar?
Raph got out of his bed and grabbed his own towel.
-:-:-:-:-:-
He went into the bedroom. In the still half-steamy mirror he saw himself. He always checked his muscle before he showered. He was a lot thinner after he quit the football team last year. Months after he got shot, he started to take boxing lesson and do a lot of weight training, hoping he could get himself in shape again. He was very proud of his build—probably the only thing he thought was worth check out on his whole person. He didn't like his face much. He wished it could be more masculine. He always cursed his biological father when it came to his features. That bastard probably was some weird coward with a fucking baby face. Okay, it ain't that bad. But goddammit he hated his eyes. They were just so…fucking weird. The color's weird. How come he didn't get brown eyes just like Donnie? The shape was weird. Everything was wrong.
He sighed and got into the tub.
-O-
No girls would ever like him.
Okay, he could attract them with his build. He had succeeded several times before. But he couldn't lie about his temper. When there was an outburst they almost always turned away from him. And man, he would lie about it but dammit he hated how those stupid girls react to his fucking temper. He hated it when he yelled something at their face and they just started crying or whining something like, oh Raph, how can you say that? I thought you care… or gee Raph, I don't know anymore, maybe I'll need sometime to think about this. Just fuck off, bitch. Hey, he ain't some fuck overloaded with machismo—well, at first glance maybe, but he ain't one hundred percent like that. He didn't want to hurt their feelings, either, but they just so easily got hurt and that's what's driving him crazy. And he just couldn't stand their giggles and their huddling together with other girl friends laughing about some poor guy's poor performance on a kiss or during a make out.
-O-
Someone knocked on the bathroom door.
"Hey Raph, can I come in? I need to brush my teeth."
"What? Can't ya even wait five minutes Mikey?" he yelled.
"Dad said I must go to bed now. He caught me playin' Gamedude last night."
"Man, are you twelve? Get in. Brush yer goddam teeth. And get lost."
He heard the sound of the door opening and closing through the shower curtain.
"What the fuck were you playin' on that antique last night?" Raph asked.
"Super Mario 2."
"Geez, why would ya suddenly wanna play ol' Gamedude?"
"Nostalgia, maybe," Mikey laughed.
"Nostalgia, huh. Some SAT words."
"Ya should never underestimate me, Raphie," Mikey started to brush his teeth. "So, uh, why did ya leave us in the supermarket?"
"Why don't you just brush yer fuckin' teeth," Raph said hoarsely, irritation flaring up.
Mikey went quiet. And after some moments, he said softly, "Was just worryin', Raph."
Oh fuck.
"Gimme my fuckin' towel," Raph said, shutting off the water.
Mikey passed the towel in from the other side of the curtain.
"Man," Raph said, wrapping the towel around his waist and stepped out of the tub. "I—"
Mikey shrugged. "Yeah, whatever. Ya don't have to answer my question if you don't wanna."
"Mikey, I'm crazy."
"You always tell us we're crazy. It's never you. It's always us who don't understand." Mikey snorted. Did Mikey just say that?
"Hey, what's that for?" Raph tried to say something, but clearly he had pissed Mikey off. Man. He just pissed Mikey off.
"Donnie had to carry all the stuff home. We had to walk five blocks. But ya know what? It's not the worst thing."
Raph was silent for a second or two, and then he asked, "What is it then?"
"The worst thing is ya just went away. Disappeared."
"I ain't going nowhere. I came to the dojo later, didn't I?"
"Yeah, but why did you just leave suddenly without explainin' somethin' to us?"
"Why should I?"
"Raph," Mikey turned toward him, his mouth full of the foam of toothpaste, but he looked very serious, "Did it ever—ever occur to you that we could be worried? That…that we may wonder what's wrong with you, or us?"
"Yeah, sometimes."
Mikey opened his mouth, and then closed it, turning back toward the mirror and spitting the foams into the basin.
"What the hell are ya tryin' to say, Mikey?"
Mikey gargled and spat.
"Never mind," the blond boy said, wiping his mouth with the shirtsleeve of his old orange T-shirt—his favorite pajama. And suddenly it came to Raph that Mikey had changed…grown up, somehow. His flaxen hair hung around his face still made him look extra young and babyish, but the blue eyes insinuated otherwise.
"Hey," Raph grabbed his shoulder before Mikey could turn the doorknob.
Mikey glanced at him briefly.
"I know, alright?" Raph said gruffly, "I know…I just…dammit. I'm…I don't know," he shook his head reluctantly. "Oh fuck."
"Well," Mikey curled his lips faintly and deliberately, and the sight sent a painful sting deep into Raph's throat. "G'night, Raph."
And Mikey was gone.
—End of chapter two.
-A/N: I hope you know that I have nothing against gay lol. It's just that two straight guys are afraid of what girls might think of them. And Gamedude stands for a old game device we played when we were kids. Of Nin****o company. They used this word in 2k3 series and I thought it was funny so I borrowed it.
And things seem a little slow-paced. I'm doing that deliberately. Hope you're fine with it 'cause it will be like this in this story.
I'll try to update again within this week, because on this weekend I'm leaving with my school kendo team for a competition in another town. I won't bring my laptop with me because if I bring it, I'll TYPE FAN FICTION and stay up late and lose my match and be killed by my teacher lol.
Okay enough boring stupid daily life. Hopefully I'll see you very soon!
P.s. I'm thinking about introducing another familiar face from 2k3 to my story, who's yet new to all my fics so far! I'm lookin' forward to that. (Hint: a girl)