AN: R&R please!

I curl up in my nest, yawning. I'm anxious to fall asleep. It's been a long day and I'm exhausted. Also, Nightwing said she is going to train me tonight, so I'll need all the sleep I can get before she wakes me up. After a few minutes of tossing and turning, which kind of makes me glad I had my own nest, I fall asleep.

…..

I open my eyes and stretch. I realize something; Nightwing never trained me last night. I turn around to look for her, and I realize something else: I'm not in control of my body. I start to panic as I walk towards the Highrock. "Help me!" I want to shout, but I can't. I calm down and tell myself, It's a dream, Shadeflower. Just a dream. It has to be. Nightwing wouldn't lie to you. Would she?

I leap onto the Highrock and yowl. "Attention ShadowClan! I am your new leader!"

Hollyfrost pads forward. "I don't want you to be my leader."

Murmurs of agreement come from the crowd. Wildstorm steps forward as well and nods at Hollyfrost. My eyes narrow.

"Have it your way," I hiss. I tense my leg muscles and leap off the Highrock, a gray blur. I streak past the two protesters, slashing their throats as I pass by. Blood gurgles from their necks, staining the ground crimson. The rest of the Clan slowly inches away from the bodies with disbelief. I jump back on the Highrock, filled with horror at what I had done. Who had I become?

"Anyone else?" I hear myself snarl, and then everything goes black. It's over. Oh, thank StarClan! It's finally over! But I am left filled with doubt, nagging, terrible doubt. Would I ever kill my Clanmates? And not even feel anything? Maybe that's my problem. Maybe I need to stop feeling.

…..

I open my eyes again, hoping to see the ShadowClan camp. My heart sinks when I find myself in a place I don't recognize. The ground is marshy and I wrinkle my nose at the smell. The trees somehow look scary and depressing at the same time, and cast shadows everywhere. Something about this forest doesn't seem right, and it puts me on edge.

Suddenly Nightwing pops out from behind a tree. "You finally came," she meowed coolly. "I was beginning to get worried."

"What is this place?" I ask.

"The Dark Forest," my sister replies. Noticing the confused look on my face, she continues. "It's where evil cats go when they die. And no, you aren't dead."

I let out a sigh of relief. "So this is where we'll be training?"

Nightwing nods. "Let's begin."

She leaps at me. Unprepared, I topple to the ground and am immediately pinned. I struggle to throw her off of me, but she won't budge. She begins to slash at my stomach. I cry out in pain.

"Come on!" Nightwing hisses. "If you give up that easily, you'll be no use to anyone! Let your anger, your hatred fuel you!"

I remember my mother leaving, my Clanmates despising me, and all of my failures. The anger builds inside of me and eventually I am not Shadeflower, I am merely a channel for the roaring, raging flood of hatred.

I look up at Nightwing. She ignored you. She betrayed you, I think. Suddenly she is off of me, thrown to the other side of the clearing and I am the one on top, the one mercilessly slashing.

"Stop," she whispers, her voice hoarse. "Stop!" my sister shouts, and I finally come out of my trance. I stare at my paws. They are covered in blood. My sister's blood.

"Oh my StarClan," I manage. I almost vomit. Why does the forest look like it's spinning? I collapse onto my side.

"I'm so sorry," I meow quietly.

"Sorry? Why?" Nightwing blinks at me. "That was great. I never knew you could fight that well. Fox dung, I have to go on the dawn patrol. Bye."

With that, she disappears. I begin to lick my paws clean. The taste of the blood sickens me. How could she say that was good? I wonder. Well, I guess it is. It will help me execute the plan. It will help me be loved.

…..

A week after I started training, I have to go on the dawn patrol. That normally wouldn't bother me, but I have to go with the most annoying and full-of-himself cat ever: Sootstripe.

…..

We leave camp, and as soon as we do, he starts bossing everyone around.

"Wildstorm and Cloverstripe, go patrol the RiverClan border. I guess I'll have to take Shadeflower to patrol the ThunderClan border. Maybe she should just stay here, she'd just get in the way," he snarls.

Wildstorm just nods and leaves with Cloverstripe. Sootstripe and I keep walking.

A short while later, when we are a few fox-lengths away from the border, Sootstripe shoves me to the ground. "Oops," he smirks.

My vision goes red as fury surges through me. I leap at him and pin him to the ground. I slash him for a few heartbeats before he manages to get a blow in. When he does, I fall back, dizzy.

"Sorry," I whisper, breathing heavily. "I don't know what came over me…"

"I think we should just go back to camp," Sootstripe wheezes, shocked.

"That sounds like a good idea."

…..

I stand in the shadowy forest once more.

"Today we're going to practice tracking," Nightwing announces. "What's the best way to hide your scent?"

"Water?" I guess.

"Mud, actually," she meows. "Water hides your scent, but mud also disguises your coloration. Cover yourself in mud."

I roll on the ground and coat my fur in muck.

"Now I'm going to go hide in the forest. Your job is to track me through the forest without me noticing," she explains. "Alright?"

I nod and she walks off into the forest. I quietly pad after her.

I follow her all the way to a sluggish, muddy river and jump out from behind her. She seems genuinely surprised.

"Good job," Nightwing meowed grudgingly.

"Thanks," I purred. That, for her, was like cheering and purring for anyone else.

…..

Nightwing picked at the ground nervously with her claws. "I think you're ready."