Chapter Two

Somehow I actually managed to get to sleep, despite the fact that it was raining. I guessed it was because of the fact that it wasn't a downpour. I knew that would have been a nightmare to even attempt sleeping. So with nature on my side for once, I woke up without yawning. It used to be a feat to actually wake without yawning when I was younger and stayed up here during the summer.

Today was January 19th, my first day at Forks High. I didn't know if I should go ahead and flip the blankets over me again so that I could go asleep or try to actually be as positive as I could be.

Again, being overall positive was not a forte of mine.

I woke up, put on my fuzzy white house robe and went into the bathroom that Charlie and I shared. I flinched at the sight of my messy dark hair, the lines that were etched underneath my eyes from the countless times that my medication would cause insomnia (a lot more than they should!), and my scar that was on my face.

Brushing out my hair, I began to wash my face while subconsciously making sure that I would dab my scar instead of full on scrubbing. The last time I had done that without being fully awake made my scar throb, along with making it more pronounced so it was red and irritated.

I put on some concealer so my scar wasn't that noticeable (or at least I tried, I was certain that it was still pink enough the concealer wouldn't be able to actually do its job).

Heading down the stairs, I heard the sound of Charlie grumbling in the kitchen, while I rolled my eyes. I passed by the mantel that had all of my school photos throughout the years in their frames, a black and white picture of Charlie and Renee at their wedding, and finally the clearer definition than I wanted it to be: the after delivery picture of my birth where Renee was holding me in her arms and Charlie had a proud look on his face while I had the scrunched up baby face.

Entering the small kitchen, I found Charlie looking helplessly through the bright yellow cabinets. "Where is it? I swore I bought it!"

I frowned and sat down in one of the three kitchen chairs, which didn't match, and rested my arm against the square oak table. The dark paneled walls only made the yellow cabinets brighter despite the fact that they desperately needed a paint job. The white linoleum floor needed to be mopped again.

"Good morning, Dad."

Charlie jumped in surprise, hit his head on the cabinet door, and then turned around so that he could see me. He was already wearing his uniform, but his gun belt was sitting in the living room near the front door. As far as I knew he never used his gun, but I didn't know if he actually did and he didn't tell me or Renee.

"Good morning, Bells. Sorry about that, I was looking for your favorite cereal. I know that I'm not…used to this new living situation…but…" Charlie blushed as he looked flustered and I gave him a small smile before I stood up and went over to the cabinet to look inside it.

"It's okay, Dad. I'm not that crazy about cereal to begin with. I'll just have a granola bar," I assured him, before I reached in and grabbed a granola bar. Charlie nodded his head before he shut the cabinet behind him.

He shifted his feet and looked uncomfortable at the knowledge that he didn't know what else to do. I grabbed a glass of milk before sitting down at the little square oak kitchen table, noting that Charlie kept looking out the window.

If things were different I would be alone right now, Charlie would already be at the police station. Only, things weren't different. I didn't have a driver's license, but I did have a permit. I didn't drive, that was one of the things that I absolutely could not do. The trauma and disorder made it impossible for me to drive without feeling anxious enough to pull over to the side and need to do breathing exercises.

So the only option I had was for Charlie to drive me to school, which both helped my anxiety but also ruined my image.

Did I even have an image?

That wasn't the point, for a seventeen-year-old girl to have her father drive her to school in his police cruiser probably wasn't the best way to make first impressions to the student body.

My hunger soon dissipated with those thoughts, so I finished off my granola bar and chugged my milk down. Rushing upstairs, I slipped on a light weight blue v-neck long sleeve sweater that I had found at a thrift shop in Phoenix, some jeans that I had bought a couple months back, and some brown moccasins. I brushed my teeth, checking and making sure that I didn't have any remnants of the granola bar.

Grabbing my same leather purse I had worn yesterday, my signature Parka, and my purple backpack that Charlie had bought me when he learnt that I would be moving up here, I hurried down the stairs and was about to touch the wooden flooring but slipped and grabbed onto the banister at the last moment.

Charlie quietly chuckled, before I shot him an irritated glare. I managed to upright myself before I headed out of the house and he followed behind me. I hopped into the passenger seat and allowed my things to fall into the floorboard in front of me. Charlie was locking the front door and soon came down so that he could get into the driver's side of the cruiser; once he did he pulled out of the gravel driveway and began to head in the direction of the high school.

I peered out at the scenery that was around me, finding the same thing as I did when we entered this dreary town: green. It was slowly starting to get on my nerves, seeing these green coated trees was not going to be the highlight of my drive to and from school. I was certain of that.

"Ah, um, Bells?" I turned my head towards Charlie, to notice that he was looking as though he was battling with saying something but it must have been something in my eyes or just my face that made him decide to say something.

"I am new at this parenting business, as we both can see that, but if anyone at school bothers you let me know. You shouldn't feel degraded for how you look," Charlie managed to say, allowing me to know how much I meant to him once again.

Of course I couldn't help but reach my hand up to touch that side of my face, only to pause and let my hand fall back down.

Insecurity latched itself down onto me once again, as though a rattlesnake decided to sink its venom into my veins. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths, trying to remind myself that this was going to be all right.

My hands began to quiver, and my eyes began to water at the remembrance of the other children crying when I would go to preschool. The kids that were saying that I was the bride of Frankenstein; they were the ones that had this part of me submerged deep within me.

I hadn't even known that I was sobbing until I felt the car lurch forward, and I opened my eyes to see that an old model car had managed to fender bend us. Charlie was soon getting out, before the driver of the car could actually be contemplating the thought of having a hit and run from the actual Police Chief.

Suddenly I didn't want to go to school; at first I was juggling what it to feel about it, but Charlie reminding me that kids could be cruel no matter the age had struck me hard. Getting fender bended while in his cruiser didn't help either when it came to the emotions department.

I slumped down in my seat, happy that I couldn't look to the side because I was certain that there were some of the town's residents next to me on the other side of the cruiser door. The last thing I needed was to have to roll my window down and listen to them ask me if I should go to the hospital. If they were decent and kind people they wouldn't ask questions about my face.

Eventually Charlie managed to work things out with the driver. He started to head in my direction again before a woman came up to Charlie, she was telling him something before she pointed at me. He listened with patience before he nodded his head, pat her on the shoulder, and then got into the cruiser.

"Why was she pointing at me?" I mumbled, causing Charlie to sigh and look at me, "I'm taking you to the clinic. We need to make sure that your medications have been transferred from Phoenix to here too. I'm certain that you're going to like the doctor, he's a wonderful man. His name is Dr. Cullen."

Dr. Cullen? So that was his name? Pride radiated from Charlie when it came to him talking about Dr. Cullen. I turned to him, "Tell me about him…please."

Charlie nodded, "Dr. Cullen, has been working here for the past two years, he moved down here from Alaska. He's really young, in his early thirties. When he first came here women were flocking to the clinic to get him to check on broken limbs or the common flu so that they could get time with him, but Dr. Cullen is married."

"So he's good looking…" I noted, earning a slight smile from Charlie at the sight of me taking in all that he was saying with interest.

"Mrs. Cullen is very beautiful, and Mr. Cullen is extremely handsome to the female population of Forks. She works at home, she's an interior designer," Charlie supplied to me before he continued; "they have five kids that they've adopted, though they aren't kids by any means, they're juniors and seniors at your school. I can't remember all their names, but they aren't related to each other. Except for two, the twins that are Mrs. Cullen's niece and nephew, but I can't remember their names either."

I absorbed what he had told me, and didn't say anything else. I had always had a love and hate relationship with doctors. Some of them believed me when I told them that I had Panic Disorder, others didn't. Some tried their hardest to make sure that I wouldn't worry with the disorder, while others just handed me medications and told me to call if anything happened.

Biting the corner of my lip, I turned to look at Charlie. He was peering straight ahead, making sure that he would pay attention to the road. He glanced at the review mirrors and then paused when he saw that I was looking at him. He frowned, "what's wrong, Bells? Did that fender bender shake you up more than you're letting me know?"

Charlie wasn't the most observant man in the world, but when it came to me I could honestly say that he was. I meant the world to him. Renee meant the world to him. Renee walked out on him, but I didn't shun him out of my life or tell him that I never wished that he was my father.

"I—is h-he a g-good doctor?" I managed to stutter out, hating the rare moments that I stuttered. Frustration was building up within me, at the fact that I was already having a crying session this morning and now I was stuttering. I wasn't having a good day at all…I thought that at least it would be tolerable but now….

"Without a doubt, don't worry, Bella. You're in safe hands with Dr. Cullen. He's the best doctor this town has ever had," Charlie reassured me as we reached the road where the clinic was on.

My heart rattled in my chest as Charlie pulled up to the front of the clinic, parking in the spot that was directly looking into it. I gulped and allowed my fingers to intertwine together before I wondered if I should even go and see him. Meeting new doctors always made me beyond terrified, I never knew how they would feel about my condition and if they were going to take me seriously.

As though he could sense it, I saw the front door open and a handsome man come out to welcome Charlie and me to the clinic. My eyes widened as I saw a tall man with ice hued skin, so clear and pale, and eyes that were the warmest golden I had ever seen. His hair was slicked back but it was nicely layered and was the same hue as his eyes. His features were perfect, and he was toned.

Charlie turned to me, "I take that you think he's handsome. Wipe your mouth though, sweetheart, you're drooling." I shot him an annoyed look as I wiped away the drool that actually existed, blushing some at the knowledge that I was speechless at the sight of this beautiful man that was going to be my doctor.

Charlie got out of the cruiser and reached forward to shake hands with Dr. Cullen. He was telling him something, and Dr. Cullen listened intently to what he was saying before he nodded his head. Charlie turned to look at me and waved his hand, as though to motion me to come out of the cruiser.

I took a deep breath before I unbuckled my seatbelt and got out of the cruiser. I paid attention to getting out, knowing that the last thing that I needed was to trip going up the curb so that he could catch me. I was already a mess; I didn't need to have Dr. Cullen make a cot for me to come to whenever I tripped (even if he was the most beautiful man I had seen).

I kept my head down and went up to Dr. Cullen. "Hello, Dr. Cullen…" I mumbled, earning a small laugh from Dr. Cullen, one that was light and airy before he spoke, "Hello, Bella, you can call me Carlisle if you wish."

It didn't surprise me what his name was, he looked just like his name. I did look up though and allowed him to look at me, to see the scar that was etched down the right side of my face and the misty blind eye.

"Come, let's go inside, it's impolite to be standing out here in the cold," Carlisle spoke as he ushered us into the clinic. I entered with Charlie in front of me and Carlisle behind me. He didn't look at me in disgust; he looked at me as though there was nothing wrong with me.

Carlisle waved at the nurses at the station, where a few of them were sighing while one of the middle aged women smacked them with her patient files. She arched her eyebrow at them and they pouted before they got back to work.

Carlisle led us into his private office so that we could just be the ones he was focused on. He shut the door behind him and walked around the desk so that he could sit down and look at us. The office didn't have anything special to it; it looked like any other clinical office for a doctor. We were welcomed with the white theme and sterile shimmers that were on the office desk and the linoleum floor.

"I would like to thank you, Charlie, for sending me her medical records. I won't have to contact her hospitals down in Phoenix unless I need to. I see that you were in a car wreck with your mother when you were three, Bella. You ended up becoming blind in your right eye, heavily scarred, and diagnosed with Panic Disorder," Carlisle softly spoke, as though he was making sure that I wouldn't feel degraded or that I should feel frightened by him.

I was actually surprised that Charlie had told him that he could call me Bella; Charlie must have made sure that I would feel as comfortable as possible when I would come here to Forks. I wouldn't be called Isabella; I didn't have to feel as though I had to correct everyone.

Carlisle glanced over the records that he had gotten before he looked up again and turned to me, "I'm going to run a normal checkup on you, and then we're going to discuss your medications. I hope that is all right with you, of course."

I nodded my head, "I'm fine with it. I'm used to it."

For a split second I swore I saw sadness dug deep within those honey hued irises, but it could have just been the lighting in the office. It was gone the next second, and he got up before he ushered us out of his office and to a hospital cot in a room that was a few doors down from his office.

Charlie stayed in the hallway, but the door was cracked in case I decided that I needed him in the room with me. As Carlisle checked my heart, I knew that it was beating a little more with his presence than normal. He merely mentally noted the beat, and then went on to check my eyes.

"Phoenix is a lot different than Forks, I'm certain that this will be a big change for you. I've moved a lot in my life, I'm certain that your father told you that my family and I moved from Alaska two years ago?" Carlisle stopped shining the light in my eye, to track my pupil dilation.

"Yes, he did. And yeah, Phoenix is a lot different than Forks. I like hot weather, nothing cold and damp," I admitted as my eyes couldn't stop looking at Carlisle. There was something hypnotic in his eyes; they just held so much warmth to them that I never been greeted with. It might also have to do with his eyes.

Carlisle changed to checking my reflexes, barely tapping against my knees with his medical instrument. They jumped up without meaning to and Carlisle nodded his head before he pulled over his rolling stool to sit down on.

"Some pharmaceutical companies send out medical cards so that you can write down your different medications and the dosages that you have to take. Did you ever get one, if not, do you want one? I've had patients in the past that say that the medical cards help a lot for organization and memory," Carlisle clasped his hands together before putting them in his lap.

"I have one," I admitted as I picked up my purse and dug through my wallet before I fished it out. I handed it to him and he nodded his head, before he looked back up at me, "do you have enough for now? Or do you need some refilled?"

Charlie decided to come in this moment, and he sat down in one of the spare chairs that were in the room for parents and other third parties. He began to tell him the insurance that the police force was on, and Carlisle listened to him before writing down things. Looking back up, Carlisle turned to look at me, "do you need a school excuse? I can write one up for you."

Carlisle was already heading over to the little countertop of the medical cabinet off to the side so that he could get a piece of paper to write the excuse. "That would be nice, Carlisle. I'm going to take Bella back to the house and head off to work. I think that this all that she can handle for today."

Carlisle finished writing the excuse and handed it to Charlie, but Charlie ended up coming up to me and handing it to me. I put it in my purse before hopping up from the cot. I let my eyes wander over Carlisle once again, "thanks, Carlisle…and for looking at me…and not seeing my disorder more or my scars."

Carlisle gave me the warmest smile so far and I almost blinked in shock at the sweetness that dripped from him. "Of course, Bella, you can always come to me if you have any problems."

Carlisle went out of the examination room and I drifted off after him, Charlie was standing next to him. Charlie was telling him about the different cops that were at the police station and how they were doing.

We had entered the lobby of the clinic only for a beautiful woman to enter through the front doors with the same golden eyes as Carlisle. She had soft motherly features, with curly brown hair that fell at her shoulders. She was wearing a stylish ivory sweater, some nice navy blue dress pants, and silver high heels.

She had a lunch bag in her right hand and a beautiful black Coach purse was hooked on her shoulder. "Good morning, girls! Good morning, honey!" the woman spoke, her voice soft as angels choiring, while Carlisle spoke as though he was one of those sultry voice actors.

The woman went up and kissed Carlisle on the cheek before she turned to look at me and Charlie, "you must be Bella, I'm Esme Cullen. You can call me Esme. We're really happy that you're here."

Again, another beautiful creature stood in front of me and the last thing that seemed to be on her mind was to stare directly at my scar on my face. Charlie spoke, "Sorry about that, Esme. Bella's had a rough morning, some idiot decided to fender bend me. She was supposed to go to school today but…."

"Of course, I understand. I just came by to stop and give Carlisle his lunch. I take it that you're going to the station now? I can drive Bella home if you want…unless that would be too much for today…" Esme turned to look at me, patience blossoming out of her as she waited for my answer.

"M-maybe n-next t-time," I managed to stutter out, which only made Esme nod her head without any emotion that revealed that she was extremely upset with what my decision was. She seemed a little disappointed but the fact that I had allowed her to know that there could be a next time she was a little more appeased.

"I'll call you when I get home from work today, and we can work that out," Charlie replied before he put his hand on the back of my shoulders. "That is if you're okay with that, Bella."

I let my gaze settle on my dad, knowing that Charlie could only do so much when it came to taking me to and from school. He could have days where he would have to work later or earlier and had no chance to take me to school. He could have days where he got sick and I would have to stay home.

I then let my eyes wander to the Cullens, seeing that there was so much warmth and acceptance in their eyes already. It was so surprising to see that much acceptance towards me, I hadn't ever met a pair of people so eager to help out. I had yet to have someone jump in and say that they could drive me home, but Esme Cullen happened to be the first person who had.

"I'm okay with that."

I was okay with that.

twilight does not belong to me