"And Then There Were Less"
by JVM-SP150
"Really? Token wants to atone, huh? 'bout time after what that bastard pulled at our wedding!" Tamara Michelle Warner-McCormick was an attractive woman of roughly thirty years, with sandy brown hair, currently in a red short-sleeved top and jean shorts. Her brown eyes cynically stared toward her husband of seven years as he sat across from her at the kitchen table, a small letter sitting quietly in the middle. She didn't like it. She didn't like him. She barely knew Token and her one experience with him was nothing short of disaster.
"Relax Tam-Tam, I think it would be a fun little getaway. I mean, maybe Token's really changed. He was a great bud as a kid." replied Kenneth James McCormick, better known by the moniker of Kenny, an adult man who wore an orange hoodie in an almost childish fashion, with messy blonde hair and blue eyes that could strike into the heart of truly any woman. He still had the same demeanor as well - he was an optimist, a big believer in the good that lies inside everyone - sometimes still, his wife thought he put too much emphasis on the good inside people.
"I really don't know, Ken, I mean after what he did on our wedding night..." Tammy turned away slightly, crossing her arms, "He almost got us arrested over nothing!" She refused to put her trust in someone she barely knew.
"We were not arrested, dear, as a detective, I know a few things about this protocol. He filed a report." Kenny clarified as if scolding a young child who didn't know what she was talking about.
Tammy turned away, crossing her arms, "Ken, I'm just not sure about this. It doesn't seem like such a good idea. I mean, an isolated mansion in California?" Kenny placed a hand on her back, and her eyes fixated on her husband again.
"Babe, come on..."
"No Ken. I really don't think it's a good idea. It's too... too... I don't know... I mean... what about Jake and Rachel?" she motioned towards the children. They were not in the kitchen, but were visible across the hallway in the play room. Jake was only eight, playing with a green toy dinosaur. He had inherited his father's fashion sense and wore a blue parka. One could hear muffled roars from his mouth - he had a strong sense of imagination. His older sister, Rachel, was nearing her eleventh birthday, wearing a green T-shirt, with long hair like her mother's, but the blonde color of her father. She was reading in the corner, quietly by herself, but keeping a responsible eye on her brother.
"Maybe we just shouldn't bring the kids, honey. We can find someone to watch them." Kenny advised, worried for the sake of their children as well. It didn't seem safe - he felt there was no danger for himself or his wife, but somehow he felt it was better to leave the children.
"Awh Ken, you sure we should go?" Tammy said, eyes more open to the idea of going now. Kenny figured it was her maternal instincts again. Despite the family's low budget, she had been a great mother as far as Kenny cared, not to mention a fine wife.
"Tell you what, babe." he smiled, "Stan called and wanted to meet up with me and some of the guys at Tweek Bros. Coffee. I'll talk to them and see if anyone else is going. There's safety in numbers, sweetie - if a bunch of us go, I'm sure Token won't pull any shit." Kenny gave his wife a reassuring smile, and as soon as their eyes met, she could not help but smile back, and suddenly the decision was made.
xXx
Gwendolyn 'Wendy' Marie Testaburger-Marsh left South Park City Hall, shrugging as she brought her coat on over her shoulders - the new Administration had been secretive, aides guarding every door. Such intimidation was not intended, but the new Mayor had political enemies and insisted on only the best protection possible. Few were permitted within those guarded walls, and Wendy was one of few. Wendy nodded at both guards as she left the building. She was twenty-nine, with silky black hair well past her shoulders and soft, subtle facial features, her earthly brown eyes now at peace.
She was soon joined by a shorter girl with brown hair, wearing a green shirt with a purple skirt, who looked a bit dusty. "Evening Wendy." she smiled.
"Hello Karen." Wendy greeted with a smile, "How's it being secretary to the Mayor?" The two had become friends over the years, her and the youngest McCormick. She'd helped Karen acquire her job in City Hall - it took quite some leverage, but Karen was now the Mayor's secretary, which was a much more comfortable position than one could guess.
"It's not a bad job at all! Going home, eh?" Karen liked Wendy - she had become somewhat of a big sister to her over time.
"Well I would stop and buy groceries but Stan offered to take care of food tonight, and the kids aren't getting along well lately." Wendy shrugged, "Something about stealing each other's stuff, and Terrance and Phillip... if you ask me the show's had a pretty steep decline in quality."
"Yeah, it's all fart jokes now, no substance." Karen sighed, "I totally feel you, dude." There was a loud ringing suddenly, "Your phone." Karen mumbled under her breath. In record time, Wendy drew her phone,
"Hello?" Wendy answered the phone quickly.
"Hey there, Ms. Marsh! How's helping run the most fucked up place on Earth going?" came Kenny McCormick's cheerful, gruff voice. Wendy smiled - Kenny always injected a little happiness and optimism into the day, no matter how dreary it had been otherwise.
"Just swell, Kenny. How are you and Tammy?" she said dryly, with an air of professionalism to her voice - it seemed more she was speaking to a colleague than a close friend.
"We got an awful interestin' letter from a Mr. Token Black." Kenny's voice and tone remained firmly casual in nature - this was not a business call, why should he treat it like one?
"You too?" Wendy's tone had completely vanished, replaced with confusion and a hint of fear. She wasn't comfortable with this subject - no, she was worried and scared of Token and the possibility he was back.
"Seems Heidi taught him gentleness and he wants to make nice." Kenny explained quickly, recalling it from his memory.
"Heidi Turner? She was the biggest bitch in the entire High School! That's the biggest load of crap I've heard since last Christmas when Mr. Hankey sang for everyone." Wendy wasn't lying - Heidi had been almost like Cartman in her selfishness.
"Exactly, the story doesn't check out at first... but think about it. We haven't seen Token in a good three years. He did a lot of shit, but it's been a while, he really could have changed." Kenny's optimism returned - he, for one, was sure Token had changed. Wendy was not so sure, but memories and sympathy of the African-American boy she'd once been linked with floooded her mind.
"Well, he was a really nice boy back in the fourth grade... you know what, I think me and Stan may be attending after all." Wendy finally said after a moment of thought.
"We'll be there too then. Safety in numbers. I'll speak to you soon, Wendy, but I best get going." Kenny replied.
"Be safe, Detective." replied Wendy as she hung up and returned the phone to her purse, "Sorry Karen. You were saying?"
xXx
The lightening crackled fierce that evening.
The South Park Genetic Engineering Ranch was an enormous hotel-like structure built countless decades before the town itself, perched on a mountain and surrounded by dead trees and a long, metal fence. Within the confines of the building, Dr. Terrence A. Mephesto presided over the laboratory table, tearing apart the small animal before him with a scalpel - it seemed cruel but he knew he was helping it. The genetic defects of the small creature prevented it from running fast - the new legs would definitely improve it's quality of life. Such is the life of a genetic engineer.
Terrence had a pair of ghoulish brown eyebrows and piercing, icy eyes, wearing the same purple suit and orange overalls he often did, now his father's hat adorning his head. The genetic prodigy was quite suddenly interrupted by his lab assistant, "Yes, son?" he asked, having successfully detached the back legs from the animal. Alphonse II was very much his father's son - but he had inherited his mother's blonde hair and blue eyes as well as her pleseant facial features. But he held himself quite high and had an undying loyalty to his father - and to science.
"Mr. and Mrs. Broflovski are here for their pot-bellied elephant."
"Ah, yes, my most prized creation..." Terrence smirked as he answered the door, glad to have the Broflovski boy eating out of his hands. He hated Kyle dearly, but he had learned not to be too quick to remind the Jewish man that, and now he triumphantly could say Kyle was the one coming to him for help. "Hello Kyle."
Kyle Broflovski at twenty-nine was a looker. Auburn curls spilled out like a mop over is head, tamed under a fedora. His earthly brown eyes observed every detail of the Mephesto residence, as he wore a dark green suit with an orange tie. Next to him stood his petite wife, Rebecca. Once home-schooled and socially inept, she had learned psychology and sociology in her older years, and now was considered the most intelligent mind in the town. Something a respected scientist such as Terrence took great offense to. But having the smartest two people at his door in town, asking him for his services, was more than a pleasure - and he would not disappoint. The bushy-haired wife then said eloquently, "Hullo Doctor. Your wife called and informed us the pot-bellied elephant was indeed a success."
"Remind me to thank Elizabeth. Yes, it was. They said pig and elephant DNA just won't splice but I don't take no for an answer." Terrence grinned as he lead them to a cage, the small elephant leaving it. It was true - Terrence never took no for an answer when it came to his engineering. Nothing couldn't be solved, or caused by Science. All one needed was knowledge, a little money, and the right tools. Terrence had access to all of these in abundunce.
"It looks like a fine specimen." said Kyle with a smile at his childhood dream come true, inspecting the creature, "Why does it have two asses?"
"Oh, nevermind that, just a clause from my father's will." Terrence answered quickly.
"We'll take him. How's seven dollars sound?" Kyle offered, hoping to give the engineer his money's worth. He couldn't quite say he trusted Terrence Mephesto, but he felt a tie to the man, somehow. The old rivals stood there was Kyle took out his wallet, but Terrence's eyes narrowed.
"Seven dollars and forty nine cents."
xXx
Kevin J. Stoley was a man past thirty years, black moppy hair spilled on his head, brown eyes focused on the ham and cheese sandwhich in his hands. The Secience Fiction fan of his youth had become a meek, passive journalist, wearing a light blue jacket with red trim over a green T-shirt as he munched on lunch with his co-worker, the famous blue-eyed blonde bombshell Bebe Stevens, wearing a red suit and skirt with a pink undershirt, "So how's the weather look today, Bebe?" he asked.
"Fair, a little cloudy, Stormy weekend coming up ahead." Bebe said almost automatically. She may have been hired for her looks, but she had gotten genuinely good at her job. She, for one, was enjoying a salad - she had to watch her figure.
"I see." Kevin replied. This was little different than his elementary days, eating lunch with an attractive girl. That breathtaking redhead had since become his wife. Bebe was merely a friend who sometimes was eye candy. Still, the situation was similar regardless.
"How's things your side of the world, Stoley?" she asked, a hint of sarcasm in her reply. Bebe and Kevin had maintained a nice friendship since High School. Bebe had pretended to be Kevin's girlfriend once to keep his mom quiet, in fact - the plan failed pretty miserably, with Kevin's mother dissecting Bebe like a frog until she revealed the truth.
"Oh, you know, same old." Kevin mumbled as he downed another bite of bread and ham. He couldn't taste cheese that time. "Red's waiting to strike another deal after the last disaster, and Alan's taking after me in all the wrong ways."
"Get a letter... from, uh, Token?" A pause. Just the saying of the name was enough to cause both to look with caution. Their eyes looked in the opposite direction of themselves before returning to each other. Their shared anxiety softened slightly.
"I admit I have." Kevin said quietly, not enthusiastic at memories of Token's actions toward them. Token had quickly become cold and emotionless toward everyone in his early twenties, and his wealth and influence put him in the perfect place to be a tyrant over his old schoolmates.
"Inviting your family to the mansion?" Bebe said quizzically, "Cali? Whole weekend?" Bebe didn't like the idea of this at all - she wanted to stay home, eat ice cream and watch General Hospital - but alas, this wasn't in the cards for her.
"Yeah, I'm not sure about taking them. You and Clyde going?" Kevin asked. He had already made up his mind on going himself, but he wasn't sure whether he was so ready to bring his family into it.
"I think so... Clyde's very eager to go and catch up with his old friend again. I'm not so sure but you can't really say 'no' to Clyde." she chuckled, but there was a hint of insecurity in her voice - she didn't approve of her husband's judgement.
"I hear the Broflovskis and McCormicks are going." Kevin reported, "Not sure about anyone else."
"Well, I hope to see you there if you go." Bebe flashed her Emmy-winning smile as she took the last bite of her sandwhich and got up.
xXx
Tweek Bros. Coffee could appropriately be called a most wretched hive of scum and villainy. The classy males of South Park, those who avoided Skeeter's Bar, made their appearnaces here. The place was in all means lucky to stand - Harbucks reached a deal to let the Tweek family own the shop as a unit of Harbucks under the family name - since then, a young boy made his way through Harbucks corporate and became CEO and thanks to Tweek Tweak, now every Harbucks in the United States was under the banner of Tweek Bros. Coffee. The blonde had (mostly) overcome his powerful caffiene addiction, and now wore a gray, buttoned perfectly business suit with a black tie, his once messy blonde hair combed neatly. His favorite subordinate was the messy, sandy-haired Kevin McCormick, who managed the 'bar' of the store since Tweek's mother had retired the duty at her fiftieth birthday. A familiar group sat at the head of the bar.
Stan Marsh had become a handsome man with a strong chin, dark blue eyes, and raven hair spilled in a way that would remind one of his father, yet slightly more sophisticated. Over his brown-and-red jacket was a stereotypical lab coat - he'd just gotten back from his work as a veternarian, although many knew it wasn't the only job Stan had held over the years. "So Stan, how was work?" asked Kyle, his "super" best friend of over two and a half decades - or perhaps over his whole life is a more accurate description.
"'sup bro?" nodded Kenny to his old buddies, "Before I forget, will Eric be joining us this fine evening?" Kenny honestly wasn't in the mood to run into their old friend but he felt obliged to check in advance if the whole gang would be reuniting. Three out of five had shown up so far.
"It was pretty good. Had to bring another gay frog to the shelter though. The poor thing, someone just left it outside." Stan said, before chuckling, "Eventually." Stan was always an animal lover, and that trait had only strengthened over the years - becoming a veternarian was a dream of Stan so he could help animals in new ways. Helping out at the shelter wasn't enough for him.
"Hey guys." Tweek approached from another area, sitting near the guys. He owned the entire company, but right now he was content to sit with his friends at a local shop. Although he'd been cast from their group long ago, the kids reconciled their friendship with Tweek years later.
"Hey Tweek. So what's this meeting about, Kenny?" Kyle asked as Kevin handed them their coffee. It was earl gray, hot, a surprisingly popular flavor in the store. "Thanks Kevin." The barkeep nodded toward them before turning to other customers.
"On the house." Tweek said with a smile. His friends were provided free coffee when they were with him - Harbucks was a successful business enterprise, it wasn't much lost fare for in essence, three people. Butters was gone, and he refused to pay for Cartman. Tweek actually paid his own way off his salary.
"Token's letter." No elaboration was needed - all understood the subject and just how serious it was. The smiles faded and they were reluctant to discuss the issue, though all knew they needed to discuss it.
"Me and Wendy will be going." Stan said simply, "With Amanda and Shane. Her decision, not mine." he added - it was hard to tell whether he trusted his wife on this matter or not. Kenny felt a small pang of guilt, knowing he'd been partially responsible for this, but pushed away his feelings on the matter, nodding to them.
"Us too. Not sure if it's really a good idea for Jake and Rachel, but I have nobody to watch them if you guys go." He explained before taking a sip from his coffee. "But I told Tammy we'd try to find somebody, so hopefully we can get that taken care of."
"I'm not sure you guys." Kyle said, "Token's pulled a lot of shit over the years. There's not much of a reason to believe his honesty." he was stern, like a parent to children, "Then again, he's been quiet for three years now, I suppose it makes some sense." the Jewish man seemed to be arguing with himself.
"Ngh. It's a tough call." There was caffiene in Tweek's system - he was back to his old twitchy self fast, "A very tough call. Ack!"
"'sup asswipes?" the kids were joined by two - my bad, one large man their age. He had neatly combed brown hair, wild eyes one could not look into, and wore a military camouflage coat over a red shirt and brown khakis. He had a mustache, and his clothes were stained and disgusting.
"Well if it ain't Eric Theodore Cartman. Where's the wife and kids?" asked Kenny, raising an eyebrow at his friend. They hated Cartman but Kenny couldn't help but pity him - nobody really liked Cartman. Probably because he was a total asshole but still - he had no real friends. It was the only reason they let him hang out with them.
"Stupid author didn't give me any." he grumbled, "What do you assholes want?" Cartman sat between Kenny and Kyle - his usual spot in the group. The kids exchanged glances of worry, and Tweek chose to broke the silence,
"Nngh... did you get a letter from Token?"
"Him? That black asshole is still around?" Cartman laughed, the tubby rolls of fat over his body jiggling with each chortle in a way that made Kyle want to puke his brains out. Kenny, Stan, Kyle and Tweek exchanged looks of disgust at Cartman.
"Shut up fatass!" It was almost reflexive from Kyle to yell this - years of yelling at Cartman had made it become instinctive, with no thought involved in the process.
"Don't call me fat, you stupid Jew!" And years of calling Kyle a stupid Jew had imbued in Cartman an automatic, thoughtless ability to retort.
"Guys come on, this isn't solving anything." Stan went in between his two friends.
"Just like old times." Kenny nodded his head, letting the feeling of intense nostalgia for years long lost wash over him. It was like being nine and growing up again - except everyone was taller and only Kyle still wore his hat. "Sends me back. Reminds me-"
An unexpected visitor entered - he wore a collared light blue shirt buttoned up perfectly, had a wide ear-to-ear-grin, had a single puff of blonde hair, and stubble over his mouth. The thirty-year-old Butters Stotch still had a similar cheery voice, "Hey fellas!"
"Butters?" Kenny said in disbelief, shocked to see, "They let you out of prison?"
"That's me!" he said cheerfully, "Awh, shucks, yeah... the Warden said i-it's only a ten year sentence for, uh, armed robbery..." Butters said nervously, scratching the back of his head, "B-but I got let out on account of, uh, a good behavior. D-did you guys get a le-"
"From Token? Yep." Kyle nodded as Butters took a seat as well, joining them on the end by Kenny. It was hard to believe he'd gone completely back to normal after being last seen a hardened criminal.
"I can't wait to see you fellas there, it'll be real swell!" Butters smiled.
"I think everyone's going, even the Mephesto family." Kyle said with a shrug, "Terrence seemed optimistic about it, and Clyde told me he and Bebe are going and he knew Kevin was going. Tweek said Craig was going. Not to mention everyone's bringing their wives. I'm not sure about Timmy, Jimmy or Bradley... Well, we all seem to be going so... yeah, practically everyone."
"Who wouldn't? Token's mansion was huge, brah." Cartman smiled, arms crossed confidently. He wished he lived in such a luxurious mansion but nope, he was stuck as a poor fucking mechanic. Stupid asshole from TimeCorp as a kid lied to him. He was never a success.
"Oh boy!" Butters smiled, excited to be reconciling with all old friends, hugging the other five men, "I sure can't wait, fellers!"
"I'm still not so sure about this, guys." Stan said nervously, looking to his friends for support. Kenny put a consoling hand on his shoulder,
"Come on, dude, I mean think about it, what's the worst that can happen? Remember, between your wife, me and Bradley, there's enough law enforcement there to overpower Token or anything he thinks he can come up with."
"I guess you're right..." Stan said, "Well, I better get home. I promised Shane I'd take him to GameStop to pick up the new Homefront game. See you guys this weekend." Stan shrugged, finishing his coffee and getting up.