Okay, let me get this off my chest first. I do not hate Yaoi anymore. I used to, but I have calmed down, become more tolerant of it, I just wont read the M rated stuff. However, this is completely different as it is plain insanity.
Whoopee.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to Nintendo except for Snake who belongs to Konami.
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Ike you are a freaking genius! The blue haired and completely straight swordsman told himself. If there was any way to prove that he was heterosexual, he reasoned that it was best to affirm his interest in women.
By sneaking into the female locker room at the arena with a camcorder in hand. It made perfect sense to him.
However there was a few holes in this plan, one being the very nature of the people he was about to spy on.
First and the most obvious threat was Samus. You don't generally as a rule mess with someone who spends approximately 75 percent of the time in a suit of high tech armour with a laser cannon/rocket launcher for an arm. The rest of the time she nearly always had her plasma whip which stings like hell. Especially when hit with the tip.
Ike remembered seeing Bowser be launched off the bridge of Elfin by that. And he weighs around a ton.
Next was Lyn. Although she was rarely at the brawler's mansion she had a fiery temper and good aim with her sword.
Zelda could conjure fire in a few seconds and Peach… well she had good swing with a golf club. One that knocked out several of Bowser's teeth.
So in summary all the women in there could pin him down, eviscerate him and torch his corpse down to ashes if caught. Stealth was the only option available.
And considering that his stealth expertise boiled down to hiding in his room when it was time for chores he is for all intents and purposes screwed.
Slowly slinking in through the door to the locker room, he instantly pressed his back to the wall, looking to see if anyone was moving. When the coast seemed clear he sneaked further towards the shower-room, placing the video camera directly at the public showers and then tried hiding in one of the lockers. Which were all locked except for one.
Ike opened it to find none other than snake hiding inside it.
"Hey Ike go steal shampoo from else where would ya? I'm trying to get good look at the show." The mercenary said shutting the locker. Ike panicked for a while, desperately trying to pick the lock on one of the other lockers but failing miserably at it. Then he heard footsteps. A clicking of heels. 2 sets. Oh shit.
"Snake. Snake! SNAAAKE!" He banged on the locker in desperation.
"What was that?"
"Shit!" Ike cursed, he abandoned the video camera and tried climbing up on one of the locker sets when Peach and Zelda entered.
The lockers having an almost comedic sense of timing desided at this very moment to fall open revealing a slightly nervous Snake.
"Err… hello ladies?"
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Okay so maybe that was a bad idea, who knows what they're doing to Snake right now. Poor guy. Time for plan B.
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8 reviewers and over 200 hits? Wow that's impressive for the first chapter after a few days. Lets hope this continues.