Chapter 2
Cartman
Finally I realized what's going on. I'm a vampire. When the Twilight movies were a thing my mom made me watch them all with her. I'd never admit this to anyone but I actually liked them. So much that I read all the books. The vampires in the book lived the lives I've always wanted. Power, money and uhhh Love.
It all makes sense. That bitch Stephanie Myers didn't make it up. I must be immortal than. Cool.
I start the walk back to my house. This is going to be awesome. I'm going to be 17 forever. I'll be around for so long I that I'll become rich and powerful.
I pass Kenny's house and wonder what the guys have been up to.
Shit I'm going to outlive everyone I know.
Who needs those assholes? I have an eternity to meet cooler people.
But in the back of my mind there's a voice saying it doesn't matter. That I'll never be happy without them.
I try to ignore it but it just gets louder and I cave. As much as I hate to admit it to myself I need them.
Most people don't stick around me too long but somehow I've kept the same three friends for almost my entire life. Honestly I don't think I could ever find another person who will put up with my shit, definitely not another entire new group of friends.
I'm going to have to change them and I'm going to have to be smart about this. They can't know that I changed them because I need them emotionally. I need a reason. I'll have to convince them that I need them for other purposes. My vampire legion.
Each member of my legion would serve a purpose. I'm not putting up with any deadweight.
Kenny
I was feeling up this really hot girl with huge boobs. Things were about to get even hotter when she reached for my belt buckle. Out of nowhere she bit my neck sexily.
It's the pain that wakes me up. It burns and is slowly spreading through out my body. My eyes shoot open to my dark room.
Someone lifts and flings me over their shoulder in a fireman's carry. The pain is unbearable. I try to scream but I can't make a sound.
"Hey Kenny" whispers a voice. Cartman. "Don't worry man it'll all make sense soon" he continues. "I've got it all figured out"
What the hell is this asshole talking about? What the fuck is he doing to me. Everything hurts too much for me to move. I'm paralyzed. Carmen tightens his grip on me climbs out my
open window. If I could just die all this would be over.
Stan
That girl was kissing my neck again. At least I thought it was a girl. When her hand started stroking my inner thigh I wasn't so sure anymore. Even though her fingers were slender and long they were around the same size as mine, probably bigger. Was it a guy? I'm not gay. Am I?
Out of nowhere my neck starts burning. My eyes flutter open to a huge dark shape is sitting next me on my bed; my window is open.
"Hey Stan" greets Cartman casually. Before I can ask him what the fuck is going on a wave of pain washes over my body and I'm rendered helpless. Cartman somehow senses my pain.
"You'll understand soon Stan" explains Carman while, effortlessly throwing me over his shoulder. He carries me over to my window and jumps out of it. Right before we hit the ground I slip out of his arms and land face down in the snow. I can't feel it at all.
"Shit" curses Cartman and starts cracking up.
Fucking fatass.
Kyle
There's a sharp pain in my neck. I shoot up in bed and bump my head on something really hard. My head throbs along with my neck. Somehow the pain from my neck is spreading to my chest.
"Woah that didn't hurt at all" says Cartman's voice. "You just slammed your forehead into my chin and that didn't even hurt" he continues surprised.
"What the hell…?" is all I can choke out before the pain completely takes over.
"You'll be thanking me for this later Jew" says Cartman. He picks me up and slings me over his right shoulder.
What the hell is he doing? He approaches the window I just noticed was open and tightens his grip on my legs. No no no no. Cartman launches out the window but somehow lands on his feet in my front yard. My body's on fire. What the fuck did he do to me?