Chapter 2
It was cold that night. Spencer remembered it very well. It was cold and windy and she had a bit too much to drink with Emily. She stumbled out of the barn and around the side of the house, leaning against the side of the house to support herself as she carried the rubbish to the bin. She delicately threw away the bottles, trying not to be too loud and heaved the lid back on before stumbling up the steps to her house. She was almost inside when out of the corner of her eye she spotted a familiar looking vehicle parked stalling across the street. Without a moment's hesitation she leaped over to the car and let herself in.
"Holly crap, what are you doing?" asked a befudled Paige.
"Drive" ordered Spencer, her sight not fixed on her but on the window of her neighbor's house across the street. Paige did as she was ordered, fearing facing the wrath of a Hastings if she failed to do what she was told, and drove down the street until she reached a park. She turned the ignition off and waited for Spencer to talk but Spencer wouldn't start, looking at Paige, holding her gaze, full of questions.
"Okay, I know what this looks like-"
"You're watching her house? What are you, A or something? Seriously?"
"I know, it's wrong, but I just had to make sure she was doing it!"
"Doing what?"
"Keeping Emily safe... making her happy... being with her."
"Paige..."
"I can't just come up to her and ask her these things. Not after everything... How is she?"
"Honestly?"
"Honestly? No. Honesty's not gonna help me sleep tonight. Tonight I need to know she's fine and that she's happy and moving on with her life so I can crawl back into my hole and pass out without making a mess of things."
"In that case she's doing fine. She has completely moved on with Alison and she doesn't cry for you anymore. Since you've been gone she hasn't shed a single tear and it's all been coming up roses in her life. She got a promotion and she's got adorable twins and every night she and her girlfriend have amazing sex. Is that what you wanted to hear?"
"No, but it's what I needed. It's what I deserve after what I did to her."
"Paige you didn't do anything to her. You did it for her. You did what was best for her. And yeah it blows but you were the only one who had the balls to do that and for that I admire you"
"Spence-"
"No, you listen to me now. I never said it before but you're the best thing that's ever happened to her. I've done some stupid things like accusing you of being A and trying to keep Emily away from you and you've always just taken it on the chin. You never held a grudge or did anything to hurt her. And you've always supported her and done what was best for her, even if it meant breaking your own heart in the process and I have nothing but respect for you Paige but what you did? Leaving her? That was just dumb. I'm sorry."
"Why are you sorry? You're not the one who knocked Alison up with Emily's eggs or the one who told her just before we... Just as we got together. You're not the one who hurt her shoulder or killed her dad or the person who rammed into my car in college. You didn't do anything wrong Spence."
"I did. I should've fought for you. I should've fought and rationalized and made her see what was really happening but I was just so involved in what was going on with my own family that I just wasn't there... I didn't help you Paige. I wasn't there for you and Em when you needed me most and for that, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all the ways I came between you and for all the time you wasted because of me because you didn't deserve that, Paige, you're a good person and you deserved to be happy with Em but you didn't get your happy ending and I'm sorry for my part in that."
A long pause fell between the two women. It was true that Spencer was caught up and while she might have had some influence, Paige knew that no matter what, the power always lay with Alison. While it would be easy catharsis to blame Spencer for not fighting for her and take it out on the girl who was essentially offering herself up as an emotional punching bag, Paige knew that it would not solve or fix anything, least of all her broken heart, so she gave Spencer a pat in the back and started the car back up. She pulled a U-turn and drove Spencer back to her house, dropping her off just barely out of sight of the DiLaurentis manor, and she said goodbye, and that she forgave her, and Spencer swore she heard Paige muffle a sob as she rolled the window up and drove away. She took one last look at the Christmas decorations inside Emily's house through the front facing window and went back in. She wondered why Paige would worry about Emily tonight when it hit her like a jackhammer. She checked her calendar and sure enough, tonight was the day before Thanksgiving. Emily always decorated for Christmas before that day because she'd be so excited 'cause her dad was coming home. She used to decorate until College, when her father passed away. Ever since then, this season in particular had been a time of mourning for Em. That's why she'd come to check on her tonight.