DISCLAIMER: Paramount may own them, but they
don't know how to do these poor characters justice.
Why they let Jeri Taylor and Lisa Klink leave, we'll
never know...and they'll never recover from it.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: We just want to say one thing
here. We started this whole series nearly a year
ago. This particular part was written I believe in June
or July of last year. When we saw information about
the VOYAGER episode "Someone to Watch Over
Me," we nearly died. There isn't much 7/EMH
fanfiction out there, besides what you see here.
Could it be coincidence? Or have some at
Paramount been perusing the fanficworld????
Fortune 2: One is the Loneliest Number
by Lorre and Stormwriter
Marie sat in her quarters, slowly shuffling the cards
in
her hands. She wasn't really paying attention to
what
she did, and her readings made that more than
evident.
Thankfully, she had no clients to read for. She
sighed
softly, began to put the cards away. *Perhaps a
nap will
do me some good,* she thought to herself. As she was
blowing out the candles surrounding her living room, she
heard the chime. "Come in."
The Emergency Medical Holographic Doctor stuck his
head into the room. He moved, and Seven appeared
behind him. "I don't understand the nature of this visit,
Doctor. Why must we participate in something that has
no basis in science?" Seven of Nine did not realize that
Marie could hear her.
The Doctor replied in he normal clipped tones, "I told
you, Seven, if you are going to interact with the
individuals on this ship, you must understand the nature
of their being." He pushed her farther forward. Seven
glared back at him, but the Doctor ignored it. "Hello
Marie, how are you feeling today?"
"I'm just fine," she replied, smiling. "Hello, Seven."
Then she looked at the two of them. "What can I do for
the two of you? You don't normally come around to the
crew quarters like this."
Seven looked at Marie with a certain amount of disdain.
She did not want to be there, that much was apparent.
"The doctor feels that I should have my fortune read. He
says it is the human," She spat the last word out, "...the
human thing to do."
The doctor nodded in agreement. "I hope we are not
intruding."
Marie stifled back a smirk. "No, not at all. I was just
relaxing. I can do your reading, Seven." She motioned to
the table in the corner, the physical reminder of her
familial legacy. "Please, Seven, have a seat."
She watched the young woman sit down warily. "This is
irrelevant. I do not need my fortune read. This is a futile
attempt to control the future."
Marie smiled again, inwardly sighing. "It's alright to be
wary of a reading, Seven, but I assure you, you have
nothing to fear."
Seven caught Marie's eyes, "Fear is irrelevant. You may
proceed." Even though her voice was firm, her eyes were
wary.
Marie smiled. "May I have your hand?" At the
confused look in Seven's eyes, she smiled
sympathetically. "I only ask to have your hand to read
your palm. It is painless, Seven, I assure you."
Seven's hand shot out towards Marie, even in this she
demonstrated her Borg efficiency. "You may read my
palm." The Doctor only chuckled, at Seven's apparent
fear.
Marie snickered softly herself, taking the hand. She ran
her fingertips lightly over the pale skin, surprised at how
soft it was. "How interesting," she said softly. "Your
lifeline is strong, and of a decent length." She traced the
line lightly, showing Seven. Part of her mind went back
to the reading she'd done for Tuvok and Harry two
weeks earlier. "And here," she pointed to another line,
"this is your heart line. This is also very prominent, not
deep, but prominent." An image of Harry's smiling face
floated in her field of vision.
Seven, confused, looked at Marie. "What exactly does
that mean?" Her curiosity was an excellent sign.
Mentally blinking away the image of Harry, Marie looked
up at Seven. "It means you will fall in love only once,
and it will last a long time." She pointed to the other
distinguishing lines and mounds as she continued.
"This shows that you have a flair for the dramatic and
creative." She looked up at the young woman. "Perhaps
the captain would let you use her Da Vinci program to
test your creative talents." And then she blinked in
surprise. "Oh my...."
Appalled Seven shot back, "What Lieutenant?" The
anxiety was evident in her voice.
Marie looked into the wide blue eyes. "Seven, according
to your palm, you have a knack for clairvoyance. Have
you ever had visions?"
Uncomfortably, Seven shifted in her seat. "My visions
are none of your business, Lieutenant. The doctor has
informed me that they are just by products of my
experience as a Borg." She yanked her hand away.
The Doctor pulled on Seven's arm a little. "How about
reading my palm, Marie." He knew it would be
inaccurate, even if the telling of the future was true.
Seven got up, and the Doctor sat down. He winked at
Marie.
Marie smiled. "I've never done a reading for a hologram,
but I can give it a shot." She looked at Seven. "I really
think you should consider lessons to open up your
latent clairvoyance." When Seven didn't respond, she
turned to Doc's palm. She was surprised to find the lines,
whorls, and mounts clearly defined. "My goddess, Doc,
I didn't know holograms were so finely detailed as to
have fingerprints and all."
"Yes Marie, I am an exact replica of my creator, Dr.
Zimmerman." The Doctor nodded proudly. He was
attempting to hide his anxiety about the procedure. He
didn't know if it was possible, but Marie seemed to think
it was.
She looked at his palm and smiled. "Is it just me or is this
ship filled with people who are long-lived?" Then she
snickered softly. "Then again, we have a Vulcan and a
hologram among our crew. Dr. Zimmerman has a very
long lifeline."
The EMH snorted, "This is true when you think about it.
His image, as a holographic emergency doctor, is on
many of Starfleet's finest ships. In essence he will live
forever." The Doctor smiled with that burst of logic.
She couldn't help but laugh heartily at that. "I'm sorry,"
she replied, calming down. "That just struck me as
funny." She cleared her throat. "And you also have a
creative flair, but we already know that from your studies
of opera."
The Doctor looked at Marie, and smirked. "Are you
going to inform me of something that I don't know?"
She studied his palm again. "Let me see...." She studied
again, and an image entered her mind. "Did you know
that Dr. Zimmerman was a twin?"
Shocked, the Doctor nearly pulled his hand back. "No, I
had no idea." A puzzled look crossed his face, "Can you
tell me more?" Her giving information about his creator
was like hearing about his father he supposed.
The vision was settling into her psyche, so much so,
Marie wasn't distinguishing between the hologram and
his creator. "You were the older of twin boys. Your
name is Louis, your brother's name was David. You were
five minutes apart, and distinguished by--"
"By mirrored moles on your shoulder blades," came the
rest of the sentence from Seven. She shook her head,
then looked at Marie. "Do not do that! Do not push
yourself on me!"
Marie stared at Seven. "I didn't do anything, Seven.
You saw that yourself. You see it as clearly as I do.
Finish it, Seven. Tell Doc what else you see."
Seven shook her head. "No, I will not do it. Get it out of
my head," she growled, glaring at Marie.
"No, Seven, you have to tell it, or it won't leave your
mind," Marie said softly, gently touching her arm. "Talk
to me, Seven. What else do you see?"
Seven screwed her eyes tightly shut. "David died
accidentally as a small child, drowned in a wading pool.
Louis was forced to excel in his studies to compensate
for his parents' loss." She blinked, looked at Marie,
shaking her head slightly. "That is all there is," she
whispered, swaying slightly.
The Doctor sat there speechless, completely unable to
put a string of words together. Then it hit him. "I have a
mole, but it was placed on the opposite shoulder as his."
The doctor shook his head, unable to allow himself to
comprehend the meaning of the situation.
Marie carefully watched the young blonde, knowing
what it was like to come out of an unexpected trance.
And she watched the EMH as well. "Doc, I'm sorry. I
didn't expect to find something so....devastating in your
reading."
"No," he replied, actually looking pale. "It's alright. It
makes sense." He was silent for a long moment, then
looked at the two of them. "I have chosen a name."
Marie smiled at him. "Welcome to Voyager, David."
It seemed as if the Doctor, David, was looking more
inward than out. "I think this concludes the lesson for
today, Seven." He needed to be alone to sort things out.
"Yes I quite agree, Doctor." Seven headed out the door
of Marie's quarters like a lightning bolt, but the Doctor
stayed back.
"Marie, can you tell anything at all about," He paused,
"...about my love life." It was a hesitant question, and
one phrased directly about himself.
Marie was torn. She wanted to go after Seven, make sure
the young woman was alright. And at same time, she
knew that Doc needed her help. She looked at him, took
his hands in hers, concentrating on his face. After a few
long, tense moments, she blinked. "I'm sorry, David, but
right now, all I see is images of those twin boys."
Defeated the Doctor turned to leave. "I was just
wondering...no...never mind." He paused at the door
leading out of her quarters for a split second.
"David," Marie called out quietly, stopping him. "I see
no reason you shouldn't let Seven know how you feel.
She saw the vision just as clearly as I did."
The Doctor raised his eyebrows. "No one knows about
my feelings, Marie. And she is too innocent to care." His
words were cold, calloused, a tone that Marie had never
heard before from him.
"That's not true." She stood and went to him. "You are
just as entitled to your feelings as anyone else aboard
this ship. Seven needs someone who is kind and
compassionate. You are both, David, and more." She
stared at him. "Why do you doubt this?"
David caught her eye, "I doubt this because deep in my
non existent heart, I know that I am nothing more than a
hologram. I was Created for a purpose, to help the ship
in times of need." The ache in his voice nearly brought
Marie to her knees.
Marie gripped his face in her hands, eyes boring into his.
"That was when you were only to be an emergency,
short term program. You have far surpassed the
expectations of your creators. You have become a
member of this crew, with opinions, likes, dislikes,
friends, *feelings.* You have every right to want what
the rest of us want." She felt him move to turn away,
held her grip. "Listen to me, David. You have grown
beyond your programming. How else would I know this
information about your creator? Things you didn't
know? And how would Seven know?"
The doctor nodded sadly at Marie. "I have no answers
for you. I only know what my non existent heart is telling
me. I am nothing more than finely programmed bits of
energy, with no hope of seeing through the potential
behind that wonderful woman." With that he turned and
left.
Marie's shoulders sagged in defeat. She'd failed in
helping out two people who'd come to her. She scared
Seven, and depressed David. Two people with great
potentials running from those very potentials. And now
she felt worse than she had when they'd walked in.
Marie looked around her empty quarters. She sighed
heavily and exited, heading towards the mess hall.
Perhaps if she found Seven she could straighten things
out.
Marie walked with purpose, only nodding at people who
passed. Normally she would have taken time to talk with
her friends, but she didn't have time. She needed to find
Seven, explain to her what she saw. She rounded the
corner, about to enter the Mess Hall, when she ran into
Harry Kim.
"Whoa! Slow down, Marie!" he said, hands on her
shoulders. "What's the rush?" Then he saw the defeat
in her eyes, and the determination. "What's wrong?"
"Messed up readings...confused people...should be
together...too afraid..." She didn't finish any ideas, just
flitted from one to the next.
"Wait, stop, you're not making any sense." Harry placed
a lingering hand on her arm. He felt the strong pull for
her wash over him again. An ache that he never had
known grew in the region of his heart. He felt a need to
protect this woman, and it was a novel feeling. Even with
Libby he didn't feel this way. Libby took care of herself,
Marie simply needed someone. He hoped that someone
could be him.
She felt something break into her thoughts. An image.
An image of her in Harry's arms, safe, protected....loved.
She knew that Harry and she were destined to be
together, but Harry didn't seem to want anything more
than friendship. She took a deep breath. "Seven and
David came for a reading. I saw things that upset both of
them. I wasn't able to calm David. I need to make an
attempt to calm Seven."
Harry looked confused. "Who in the world is David? I
don't know of any David on board the ship."
"David. David Zimmerman. Doc Zimmerman. The
Doctor," she said. She broke free of his light grip. "No
offense, Harry, but I really need to go find Seven. She is
very upset."
Harry hesitated, he wanted to ask her to dinner. He had
waited too long, she disappeared into the mess hall. He
debated on following her. Marie seemed to only want
friendship, but his heart was wanting more. He followed
her inside.
Just as she entered the mess hall, she saw the captain. A
blinding vision stopped her in her place. The captain
crying in the darkness...alone. She moved to the
woman's side. "Captain? How are you doing?"
"Oh, hello, Marie," came the reply as she looked up from
her report. "I'm doing just fine. Why do you ask?"
"Just curious. Um, how are you and Tuvok doing?"
Puzzled, Kathryn looked up at Marie. "What do you
mean? Tuvok has always been my friend. Marie, why
would anything be wrong?" Her private feelings were
deeply buried inside of her. She must be strong,
Chakotay's choice still smarted. There was no one to
trust.
Marie touched her arm. The vision came stronger.
"Captain, you are denying your feelings. Why do you
deny what is destined for you? I would think that the
incident two weeks ago had shown you who was
destined to be your lifemate."
Kathryn looked back at Marie, and replied in her coldest
voice. "That man is my friend, and is married to one of
my dearest friends." Even though she was cold, so cold
she could be called an ice maiden, a brief flash of pain
shot through her eyes.
Marie leaned down, eye level with Kathryn. "That man
loves you enough to forget T'Pel." She took a deep
breath, knowing she fought a strong woman. "And if
you had half the sense to listen to your heart, you'd
know I speak the truth." She stood again. "Good day,
Captain."
Kathryn sat there pondering the situation. She glanced
over at where Tuvok was eating alone. He glanced up
and caught her eyes. For a moment in time their eyes
caught, and sparks flew. Kathryn's breath caught in the
back of her throat. No, this could not happen. This
absolutely could not happen. Tuvok's face continued to
remain as stoic as it normally did, but for a brief moment
she thought she could see down into the depths of his
dark soul. Even through the Vulcan facade, his dark
mystery taunted her. It had always taunted her. Even
though his face held no emotion, his eyes hungrily
devoured her. She had to get away, she couldn't face
this. She didn't want to face it. Alone was
the only way she could exist.
Marie watched...and felt...the entire exchange, tho' it was a brief few
seconds. She also watched as Kathryn left the mess hall, as if demons
nipped at her heels. And a moment later, Marie's eyes followed Tuvok as
he went after her. Shaking her head slightly, Marie moved to the corner
where Seven sat, curled in a ball, staring out at the stars passing by.
"May I join you?"
"If you feel it is appropriate, Lieutenant." Her cold voice sounded as if
it was a million light years away.
Marie sat carefully, eyes on Seven's tense face. "You have no reason to
fear what you saw, Seven. You have a gift. You should expand on it. I
am willing to help you."
Seven glared at Marie. "How the hell do you know what I saw?" She sat
there shaking.
"You saw the twin boys, saw the death of David. You saw their moles. That
is quite an insight." And then she felt fear, understood its origin.
"What else did you see, Seven?" she asked softly.
Seven continued to shake. "I don't know how to explain it. He was touching
me, but not as a Doctor would." She shivered, but not from cold. The
visions washed over her again.
Marie rested a hand on the younger woman's arm. She had a feeling she
knew what Seven was talking about, that she felt as David did. "Tell me
what all you saw, Seven. I can help."
"How can you help me Marie? I see things I do not understand, I feel
things I do not know how to define. You explain to me how I must feel, as
it seems you know everything." Seven glanced back at the portal.
"I need to know exactly what you saw, Seven, beyond the vision we shared,"
she paused a moment. "What do you mean he was touching you, but not as a
doctor would? How was he touching you? And was it David?"
"Yes it was David, the doctor of this ship. And he was touching me, as if
he liked it. He was touching my bare skin." Seven groaned unconsciously
at the thought.
Marie thought she knew what Seven meant, but needed verification.
"Touching you how, Seven? As...as a lover would?" She held her breath,
waiting for Seven's reply. So much rode on this.
Seven shot a look of pure embarrassment at Marie, then the customary
stoicism returned to her face. "I wouldn't know, I haven't had a lover
Marie."
"Then I need to know exactly how he touched you, Seven. That, or how it
made you feel. Did it bother you? Or did you enjoy it?"
Seven paused, then replied. "I do not feel comfortable describing that to
you.
The feelings were not painful, and yet they were. He seemed fascinated,
by
my...." She indicated her right breast with a small gesture of her hand.
"I understand, Seven. I think what would be best is talking to David
about this. He is confused and worried. The two of you need to talk
about this," she said, then smiled. "And you and I need to work on
honing your talents."
Seven continued to look out the window. "What would
be the point Lieutenant? David would only give me a
diagnostic and say it was the transition again." A pained
look traveled across her face, and one solitary tear fell
down her cheek.
Marie felt the pain. She moved closer, reached up to
wipe away the tear, causing Seven to look at her. "I
happen to know for a fact that's not what he'd say,
Seven. Go to him, talk to him, tell him how you feel. I can
guarantee he feels the same way."
Seven looked incredulously at Marie. "Not on your life,
but I will give consideration to what you say." She
stood, anxious to be alone. She walked away, not
looking back at the distraught Marie.
Marie sat there, staring out at the stars, needing to find
some sort of resolution to what she'd felt from the five
people she'd touched.
***
Kathryn left the Mess Hall, quickly making her way
to
her quarters. She hoped she wouldn't meet anyone.
She
was unnerved by what Marie had said....and by what
she'd seen in Tuvok's eyes. But what upset her the
most
was what she'd felt when she looked into those dark
eyes. "Captain!" she heard from behind her.
"Please
wait." It was Tuvok. Should she stop and wait? Or
should she just pretend she didn't hear him and
continue
on?
Tuvok hurried up to her. He had seen the look of
pure
fear on her face. In an effort to stop her, he reached
out
and grabbed her arm. She whipped around to face
him,
pure terror in her eyes. "Are you alright, Captain?"
There was a note of urgency in his voice. She was
in
pain, he could feel it. Automatically he reached out
to
touch her face. He needed contact, he needed to
know
she was alright. His fingers tenderly brushed her cheek,
and his mind unconsciously searched out for hers.
This was far more intimate than a mind meld. It was a
touch of a Vulcan male for his mate, one of comfort. He
reached out with his mind, with the brush of his hand.
Kathryn pulled away, or tried. "Please don't, Tuvok."
She was scared, of something she refused to
acknowledge.
"Kathryn," Even though his voice remained stoic, his
mind pleaded with her. His logic was weak, he didn't
know how this had happened. She was hurting, because
of him. Even though he didn't exactly understand why,
he wanted to help.
She wanted to fight him, but at the sound of her name
from his lips, so tortured a sound, her resolve crumbled.
"Tuvok?" she whispered. "What's happening?" The
tears were spilling down her cheeks. Tears of betrayal,
tears of regret, tears of fear, tears of need. "Tuvok,
what's happening?" she asked, a hand unconsciously
going up to stroke his cheek. At the contact of her skin
with his, his powerful thoughts washed over her. All she
could whisper was, "This can not be happening." It
became a mantra, a refusal to believe the powerful
connection they shared.
"Kathryn," Tuvok whispered again softly. She didn't
know if it was said by his mind or by his mouth. He
splayed his fingertips across her face, attempting to
maintain as much contact as he could. He needed her
essence, he drank it in. Tuvok needed to know deep
inside if she was okay. Still she continued to fight what
was happening.
She felt his touch, physical and mental. She craved it,
felt whole with it. Yet she fought it. Her mind continued
to show her images of Tuvok and T'Pel. This was her
best friend, her *married* best friend. This couldn't be
happening. She couldn't have these feelings for him, nor
he for her. What was happening? She needed him,
needed to know he was real, their connection was real.
Unconsciously, her hands mimicked his, fingers splaying
across the skin of his face. "Oh, Tuvok."
Kathryn's face inched forward. It was beyond her
control. It hovered near his own. His hot breath
caressed her lips, her cheeks, her nose. It made her
eyelashes flutter, making her wonder what it would feel
like to have him brush her eyes for a kiss.
They were heedless of the passers by. Not noticing the
shocked faces of the crewmen. Kathryn's eyes locked on
his lips, wondering, knowing that he could hear what she
was feeling. Scared of the intense feelings washing over
her she met his eyes. She seemed to drown in their
depths. He craved to have their lips make contact as
well. Kathryn knew if it happened, that she would
forever be lost. Vulcan's were touch telepaths, and
nothing was more sacred nor intimate than a kiss.
"No," Kathryn yelled as she pushed away from him.
"Please, this can't happen." She begged. It was a side of
Kathryn he had never seen before. He knew that she
was trying to be strong for both of them, but it was too
late. The beginning of a bond had been forged.
***
Harry watched Marie from across the mess hall. He saw
her confrontation with the captain, followed by
Janeway's retreat, Tuvok hot on her trail. He saw her
conversation with Seven, then Seven also leaving. With
each passing moment, he saw the woman become more
and more depressed. It wounded him deeply to see her
thus. He needed to do something. Replicating two cups
of Marie's favorite blend of tea, he slowly moved to sit
next to her. Pushing the cup in front of her, he softly
said, "Mind if I join you?"
Marie jumped at the sound of his voice. She'd felt him
coming, but his voice broke the silence that had settled
around her, startling her. She shook her head.
There she sat, sipping her tea, refusing to tell him what
was wrong. Harry waited for her to say something, but
when she didn't talk he felt the need to ask. "Can you
now tell me what is going on with you, Marie?"
***
Kathryn stared at him, quivering. She felt lost, bereft of
his touch, his presence. She wanted only to fall back
into his arms, but something stopped her. T'Pel stopped
her. She could see in his eyes what she meant to him,
knew he meant the same to her. She felt a faint buzzing in
the back of her mind, knew it was his presence. The
bond had begun. There was no denying it. Gods, but
she wanted this, wanted it like nothing ever before,
wanted it more than she'd ever wanted Chakotay. At that
sudden revelation, a tortured sob escaped her tightly
clenched lips, and she ran off, tears clouding her vision.
She couldn't face him, not now.
***
Marie continued to stare out at the stars, knees now
curling up toward her chin, just as she'd earlier found
Seven. At the thought of the young Borg, her
depression deepened. "I've made a mess of too many
lives," she whispered. "My magick is hurting too many
people. I never should have agreed to what Neelix
asked."
Harry reached out and grabbed her hand in comfort.
"Take that back, Marie. Your magick hasn't hurt anyone.
I have never seen Commander Chakotay so happy as he
is now with Sam." He squeezed, "Your magick also was
rumored to have saved the Captain from that crewman
who attacked her. How can you say it has hurt so many
people?"
"Do you know what my magick has done?" She finally
turned to look at him, let him see the tears slipping down
her cheeks. "The captain refuses to admit her feelings
for the man she loves. David feels he'll never be good
enough for the woman he loves. Seven doesn't
understand her feelings, nor her gift. And now I've
dragged y-- Never mind."
"What do you mean you dragged....who? Me?" Harry
questioned. He let what he said hang in the air for
several minutes. He turned her palm face up and began
to trace her life line softly with his thumb. "You know
what I think, Marie? I think you need to relax." He
paused, waiting for a response. He went on, after
watching her shiver slightly. "I know exactly how you
need to relax as well." He let that hang between them for
a moment. "How about you come over for dinner, my
replicator rations, and use my tub?" Harry was playing
his trump card as he knew that she only had a shower in
her smaller quarters. There were privileges being a senior
officer, even if she had more rank than him.
A bath. A real bath. No holographic simulation. Real
water. Real bubbles. She ached for that luxury. But at
what price? Could she possibly accept? This was Harry.
This was the man she was destined to be with. She
looked at him, saw the sincerity in his eyes. Warm brown
eyes, full of compassion....and something more. "I don't
know, Harry. I wouldn't want to intrude." She shivered
at his touch against her hand, but hadn't the strength to
remove it.
"You wouldn't be intruding, and you know it. How long
has it been since you allowed yourself to immerse in the
real liquid silk of a bubble bath." Harry chuckled. "I will
even be a gentleman and desert my quarters if
necessary."
She thought about it for a long minute, debating the pros
and cons of the situation. She needed the comfort of a
long soak in a hot bath, especially now. This last set of
visions drained her more than she'd ever thought
possible. Finally, she tentatively smiled at him. "Okay,
Harry, I accept."
Harry smiled. That was one battle he had won. She
wouldn't know what hit her. "How about 1900 hours,
Marie?"
"1900 hours would be perfect," she replied, then realized
how soon it would be. "Um, do I need to bring
anything?" She thought to herself, *I'll have to take a
shower and look nice before I go to see him.* She
laughed unconsciously at the thought. Taking a shower
to take a bath.
"No, just bring your beautiful self." Harry said as he
chuckled.
At that, she blushed. Feeling a surge of emotions for the
young man, her hand tightened around his for a brief
moment before she stood. "I -- I should go get my things
ready for my bath. 1900 hours is rather soon."
She felt Harry's hand tighten around hers, lift it to his
lips, barely brushing her knuckles. "I wait with bated
breath, my lady," he murmured, then released her hand.
***
Kathryn lay sprawled on her bed. It had been a long time
since she had allowed herself to cry this hard. She teared
up now and then, but her body racked with sobs. She
didn't know what to do, she felt so alone. Her mind
reached out, the buzz of him was there, but nothing more.
Gods her body ached for him, but it could not be.
"Tuvok," Kathryn whispered softly to the empty dark
room. If her crew could see her now, they would laugh
seeing Kathryn Janeway brought to the point of
breaking. She needed to collect herself, but her heart
ached for the one thing she could not let herself have. If
Chakotay had been problematic, Tuvok was even more
so.
And the thought of Chakotay brought back her earlier
revelation, and its companion pain. As much as she'd
wanted Chakotay, wanted him in her life, it paled in
comparison to the feelings she felt for Tuvok. The man
was just....hers. She knew deep down that he was hers if
she would but give the word. But she couldn't bring
herself to say that word. She felt fear in the face of the
depths their union could have; and betrayal of a dear
friend. If they got home, what would T'Pel think?
Kathryn realized that T'Pel, being Vulcan, was trained not
to have any emotions on that, but she also knew that
deep down inside Vulcans did feel. They just
suppressed it.
The desire for him was at the most basic of levels.
Kathryn just ached to reach out and touch him. It was an
insane craving of the likes she had never experienced
before. Tears streamed down her face as she lay,
sprawled on her bed. She shivered with cold, the cold of
loneliness, the cold of a body long denied the heat of
another being. The shivering traveled down her body,
till it was so violent that one could not tell the difference
between it and the sobs that wracked through her.
Kathryn whispered his name unconsciously,
wishing..hoping..wanting him there.
Then amazingly he was. Strong arms wrapped around
her body, his hand traveled to touch her face. The skin
on skin contact, brought his essence inside of her mind.
Tuvok sat there, holding Kathryn's shaking body,
allowing her to feel his presence in her mind. "You are
not alone Kathryn. You will never be alone." If the
Vulcans feared anything, it was this. They understood
the need, not to be alone.
She barely registered the words, focusing more on the
emotions involved, on his touch, his essence
surrounding and filling her. And then his words
penetrated her mind. "You are not alone." Chakotay
said that to her, so many times. And again, the sense of
betrayal rocked her near senseless. Tears sprang forth
again, and she curled herself tighter to his chest, wishing
only to melt into his body, become one with him, ease the
pain and guilt battering at her already bruised heart.
"Do not cry so, Kathryn, there is no need," his voice,
whether physical or mental, soothed her weary soul. He
felt her turmoil. Surprisingly, he had none. He had
already resolved his feelings for T'Pel. And as for
Chakotay....the man had given up this incredible woman
of his own volition. There was no need for guilt or
betrayal there. If only he could convince Kathryn of the
same.
Tuvok grabbed Kathryn's face between his hands and
rolled her under his body so he had her pinned. He felt
her softness mold against him, as he continued to caress
her face. "Kathryn," He whispered, his fingers splayed
against her cheek and forehead. His mind reached out to
her, to show her she wasn't alone. "My mind to your
mind, your thoughts to my thoughts." Tuvok's voice
said softly.
She struggled against him at first, at the sound of those
words. But the feel of his warm weight atop her, and that
growing buzz that was his presence in her mind,
overcame her and she lay silent. She reminded herself to
take deep breaths, to keep the oxygen supply fresh. She
felt his presence within her mind, welcomed it with a loud
sob, eyes fluttering shut.
*Tuvok*
*Yes, I am with you, Kathryn.*
*Don't leave me.* Kathryn's mind pleaded. *Everyone I
have ever loved has deserted me. There is no one now.*
*I am here, Kathryn. I will never leave. You are not
alone.* His mind reached out to comfort her, as his body
vainly attempted to.
Fear continued to wash over Kathryn, as she fought her
feelings for Tuvok. *Everyone leaves....T'Pel.*
Tuvok allowed her access to his memories of the
arranged marriage, one necessary to combat the curse
known as pon farr. *I won't leave you, Kathryn. I can't
leave you, not now...not in this lifetime.* Tuvok's
physical body gathered her closer into himself, and
finally she snuggled into him. *You have fought so long
and hard, to get us back to our families, Kathryn. No one
seems to have given any thought to you. Rest, Kathryn,
rest and let me bear your burdens if only for this one
night.*
Kathryn sighed heavily, and burrowed her face in his
chest, his heart lulling her into the sleep she needed,
safe, protected....loved.
***
Marie looked into the duffle bag one last time, verifying
its contents. Satisfied, she zipped it up, then quickly left
toward Harry's quarters. She was running late, and felt
nervous as hell. Outside his door, she rang the chime
and waited to enter. Fear crept around her heart. *What
are you doing, Marie? Playing with fire?* her mind
taunted. *Go back to your quarters. Beg out of this. Tell
him you've got a headache. This isn't right.*
Before she could rebut against herself, the door slid open
to reveal Harry standing there. He wore tan slacks and a
cream colored top. He looked heavenly. And just
behind him, she could see the flicker of candles lighting
the room.
Harry bowed in a courtly manner. A soft grin bespoke of
a secret that he was hiding. "Come in, mon amie." He
smiled and indicated that she should enter. The candles
flickered on the wall of the main living area. The room
was scented with roses, but she could not find the
source. "Would you care for something to eat now, or
perhaps would you like to eat in the bath, madam?"
Harry continued to make a exaggerated production of the
whole fair. Soft jazz played in the background.
She smiled hesitantly, bit her lower lip. "If you don't
mind, I'd really like that soak in the bath, then we could
eat....unless you have dinner ready." She watched him,
unconsciously clutching the bag in her hands. She
wanted to soak...wanted to eat...wanted to run...wanted
to wrap herself in his arms and never leave.
Harry only smiled warmly and replied. "Your bath is
already waiting. I took the liberty of adding a few things
to it, if you don't mind."
Marie hesitantly looked towards where she knew the
bathroom lay, question in her eyes. Light flickered from
within, a telltale sign of even more candles. She smiled at
him then, trying to hide her nervousness. "No, I don't
mind. Um, I brought a change of clothes, nothing fancy.
I hope it's okay?"
Harry walked towards the bathroom, as if to show her
where it was. "Comfort is the name of the game, Marie.
Just enjoy yourself is all I ask. You need to be babied a
little."
At those words, she felt some of her fear dissipate. She
followed him through the bedroom, purposely averting
her eyes from his bed, then into the bathroom. She
stopped just inside the doorway. There was his bathtub,
filled with steaming, bubble-filled water, flickering
candles the only illumination. "Oh, Harry," she
breathed, inhaling the soft scent of roses. "This is
wonderful. Thank you." Impulsively she hugged him.
Harry placed a strong large hand on Marie's shoulder
and squeezed in a friendly manner. "I just want you to
enjoy it. This whole magick thing has taken a lot out of
you." He pulled out a basket of scented soaps and big
huge bath sponges. Harry looked up and caught her
eye. "You know you have an open invitation to use it
any time you like."
She blushed at that, eyes averted to the tub. "Thank
you, Harry," she finally replied. She set down her bag
and began picking through the basket of soaps and
sponges, searching for ones that she liked.
Harry turned and left the bathroom. She soon heard him,
rustling about the room. A soft clarinet began to
accompany the jazz. Marie smiled, he was practicing for
the goddess knows what. She slipped out of her clothes,
and into the hot water. A loud sigh escaped her lips,
tears welling in her eyes. She needed this, needed this
release. And somehow, knowing that Harry had offered
it made it even more poignant a moment. She knew they
were destined to be together, knew that she felt more
than friendship for the handsome young man. Did he
feel the same way? Leaning back, she rested her head
against the small pillow, eyes closing as she breathed
slow and deep, drinking in the scent of the roses.
Harry continued to play his clarinet. He looked up, and
his breath caught. A long slender arm, and a delightfully
arched nose were outlined by the candles in the
bathroom on the wall. The door had remained open as
the tub was on the far wall and her privacy was assured.
Harry choked and his playing stopped.
Marie heard the clarinet stop playing, but said nothing.
She was far too relaxed to worry about it, and assumed
Harry was done for the time being. She slid down further
into the steamy water and let out a loud, contented sigh.
Harry cleared his throat. Perhaps....he walked over and
picked up a tray of fresh whole strawberries and whipped
cream. "Marie, would you like me to bring you
something to eat? I have some strawberries here." He
called out. Then he wondered how he would get them to
her without invading her space. She was strong on that
too.
She barely heard his voice on the edge of her
consciousness. The hot water and soothing music had
lulled her into a deeply relaxed state. She was nearly
asleep already, and did nothing to fight the fact that she
was about to fall asleep in the man's bathroom.
Concerned with the lack of response, Harry stood closer
to the door to the bathroom. "Marie," his voice filled
with concern. "Are you all right in there?"
She drifted further into the peaceful bliss of oblivion.
Her entire body relaxed into the water, all the stress of
late dissipating into the hot water. She wanted nothing
more than to stay like this forever....and be wrapped in
Harry's arms.
"Marie," Harry peeked around the corner of the door.
He looked down and saw that her eyes were shut. He
walked up to her. The bubbles hiding, what a side of him
so desperately wanted to see. He forced himself not to
think of what kind of state she was in under the soft
foamy blanket. He leaned down, and unconsciously
brushed a wet strand of red hair away from her face.
"Marie, wake up."
Unconsciously, she leaned her face toward his hand,
sighing softly. "Oui, mon amour?" she murmured in her
sleep, nuzzling at the palm of his hand.
Harry's comm badge picked up the french and translated
it. "Yes, my love." His eyes widened in surprise.
"Marie, it isn't safe to fall asleep in the tub." He leaned
even closer to her unconsciously, as he squatted on the
floor by her.
Suddenly, she gasped and sat straight up, waking with a
start. "What? What happened?" she murmured,
blinking several times. She turned to stare at him, found
his concerned face so close, so enticing.... But then
reason returned and Marie realized where she was, what
she was doing.
"Wake up, sleeping beauty. No worries." Harry smiled,
and didn't hint at the deep feelings threatening to push
up from inside of him. He presented a bowl heaped with
red fruit. "I just brought you something to eat."
Suddenly realizing her naked state, she slid back down
into the inviting water, the bubbles concealing her flesh
again. She watched him set the bowl on the edge of the
tub. Carefully, she reached out a hand toward him,
gently touched his cheek in thanks. And the image
popped into her head again. The two of them, wrapped
in each other's arms, each other's love. Nothing would
break
that bond of theirs, short of death they were as one. "Um, thank you,
Harry,"
she replied. As he stood to leave, a sort of panic overwhelmed her.
"Harry? Please stay? Talk to me." At his confused look, she continued.
"I don't
want to be alone right now."
Harry sat on the plush floor mat, and leaned against the wall. He ached
to join her in the tub, but knew that wasn't what she had meant. His
voice rasped with the desire he was fighting, "What would you like to talk
about?"
*Goddess, I want you in this tub with me, holding me close,* she thought.
"I don't care. Just talk to me. Let me know that there's someone here,
so I can rest in peace and safety." She knew she'd fall asleep again at
the soft sound of his voice. He relaxed her, yet awoke all new stresses
in her, stresses she didn't mind.
Harry leaned forward to grab a sponge she was trying to reach. "You are
safe, nothing will happen to you as long as I am around." He said with a
note of humor in his voice. She didn't know how deadly serious he was
when he said that. In the few short weeks since his fortune, he had
rapidly fallen in love with her.
She looked up into his eyes, saw into his soul, saw his sincerity. Tears
welled in her eyes and she reached up to touch his cheek again. She'd seen
it.
He felt as she did. A part of her rejoiced. "Harry, I..."
Harry wordlessly reached up and brushed her soft full lips with the pad of
his thumb. Marie's eyes dilated in response. "Shhhh..." He whispered
huskily.
"No worries, remember. No stress." Marie could see his own eyes dilate
in
response. His intense gaze sent shivers down her spine. He continued.
"I can't have you getting yourself all worked up now, can I? You came
here to relax, so relax." His fingertips trailed up her cheek to brush
away the wet strands of hair that clung to her face. He continued to map
her face with his palm.
Marie reveled in the feel of his hand on her face. She breathed deeply,
his unique scent mixing with the roses in an oddly comforting combination.
She leaned back further in the tub, eyes closing. "You are too good for
me," she murmured, sleep calling her again.
Harry chuckled softly. "Come on, Marie, you can't sleep in the bath. If
you keep your eyes open I will tell you my deepest and darkest secrets."
She was so tired, but the promise of his deepest, darkest secrets called
to her. She cracked open an eye. "Deepest, darkest secrets? Like what?"
She shifted slightly and reached for a strawberry, daintily munching on
it.
Harry leaned back against the wall. "Well..." His voice trailed
suggestively.
"What kind of deep dark secrets would you like to know? Not that I have
a lot
of them mind you." He winked at her.
She couldn't help but smile herself. His good mood was contagious. "I
want to know all of them. Your darkest secrets, your deepest desires...."
Her own voice trailed off seductively. Her eyes locked onto his as she
grabbed for a strawberry and gently bit into it, a bit of the juice
running down her chin.
Harry laughed, and closed his eyes. "My deepest desires, I don't know if
you could handle listening to that given where we both are sitting." He
continued to chuckle.
Her eyes closed and she delicately swiped her tongue along her chin,
picking up the juice. Then she opened her eyes and smiled at him. "Oh,
but there are many things I can handle, Harry. You'd be surprised." She
chuckled, a low throaty sound. "Come on, Harry, tell me."
Harry rose to the challenge. "Well, one of my deepest darkest secrets you
already know, but don't realize it."
She looked at him, curiosity killing her. She wracked her brain, trying
to figure out what he meant, but came up with nothing....unless he
meant.... "I don't understand, Harry. What do I know already?" She
leaned forward again, the bubbles building up around her, shielding her
bare skin from him.
Harry's face filled with mirth. "Well your sitting in my..." he
emphasized the next words, "...my deepest darkest secret. You're using
things, that sometimes I use. I am only missing one piece and I could be
sitting where you are right now." He chuckled as Marie slowly realized
what he was saying.
She smiled slowly, the look lighting up her face. "Well, I never said you
couldn't join me." Her voice was seductive, dangerously low. Suddenly,
she realized what she said...and how she'd said it. A deep blush crept
along her cheeks and she slid back from him. "I -- I'm sorry, Harry, I
didn't mean..."
Then Marie saw a side of Harry that most people didn't know existed. Gone
was the happy boyish figure, and the man came through in his eyes.
"Marie," his voice soft and husky, "My grandmother was Japanese. To the
Japanese, bathing is a great art that is shared." Harry watched Marie's
eyes widen ever so slightly. "If you have no problems with it, I have no
problem getting into that tub with you." He didn't add that he didn't
exactly know if coed bathing beyond the family was part of that tradition.
She stared at him for a moment, debating what to answer.
She knew she wanted him in the tub..but to what end?
The way he was talking...it sounded safe. And right
now, she needed safe. A tentative smile lit her face. "I
have no problems with it, Harry," came her soft reply.
Harry still couldn't fathom the insane, outrageous need
that he had inside of him for this woman. He turned the
lights down lower and asked. "So, Marie, if you could do
anything at all, anything your heart desired what would it
be?" He tried not to think that beneath those very
bubbles her soft naked body would be right up against
his. Marie looked up at Harry, trying to keep her eyes on
the back of his head. "You know what I would want to
do. Right now all I would want to do is be able to safely
fall asleep in this nice hot bath."
***
Seven stepped out of the regeneration alcove. She
couldn't stand it. She began wandering the corridors
of
Voyager and finally found herself outside Sickbay.
With
a slight bit of trepidation, she entered, but found the
facility empty. "Computer, activate EMH."
The hologram appeared. "Please state the
nature...." His
voice trailed off as he saw Seven standing there.
She
looked forlorn, lost, afraid. He longed to take her in
his
arms, comfort her. But she would never accept it.
So he
stood his ground. "Good evening, Seven.":
"Doctor -- David, I must speak with you."
"And I you." He looked at her for a long moment.
"Why don't we go to my office? There's more
privacy
there."
She nodded, began walking toward the small room,
acutely aware of his eyes following her. The feeling
comforted her; but that knowledge frightened her. She
began to pace his office as he came in, closed the door,
opaqued the windows. She couldn't go through another
dream like she'd had. It had terrified her. "Doctor, I
require something to keep these visions away. I do not
wish to have them anymore." Seven's voice was firm in
her resolve, but her body language told a different tale.
She brushed her hair out of her eyes.
It was then that David realized--in his shock of seeing
her--that she had forgone the customary bun, and left her
hair down. He'd forgotten how long her hair was, how
silky it looked in the light. Shaking his head slightly, he
voiced his concern. "What visions are you having,
Seven? Can you tell me about them?" He was curious.
Wondered if she'd seen anything more about him.
Seven turned away from him to stare at the window that
normally gave David a perfect view of all of sickbay. She
didn't want to tell him the nature of the dreams. They
were just far too personal. "I do not wish to talk about
the nature of these dreams David, just merely to inform
you that they are disturbing. I wish for them to be gone.
There is a medicine called..." She continued to ramble off
the scientific names, and things she required.
David stared at her. The drugs she requested were
highly addictive if their use wasn't carefully monitored.
And they had side effects that he couldn't allow his
Seven to suffer through. "I'm sorry, Seven, but I can't
allow you to take those drugs. They will cause you more
problems than your visions." He looked at her sadly.
"I'm sorry, Seven, but I can't do what you ask."
Seven jerked her head around and stared at him directly
in the eye. "You and I both know there is no conclusive
evidence that they will act that way on my Borg modified
body." She desperately did not want to see her
shipmates get hurt over and over again. She didn't want
to experience those awful feelings of need again and
again either.
"I'm sorry, Seven, but I will not allow you to take those
drugs. Borg modifications or no, you are still a human
being. And I know what the effects will be on your
body." He ached to take her in his arms, to comfort her,
make her forget the nightmarish visions. He only wished
he knew what they were.
Seven's eyes tightened in irritation. "I do know what
effects these visions will have on my body. I will not
regenerate until they are gone." She paused then spat
out more. "You are a doctor, your oath requires you help
me."
"My oath requires me to help, not harm," he said
defensively. "I am sorry if your visions are bothering
you. Marie has offered to help you, as have I. Why do
you always resist help?"
Seven caught his eye, "You call talking about my
feelings help? They will only bring up more pain. It is
the pain I want to eliminate." Seven replied
incredulously. Unconsciously she began to rub her
temple, and a moan slipped out from her lips. The soft
moan of pain was unmistakable.
David was instantly at her side at that sound. He took
her in his arms, held her close. "You're going to be
alright, Seven," he murmured.
Afraid of the pleasure and need washing through her
body, Seven pushed him away. "How dare you touch me
without permission!" She jerked backwards in terror. It
seems she was so terrified that her body refused to
move. Then she moaned in pain again, her temples
feeling as if they were on fire.
"Seven!" he hissed. "What is wrong?" He reached for a
tricorder, began scanning her. "Talk to me, Seven!"
Seven's eyes glassed over, as if she was in some far
place. "No," she cried softly. "No, don't do that. It
hurts her can't you see.....Chakotay no. Don't...she isn't
ready to deal with it." Seven's voice, while full of pain,
was much softer than normal. Gone was the Borg
confidence, her voice reflected the woman she had
become.
"Who's not ready to deal with what yet, Seven?" he
asked softly, moving to her side, a gentle hand on her
shoulder. "What do you see, Seven?"
Seven screamed. "No, have to stop him. Hold it a secret
until her heart heals." The glassiness of her eyes
disappeared. "I am sorry, doctor, I have to go." She
went to stand, but David's hand held her firm. She had
Borg strength, but even that wasn't strong enough to
rival a hologram.
"You're going nowhere until you tell me what you saw.
What's going on, Seven?" His eyes bored into hers,
searching for the answers.
"The Captain, she is in danger. I have to tell Chakotay
not to tell her." She fought David like a crazy woman,
attempting to get away from the need, the helplessness,
that his touch made her feel.
At her words, David let go of her arms, shocked at the
thought of the captain in jeopardy. His scientific mind
refusing to believe the power of what she was seeing.
"Seven, what are you talking about?"
"I have to stop him. Please, don't stop me!" she cried,
running out of the room. She ran blindly down the hall,
taunted by visions of Chakotay revealing what he
shouldn't. And then she found him in the turbolift.
"Commander!" Her voice was high, frightened. "Please!
Do not do this!"
***
David hit his comm badge. "The Doctor to Lieutenant
Marie Lacouix. Please come in." Sickbay was filled with
the sound of running bath water.
***
Chakotay looked at Seven. "Do what Seven?" The
puzzlement was clearly written on his face. "I was just on
my way to see the Captain."
"You cannot tell the captain yet, she is NOT ready to
hear it. Her heart hasn't healed yet." She pleaded with
him, with her voice, her eyes, her body. She feared the
results of his disclosure.
Guilt from his choice at the fair, surfaced again. "What
do you mean? Her heart hasn't healed? I thought she
had accepted my choice."
"Acceptance and healing do not go hand in hand,
Commander. You of all people should know that." Her
voice took on an odd tone. There was a look in her eyes
that worried him.
***
Harry finally realized the annoying sound intruding upon
his fantasy was the comm system, paging Marie. He
gently shook her shoulder. "Marie, wake up. The doc's
hailing you."
"EMH to Lieutenant Lacouix. Please respond."
Marie jerked awake. "Lacouix to EMH. What can I do
for you, Doctor?" the water stopped suddenly.
"It's Seven, I think she has been having those psychic
visions. This last one had her in physical pain. Can you
come talk to her?" The Doctor spoke into the silence of
Sickbay.
***
Confused Chakotay probed deeper, "What do you mean
she hasn't healed though? She's not ready to accept that
I love Sam Wildman." He fingered the now empty pocket
that had just recently held a diamond engagement band.
Seven nodded. "She is far from ready, Commander. This
will only hurt her to hear it from you right now."
***
"I'll be there as soon as I can," the EMH heard Marie
say. Then he heard, "Harry, I'm going to need some dry
clothes. Can I borrow something of yours?"
Harry swallowed hard and nodded. Something about
having a woman this beautiful dressing in his clothes
shook him to his core. "Sure, let me get you something."
He pulled himself out of the bath water and roughly dried
off. The white fuzzy towel loosely tied around his lower
half.
Sleepily Marie pulled herself out of the water, and
grabbed for Harry's terry robe. She wrapped it around
her wet form. She leaned her head against the wall and
yawned. A nice soft warm bed sounded a lot better than
dealing with Seven of Nine's newfound powers.
***
Chakotay nodded. Deep in his heart Kathryn Janeway
would always have a special place. He didn't ever want
to hurt her, knowing his actions had caused her to suffer
unnecessarily. He had screwed up in how he had chosen
to deal with his feelings for Samantha. He wouldn't
screw up again, now that he had just asked Sam to marry
him.
"She's agreed to marry you?" Seven suddenly asked
him, eyes narrowing. "You have not been together very
long. How can you be sure marriage is best now?"
***
"Hey, sleepy head," Harry said softly, gently shaking
her shoulder. "Come on, I've put out some clothes for
you."
"Mm-hmm," she murmured, stretching slowly.
"When you're done with Seven, I -- I want you to come
back here, okay?"
Marie found the exhaustion that her body felt. "Yes."
She muttered. She stumbled towards the bed where
Harry had left things for her to change into. She didn't
realize that he was right behind her when she dropped
her robe. She lifted the long shirt and held it to her nose.
She inhaled. This she did for long moments, as if she
was in a distant land.
Harry turned around as not to frighten her. He also
didn't want her to know just how badly she affected him.
"Marie," He said. When she didn't respond, he
continued. "I think I better come with you."
***
Chakotay sighed heavily. "It's not your place to draw
that conclusion, I will trust your judgement on telling the
Captain though." This judgment had to do more with his
insecurities about hurting Kathryn yet again, than
Seven's ability to read people. "Sam and I are ready. We
are in love. Naomi needs a father." He muttered under
his breath.
"The girl is doing fine without a father so far," Seven
said softly. Then she dropped the conversation,
swaying dizzily.
"Seven? Are you alright?" Chakotay was concerned.
***
"Come with me?" she asked, slipping into the shirt.
"Why?" She felt very calm, comfortable in the large, soft
shirt that smelled of Harry. His scent surrounded her,
warmed her throughout.
***
Kathryn awoke slowly to the sound of the door chime.
Carefully, she slipped out of Tuvok's arms, glad he kept
sleeping. She answered the door, yawning, to find Sam
Wildman standing there. A pang of fear cut through her
heart at the sight of Sam's face. "Hello, Samantha. What
can I do for you?" She hoped her voice was steadier
than her heart.
Sam Wildman looked like a woman on the way to the
Guillotine. "I wanted to ask you something, Captain,
something deeply important. I hope I am not disturbing
you." She glanced slightly over to the door that led into
the Captain's sleeping area.
***
Seven crumbled to the ground. Chakotay crouched
down, "Chakotay to sickbay, medical emergency." All
Seven could do was scream.
***
Marie stumbled along the corridor, her tired body
screaming for sleep. She didn't know what was wrong
with her. She had never been this sleepy in all of her life.
She had to get to Seven. Her sleepiness stole from her
sense of urgency. Then she heard Seven's scream.
Marie's eyes flew open, and she took off. The surprised
Harry took off after her.
***
"What would you like to ask, Samantha?" She couldn't
bring herself to call the woman what Chakotay did.
Sam....the connotations it brought when Chakotay said
the name nearly killed Kathryn. She'd been so sure
Chakotay was the one...how could anyone else come
close to him? How could Tuvok?
***
"EMH to Chakotay. What's wrong, Commander?" Then
he heard Seven's screams. "Seven? Seven, what's
wrong?"
"DAVID!!!! MAKE IT STOP!!!" she screamed, doubled
over in pain.
David, shocked that she had called him by name, could
only reply, "I am on my way, Commander."
Marie hunched over Seven. "Look at me," she ordered.
Instinctively Seven looked up. Marie pressed her palm
up to Seven's. "Now concentrate." Seven's eyes shot
directly into hers.
Chakotay didn't know how Marie had so instantaneously
appeared. He was just grateful that she appeared to
know what to do.
"Listen to me, Seven," Marie's soft voice penetrated the
haze of pain. "Will your vision to me, send it to me. I
can handle it, Seven, better than you can." She felt the
younger woman's fear, felt the sincere desire to end the
visions. And then, she saw what Seven saw...and stared
at Chakotay. "Go! Stop Sam from saying anything to the
captain. Now! Before it's too late."
Harry stared at her as she took the sobbing young
woman in her arms, soothing gently.
***
Sam nervously twisted the glittering ring on her finger,
trying to find a way to ask her question. "Um, well, I was -
- I mean, Chakotay and I -- we, uh--" She took a deep
breath. "We've been doing a lot of talking, and we...."
"And you what?" Kathryn asked, not wanting to hear
what the woman would say, but wanting this visit over
with.
***
Chakotay stared at Marie, then ran toward Kathryn's
quarters, praying he'd get there in time. He impatiently
tapped in his access code, nearly knocking Sam over as
he flew in. "Sam, don't say anything!"
***
"I am sorry Captain, I really shouldn't be beating around
the bush." Sam continued.
"Just spit it out." Kathryn replied.
"Chakotay asked me to marry him, and as you're the
Captain..." Sam's voice trailed at Chakotay opened the
door and told her to stop.
The pure pain of betrayal washed over Kathryn's face.
Her eyes widened in shock. She looked down at her feet
and froze. No, this couldn't be happening.
Chakotay ran over to Kathryn. "Kathryn speak to me."
He glanced back at Sam, who also had bent down to see
if the Captain was okay. "We should have waited, she
wasn't ready for this."
Then a voice, more cold than stoic cut through their
concerned words. "I think the logical course of action
would be for you two to leave." Chakotay looked up to
see the tall Vulcan standing in Kathryn's bed room door.
Chakotay almost did a double take. While Tuvok's
demeanor was all stoic Vulcan, his eyes betrayed the lack
of control he had over his emotions at that point. He
watched as Tuvok moved to Kathryn's side, gently set
her on the couch. He could see something there, more
than friendship...as if the fact that the Vulcan had
emerged from Kathryn's bedroom wasn't enough. Clearly
shaken by the sight before him, Chakotay grabbed for
Sam and began toward the door. "I'm sorry, Kathryn.
Perhaps we can discuss this later," he sputtered,
needing more than anything to leave that room, leave the
haunted look in Kathryn's eyes.
Chakotay grabbed Sam's hand and left. Yes, there was
something more than friendship there, but he didn't know
how two sided it was. Kathryn wouldn't explore
relationship possibilities with him, then why would she
explore a relationship with a married man. Chakotay
noticed the look of horror in Sam's face. He tilted her
face up and brushed a kiss across her eyelids. "Don't
worry, everything will be just fine."
***
David picked up the unconscious Seven in his arms.
She had promptly lost
consciousness after transmitting her vision to Marie.
"I think it would be a good idea if she visited me every couple of days
after this. She needs to practice, so this doesn't happen again." Marie,
exhausted by the experience, told him. She had watched Chakotay come out
of Kathryn's quarters. As Harry helped her to stand, she closed her eyes
and concentrated.
***
Tuvok sat next to Kathryn, gently tracing the curve of her cheek.
*Kathryn, listen to me,* he sent across the bond they now shared.
She looked up at him, dazed shock voiding her face of any other emotions.
She wouldn't even allow herself the pain of the betrayal now. "What,
Tuvok?"
Barely heard. Tears threatened to spill down her cheeks.
*You are not alone, Kathryn. I will never leave you.*
"That's what they all say."
And the tears stared anew.
***
Marie felt the captain's shock, Tuvok's worry. And she felt the shocked
hurt from Chakotay. But she couldn't feel pity for Chakotay. He'd made
his own choices. Now he had to live with them. Suddenly, she felt
lightheaded, the force of her exertion overwhelming her. She was grateful
Harry's arms were around her, or she'd have been on the floor in a heap.
Harry glanced at the tired Marie. "Let's get you to bed, and no, you're
not
staying by yourself tonight. Even if I have to sleep on the floor, you're
staying where I can keep an eye on you." Harry's voice laced with the
threat filtered in through the cloudy haze. Marie was unable to respond,
only nod.
Harry picked her up in his arms and walked back to his quarters. Things
would
be back to normal once she got a good night's rest.
***
Never get involved with a married man, even in the most dire of
circumstances.
That's what her mother always told her. Kathryn pulled away from his
touch
even though she wanted nothing more than to stay in it. "How can I
believe that, Tuvok? You're married, and Vulcan marriages are an
institution unto themselves." Kathryn turned away from him, but this
didn't stop him from coming up behind her. His strong arms wrapped her in
a desperate embrace.
"T'Pel will understand. She said as much in her letter to me. I can no
longer feel her." Tuvok turned her in his tight embrace, and placed her
hand upon his cheek. "I can no longer feel her in here. She is gone to
me."
Kathryn stared up at him. "Please don't lie to me, Tuvok. I don't think
I could handle that...not on top of everything else."
Tuvok looked down into her troubled eyes. "I am Vulcan, I am incapable of
lying, as you well know. I say nothing that I do not mean." He paused a
second, looking into her eyes again, reveling in the touch of her mind
against his, however tentative. "Believe me when I say that T'Pel is no
longer a threat to you. She would approve of this, Kathryn. She has
always thought highly of you."
Kathryn began to speak, but Tuvok silenced her with the gentlest, softest
of kisses. It was no more than the barest touch of skin to skin.
Kathryn gasped, her body screamed for more contact. In that second
everything that Tuvok was shot through her mind. His commitment was
foremost. She had been afraid that because he could walk so calmly away
from T'Pel, that he would do the same to her. Kathryn saw his lonely
battle with his emotions, the first day he could not feel his beloved
wife.
Vulcans could be great recluses, but they feared being
alone within their own mind.
"You must sleep, Kathryn. In the morning you will feel
better." He added something with his mind. *Don't build
your wall up again.* Transitions in a relationship were
never easy. It would take time for her to trust him as a
man, but her strong arms around his neck told him that
he had gotten someplace.
Tuvok picked her up in his arms, unwilling to allow her
own feet to carry her to bed. She pulled her face into the
crook of his neck, tears still falling down her face. At the
touch of their bare skin, he knew with certainty that the
Kathryn he loved would survive this. At the touch of
their bare skin, Kathryn knew that at least for tonight she
wouldn't have to be alone.