Olivia wanted to crawl out of her skin knowing Amanda had shut her phone off and they had no clue where she might have gone. She sat in her office, willing her phone to ring with Amanda's voice on the other line, she couldn't bear to think she was scared and upset and out in a city that did no one any good.

"Fin! Have you got anything? It's been over an hour. No one has heard from her yet?" Olivia asked, hollering into the squad room where Fin and the rest of the team had been working on finding Amanda.

"I'm sorry Liv, her phone is still off. My offer to check a few places I know she goes still stands."

"No, no I want you to stay here, I'll go. I can't sit here waiting anymore." Olivia walked back to her desk to gather a few belongings; keys, phone, coat. "I'll let you know if I find anything."

"Liv wait."

"What is it?" she stopped mid stride.

"Her phone just came back online."

Twenty minutes of driving through evening Manhattan traffic, Olivia finally arrived at the bar where Amanda's phone was pinging. Admittedly, she was nervous. Just a couple of hours ago Amanda was yelling at her in her office, storming out and ignoring anyone who tried to talk to her. She was afraid of what version of Amanda she would find inside the bar.

It didn't take long to spot the blonde woman sitting at a booth in the corner, head bowed, hair blocking the view to get face, but Olivia was almost certain there were tears. She could recognize the defeat in Amanda that she once felt.

As she approached the booth, Amanda didn't look up, didn't acknowledge Olivia, didn't move at all, so slowly, Olivia slid into the seat next to her. There was a glass of whiskey spring in front of Amanda, the ice was melted, and it looked to be untouched. Amanda's hands rested on the table in fists so tight her knuckles we're white and there was blood seeping onto the table from the force her nails were dug into her palms.

"Amanda? Sweetie?" Olivia attempted to get her attention without touching her for fear she might have a negative reaction, but her soft words weren't putting a crack in Amanda's armor. "Amanda? Amanda, I need you to unclench your hands sweetie. Look at me. Amanda, look at me." After a long moment Amanda turned slowly and locked eyes with Olivia, but she didn't say a word and she didn't unclench her hands. "I know you're angry, and upset, and probably afraid but right now you're safe. I'm here, and you're safe. I need you to unclench your hands for me Amanda."

With a slow nod, Amanda slowly released the pressure on her palms, allowing more blood to flow freely. Olivia reached over and grabbed napkins and firmly pressed them into Amanda's palms, doing her best to slow the bleeding.

As she pressed the napkins to Amanda's palms, she couldn't help but realize how shady of a place she found herself in. In her hurry to get to Amanda she had missed all the looks and unsavory people she had passed on her way to the booth.

"Amanda, I'm not trying to hurry you or anything, you don't need to say anything, but I think it would be a good idea if we went somewhere else." She knew this was out of character for herself, she felt as if she was rushing, but she didn't feel comfortable in this hole in the wall bar full of people who all seemed to be able to smell the cop on her. By the looks they we're giving, they had worn out their welcome the moment she walked through the door. Amanda simply nodded and stood from her seat and followed Olivia out of the booth. With her hand resting on the blondes lower back, Olivia led the two of them from the bar and to get car across the street. It was raining, actually pouring as if there was a faucet right about them.

After pulling into traffic, Olivia turned and looked at Amanda sitting next to her who was looking down at the blood soaked napkins in her hands, no longer doing any good to stop the blood from dripping. The rain had soaked through both of their clothes, though Amanda seemed unfazed by any of it.

"We'll get to my apartment faster, I need to get your hands bandaged and cleaned." Olivia said, worried even more about Amanda than she was before she'd found her. The woman who usually always had something to say was now communicating with nods. She turned on the heat and continued heading in the direction of her apartment.