Fall
Two: Wounds
A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed! You guys rock my socks!
I still don't own AIW, but having Johnny Depp in my wardrobe is a bonus :D (Jealous, much?)
Tarrant vaguely felt Mirana and Mc Twisp pulling him from his knees, where he was by Alice's side.
The battle had been over hours ago. The Red Queen, the Jabberwock, her army and Stayne were gone…but Tarrant couldn't move.
He couldn't leave her.
Mirana, was still in tears after the results of the battle and watching silent tears race down her friend's lonely expression was only making her feel worse.
She pulled him up to his feet.
Tarrant brushed her off once he was standing, keeping his eyes on Alice.
"Tarrant, come on," Mirana whispered.
"Alice…"He mumbled down at the body, he'd been holding in his arms.
"Was amazingly good to us, now let's go!" Said the rabbit getting shifty around the dead body, already.
Mirana put an arm over Tarrant's shoulder and began to lead him away.
He shrugged off the arm and bent down. Mc Twisp wanted to question what he was doing, but knew better than to disturb him.
The Hatter took off his hat and picked up Alice in his arms, while still holding his hat. He felt his lip quiver from the pain inside when Alice's cold, dead hand brushed against his.
He couldn't feel the bloody wounds he'd been left with…well, not the wounds on his flesh at least. The wound in his heart was aching, and refusing to subside.
Mc Twisp and Mirana rode on her horse by the broken man's side as he carried Alice to Marmoreal to be rested.
Tarrant wasn't really sure how long it took…he didn't mind really, the long walk just meant that he could hold her in his arms for that much longer.
He looked down on her, her eyes were closed from when he'd flicked them shut, closing the windows on a life that'd been so short, the life of the person that'd been the only one to trip him up from this disaster and reach in and tap into his soul…only to break his heart.
She looked so peaceful…almost as if she was only sleeping, just an angel in his arms, an angel, that only needed her wings to be fixed before she would flex them out again and fly before him.
He longed to shake her, scream at her and tell her to wake up. He longed to watch her sleepily open her eyes, smile that beautiful smile and reach out for his hand…but she didn't.
She just laid there in his arms, dead….gone.
They reached Marmoreal at sunrise. Everything turned to a blur, someone took Alice from his arms, and then someone led him to a bowl of soup. He didn't eat. Sometime after that, someone…Thackery probably, led him to a bed room, where he'd been sitting in a blue and white armchair with an untouched pot of tea in front of him, ever since.
He only started to react when a squeaking noise disrupted him from the nightmarish memory that plagued his brain.
"'atter!"Squealed Mallymkun.
"Mally?" He looked down.
"Hatter…" She repeated and frowned at him.
He gave her a questioning look.
"Get up!" She prodded him with her sword, "Everyone's getting healed. You're hurt."
"Hurt," He played the word around in his mind…trying to remember a time when he'd been hurt like this.
He let himself follow the dormouse out to the gardens where hundreds of soldiers and supporters where laying wounded, some covered in blood, some only with bruises, each of them scarred inside…but none as much as Tarrant.
He was told to sit on a white chair under a gazebo where at least ten other people were being treated for various injuries.
One of Mirana's followers took off his bow tie, peeled his shredded jacket from his arms and took off his blood stained shirt. He flinched as she applied a cool, cream, which spelt suspiciously like something fashioned from oak root and llama ear wax, raven feathers and chalk dust, onto the cut on his neck.
"Tarrant Hightopp? Yes?" She asked in a cool but friendly voice as she layered the cream on his neck.
"Yes…."He muttered.
"That Alice…what a hero, I hear she was quite close to you…poor girl…" She began to use a different cream, this one was made from peppermint earwigs, a dead dragon's conscience, midday sunflowers and what smelt like enchanted birch tree leaves.
"Yes, close, Alice, girl," He replied, twitching a little when the woman began to rub the ointment into the slit in his arm.
"I'm Ivory," She looked at him through hazel eyes.
He looked at her frown when she went to put cream on his side wound.
"Hmmm….come, here and lay down so we can look at this," She pulled back a strand of hair. Her hair wasn't exactly white like all of the white queen's court, but more of a light clean, blonde, it was long, straight and currently tied up in a braid.
Tarrant let the woman lay him down on a stretcher. While she left to get something he was left to his own mind, again.
He closed his eyes. There she was again, falling…that scream…ringing out through his ears. Then the thud, as she hit the ground, still the scream ran through his ears, tormenting him.
He could take it no more.
He opened his eyes.
Ivory walked over to him, holding a pitcher of water and a cloth.
"We need to clean this up before we treat it, Tarrant," She knelt next to him and examined the gash in his snow white torso, near his ribs.
Tarrant cried out in pain when she rubbed away the dark, dried blood with the cloth, revealing a deep wound of fleshy pink, which contrasted against the powdery colour of his toned chest and stomach.
He felt nothing as Ivory began to rub the cream into the wound; no pain came from the dangerous, all the pain that overwhelmed him stemmed from the screaming. The dark hands tugging at his mind were a product of the death of the girl who was destined to save Underland, destined to save him.
Ivory seemed to look sorry for the hatter, "It hurts doesn't it? When someone you care for dies…you'll be okay, eventually."
Tarrant ignored her and let himself fall back into the depth off his memories.
The young woman wound a soft bandage around his stomach. She handed him his shirt and jacket, he slipped the shirt back on, sat up and cradled the jacket in silence.
"Go," He hissed at her when she didn't leave.
She nodded, nervously and scuttled off.
Slowly the people around him dispersed, to their homes or to the castle for rest and to honour the dead…by dusk he was the only one, left.
Propped up on one elbow he watched the sun set and he looked down at the jacket in his hands. He examined the torn sleeve silently. He reached to the pocket and pulled out a needle and thread. He made a stitch in the tear. He unpicked the stitch and folded the jacket back up.
He broke the needle in half and threw it to the ground. He choked on pain and tears as he flopped back down onto the bed, "This wasn't meant to happen…I wanted to be with her forever…I was going to ask her for her hand…why did she leave me?" He whispered out to the darkness.
"She had to do what all must when the reaper calls, you know that Tarrant," A voice whispered in his ear.
Hatter looked around. Am I hearing voices? Well, it wouldn't surprise me…
Then he saw it. A brilliant blue butterfly hovering before him. He had to take a minute for it to register but he knew who it was, "Absolem!" He frowned.
"Tsk, tsk, tsk, Tarrant, Alice was a wonderful girl but you're fine without her." Absolem reasoned, firmly.
Deep down, Tarrant knew that Absolem was only trying to help but something got the better of him and he yelled, "Why would you speak of Alice that way? How could you say that of someone who gave her life trying to save yours?You know nothing of my pain…NOTHING! NOTHING!" His breath was shaky and he could feel the tears pressing on his eyes.
Without another word, the butterfly flitted off, leaving Tarrant to cry in silence with the shadows.
The tears flowed slowly at first, steady like the drip of water from a funnel.
Tarrant didn't cry much, when horrible things happened he tried to block them out.
He'd spent what felt like forever building a high wall around himself…a wall which he'd never lowered…or tried not to, except for his closet friends…and yet, Alice had managed to get through the wall…of course she had….
Now as he laid crying, hoarsely into his jacket, the walls were down, he didn't think he'd ever be able to rebuild them…SHE'D turned them into a crumbled mess.
He screamed out her name, letting out the howling ghosts within, the ones that were still calling for him.
His scream turned back to tears…the tears slowed down…and eventually eased off.
He wiped his blurred green eyes and got up.
He pulled his old jacket back on and half-heartedly tied the bow around his neck back up.
He cursed at the pain underneath the bandage…the injuries that Stayne had left him with hurt badly…but his beautiful; Alice dying hurt him and cut him deeper than any sword ever could.
He slowly walked back to the White Queen's castle, and found himself in 'his' room. He never slept well but he was tired.
The hatter took off his shoes and socks and the bow he'd only just tied. He laid his jacket on the white armchair and took off his shirt.
He folded back the creamy covers of the bed and laid down.
He stared into the ceiling…he couldn't sleep.
Sometime, he fell asleep.
"Hatter!" She laughed wrapping her arms around his neck.
"Alice," He grinned back at her, pulling her against him.
She rested her head on his shoulder and he rocked her to and fro, both of them were still high on the ecstasy of one another.
She looked up at him, her eyes locked into his.
With a giggle she took his hat off.
"Alice Kingsleigh…"He played with the name and allowed his hand to run up and down her back, managing to pull her closer than she already was.
Her mouth turned to a smile as she leaned up a little and locked her lips into his.
He tilted his head back slightly, in happiness, when he heard a soft moan escape her mouth as he took her face in his hands and kissed her back, passionately.
"Tarrant…"She mumbled into his lips.
He gently bit her bottom lip and ran his tongue over the top one, playfully.
They them eventually broke off the amazing kiss. One side of the Hatter's mouth turned up into a loving, even sexy smile.
Alice rested her head against his chest, "Promise, me, that it'll stay like this forever…"
Tarrant stroked her yellow hair and tilted her face up, "It'll stay like this forever," He confirmed then softly kissed her lips again.
He woke up, sweating, blankets twisted around him, the image of Alice taking off his hat, the image of her kissing him…that kiss…it'd seemed so real…those images flew around in his mind.
Tarrant screamed as he realised that it'd all been a dream.
He bit down on his lip and tasted blood.
The wounds that he'd earned in battle would heal in a matter of weeks, months maybe…but the wound SHE'D given him…would take a life time.
It takes a lifetime to heal over a massive hole in your heart, when the hole is an abyss of lost love.
It takes a lifetime to forget when the memories are all you have.
It takes a lifetime to accept when SHE WAS your life, your hope, your world; your future….everything you ever wanted was her….and now you must accept that she's gone.
A/N: Thank you! :D I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter because I enjoyed writing it! Please review, I really love and appreciate anything you have to say so please take the 30 seconds to share your opinion : )