Chapter Track: Good Ol' Fashion Nightmare – Matt & Kim
Edd's phone goes off beside him. A text from Kevin flashes across the screen.
Another text, to be more accurate. Edd's been ignoring him for the better part of an hour, trying to get his AP Music Theory homework finished before he bothers to reply. It's been two days since Kevin forced his way into Edd's house and kissed him, subsequently proposing that they have a thing in the meantime.
With a sigh, Edd leans back into his chair and opens his phone.
can u hang tonite
answer me dork
i can fuckin see u thru ur window quit ignoring me bitch
Edd rolls his eyes and sets his phone aside. He stands and stares out his window at Kevin's house. Though he doesn't see Kevin, he knows that somehow, Kevin can see him. So he opens his window, sticks his middle finger out of it, and closes the window again before flipping his shutters closed.
His phone vibrates again. Edd picks it up – call it morbid curiosity.
ur pissin me off
Edd types out a quick response.
As soon as you stop calling me names, I will consider it.
A few minutes pass, long enough that Edd can finish what he has up on his laptop and exit out of the program. He stands and stretches, popping his neck. Instead of his phone going off another time when he slides his feet into his slippers, the doorbell rings.
On his stoop stands Kevin, of course, when he opens the door. It's a brisk night, and he wears a leather jacket to stave off the cold. Edd ushers him in and closes the door, leaning against it with a sigh.
Kevin runs his fingers through his hair and asks, "So uh, how do you wanna do this thing?"
"Please take off your shoes and put them here," Edd says and gestures to the rack by the door, "I'll take your coat." Kevin shrugs off the leather jacket and hands it to Edd, who hangs it in the front room closet.
"Would you care for a cup of tea?" asks Edd, "We have oolong, Earl Grey, English Breakfast, some herbal blends…"
"I'm good, but thanks," Kevin says, and holds up a hand.
"All right," Edd says, "I suppose we'd better go upstairs, then." He's nervous, like he knew he would be, but at least the nerves are combined with a streak of anger at Kevin's constant pestering and his infuriatingly handsome face – although the expression on that face is less than encouraging.
"I told you that you could end our arrangement if you wanted," Edd says, and lifts a brow at him.
Kevin gives a shaky laugh, "Nah, I want to do this thing, I've just never done anything like this before? So I'm nervous I guess."
"You've already done the beginning part," Edd tells him. He opens his bedroom door and bids Kevin come in as soon as he's surveyed him to see if his socks are clean enough to walk on the white carpet, "You know, the kissing part."
Kevin isn't paying attention to him, though. He's staring at Edd's shelf of jarred specimens. He points to Edd's favorite, the biggest jar on the shelf. Kevin turns, brows raised, "The fuck is that, Edd?"
"A cycloptic piglet in a jar," Edd answers, "And before you ask, that one's a bat, that one's a rhinoceros beetle and that's a double-bodied chicken."
"Sick," Kevin says, in such a tone that Edd doesn't know if he's fascinated or disgusted, or perhaps a bit of both.
"If you insult my pig, I'm not going to let you kiss me," Edd says, and crosses his arms, "Her name is Daffodil."
"I was gonna say she's cool, but okay," Kevin shrugs, "I mean, really fucking weird, but cool."
For one reason or another, the cycloptic piglet in a jar seems to have diffused the tension between them. Kevin takes a single step forward and reaches out to touch his fingertips to Edd's arm, urging him a little closer. Edd follows. Kevin smells like cigarettes again, but like breath mints and that cologne again. It's nice.
Nice enough that Edd leans the short distance down to Kevin's lips, presses their mouths to each other. Kevin is still against him for a long moment, limbs awkward and touch scared. When he pulls back, he says, "That wasn't so bad."
Edd agrees, "It was all right."
"All right?" Kevin scowls, "I'm a great kisser."
"Do women tell you that because you're handsome, or because there's actual truth to it?" asks Edd. It isn't that Kevin is a bad kisser, per se, just that he could use some practice. Edd hasn't kissed too many people, but he's kissed enough to know what a good kiss is.
The frown on Kevin's face deepens as he considers this. He says, "I dunno, man. What am I doing wrong?"
"From my experience," Edd begins, "You've either been forceful, or unresponsive. Of course, this is based upon a mere two kisses, which is hardly enough data to –"
Kevin swoops forward and smashes their lips together again. He pulls Edd into it, gripping him by the waist, and licks along Edd's lower lip. Edd's lips part and he lets out a soft huff of breath before allowing Kevin to press his tongue into his mouth. Edd has always been cautious about open-mouthed kissing. One never knows what it can cause – but he doesn't think of that now. He can only think of how warm Kevin's hands are, or how insistent his tongue. His senses are pushed into overdrive, and he loops his arms around Kevin's neck just so he can press their bodies closer.
When they break to breathe, Kevin demands, "That good enough for you?"
"Much better," Edd agrees.
Kevin threads his fingers through his hair and remarks, "Man, I just kissed a dude."
"You're a regular Sherlock, aren't you?" Edd wryly asks.
Kevin elbows him. His face turns a little pink and he says, "Fuck off, Double Dork."
"Your originality in name-calling never ceases to amaze," Edd comments, "Is that all? You look a little green."
"Yeah, I think – um, I guess that's good for now," Kevin says.
"All right," Edd opens his bedroom door and waves Kevin out, "If that's all, have a nice night, Kevin. I'm certain I'll see you tomorrow in gym class."
"Wait," Kevin says, "Do you wanna like, chill or something?"
"We're not friends," Edd reminds him, "I told you that before. We don't 'chill' or 'hang out.' I agreed to assist you in becoming comfortable with your dual sexuality, not in 'chilling.'"
"Okay, Christ, I'll go," Kevin says.
They walk together downstairs, where Kevin replaces his work boots on his feet, and Edd retrieves his leather jacket from the closet. A moment of awkward silence passes in which they both stare at each other. Kevin is still red in the face, emphasizing the smattering of freckles on his nose and apples of his cheeks. It would be endearing if the freckles weren't on a face that belonged to an obnoxious, closeted bully.
"Why don't you go out the back?" Edd suggests, breaking the quiet, "Just in case."
"Good thinking," Kevin says.
At the back door, Kevin pauses, as though meaning to say something. But he doesn't – he steps outside, gives a half-hearted wave, and jogs out into Edd's backyard. Edd listens for the creak of the gate swinging shut and closes the sliding glass door. He locks it behind him, closes the curtain, and settles down to read – putting the night's events out of sight and out of mind.
xxx
Kevin crosses Double D's backyard and then the street. He makes a pointed effort to avoid the street lamps, walking instead across front lawns in the dark. He slips into his house. His dad is on the couch in the living room, a Coors in his hand and the TV on in the dark, some reality show with the contestants yelling at each other.
Kevin slinks to the fridge and pulls out a beer of his own, lifting it so his dad can see, and asks, "Can I have one of these?"
"Go for it, kid," his dad says, and takes a sip from the can in his grip.
Kevin takes the beer up to his bedroom, where he sinks into his desk chair with a long exhale.
"What am I doing?" he mutters, but he doesn't know the answer.
But then, maybe this has been a long time coming. He first noticed that maybe he wasn't exactly straight years ago, at the beginning of junior high. Sometimes the way that certain boys would touch him – just a hand to the shoulder, or brushing past each other on the way to class – would make him feel the exact same way certain girls would. His throat would get itchy and his body would tingle. Except with boys, he felt bad about it. He didn't like it, because he knew other people didn't like it.
Double D isn't like that. He doesn't give a shit if other people like him. Maybe that's why Kevin doesn't mind him so much – and likes him, just a little. Because he sure as hell can't do what Edd can. Edd wears his weirdness as a badge of honor, and Kevin…Kevin can't stand the things about him that might make people not like him. He's an image person, and he doesn't like that he is. But no matter how hard he tries, he can't put the importance of being liked out of his head.
He thinks some of his friends would be fine. Maybe. Nazz wouldn't care, he knows. Nazz is good people, though. He can't count on that with the guys on the football team, or his baseball friends, or even the friends he's collected at biking competitions over the years. He cares about his friends, but he knows they're not comfortable with dudes that like dudes.
God, what is he doing?
Edd…is not who he expected to be doing this with, at least not the person he would have thought of when Kevin first noticed that he might be into guys. Edd is awkward and uses big words that he can't understand, and has a fucking piglet in a jar in his room that he named Daffodil.
Kevin cracks open the beer and takes a sip before standing. He crosses his room to his window, and peeks out from behind his metal blinds. Edd still has his shutters closed. Figures. He probably shouldn't have said anything about being able to see Edd through his window.
That dude. How can somebody be so damn smart and so oblivious at the same time? Double D has had his shutters open for like months now, and Kevin has watched him dress and undress on more than one occasion.
Kinda creepy, but he takes what he can get.
Of course, now he has this thing they're doing.
Man, that was a nice kiss. Kevin doesn't tend to linger on kisses. He's always been a fan of getting to the good stuff, but boys make him more nervous than girls ever have. He's not afraid of doing something wrong with girls, and never really has been – even when he lost his virginity, he was pretty sure he was doing okay, considering the circumstances.
But this is different. He doesn't know why. It shouldn't be different, probably. But it is. Edd is smart and weird and has a nice smile when it can be teased out of him. The dude doesn't smile a lot.
And why doesn't Edd want to be friends with him, huh? What's up with that? People love being friends with him. Kevin knows it. He's fun to be around. He is a fun person. But Double D doesn't give a shit.
This is confusing.
Kevin finishes off his beer before shedding his jacket onto the floor, and kicking his boots off to the side of his room, where they hit his wall with a clunk clunk. He crosses the hall to the bathroom and strips down.
For a second, he glances at himself in the mirror. He's a decent-looking dude. This isn't a raw deal for Edd. Sure, he's got these stupid freckles and a collection of scars from various sports-related injuries (and times he should have gotten stitches but didn't), but he's pretty easy on the eyes.
If Kevin were another guy that liked guys, he'd be over the damn moon about being friends with him. But Double D doesn't care, and that pisses him off.
Kevin steps into the shower and turns it on, wincing at the initial blast of cold before the water warms up. He lathers up and leans against the tile for a second. The suds slip down his arms, over tan skin and down his abs, whose definition he is just a little proud of.
He wonders what Edd looks like in the shower. That kid is so secretive about what's under his clothes, and Kevin can't say that he gets it. Edd's a good-looking dude. Kevin wouldn't be inclined to kiss if he wasn't. And sure, Kevin's seen some of the merchandise through Edd's window when Edd didn't know anybody was looking, but never anything close up. As far as Kevin can tell, he's lean and sort of pretty-looking. And he might have a nice ass, but Kevin only got one distant flash, one time.
Goddamnit.
He's hard now, thinking like that. That's what he gets for getting carried away.
Kevin gnaws on his lip. When the copper taste of blood touches his tongue, he makes an executive decision to give in and take care of the thing. He wraps his hand around himself and leans into his touch. He makes sure to be quiet, but he thinks of Edd. He's kind of been doing that a lot lately. He thinks of them both, actually. He thinks of Edd's bed, and them being in it. He thinks of Edd completely naked underneath him. They're not doing anything but kissing, really. But Edd tastes good.
Edd tasted good back in his bedroom. He tasted clean, and like mouthwash. But there was something else about the way he tasted, something just so good.
Kevin's mind drifts, and he imagines that it's not his hand on his cock, but Edd's. Yeah. That's nice.
In only a handful of minutes, he comes onto the shower wall with a sharp intake of breath.
The shower was supposed to get his mind off everything, but now he's just stuck on it.
Kevin cleans his come off the tile and rinses himself off. He shuts down the water and steps out onto the bath mat, where he towels himself dry. His skin is pink from the hot water, and his face red from what he'd done in it.
He doesn't bother with homework when he returns to his room. He slides boxers onto his hips and collapses onto his bed. Exhaustion settles in. He worked too hard at practice today, and his limbs are heavy and sore. But his mind is exhausted, and so are his insides. He's been thinking and feeling too many things and it would be a relief to just –
Fall asleep.
xxx
The alarm clock screams Kevin awake at six in the morning. He slams his hand down on it and rolls onto his back with a loud groan. He rubs the crust off of his eyes. For a few minutes, he just stares at his ceiling, tired and a little angry. He didn't sleep well, tossing and turning all night, getting up to go to the bathroom, playing Angry Birds at three in the morning until his eyes were too tired to stay open.
He's a fucking mess.
Kevin dresses in his standard t-shirt, and jeans that he wore holes in the knees of from falling off of his bike one too many times. He ties sneakers onto his feet and shucks his letterman jacket over the ensemble. In the mirror, he looks more put-together than he feels.
It's a gray day outside, and a little cold even with his jacket zipped. The trees are all red and gold and brown, and some even already bare with their leaves on the ground at their roots. Winter is gonna be here soon…Kevin is not a winter person. He likes being able to be outside in the sun, with a football or on his wheels, or with a bat in his hands.
Kevin mounts his bike and starts toward the school. Ahead of him, he sees Double D, who's focused on a book in his hands.
Kevin slows to a stop next to him and says, "Hey."
Edd glances up and frowns at Kevin like he usually does. He says, "You are remarkably terrible at following instructions."
"What? Come on," Kevin says, and lowers his voice to suggest "Let's go make out before school."
"No!" Edd exclaims, "Somebody will see."
"Not if we go in those trees over there," Kevin says, pointing to the entrance to the park, "C'mon."
Edd lifts a brow. Kevin thinks he's about to get shot down, but instead, Edd says, "Fine. But only for a moment."
"Sweet," Kevin says. He hops off of his bike and follows Edd through the grass and into the trees.
Edd folds his arms over his chest and says, "Well?"
Kevin licks his lips and backs Edd up against a tree. He leans into him and kisses him. It comes more easily now already. Edd tastes that same kind of nice – which makes Kevin thankful that he remembered to brush his teeth this morning. He licks into Edd's mouth and exhales through his nostrils.
Edd's hands reach out to touch his waist. He pulls Kevin forward by his belt loops, and presses their bodies together. Kevin has to break the kiss to gasp.
"Shit, dork," Kevin says, and smiles goofily at him.
Edd doesn't smile back. He lets go of Kevin and slides out from between his arms. He brushes a yellow leaf off of his t-shirt and says, "All right, that's quite enough for now, I think. I'll leave first."
And Edd leaves, just like that.
God, what is with that guy?
Kevin waits a handful of minutes before he walks his bike back out to the sidewalk and pedals to the school, where he chains the old girl up to one of the racks out front.
Once inside, he spots Nazz and gives her a one-armed hug.
"Hey, what's up?" he asks.
"Same old," she shrugs, "What's with you? You look like shit, Kev."
"Couldn't sleep for shit last night," he replies, "You got that worksheet we had to do for Jamesson? I kind of didn't do it."
Nazz rolls her eyes and pulls her backpack off her shoulders. She pulls the sheet out of a folder decorated with puppy stickers and hands over the homework they were supposed to do for Biology. She says, "Give it back before class, okay? And you owe me, buddy."
"Yeah, yeah," he says.
Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Edd.
He's wearing a pair of goggles on top of his head.
"How does he do that?" Kevin says out loud.
Nazz turns around, "Double D? Do what?"
"Not care," he says, "about what people think. Like, that's weird. He's got goggles on his head. But he doesn't give a shit. I don't get it."
Nazz looks back to Kevin and cocks a brow. She replies, "I dunno, but you have the opposite problem, don't you?"
"Yeah," sighs Kevin, and heads toward his locker.
xxx
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