Summary: In which Katsuski skips the first stage of grief and jumps right into the second.
The sun was bright, sending rays of golden light down upon the bustling city as it began its decline in the sky. Fluffy clouds listlessly floated across a deep blue sky. A gentle breeze carries soft pink petals that twist and dance in the air.
Everything was perfect. Beautiful.
Katsuki fucking hates it all.
He's walking. He doesn't know where to. Not that he fucking cares anyway. He just needs to move, to do something besides sit in that small dismal house full of all those fucking pretenders and their fake tears and stupid ass dramatics.
None of them actually care about fucking quirkless Deku. He knows they don't because when he was alive none of them even knew he fucking existed.
Stupid Deku. Stupid fucking Deku. Such a useless piece of shit. Couldn't even save himself from a fucking lame sludge creep. Hell to that slimy fuck-ass too. Katsuki hopes the creep rots in the pits of hell forever. He and Deku are at fault for this. But Katsuki doesn't know the villain. He does know Deku, though. So most of his rage is directed at the worthless shit went and got himself killed, leaving his mom to break into a thousand pieces.
And that's another reason he can't fucking stand that place one more minute. Oba-san won't stop crying. Tears fill her eyes and fall down her cheeks like a waterfall. But she doesn't make a sound. She is trying to hold it in, to play host for all of those shitty pretenders. And she's doing it. She's pretending to not be broken as shit inside and holding herself together despite how completely shattered she is. Stupid lady is even smiling.
His mom is back there too. He's never seen the bitch so subdued.
Worthless Deku. Who does he think he is causing Oba-san and his mom so much pain?
If he had just had a quirk- even if it was something stupid like the quirks of all the extras. But he didn't. Useless Deku was just that. Useless. He wasn't even as stupid as the extras with their worthless quirks. He was lower than worthless.
And now he is dead.
A shadow falls across his face and Katsuki looks up to see a bridge. His body freezes as he realises where his feet had taken him.
This is where Deku died.
They were friends once, before his quirk presented itself. Deku was weak even then, soft and small and way too fragile. But he wasn't an extra like the others. Deku kept challenging him. He wanted to be as great a hero as Katsuki. He wanted to have as cool a quirk as Katsuki. He wanted to be as strong as Katsuki.
And he had the guts to back it up too- even if he did stutter and cry a lot like a fucking wimp. But Oba-san cries too and Katsuki would never trick himself into thinking she was weak. His mom is scarier, but only by a little.
That is why they were friends. Because Deku wasn't like all the other extras who just wandered listlessly through life. He was actually going places just like Katsuki, to become more than just the drivil of lame meat bags filling society. He had drive and determination.
Then they all found out Deku wasn't ever going to get a quirk. All of Deku's courage, determination, guts. It suddenly meant nothing. Because he was nothing.
But that is not right. Yeah he was fucking worthless and useless. But Katuski now sees that he was something even without a quirk. He was alive.
And now he's not.
Heat is building up in his palms and Katsuki feels himself shaking with rage.
"AAAAAAAAAAAH!" Katsuki screams, right fist flying forward and slamming into the wall of the underpass. Explosions crack and popple from his palm and fire and light burst forth with his furry. The release feels good. But it's not enough.
Katsuki doesn't know how long he punches the mortar. It's dark by the time he makes his way back home. His skin has split around the knuckles, the joints of his hand hurt, and his muscles of his arm burn. The smell of smoke, nitroglycerin, and sweat clings to him like fucking leaches to tender flesh.
Under the bridge there is a dark ash staining a cracked and crumbling wall.
Uuuuugh… Writing down Katsuki's rather colourful vocabulary was sooooo hard.
You'll probably laugh, but I just gotta say that I am not someone who swears- EVER. The closest thing I get to swearing is 'darn it' (I know you're all rolling your eyes at me!).
So saying or writing curse words is painful to me because it's just so vulgar and makes me want to wash my mind out with soap!... Which has proven rather impossible. Ugh.
But Katsuki isn't Katsuki without some (a LOT of) swearing. So your all welcome.