Chapter 2: Bella's POV
I walked to the nearest tree trunk and knelt down in front of it scrunching my knees closer to me, as if that was the only thing I had left. As if.
I still had Edward. Edward, my life, my hope, my dream, and my future. The first person I think of when I think of love. The first person that comes to mind when I think of safety. And now, because of safety, I'm forced to keep away from him.
Why did this stupid Volturi come after me? The only reasonable thing to do now was for me to change into a vampire, soon or sooner.
Just then, Edward came out the door in normal human pace closing the door lightly behind him, and walked up to me with a look on his face. I couldn't really decipher what he was thinking. He was the mind reader after all.
"Bella," he sighed. His voice tough, like the black in his eyes. He hadn't known this either. I knew he couldn't agree with them, but with prior experience, it was hard not to expect the unexpected. "I don't want to be away from you. But—," I interrupted before he could finish his oh so famous speech.
"BUT BECAUSE OF MY SAFETY, YOU HAVE TO DO IT! I'M TIRED OF THIS! I've already been away from you too long! I thought you loved me, if you love me; can't you just risk some things? Oh, I don't know, maybe leaving me?! Because I need you, Edward! I need you like you need me!" I screamed my head off that I felt light headed. There was meant to be anger in my voice, but it was smoldered by pain. I was trembling all over, conscious of the look in Edward's eyes. Tears were on the brink of my wide eyes and my hand clutched my heart.
"Bella, we have no choice. Yes, we can die together," I flinched at the word. He did too. "Or we can just be separated for a little while with lots of contacts, and then be back together," he said. When he put it like that, it was easy to pick. But I needed to restore my thoughts, recast the painful memories I had going into depression because Edward wasn't there. Finally, I lost it. The tears flowed down my cheeks and I didn't bother wiping them off.
In a flash, Edward was behind me wrapping his arms around my waist except for one hand that was wiping the tears for me. I stayed very still, thinking of my choices. I didn't have a buffet.
"Bella," he whispered into my hair as he kissed it afterward. "I know it's hard. But it's the price to pay for loving a monster. I'm sorry," he said quietly as his arms slipped from my waist. I didn't want him to let me go. His hands were on my waist and he turned me around slowly so I was facing him, er, I mean, his shoulders. I looked up.
"You're far from a monster, Edward. And, and…," I helplessly choked on some tears. "I love you so much. I don't want to…be left alone ever again," I ended weakly. There was no more to say.
"Me too, Bella. But do you think I would be happy if you were hurt, because of me?" he retaliated. That was true…of course, except for one other.
"Edward. Bite. Me. Now." I demanded. His presence before me surely inebriated me enough for me to gain my attitude. He wasn't buying it.
"Bella, why do you have to do this? I'm happy the way you are," he said sighing. We had gone through this more often since he wanted to marry me. We had agreed on him changing me after we married and had our honeymoon. But that seemed superfluous. The idea of marriage at age 18 seemed like an idea flying away from my grasp.
"Because, that's the only way we can live together without being separated not even once," I said solemnly. It was true, except for some flaws of course…
"They will still want us to join anyway. And I would rather you not lose your soul," he retorted back. His eyes were gaining its intoxicating gold liquid, and I was burned to them. Another few escaped from my eyes without permission and I reached to wipe it. So did Edward. Our hands touched and I felt his cold rocky hands above mine.
"This is the only way to live now, Edward. Why can't you accept the fact that I'm going to be changed sometime, anyway? D it, Edward! Why can't you just stop being stubborn, and let me be like you?! I've had enough, I'm ready!" I said. I didn't dare yell, I would probably break his eardrums. I wasn't that angry.
I ripped away from his firm grasp somehow managing to strangle out, and ran back into the house. The others were in the living room all sitting around doing nothing but stare into the fascinating walls. They saw and felt my, rather, abrupt entrance and came forward sympathetically.
"Oh, Bella, we heard everything you said. You're right, you need to change," Alice said comfortingly looking deeply into my eyes. I stared back daringly.
"Alice, change me now. No, never mind." I turned toward Carlisle. "Carlisle, you told me you would change me, will you?" I asked desperate for the right answer.
"I'm in a tight situation here, Bella. Actually, we all are. Edward despises you being changed, and if you don't change, you will not be safe. But either way, you're not safe," he said expertly. I hated the cold and calculating knowledge. It bit me hard. I wish it literally could.
"But, it's better that way. Then, I would be strong, and I'll be able to take care of myself!" I wanted to yell 'do you not understand', but something told me not to push it. Suddenly, the angry feeling subsided and I was back to my calm and waiting self again, waiting for the answer. The sudden change had been from Jasper's strong hold of emotions. I stole a glance at him, just in time to see him by Alice's side. His hands were resting on her shoulders and I could see the reassured look on Alice's face.
"Bella, I will ask of Edward for the last time…and…I…we'll see," Carlisle finished in definite answer in his voice. He clearly knew what Edward was going to say and we all did.
Carlisle stepped outside and a few minutes later, he came back in. Everybody must have heard the conversation, except me. Oh, the frailties of being a human.
"Bella, it's not the answer you'll expect. Edward has been actually thinking about it. He still doesn't like it, and he said if there is definitely no way that he can stop you, he says he doesn't want to be the one to change you," he said. There was sadness in his voice; Edward was his son, after all. Hard to believe with the features of young youth, but true.
"Will you?" I asked. This was my chance. Vampires could change minds like…well, like people, I guess. Carlisle seemed to be debating with himself for a moment. Emmett and Rosalie were sitting on the couch of the living room, and looked…okay. Alice and Jasper were standing next to me looking anxious. Esme was by Carlisle. This was not my intended picture of peace.
"Of course, Bella. I don't break promises. I'm just thinking of the best time—," Carlisle didn't get to finish, because just then, Alice was seeped into a trance, and a second later, she came back out gasping.
I could see Jasper's grip had tightened. He faced her and searched her face for answers.
"What is it? What did you see?" he asked, his voice low and husky. Emmett and Rosalie were up now standing directly by Esme and Carlisle. Alice was shaking terribly.
"They…they found us. I…I saw Jane smiling because…Edward and Bella were together, and they…are headed this way. Fast. They just want Bella, and possibly Edward," she finished. Then she turned around toward Jasper with her eyes widened in shock. Jasper assured her, and for a second, I wished Edward was here. Edward all of a sudden bolted through the front door and in an instant he was by my side. He looked shocked, so he obviously had heard.
"Edward, you have to change me now! They're here!" I yelled stating the obvious.
"Bella, if you are changed now, than it will take a few days for you to change and that'll be too late. We just have to get away from here, for now," he said calmly. But I could still here the steel in his voice that he was trying hard to hide.
"What about Charlie?" I was weak. I already gave up on the hope of being changed today, maybe some other time. Which was eventually going to be prodded off until I was holding a cane.
"Emmett and Rosalie will take care of him," Carlisle said considerately. His voice was so deep and lovely, that I took his word without second thought. After Carlisle had finished his last syllable, Emmett and Rosalie were already out.
"What about Renee?" I asked. Of course, she was protected. But it made me feel better, to hear the words myself. My heart was aching and sulking anyway, so it wouldn't be bad to hear words you want to.
"Alice and Jasper will take care of that," he said. I turned to look at them, but they weren't there, instead I heard the soft rev of the car outside.
"Edward? Me?" I asked nervously. The turmoil in my heart roared at the possible answers that could wash away my essence.
"I will be going with you to…possibly, China or India. Although I enjoy Australia too. And Edward is going with Esme to…somewhere," he said. He wanted to use a lighter tone. I could tell. My face fell at the mention of Edward leaving me, and I just hated it. Right now, my sole priority was to think of a plan to escape Carlisle, find out where Edward was going, and get there.
I turned towards Edward and we hugged each other tightly, he was almost choking me, and I wanted to tell him until he let go and his hands rested on my hips. I went on tip toes and kissed him lightly…at first.
Carlisle cleared his throat when we had been embraced for about five minutes. I let go of Edward forgetting to blush because I was so scared. He stared into my eyes for the last time, and said something I have already heard from him so many times.
"Be safe, Bella," he said and soon, Esme and Edward were outside getting into their cars. I was standing there very still unable to move for the fear of losing Edward's lingering touch. Carlisle saved me.
"Bella, we'd better be going. Don't worry, you'll be together again," he said as he opened the door for me and I walked out unconsciously very unaware of my reactions. We walked to his car silently and he opened the car door for me. Every move of his reminded me of Edward, and how he had done this for me.
"Well, I believe we should be moving away from Edward. I'm not quite sure where they will be going, but I guess we'd better go somewhere where they won't suspect. Where do you think is the safest place, Bella?" he asked me while I buckled my seatbelts in the front seat. I couldn't believe I was doing this, I felt weak, as if everybody was underestimating me.
"I, I don't know. Maybe Alaska?" I asked recalling me of Edward, and how he had been there when he wanted to get away from me. It was the only place that caught me. I sighed at the thought of that time.
"Okay, Alaska it is. But first, we have to change your scent. Let's go," Carlisle started the engine and drove in the familiar maniac driving skills. A single tear dropped from my eye and I quickly looked away out to the window. We didn't speak at all, and in the middle, Carlisle stopped to change cars and spray perfume all over it. We were on one of the most unused highways and the next thing I know is that while I'm looking far off to my right, I thought I caught a glimpse of a silver car.
I was dreaming, of course. Why would I see Edward now? I missed him so much already that I was hallucinating. I looked toward Carlisle was now looking so grim that I was afraid his face will be stuck in that crimpled position. I slept in the car where Carlisle was watching me from a very close distance. I could have had Edward by me doing what Carlisle was doing, but I sighed and fluttered my eyes closed. The next day, we were in Alaska. And I met someone I never would have guessed.