Realizations

Serena and Shauna had gotten quite comfortable in the café; the warm heat from the fireplace in the center, and the heavenly scent of macaroons, biscotti, and other baked goods helped them to forget their worries. Serena took a sip of her cocoa and gave a little blush as the creamy warmth brushed her cheeks.

"Wow, this really is amazing!" she said in delight.

"I told you," Shauna joked. The both of them drank from their cups and just laughed as they caught up on their newest experiences. "So, you really got an offer from Aria's agent Palermo?! I knew you were great, but that's just amazing!" Serena rubbed the back of her neck in embarrassment and blushed. "But, I don't understand, why would you turn that down?" Serena's expression changed, and she started to blush a little more.

"Well, um, you see," she replied. "I told her I wanted to wait before I went with her anywhere. I wanted to finish the journey I started with my friends first, before moving onto anything so big." Serena said she just wanted to finish what she started, but the faint blush on her face screamed Ash, in a big way, and Shauna was fluent in Attract-ish.

"Oh, I see," Shauna said teasingly. Serena just jumped and blushed even more. "It's okay, I get it… Believe me, I get it." Serena gave Shauna a suspicious glare and wondered just what she meant by that. All Shauna did was stare at her mug and over sweeten her drink, lost in thought. "Can I ask you something, personal? What do you do exactly when you think you might like a boy?" Serena blushed a bit, and then asked what she meant. "I don't mean what you do when you actually like them, I just mean when you think you may have feelings, but you don't know for sure?" At first, Serena was confused, but after a couple of seconds began to connect the dots.

"Who is he?" Serena asked bluntly. Shauna jumped and blushed, but Serena held a solid expression that said she pretty much knew.

"Nobody," Shauna stuttered. "I mean, he is somebody, but he's not exactly well known, not that he's not getting there! And, I'm not even sure I like him, I mean I don't not like him, but I don't think I like-like him. That is…" Serena just batted an eyebrow and stopped Shauna right there.

"It's Sawyer, isn't it?" She said. Shauna just stopped and stared down at her drink, blushing with a beet red face. Serena looked at her with concern and stopped her from mixing in anymore cream with her drink. "Is that why you decided to start traveling with him, because you wanted to see if you felt anything." Shauna just blushed even more and slid back in her chair while she covered her face with her hands. Serena reached over and got Shauna to remove her hands and sit up.

"The truth is, I've never actually liked a boy before," Shauna explained. "I've been friends with Tierno and Trevor since we were little, and all I ever thought was they were my best friends. But Sawyer, he's so driven to become better. He's always taking notes on battles he experiences, and he always stays so positive, even when he loses. He doesn't think of himself as weak, but he doesn't think of himself as anything special, even though he's more than he thinks. So, when I'm with him, I just feel so.. so…"

"Warm and fuzzy?" Serena interjected. Shauna gave her a nod, and Serena just sighed. "I'm not an expert on love, but I know this much: If you feel funny when you're around him that pretty much guarantees you have feelings for him. But, if you're going to go traveling with him, don't do it because you want to see if there's something between you, do it because he's a great friend, and because traveling with him means you can help each other to fulfill your dreams, so you won't feel so alone." Shauna nodded as Serena explained. "One other thing: If you like him, don't go traveling with him and expect something to happen. If you want something you have to go for it yourself, don't just expect something to happen while you're traveling together." Shauna understood everything Serena was saying and nodded in understanding. However, there was still one thing she didn't get that left a very puzzled look on her face.

"But, if that's the best thing to do when you like someone," Shauna began. "Why haven't you done the same thing and told Ash?" Serena jolted back and blushed.

"I.. I don't see how that works here," she replied. "The situation with me and Ash is different."

"Just how is it different?!" Shauna asked her. Serena just blushed more as she became flustered.

"Well, it's… it's…" She stammered. "It's a lot more complicated than you think."

"Why, because you love him?!" Shauna teased.

"No, it's not," Serena snapped.

"Your mouth says no, but your blush says yes," Shauna teased again. Serena tilted her head down and gritted her teeth.

"Shauna, drop it okay?" she said through her teeth. Shauna suddenly became worried and dropped all the teasing, but not the subject.

"You know you like him," she said bluntly. "Why don't you just do something about it already?" Serena looked at her sternly and began to retaliate.

"Because it's just not going to happen," she said.

"You don't know that," Shauna replied. "For all you know he feels exactly the same way."

"No, he doesn't!" Serena snapped.

"You won't know unless you ask him!" Shauna retaliated.

"Just shut up about it, okay?!" Serena retaliated back. "It's nothing like that!"

"Maybe it's exactly like that!" Shauna nearly shouted. "What makes you so sure it's not?!" Serena's blush now overtook her entire face, and her eyes began to tear up as she held her head down, trying to sort out her next words and tell Shauna the absolute truth. Until she simply didn't have any other way to sugarcoat it and just admitted what she was feeling.

"Because Ash has not once ever shown any interest in me!" She shouted. The entire café suddenly stopped and stared. Serena's face turned completely red as she sat back down. Shauna just stared at her with a deeply worried look on her face as she tried to figure out what to say next. Serena started to cry a little but recovered quick enough to keep from sobbing.

"Are-are you okay?" Shauna asked. Serena wiped her eyes and began to explain.

"The *sniff*," she started, holding back tears. "The difference between my love life and yours is that, with Sawyer, you have a chance to be happy. I saw how Sawyer was looking at you, the way he blushed when he looked at you, how he kept complimenting you when you were talking together, he shows every sign that he likes you back. Ash has never shown any interest in me, not when we were together at camp, not this entire last year we've been traveling together."

"How do you know he doesn't?" Shauna asked. "Maybe he just expresses his feelings differently…"

"No, he doesn't!" Serena interjected. She began to flare her nostrils a little but calmed down a little before explaining. "The face you make when you like someone, that face that shows you have some real love for them, he's never even glanced at me with that look. I know because I've made that face towards him every single day of our journey." Shauna wanted to try to prove her wrong, but she knew she had no proof that she was. Serena blew her nose in her handkerchief and dried her eyes. "I thought that maybe he did treat me special, but the truth is he treats me no differently than everyone else. All I did when I started traveling with them was think about me and Ash, not even thinking ahead about what I was actually going to do with myself, but now I've found my purpose; I want to be a performer, and I've worked hard to become one. But even now, the showcase is over, and I practically turned down the opportunity of a lifetime because of this idea that something would just start, like flowers in the rain. I thought that if I finished the last stretch with them something might finally happen between us, but I guess what I've realized is that it's just too late to try and start something without putting too much risk on something great, like our entire friendship. Hmm, and what I've also finally realized is that I'm not going to wait around anymore in hopes of something happening from unrealistic expectations." Serena felt like she had been hit by serendipity; it took an uncomfortable moment, and an awkward talk for her to finally have the realization she should've had long ago. No more waiting, she rummaged through her bag to find the one thing to help her go where she now felt she should've gone in the first place.

***Meanwhile, On the Battlefield***

"Sceptile, use Leaf Storm!" Sawyer cried out. His Sceptile whipped up a Leaf Storm that managed to lift Pikachu and send it flying, even with its Iron Tail anchor in place.

"Pikachu!" Ash cried out. Pikachu was squealing like crazy as the Leaf Storm spun him around and around, until it finally threw him into a wall, out cold. "PIKACHU!" Ash ran to Pikachu as fast as he could, while Sawyer returned Sceptile to its PokéBall, with a subtly worried expression on his face. "Are you alright buddy?" The electric mouse gave him a reassuring Pika-Pika, but Ash still grew all the more upset. Ash was off his game the entire battle, and it wasn't hard for Sawyer to take note of it. He knew something was wrong, but they had to deal with Pikachu's well-being first.

"Come on," he said. "Let's get him inside to Nurse Joy, she'll take good care of him." Ash nodded in agreement and they both rushed in. It took a few minutes for her to finish up with her last patient, but she was more than able to focus on Pikachu now that there were no other Pokémon to worry about. Ash walked over to the bench Sawyer was sitting at and let out a heavy sigh. "Are you okay?" Ash just scoffed and looked at the floor in annoyance.

"I'm-fine, alright?" he said clearly aggravated. "Why does everyone keep asking that?" Sawyer gave him his special, "you-are-kidding-right?" stare and began to poke the Beartic.

"Don't try and deny it," he said. "You were completely out of focus our entire battle, and Sceptile did more to Pikachu than it should've been able. Something's bothering you and you know it, so just say it okay?"

"Nothing, I'm telling you, Sawyer, there is nothing…" he started. Ash tried to finish that last sentence, but all starting it did was make Sawyer stare at him even more sternly. Ash was aggravated that Sawyer kept insisting, but he was right, and Ash figured maybe there was no point left in trying to hide it. "The truth is, maybe this last loss at the Kalos League has me a little more beat than I'm saying." Sawyer nodded and gave a little hmm; he expected this much from a tough trainer like Ash.

"I figured as much," he said. "Look, Ash, I know losing something big like this can be hard, but I know you. You're a really strong trainer whether you win or lose, and with your attitude, you'll just bounce back stronger than ever, ready for whatever's next." Ash began to clench his fist, annoyed that everyone expected the same thing but had no clue about the truth.

"It's not just the fact that I lost, okay!" Ash interjected. "Everyone thinks I'm just bummed about losing, but the truth is it's a lot more than that." Ash had been traveling for over 6 years now, and in spite of winning 52 badges, the Battle Frontier, and defeating several legendary Pokémon he felt like he wasn't getting anywhere. To make matters worse, he had seen and battled many Pokémon that were new to him, from yet another region he had never heard of before. He felt such a conflicting sense of adventure and pointlessness; should he try again, or after 6 years was it a sign that he should retire from a life of adventure? "I've been trying to become a Pokémon Master for a long time, but no matter how far I get, I just wind up losing. Now I know there's another region out there that I've never heard of, with Pokémon I've never seen before. I want to go, if I'm ever gonna be a Pokémon Master I need to go, but I can't help but feel like I'm stuck in one place." Sawyer hadn't been traveling as long as Ash, but he understood. For a short while, before he got more than his only gym badge, he felt like none of the things he'd learned were helping, and he was stuck too. He hated that feeling, and couldn't imagine suddenly being hit by 6 years' worth of it. He knew it was awful, but he knew how to get out of it.

"Ash," he began. "Tell me, why did you start your journey?" Ash looked at him with a really puzzled face; he thought it was obvious, but he told him.

"To fulfill my dream," he answered.

Sawyer nodded and asked, "And, if you've been doing this for so long, why have you kept journeying up until now when you felt like this?" Again, Ash thought it was obvious, but he didn't understand where Sawyer was going with this.

"Because, I haven't done it yet?" Ash answered unsurely. Sawyer batted an eyebrow with an alternate thought.

"Is that really the reason why?" Sawyer asked trying to imply something. "Are you the same guy you were when you started traveling?"

"Well, no," Ash stuttered. "When I started, all I could think about was catching and training all kinds of new Pokémon." Ash said as he started to understand.

"So whenever you lost, what happened that always made you think that the next time would be different?" Sawyer asked.

"Well, all the people and Pokémon I met along the way," Ash said. "I always showed them I was determined, and that I would never give up, even when things got tough. After I lost all those times before, I guess I wanted to try and be the person they all thought I was; I always showed them I tried to be strong, and even when I lost they always believed in me."

"Especially…" Sawyer said trying to imply something.

"Especially when it was coming from my friends," Ash said starting to realize what was going on. "I've never ended up traveling alone, but this time has been different. The friends I've made here are some of the best I've found in a long time, and all the fun we've had traveling through Kalos… I don't want that to end!" Ash looked up with a shocked expression, and Sawyer just looked at him with a satisfied smile; he finally knew what was bothering him so much, and Ash couldn't believe it. "I'm not worried nothing's going to change, my Pokémon and I are getting stronger all the time; I'm worried about losing my awesome friends!" Ash jumped up out of his seat in excitement. Ash always stayed in touch with all the other friends he traveled with, but after a while, he always felt like they started to drift apart, and he didn't want that to happen anymore. With that, Ash finally knew what he had to do, and he wasn't going to wait any longer. "I need to find the others, there's no time to lose. Thanks, Sawyer, you're the best!" Ash ran off through the halls of the Pokémon Center, in search of his companions. Sawyer just sat in his seat with a slightly smug grin about what had just happened.

"Of course," he began with a sarcastic tone. "I can't help but wonder if it's one friend, in particular, he doesn't want to lose. Oh wait, did Ash leave before I could mention that?" All Sawyer did was snicker about what he knew, and laid back to let Ash do what he had to.