SURVIVOR – FINAL FANTASY STYLE!!
Day 1
FrEaK: (in deep voice) Now, here come the members of the Final Fantasy Survivor board…**pauses** --…
EDDY, PLAY THE FRIGGIN DRAMATIC MUSIC ALREADY!
Voice in background: Sorry. Shit.
**Dramatic music plays, and slowly airship lands.**
FrEaK: Yes, indeed, here are the seven survivors! But only ONE will be on this island in the end of 14 days! **pauses** What the hell? I only count six!
(Zidane, Dagger, Steiner, Quina, Kupo, and Amarant get out.)
FrEaK: What the hell? Where's Eiko?
Kupo: **looks up at FrEaK, giggling** Well, you see, Quina was really hungry, so we drew straws, and…
Zidane: Let's just say that she got…prematurely voted off.
FrEaK: **slaps his face** Shit, you mean Quina ATE Eiko?
Quina: Me hungry! They draw! Eiko lose! **pokes her belly with fork** Quina think Eiko in better place now!
Dagger: To you, yeah – Eiko was my bitch, ho! Ya ATE my dang bitch, girl! You ain't gonna be laid by ME anymore.
Zidane: Dagger, please shut up. We don't need any sex talk here.
Dagger: Call me Daggah-ho, or you ain't my BITCH!
Steiner: **steps in between them** Now, both of you calm down. Zidane, apologize for insulting Dagger. Dagger, apologize for trying to fuck Zidane.
Zidane and Dagger: NEVER!!
**Steiner, Dagger, and Zidane get into a fist fight**
Dagger: Now neither of ya gonna be MAH bitches!
Kupo and Amarant: Hmm…decisions…who should we vote off?
Amarant: Hell, vote me off. I don't wanna be anywhere near this place any more.
Quina: ME HUNGRY!
**Amarant punches Quina with brass knuckles. Quina runs away, screaming.**
Kupo: **twangs bon-bon** Amarant…Quina's running towards me…AAH!!
**Quina picks up Kupo, and swallows him whole.**
**Amarant rushes up, punches Quina in the stomach. Quina pukes out Kupo, along with blood and 2 partially digested frogs, then pukes up a flute, ribbon, and wing ornaments.**
Kupo: Kupo! I know who I'M gonna vote out!
FrEaK: Aah, nothing like the friendships made in day 1 of SURVIVOR – FINAL FANTASY STYLE! Now, we have to go to our commercial breaks. They last a minute, but they let us skip through 3 hours of shit! And with the stuff we have for you, it'll SEEM like 3 hours!
**Commercials come on**
**SURVIVOR – FINAL FANTASY STYLE comes back on**
FrEaK: And we're back! Luckily, everyone's sleeping right now, and I must say – It's the quietest that this island has been for a long time!
**Silence broken by Dagger**
Dagger: Oh, Zidane, Zidane! Yes! Yes!
Zidane: Dagger! Yes! Ooh, deeper, deeper!
Dagger: Not until I get another 5 dollars for all this.
Zidane: Crud. **Zips up pants, gets out**
FrEaK: **Sighing** Aah shit, just forget about it. **Smiling again** Well, that's the end of day 1, folks! Enjoy, and tune in tomorrow!
Day 1
FrEaK: (in deep voice) Now, here come the members of the Final Fantasy Survivor board…**pauses** --…
EDDY, PLAY THE FRIGGIN DRAMATIC MUSIC ALREADY!
Voice in background: Sorry. Shit.
**Dramatic music plays, and slowly airship lands.**
FrEaK: Yes, indeed, here are the seven survivors! But only ONE will be on this island in the end of 14 days! **pauses** What the hell? I only count six!
(Zidane, Dagger, Steiner, Quina, Kupo, and Amarant get out.)
FrEaK: What the hell? Where's Eiko?
Kupo: **looks up at FrEaK, giggling** Well, you see, Quina was really hungry, so we drew straws, and…
Zidane: Let's just say that she got…prematurely voted off.
FrEaK: **slaps his face** Shit, you mean Quina ATE Eiko?
Quina: Me hungry! They draw! Eiko lose! **pokes her belly with fork** Quina think Eiko in better place now!
Dagger: To you, yeah – Eiko was my bitch, ho! Ya ATE my dang bitch, girl! You ain't gonna be laid by ME anymore.
Zidane: Dagger, please shut up. We don't need any sex talk here.
Dagger: Call me Daggah-ho, or you ain't my BITCH!
Steiner: **steps in between them** Now, both of you calm down. Zidane, apologize for insulting Dagger. Dagger, apologize for trying to fuck Zidane.
Zidane and Dagger: NEVER!!
**Steiner, Dagger, and Zidane get into a fist fight**
Dagger: Now neither of ya gonna be MAH bitches!
Kupo and Amarant: Hmm…decisions…who should we vote off?
Amarant: Hell, vote me off. I don't wanna be anywhere near this place any more.
Quina: ME HUNGRY!
**Amarant punches Quina with brass knuckles. Quina runs away, screaming.**
Kupo: **twangs bon-bon** Amarant…Quina's running towards me…AAH!!
**Quina picks up Kupo, and swallows him whole.**
**Amarant rushes up, punches Quina in the stomach. Quina pukes out Kupo, along with blood and 2 partially digested frogs, then pukes up a flute, ribbon, and wing ornaments.**
Kupo: Kupo! I know who I'M gonna vote out!
FrEaK: Aah, nothing like the friendships made in day 1 of SURVIVOR – FINAL FANTASY STYLE! Now, we have to go to our commercial breaks. They last a minute, but they let us skip through 3 hours of shit! And with the stuff we have for you, it'll SEEM like 3 hours!
**Commercials come on**
**SURVIVOR – FINAL FANTASY STYLE comes back on**
FrEaK: And we're back! Luckily, everyone's sleeping right now, and I must say – It's the quietest that this island has been for a long time!
**Silence broken by Dagger**
Dagger: Oh, Zidane, Zidane! Yes! Yes!
Zidane: Dagger! Yes! Ooh, deeper, deeper!
Dagger: Not until I get another 5 dollars for all this.
Zidane: Crud. **Zips up pants, gets out**
FrEaK: **Sighing** Aah shit, just forget about it. **Smiling again** Well, that's the end of day 1, folks! Enjoy, and tune in tomorrow!