As promised, here's the much longer first chapter! I'm a bit worried about my characterization...this is how I percieve their characters anyway, I hope you like them.

Please review! It really encourages me, I know loads of you have put me on story alert- it couldn't hurt to review aswell could it? (^_^) I thank you for putting me on story alert and reading too! And to those who reviewed thank you! Enjoy!

Chapter One- We are the Haunted.

Nyota Uhura did not know if she was screaming in the dream, or she was screaming when she woke. It occurred to her it was probably both.

Every night, every night it happened. Every night she relived the nightmare she so desperately wished to forget. Two months…two long months since it had happened and yet every time she woke, it was as if had just happened.

It sometimes felt like her whole heart and soul had been torn out, and she was now only body. At other times it felt as though they were still half-there, but the half that remained was not content, and was in constant screaming agony- desperately longing to be whole again. Like the ocean waves, the experience kept lapping at the shore of her conscious mind, slowly and painfully eroding who and what she once was.

There were times she was numb, that was normally the day time, perhaps the sunlight was trying to show her that life still went on- perhaps the busy day left no time to dwell on those thoughts. She could bury them for the most part…when she was busy, and she tried so very hard to stimulate her mind, just for those moments where it all seemed less unbearable. That was why she had moved to San Francisco city and became a Professor of Linguistics at the local University, away from Starfleet, but not back to her homeland. She was stuck in a limbo, a no-mans-land, she could not go back to either life.

She was no longer Lieutenant Uhura, she no longer wanted to be. She had given up a life amongst the stars, as there were too many whispers, too many memories in space. She could not go back to the United States of Africa, as she wanted to run away but was too afraid- and she wasn't a woman normally afraid- of just how far she would run if she really started, and just how long it would take for the ghosts to inevitably catch up with her when she did.

And then there were the times her bravado crumbled, and she wept and screamed and her body shook violently with grief. They were often times at night. Sometimes after those dreams and sometimes when she was at her most vulnerable, most susceptible to the memories of who once slept beside her, who once held her tightly, who once caressed her cheeks and whispered gently to her whilst she slept.

The sunlight tried to remind her life went on, but in the darkness, she knew her life was spiritually over, even if she was still physically present.

***

She liked to run.

On the weekends, there was no school, so she did what she could to keep her mind and body active. The hills of San Francisco required a great amount of effort to run on, but she found herself gaining stamina as time went on. She also found herself taking martial arts classes and yoga. All were supposed to keep her calm, focused on her 'centre'. If the thought wasn't too painful, she would have sworn she was getting to be rather Vulcan-like in her ways.

But she grew attached to no one. She didn't ever feel like she could, after all, how could she ever grow to value, to like, to love anybody when she didn't feel like she belonged anywhere, when half of herself felt no longer present? She had…companions, acquaintances, the other university professors, who she spent time with at local bars. It went nothing beyond that.

Running with her HDMP3 helped also, as she was able to focus on the music and well as her movements. She liked to match the tempo of the song with the pace of her steps as she ran. That often required an extra amount of effort that could not be obtained through listening to her surroundings. She didn't like listening to life anyway, when she was running- life was a reminder of loss, a distraction. When she ran the world, though clearly and physically visible, seemed to disappear and it was just her, the road and the music that pounded through her mind- removing all thoughts.

Routine helped her, comforted her, but also reminded her of the organised habits she had in her innocent, ignorant Academy days.

Exercise helped her build outer strength as well as inner strength and she came to think of herself as a survivor, of a person both doomed and blessed to carry on in life despite the tragedies that befell her- and she would carry on. At times of empowerment that were fairly few and far between, she thought that he, without a doubt, would wish her to not only survive but to live.

Perhaps she would live one day, but for now she was complacent with being a survivor.

It was on such a typical weekend day, two months and two days after she had been forced from living into survival, that she found herself going about her usual exercise routine. Breathe, run, listen to the beat, breathe, run, follow the beat, run, run, step after step, letting the beat control her. It occurred to her that running was like a dance, and in her former life she had loved the vivaciousness of dance. Ghosts manifested themselves in many different ways.

Some ghosts, however, were more prominent then others and certainly more forceful in their ways. Indeed the unsuspecting Uhura had no idea of the poltergeists waiting for her as she efficiently carried out her exercise regime, revelling in the few moments of peace that her day to day so-called life occasionally allowed.

It was roughly fifteen minutes into her run and she was gradually building up momentum, the exercise being far from over, when her HDMP3, on random, finished a rather up-tempo beat and switched, rather abruptly, to a very soft Vulcan Lyre piece she didn't remember uploading in the past couple of months.

She stopped dead in her tracks, feeling her chest rise and fall dramatically, the beautiful instruments resonance pouring into her ears, invading her mind and within seconds, her peace was shattered.

***

'That was beautiful Commander.' She immediately sung his praises with her usual hint of teasing, as he finished the song, feeling tears in the corners of her eyes. 'I hope you'll play some more for me in the future!'

'I am glad you thought so Cadet.' He replied coolly, as if he hadn't just blown her away with his incredible talent. Over the years that she had been taught by him, she realised that he was being modest, that this was not a symbol of his Vulcan upbringing. She noted the tiny glitter in his eyes, he had been… shy and she knew he was now relieved, perhaps even proud that she was highly impressed at his musical skills. She watched as his eyes swept up to the clock behind her, gracefully, elegantly, 'it appears we have over-run our tutoring session. Our last tutoring session. Your progress has been astounding in these three years, and I have no doubt in your superior xenolinguistic abilities.'

Uhura frowned, the knowledge that this was their last ever session wounded her, filled her with a wistful melancholy, and at the same time she delighted by his praise. 'Aw, I see. Well- Spock- I don't really mind that we overran, but if you're busy the I'm sorr-'

He spoke quicker than usual 'I am not busy Nyota, but I thank you for your consideration.'

She stood up as he said her name, the way he perfectly pronounced it always created a physical reaction from her with she desperately tried to suppress, trying to ignore the blatant sexual tension that seemed to be radiating off her and prayed that he wouldn't pick up on it. She was suddenly fully aware that he too had stood up behind her, was dangerously close to her, that she could hear him breathing and it sent a tingling sensation up her spine.

He's your teacher, he's your teacher, he's your teacher she repeated, but it made no difference, she had fallen too far by now, too deeply to- ironically enough- listen to logic. In actuality, now that their sessions had ended, classes had ended, and she was graduating in a week, she was technically no longer his student.

'Is there something erroneous with the temperature of my office?' Spock inquired, his voice snapped her out of her thoughts and she turned back around to face him.

DAMN HIS EYES! HIS EYES ARE HYPNOTIC POOLS OF SEXINESS! DON'T LOOK DIRECTLY AT THEM! Her youthful mind screamed as she was entranced by the deep brown, almost black eyes before her. Damn it!

'What?' She replied intelligently.

'You appear to have shivered, denoting that the temperature does not adequately suit your levels of comfort.' He did not appear moved by their sudden eye contact on the outside, but surely…surely he must be, deep down. She knew Vulcans weren't emotionless, the truth was far from that stereotype. Did he feel something…for her?

'Oh no, I'm fine, besides if I'd have found your office cold, you would be catching some sort of hypothermia by now wouldn't you?' She grinned playfully. 'After all you're far hotter then your average human.'

She froze, hoping he really wouldn't infer what she had accidentally implied. The heat rose to her face and she felt just about ready to die.

'Indeed.' He replied as stoic as ever, and she had to fight to exhale a sigh of intense relief 'Well then, goodnight Cadet Uhura.'

'Good night, Commander Spock.'

She left his office and leaned against the door, her heart pounding in her chest, blood reverberating in her ears. So many emotions had caused a slight dizzying sensation in her mind. From being so deeply moved by his beautiful piece of music, then amused at their quite playful banter, following a brief-but oh so powerful- moment of pure lust, all the way to mortification. All after a very energy consuming final tutoring session, she felt just about ready to pass out.

She did not know how long she stood there but it might have been a few minutes because, without a cue, the door slid open and she found herself falling backwards- straight into her tutors chest.

'Oh!' She started as she crashed into him. He prevented her from falling over further by holding on to each of her shoulders. In all the months, years she had spent time with him in, they had never once been this physically close. There had been moments, hands touched, shoulders rested against each other, legs brushed shyly yet daringly- causing her to hope, but sometimes cause her to believe she was going crazy with infatuation- that her brain was fabricating things. Like a starving girl in a desert, these moments were her oasis, but she wondered if the oasis was a mirage.

'Cadet?' He questioned as if she wasn't really there, his hands were still on her shoulders. She wasn't about to remove them.

'I'm sorry I was just resting.' She explained lamely, appalled with what had just transpired, and wondering what it was about this man that made her become so frustrating idiotic in front of him sometimes- besides from her amazing academic accomplishments of course.

'Are your quarters dissatisfactory? I would advise you to make a complaint to your advisor, if the door to my office provides more comfort.' He was teasing her, and he still hadn't let go. Gaila would have said that, in Vulcan-to-Human translations, he might as well have been feeling her up. The thought was not entirely horrifying. In fact it was the opposite. It thrilled her… but perhaps it was simply concern on his part?

'No.' She span around, determined to save some dignity. Sliding out of his grasp, reluctantly, now truly feeling cold, she gazed at him with a fixed and defiant stare. If she had been six years old she would have been crossing her arms and poking out her tongue, for now she settled with a sassy hand-on-hip action. 'It has just been a long day, I needed to conserve energy before making the trip back to my room.'

'Would you like to sit down?'

'No, I have taken up enough of your time and I'm not really that tired.' She didn't want him to think of her as being weak. She knew within herself that she was far from it.

'My time is not currently consumed by other matters, as I mentioned previously. It may do well for you to at least have a glass of water before you go. My quarters are not a far excursion, and would not waste a lot of your energy.'

Spock's quarters…Spock's bedroom…Spock's bed…Spock in bed…Spock in bed with her. His invitation had been the straw that broke the camels back.

'Spock, are you attracted to me?'

His eyebrows raised dramatically, if for a moment, before his Vulcan side took over and hid what was blatantly shock at her frankness.

After some time he responded. 'You are…physically appealing. Many other Cadets have commented on this.' He replied, his muscles were strained, as if there was some kind of inner struggle going on- this was not going to be easy 'I fail to see how this corresponds to our previous topic of discuss-'

'Yes, yes, other people find me attractive, I don't care what they think.' She cut across him, swallowed nervously, and realised that it was now or never lowering her voice, she carried on 'But I care what you think. More then any other person I've ever met.'

There was a moment of agonising silence before he replied. 'This could be deemed an inappropriate course of discussion.'

'It could be, and please- don't quote regulations. It's just, I'm a third year now, you've been teaching me for three years, if I wanted to be with you only to get a grade- don't you think I would have done it by now?'

He seemed to genuinely consider her point, as his eyes had grown slightly distant, deep in concentration and Uhura felt incredibly proud of herself. After another moment of silence, he replied in his usual logical manner. 'You make a valid argument Cadet.'

'I'm graduating in a week, I know I haven't yet but I felt I would explode if I didn't tell you. I mean I've been holding back my feelings for years because I respected you and the rules too much. But now I feel that I don't need to, we've finished being student and teacher, and like I said, I'm graduating in a week.' She inhaled deeply 'Spock, I have feelings for you that go far beyond student and teacher, further beyond friendship even…but how do you feel about me?'

He didn't reply, his eyebrows creased. She took a chance, raised her hand and touched the side of his face, caressing his cheek, and was both surprised and thrilled when he slowly, and almost tenderly, leaned into her touch.

'Spock?' She dropped her voice, it was softer, loving, one of the sides of herself she had wanted to show him, and him only, for so long.

'I have found you to be a fascinating, intelligent, and…deeply alluring woman. And I wish to spend more time with you in the future, if you would permit it.' His voice was clear and true, and- as the words dripped from his pale lips- Uhura found herself falling even more in love with him. But his words, and the way he stared at her, so intensely, as if her were connecting to her very being through such a seemingly simple act, arose a different and more urgent feel within her.

'I would like that very much.' She smiled at him affectionately, as heartfelt as she possibly could, her eyes sparkling with the warmth of a successful, united and requited love. Her thumb stroked his cheek gently whilst her fingers ran carefully over the tips of his ears.

'Nyota.' He whispered her name in a way he never had done before, suddenly full of emotion, and whilst this caused her eyes to widen, her breath to quicken- the lids of eyes drooped and he brought his own hand to meet hers, leading it down his face, to his warm, soft lips- leaning into her palm, kissing it tenderly. Nyota nearly whimpered in delight, up until this point- this was the most erotic moment of her life.

'Spock.' She replied, copying his tone. He opened his eyes again and searched for something in her own Earth-coloured orbs. She knew her answer, and nodded slowly.

It was in that moment that their longing finally ended, and they shared in the silent promise of their first kiss.

It began slowly, slightly unsurely, like stepping off of a transporter and onto new soil for the first time. This feeling did not last long however, as Uhura wrapped her arms around her former teacher, and blanket of darkness surrounded her as her eyes closed. And all she knew was his body and her own, pressed tightly against each other, and the sensations he created as he held her waist, as they massaged their lips against the each other. She trembled.

When they parted, purely for oxygen-related reasons, he rested his forehead against hers. She knew this to be a deep and highly significant Vulcan gesture and her whole being seemed to elevate beyond mere happiness. She swallowed down her own awe and took a deep breath.

'I wonder…Commander, whether or not the invitation to your quarters is still open?' She grinned and raised her eyebrow suggestively.

The corners of his mouth twitched and he displayed his far superior eyebrow raising abilities (Nobody on Earth could match that talent Uhura thought amused). 'I believe it is Cadet.'

'Good.' She replied firmly, kissing him again.

***

With a cry of both shock and grief, she tore the headphones away from her ears. Her music player was tugged along with it and the both went skidding to the ground, shattering against the concrete.

'SHIT!' she cursed dropping to her knees and scooping up her damaged equipment, Uhura noticed that memory card was missing and she noticed it had flung itself into the alley next to her. She went over to it and began repairing the injured player, trying to focus on that activity and that activity only. She would not cry, no matter what she had just been violently forced into remembering, she would not cry. Not here, not now.

At that moment she felt a hand reach out and hold her own. Suddenly very aware she was in an alley, and knowing fully well what stereotypically occurred between unsuspecting women and preying men in alleys, she grabbed her potential attackers arm, twisted it, and threw him over her shoulder- suddenly grateful for her fast progress in Self Defence.

Her attempted attacker groaned at her feet. He reeked on alcohol, his eyes were bloodshot and ringed with dark shadows from lack of sleep and his chin was covered in grubby stubble. He looked up at her with a familiar cocky grin.

'Kirk?! Jim Kirk?!' She questioned disbelievingly, shocked.

'Hey Uhura.' He hiccupped in response. 'Long time no see… be a doll and help me up would ya?'

Sighing in defeat at the fact that today would definitely not go as she planned, a very sober Uhura pulled a very drunk Jim Kirk to his feet.

***

I hope you enjoyed the Spock/Uhura moment, it was certainly a new experience for me to write such a scene with such interesting characters! Please review :) I'd love to hear you opinions!