- Giles' Apartment : After a Lot of Explaining and then Shouting of Things Expressing Disbelief-

Faith shakes her head and trying to ignore the way that B had just stormed out of the apartment claiming she 'needed some air.' She had long since learned what that meant. But, as she usually does when they're having a fight, Faith does her best to focus on her work. Or at least the task at hand in this case given the apparent lack of a Sunnydale County Sheriff's Office in this version of reality. Besides, she thought, Giles and X-man would get her to calm down if anyone could.

Besides, she's hardly wanting for readily available distractions. Holding up the unfamiliar backpack, she raises an eyebrow at the embroidered 'Faith' on it. She keeps it raised as she looks back to Willow who'd handed it to her a moment before.

"What's wrong? Um... I mean... besides… you know..." Willow shrugs sheepishly.

"...I've never seen this bag before in my life. You sure I was wearin' it when you found me?"

Willow glances at Dawn, who nods. "Yeah, and it's… locked..." Willow trails off as Faith tugs on the zipper and it slides easily along the track. "How did you do that? None of us could open it. The zipper just wouldn't move."

"Freaky." Faith stares at the backpack a bit more carefully before finally deciding 'to hell with it' and pulling it open, revealing a small glass sphere giving off a faint yellow glow. Reaching in and pulling it out, Faith looks it over.

"Ohh!" Anya leans forward in her seat. "We have one of those too!"

"You do?" Faith looks at it closely for a second before setting it down on the table. "Any idea what it's for? I think I remember Jack having it when Glory showed up back home, but I was kind of distracted at the time. Could be important though, even if it doesn't explain why the bag is so hea...vy..." Faith trails off as she glances down into the bag again, frowning in consternation. "Okay, that was not there a moment ago."

Pulling the massive hammer out of the bag, Faith holds up the bag next to the hammer and confirms her suspicion that the hammer is indeed much larger than the bag it was just pulled out of. "Wicked! They finally figured out how to do that." Faith lets a genuine smile creep across her face, one of her first since waking up in this crazysauce version of home. "Okay, so this I remember. We use it to… Ahem… apply blunt force trauma to the perps. Repeatedly, on an ongoing and as needed basis to ensure their continued cooperation. Glory required a lot of extra convincing." Her smile turns slightly wistful at the memories. Who says you can't love your job?

"Whats with the croquet mallet?" Spike asks, walking back in with a fresh mug full of pig's blood.

"What in huh now?"

"The hammer you're holding? It looks like the one in the display case you lot lifted off that troll fellow 'cept it's been painted. See those blue stripes on the head and handle there? Looks like a croquet mallet."

"That the game with the balls and white hoop thingies?"

"Uh, yeah. You play?"

"No, but that's what's next in the bag." Faith upends the bag and six white… no, they're three full circles not six U shaped hoops. "What the shit?" Setting the hammer down on the floor as she crouches down, and studiously ignoring the loud groan of protest the floor gives in response, Faith pokes at one of the white circular rings. "That's… that's a pylean slave collar. One of the older models."

"A what!?"

"It's a dimension a short bit thataways," Faith explains without pointing in any particular direction. "The demons there keep human slaves in line with these things. Step out of line and it tazes you. Or, you know, blows your head up."

"How do you know that?"

"Jack and I pop over whenever we're bored… or need to blow off steam and sex ain't cuttin it." Faith rolls her eyes at the others' expressions. "What? Girl can't have a hobby?" She sighs at the continued stares. "We'd hit a farm or two and steal the slaves, take their collars and stick them on the local demon clergy before skidaddling after breaking the release mechanism so it was damned near impossible to remove them. They eventually came up with a newer version that wouldn't latch on to demons but it was a good time while it lasted."

After another moment of awkward silence greets her statement, Faith starts to fidget in her seat slightly. "...What?"

"Oh! I know this one." Anya finally speaks up excitedly. "You forgot to say, 'I guess you had to be there' at the end. That's what I do when they act like this after I tell them a story."

"Right…" Faith nods. "Thanks, Ahn. I guess they probably would need to have been there. Anyway… Like I was sayin tho, these are the older models. Someone painted them white for some reason."

Willow coughs awkwardly. "Is there anything else in that bag?"

"I don't think so?" She shakes the still upside down bag a few times to illustrate her point and then sighs as she realizes something is falling out with each shake.

By spontaneous mutual and unanimous accord no one acknowledges the large dildo painted to look like a croquet stake as it rolls across the table towards a suddenly wide-eyed Dawn. Instead they all watch as a glass vial, filled with a strange glowing liquid, makes a loud pinging noise as it bounces off the table and starts to roll away before hitting the sock that came out just before it. Finally, a fortune cookie comes bouncing out the other way and misses the table completely, winding up on the floor.

One last shake and one of the postcards Harms and Ames made out of the various Winters family photos falls out. Looks like last Christmas's if she's remembering the picture right.

Faith shakes her head, and tries to resist a smile as she flips it over. Looking at the back, Faith doesn't resist the sudden urge to curse at length as all the Scoobies present look on in confusion save for Spike who looks amused.

"Something wrong?"

Faith makes eye contact with Spike across the table and nods. "This," she holds up the postcard, "is mother's handwriting."

"Bloody hell it's strange to hear you call her that."

"Yeah, well, story of my life. Just be fuckin' thankful she doesn't make you attend the tea parties. Christ, that woman and the damned lemons." Faith stares at the postcard as one might a bomb before taking a deep breath and giving it a read...

My Littlest Moonshine,

Miss Edith says I should help you pack for your adventure. Exciting things, adventures. Do remember to come home though, the stars are all agog to hear how it goes and shall be very cross if you never tell them.

-Mumsie

Faith drops her head and begins banging it against the table repeatedly.