Aquatic Teem Hungry Farce Season 1
Chapter 2. T2: Turkatron Returns
Rain poured and lightning flashed over an old gothic castle in New Jersey.
"Gentlemen, behold!" exclaimed Dr. Weird. "Its begins... again!"
"What begins?" Steve asked. "Its as in the possessive or it's as in it is?"
"Stop making my brain hurt!" the doctor yelled.
XXX
"Sock knock!"
"Who's there?" Meatwad asked as Frylock answered the door.
Frylock groaned. "Oh no, not you again!"
"Behold! It is I, Turkatron 5000!" spoke the mechanical turkey.
"Oh, so it's Turkatron 5000 now is it?" Frylock asked.
"Yes, the rogue chicken cyberpsychologists upgraded me with the latest techno-spiritual software so that I may shift dimensions and complete my secret mission to unassassinate the ancestor of Goblox, the great turkey bodhisattva!" replied Turkatron now Turkatron 5000.
"Mhm, well that's great." Frylock said. "But there aren't any turkeys here."
"So you might think Fry-person. But nothing is what it seems to be on the surface, beneath the appearance lies a deeper reality that can only be comprehended by those with eyes to see and nostrils to smell." spoke Turkatron 5000 from now on just plain Turkatron.
"Well, I guess if you want to hang out a bit, that's cool." Frylock said letting him in.
Turkatron scanned the area with his astral vision. "Not detecting any turkeys or chickens."
"Like I said, there aren't any here pal." Frylock told him.
"But there will be." Turkatron said. "There will be."
"Alright, have fun." Frylock said going back to his lab.
"I'm bored, wanna play a game?" Meatwad asked.
"There can be no games meat creature." replied Turkatron. "Life is struggle. Struggle between the turkeys and chickens who have fought a never ending war with each other in this and other galaxies. Other worlds and other dreams sometimes suspected but rarely known."
Meatwad turned on his Atari game system and began playing Space Invaders.
"This reminds me of a great battle that took place in another round with another person who felt himself to be I just as I feel myself to be I today. A battle whose fury was so great it reverberated throughout all time recreating itself in its own image again and again with different faces for all of eternity." Turkatron rambled.
"Oh shoot, I died." Meatwad said. "Here, you try."
Turkatron picked up the controller and began playing. "No one knows when the intergalactic war between chickens and turkeys began and no one knows when or if it will ever end. Perhaps no one wants it to end. Perhaps warriors don't want to win but merely to struggle."
"Holy! You done got the high score!" Meatwad exclaimed as the scoreometer read 666,666.
"Ah, a synchronicity!" Turkatron exclaimed upon seeing his score.
"Yeah, a synyoshitsniffy." said Meatwad.
"Die chickens, die!" Turkatron said pressing the red button as fast he could.
"Oh shidamn, thay got ya." Meatwad said as Turkatron lost a life.
"The chickens have high-jacked this timeline!" Turkatron said whipping out his laser-guided sock.
BOOM! The tv blew up after Turkatron shot it.
"Hey! That's our tv!" Frylock shouted as he came in to see what caused the noise.
"It was emitting a micro-frequency which demetabolized the atoms within your bodies making you more susceptible to the chicken's diabolical influence." Turkatron replied. "The frequencies from your televisions and radios are dangerous. They contain astral waves that imbed your subconscious mind with suggestions sent from dark chicken magicians."
"Get out!" Frylock commanded and Turkatron exited.
Shake walked in having awoken from his nap. "Hey guys, did I miss anything?"
"Nope." Frylock and Meatwad replied.
XXX
Turkatron scanned Carl's house. "Hmm, that's suspicious."
"One and two and one and two and..."
"Oh yeah!" Carl exclaimed. "This Butt Master Yoga dvd is freakin' awesome!"
CRASH! Turkatron burst through the window.
"Hey! Ever heard of a door bell?" Carl asked angrily.
Turkatron ignored him and aimed his laser-guided sock at the television.
"No!" Carl cried as the tv burst into flames.
"I have saved you from the corruption and filth the chickens create." Turkatron declared.
"You saved me from havin' a good time there too buddy!" Carl complained.
"Long, long ago my friend, you too were once a turkey." Turkatron told him.
"Oh really? Did I go around blowin' up people's tvs like a douche too?" he asked.
"No, the great war hadn't reached such grandiose proportions yet." Turkatron answered. "It was during a past that may still be our future, in the endless fields of Turkeysylvania. We were gathered to celebrate the once and future king the avatar Goblox. The Turkey from another place."
"And this has what to do with me Turkey man?" Carl asked impatiently.
"You were there. You were my brother. Your blood was still pure because you had not yet mixed with monkeys and chickens and devolved into a human yet. A yet that was once before in another dream long forgotten."
"You're stupid." Carl told him.
"You have fallen into a deep spiritual sleep." Turkatron said. "But I can help you to transmute yourself into a full blooded turkey again. Goblox will be awaiting us beyond the stars."
"He's gonna be waitin' a long time." Carl said popping open a beer.
"Don't drink that!" Turkatron exclaimed ka-smacking it out of his hands. "That contains mind control poisons to destroy what little turkey dna you have left!"
"Touch my beer again and you won't have any turkey dna left either." Carl said.
"You've been lost to the chickens. They have totally corrupted you. I feared this day would come. A day that isn't a day and a come that never comes." Turkatron said.
Carl continued to gulp down beer. Turkatron left and continued searching for Goblox. He searched and searched outwards until finally, exhausted, he began to search for Goblox within. There he would find him, a him who wasn't him, but her, and him aswell. Beyond the stars Goblox was waiting, gathering his army for a great battle against the chickens. A battle that had taken place before and would take place again but with others in a totally different dream that is still yet forever the same.