Finding Mordor
By Squishy
Oh man, that last chapter was depressing, was it not?! Thank you to my two reviewers! Your encouragement is enough! To the Crazy One: thank you! – and I believe we have the same outlook on nasty reviews. :P Oh, and luckily for y'all, it'll get cheery from here, then depressing again, ... and so on and so forth.
Although I very much wish it to be, Lord of the Rings is not my property. But if I could just get the hang of my Imperius Curse and get it perfect, it WOULD be mine. Maybe in a few years...
Year 2989
In the Year 2989, Bilbo arrived on the doorstep of the Brandybuck family. Primula was a Brandybuck before she married Drogo, and it was her family that had been taking care of Frodo for the past nine years. They were nice people, but they were incredibly well-respected hobbit clan. This meant that they had no adventures, did nothing peculiar, and were quite, well, normal, which bored Frodo. However boring, though, he did admire them for being kin to many of the Shire Thains. Bilbo would visit from time to time, to check on him and simply be there for companionship. When Bilbo arrived this time, it was September 22nd: his twenty-first birthday and Bilbo's ninety-ninth birthday.
"Frodo, my lad!" he exclaimed, embracing his nephew-cousin. "Happy birthday!"
"Happy birthday to you, too, Uncle!" he said, grinning.
"Unfortunately, my visit today shan't be more than a few minutes," said Bilbo. Frodo's face fell. He relished Bilbo's visits, which usually lasted for a few days. "But, fortunately, you will be returning with me! I have taken guardianship over you, m'boy."
Immediately, Frodo's entire face lit up, his cheeks turning pink, reminiscent of his late father.
Frodo packed his bags immediately, and thanked his Brandybuck family immensely. And they were off. The two left their home in Buckland and traveled all the way into the Westfarthing, to Hobbiton. The two finally came to rest in Bag End, just above the lane of Bagshot Row. The foremost part of the property was fenced by a small, hobbit-sized picket fence. In the front of the hobbit hole, there was a large, round, bright green door with a big brass knob. There were many round windows looking into its many rooms, and there was a very expansive and well cared for garden off to the side.
"Bilbo, I've never seen Bag End before!" said Frodo excitedly as they entered Bag End.
"And how do you like it?"
"Oh, it's wonderful!" There were numerous rooms – too many to count at first glance.
"Good, good," said Bilbo, chuckling. "I inherited it from my parents – Bungo and Belladonna. Oh, and sometimes you might see some of my other relatives come – the Sackville-Bagginses – and if they come, I'm not at home. I'm never at home for them."
"May I ask why?"
"They want Bag end, of course! For some reason, they believe they have some claim to it, and since I have no heir, they are especially persistent. Hopefully no longer..."
Frodo looked at him inquisitively, saying nothing but still encouraging him to continue.
"... Ah yes, Frodo, as you are now under my care, you are officially my adopted heir."
The young hobbit flushed with gratitude and stammered his gratitude.
"Welcome back, Master Baggins Sir!" said a jolly voice from outside. "Didn't expect you back so early!"
"Hallo there, Samwise!" smiled Bilbo, greeting a young, slightly heavy-set hobbit, about the same age as Frodo, with curly, golden hair. Standing next to him, beaming, was a man who looked just like him, but many years older and a bit taller. "Frodo, this is Samwise Gamgee, and his Gaffer, Hamfast Gamgee. They manage the grounds here at Bag End."
"And a wonderful job they do of it too!" cried Frodo, shaking their hands. "Wonderful to meet you!"
Over the next twelve years, they lived together like best friends and cousins and nephew-and-uncle alike. Bilbo taught him many things, including elvish and some of the ways of the outer world. Many times, Gandalf the Wizard called on them to visit. Frodo loved those times – and many of the younger children (who were young enough not to care that Gandalf was, indeed, a "disturber of the peace") would follow him around Hobbiton to see his infamous fireworks, clapping and laughing at the small explosives. Frodo and Samwise also became great friends, as well, although Samwise would ever insist on calling him "Mister Frodo."
The long expected party celebrating both Frodo's and Bilbo's birthdays – Frodo being thirty-three now, and Bilbo being eleventy-one – was over. In the middle of his grand speech, he vanished into thin air. No doubt, Frodo knew, that he had used his magic ring – the one he'd found on his adventure with Gandalf, Thorin Oakenshield, and the other dwarves from the Lonely Mountain.
"Bilbo?" he called, running into Bag End. His small, golden ring lay on the ground just beyond the front door. He picked it up. "Bilbo, where are you?"
The tall, grey wizard sat by the fire, puffing a long wooden pipe. He was deep in thought. "Gandalf?"
"Ah, Frodo, my lad. Bilbo's gone – he went to stay with the elves. Bag End is yours, now," said Gandalf, answering Frodo's unasked questions. "Oh! Bilbo's ring... May I?"
Gandalf grabbed the ring quickly out of Frodo's palm, and, treating it like it were too hot to touch, tossed it immediately into the fire place.
"AHHH! What are you doing?!?!" cried Frodo as Gandalf tossed the red-hot ring back into his palm.
"Don't worry. It's quite cool."
And so it was – Frodo felt a slight tingling sensation emanating from the ring rather than the scalding pain he had anticipated.
"That – " said the Wizard. "is none other than the ring of the Dark Lord Sauron himself. And, it seems that Gollum revealed all the information that would lead them straight into your home and destroy EVERYTHING you know and love! Now, because I am cunning and know how to weasel out of commitment while sounding like I might actually be helping, what are you going to do about it?"
Frodo blinked his huge eyes. They stared at each other for a long time.
"AAAA--CHOO!" erupted a very loud sneeze from just outside the parlor window.
Gandalf snuck up to it, and bopped whomever it was outside right on the head with his staff, and dragged them inside by the collar.
"Sam!" said Frodo, instantly recognizing the tubby hobbit with dirt all over his hands and fingers.
"Well, that settles it!" said Gandalf, clapping his fists together. "It's time. Off you go! I'll meet you in Bree, at the Prancing Pony, Mr. Underhill."
And with that, two very confused hobbits by the names of Frodo Baggins and Samwise Gamgee (who was forced to tag along by threat of being turned into a frog) left Bag End, Hobbiton, and all they knew and treasured for an adventure that would change their lives forever.
A/N; As you can see, I'm not just writing the entire Finding Nemo script and changing names to Lord of the Ringy names. I'm actually attempting a storyline! Also, I am incredibly lazy and don't feel like rewriting the Lord of the Rings book or movie. I'm planning on skirting around the crisped edges and ironed out details. If you are a fan of LotR, I would assume you know the plot, and I really don't feel like ripping off JRRT and passing it off as my own too much. Next chapter will have more Nemo integration once we get Pippin and Meriadoc into the picture.