When the world stopped spinning at warp speed I was standing outside a towering tree, the inside had been hollowed out. The tree was a solid 100 feet high, strange illumination radiated from the few small windows. It took me a moment to realize this is where Rose and I had started a family. I glanced at myself and noticed I was transparent, looking into a creek I saw I was invisible. Knowing I couldn't be seen I walked into the house. My younger self was beating a small, frail boy with a tree branch. He had light pink hair that went to his cheeks, flashes of gold could be seen behind his long bangs. His shoulder blades and hip bones stuck out, his arms, legs and chest were scarily tiny and every bone in his body could be counted. Every time the boy was hit with the branch his starved body would bruise and break. When his bangs fell out of his sunken in eyes they were full of determination, showing no pain. Then I saw the boy he was standing in front of. He looked exactly like me, black, shaggy hair and golden eyes. Not as bright as mine and there was a streak of pink in his bangs. I recognized him to be Morgath, my youngest child. The boy bravely protecting him was Lucifer, my middle child. Unbelievably ,though Morgath was several inches taller then Lucifer, the youngest was 4 years younger. Lucifer was 13 and had the body of a starved 5 year old. My wife, Rose, was in a corner, sobbing in terror and despair. A sadistic smirk remained glued to my younger self's face as he nearly bludgeoned my middle son to death. Horror flashing through his younger brother's eyes as he watched him fall to the ground, many of his bones broken, bleeding and bruised horribly. "I... I did this...?" I whispered to myself, from a bystander's view this was despicable and heart-breaking. To myself when I was younger this was fun and a fitting punishment for weakness.
Then this reality began to fade. I could see the tree I'd called home in the distance, my sobbing wife and youngest buried Lucifer. Who's starvation and dehydration had finally taken him. My rather cruel young self was leaning against a tree, eyes angry and cold. This had never happened, is this one of the many outcomes my abuse could have caused? I know I'm a psycho but could I have truly been this cruel? It was all too far-out. Too strange. This outcome faded to another memory. Lucifer was older now and looked his age, he looked horribly Anorexic and seemed even weaker. He and his brother had moved away after Rose died and I sold my eldest daughter to angels. This I remember. Lucifer was riding on the back of a velociraptor with red scales, a black stripe down its back with black streaks branching off. Morgath walked beside them, he was about 13 years of age now and his bright eyes held deep worry for his older brother. It was clear in his young features he didn't want to lose the last shred of family he had left. Lucifer looked at him, "Do you need to ride on Azriel's back?" He shook his head, "No, Lucy. I can walk, you barely can." He weakly ruffled his younger brother's hair, "I'm fine, lil bro."
Morgath stamped his foot, "No you aren't! You've never been fine! Not since I can remember! Dad always threatened to beat me but you took it for me!"
Lucifer's expression grew hard, "I was trying to keep you from getting hurt."
Morgath stomped his foot again, "I could have taken it!"
"Well I didn't want you to take it, Morgath. I'm your older brother and it is my responsibility to protect you."
"You nearly killed yourself doing it!" The youngest screeched in anger, guilt, and frustration.
"It wouldn't matter if I had died, Morgath. As you can see I'm already well on my way to that fate. You are young and strong and if anyone has a better chance of surviving it's you. I was willing to get myself killed because I'd rather die protecting you then die in my sleep of starvation."
My eyes watered, I caused all of this. Me alone. I should have protected both of them. How could I beat either one of them? Especially Lucifer. He had been willing to sacrifice himself to keep his little brother safe, he put himself in constant pain. I abandoned them. I starved Lucifer. I threatened Morgath. This could have all been stopped...
*~What you think so far? Drop me a message :) ~*