I don't remember the details. I remember trying to run. I remember trying to resist. I remember the fear that made my entire body quake as the titan raised me to his mouth. I remember the pain that radiated through my body, the scream that left my lips. I remember the feeling of free fall, as the titan got distracted… and then nothing.
I see bright light.
Why is there a faint sobbing in the distance?
Why does it sound like –
He blinked the fog out of his eyes, squinting as they adjusted to the sudden darkness. Where… Where was he? He had never been in this part of the district before, and there was no one he could ask.
Marco looked around, confused, distraught. It was so dark he could hardly see a thing. He squinted, could've have sworn that he saw a steady glow in the distance. Maybe whoever was there could help him out.
He walked.
Walked.
Walked.
Brows furrowing together, he walked.
Something didn't seem to add up…
How… Just how did he end up here?
How is it that prior to this he couldn't remember anything at all?
Where was everyone else anyway?
His brows knitted together in concentration, trying to make sense of this. It didn't add up. He couldn't even dig out his memories. He had nothing to help him solve this mystery.
Nothing.
Dread washed over him. Suspicion clouded his brain. Panic gripped his heart.
Look up.
Having no idea where that command came from, he did it anyway.
Jean…?
The man was hunched over, one hand supporting his weight on the ground, another at his throat. It was soft, but Marco could hear the sobs. He could see the shaking.
His own breathing hitched. It pained him to see someone he cared about looking so broken, so lost. He reached forward, wanting to give the blonde a reassuring pat on his shoulder –
His hand went straight through.
What?
Breathlessly, he looked at his hands in horror. No. This couldn't be. It couldn't –
He tried again.
His hand went right through, just as if he didn't exist. Just as if he was –
"No, no, no," he shook his head, eyes wide with horror. It didn't make sense. It must be a nightmare. He would wake up and Jean would be beside him. He still had things to tell him. So many things he wanted to experience with him. And they were going to do it once he woke up.
He'll tell him how he felt immediately when he woke up. He'll say those three words; bring Jean's face closer to him as he took him by surprise, taking his breath away with a passionate kiss. They'll smile sheepishly at each other, and he'll apologise for being so abrupt. They'll probably annoy the hell out of the other trainees, but it didn't matter as long as they were happy.
Yes, that must be the case. He should wake up now. Wake up now, Marco. Wake up.
Wake. Up!
He gasped, still staring at his outreached hand. His eyes flitted to Jean, body still wrecked with sobs.
Back at his hand.
He couldn't be dead.
No…
"Jean…" he let out, his breathing laboured. "Jean…"
I wasn't strong enough.
Now I'm dead.
And I broke my promise.
I'm so sorry, Jean.
Marco fell to his knees in front of his best friend, his crush, willing him to just look up. He just wanted Jean to see him one last time. See him well. Not like how his corpse looked like. He needed to say goodbye, goddammit!
A single tear rolled down his cheek.
And landed on Jean's hand.
"Marco," the sobbing blonde gasped, his head snapping up, and saw. They both saw, eyes wide with disbelief. Their last glimpse of each other, so broken, so confused.
I'm so sorry, Jean. I'm sorry I'm leaving you like this. But stay strong for me. Please.
Maybe I'll meet you again in the next life.
Maybe we'll be happy there.
But I can't stay. I have to go. And you have to go on with your life too.
I'm… sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you... I'm sorry I didn't have the courage before, and now it's too late.
I... I love you. I love you so much, Jean.
Adieu... mon amie.