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"Searching for Peace"
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Frequently, in the early morning, before the artificial colony sun rises, I awaken to find that Quatre has gone.
I know that he feels crowded, opressed, so I give him this brief moment. . . though I don't think it really helps that much.
I can see the tension in his shoulders; the weariness in his steps. The exhaustion in his eyes and the constant pain etched into his expression.
I know he doesn't eat, nor does he sleep; and the vermin he works with eat what's left of him.
I hate them. For what they're doing to Quatre. . .
I want to kill each and every one of them. In the most painful of ways.
But I won't.
It would be counterproductive. It would cause more harm to Quatre than it would relieve. I couldn't do that to him.
I want to help him find what he's been longing for. I want him to find a sense of peace that he hasn't had.
Drifting in space. Alone. Without even my own memories to give comfort. . . I never want to experience that again. It still haunts me. It was so cold. So empty. So. . . dead. . .
That is what Quatre wants. It's what he needs.
Empty peace. A calming peace of mind and soothing for his tortured heart and soul.
Real reast.
I will search for it until I find it.
For Quatre. . .
I will find that Peace.