Chapter 2

Anna slips out of her car in the GH parking garage. After determining that Valentin's vehicle is nowhere in sight, she resigns herself to another solo therapy session.

She smoothes her skirt and pushes back a wisp of hair, beginning to regret the particular amount of care she took in looking her best this afternoon.

As she enters the elevator, sadness drapes like a weight over her shoulders. She wonders why Valentin's absence matters so much.

"I guess I'll have to ask Andre," she whispers, shaking off the heaviness and reminding herself, "He never promised to come."

As her elevator car approaches the designated floor, she puts on a serene and unrevealing expression, as her prim and proper British mother always taught her to do. But it feels false, and she wishes she were more comfortable expressing her emotions in the moment.

"I've come a long way, but I've still got a ways to go." She sighs.

The doors open, and she steps lightly, deliberately, out of the elevator, ready to face a heavy – and lonely – session.

She nearly misses her footing when she rounds the corner to Andre's door and finds Valentin and the doctor waiting.

Mother be damned, she thinks, and directs a warm smile at Valentin.

"So, you're both early," Dr. Maddox says. "That's a good sign. Shall we go in?"

"I'm not sure why I'm here," Valentin hedges. "But it seemed important to Anna."

"Let's see what happens," she says softly. "Maybe if we can find a little peace, it will be worth it."

He nods and gives her his patented crooked smile, revealing nothing.

It occurs to Anna that she's not the only one who has emotional barriers to break through.

"You two have known each other a very long time," Andre states the obvious after they're settled. "I think it would be productive to begin at the beginning and talk about your time at the academy. Anna, since we've discussed some of this in our earlier meetings and it's fresh in your memory, maybe you would pave the way?"

Anna hesitates, uncertain what she expects from a joint session and unprepared that Valentin decided to show up. Exploring her resolve to be more honest, more revealing, she launches into the story of their shared youth, to the best of her memory.

"Valentin was my closest friend at the academy," she starts. "Perhaps my only friend."

She sees a flicker of surprise in his eyes, but the fact that he doesn't dispute her version gives her the encouragement to go on.

She shares how she depended on Valentin's friendship, along with his coaching in a number of her classroom subjects. How they spent hours together every day – mostly in quiet spots far away from their heckling classmates. She remembers the taunts about "beauty and the beast," and how she sought to shield him from the unkindness that surrounded them.

"Valentin was – still is – brilliant, and he was generous in sharing his study drills with me. With his help, I aced all my classes. After our, um, falling out, I was able to graduate with high honors, but only because of the foundation he'd already laid for me. I couldn't have done it without him."

She pauses, looking at him steadily. "I never thanked you for that. I never had the chance."

She sees him swallow hard and start to speak. Realizing he's about to stammer, she takes his hand, comfortingly.

He mouths the words, "Thank you," takes a breath, and articulates slowly and clearly.

"I admit, I'm stunned that the prettiest girl in school considered me her only friend – but I'll take her word for it. She was my only friend, but that's no surprise. She's the only one who showed me any kindness. She was my world, and her presence in it validated my entire existence.

"Every hurdle she surpassed became my victory, too. Her success encouraged me so much that I adapted my study protocols to meet her needs, equipping her to master challenges in ways that were best for her."

"You did that again this morning," Anna marvels.

He tips his head. "Old habits, I guess."

He continues. "Our 'falling out,' as you call it, was a crushing blow – worse than you can imagine. You were my friend, the person I was closest to above all others. But you didn't want me to celebrate your birthday with you. After that, I disappeared. I was skilled at hiding, so I don't recall us coming face to face again until I showed up in Port Charles last year. I'm ignoring the whole Alexandra incident, of course, since that wasn't you.

"You told me a few weeks ago that you regretted not kissing me on your birthday. That you were 'young, stupid and naïve.' I accept your explanation, though I think it's weak, considering you were so important in my life."

"That was only half the truth," she admits, and sees a glimmer of surprise in his eyes.

"I have old habits of my own," she confesses. "My habit was to be guarded. Closed off. You say I was a pretty girl, but I was also self-protective, reserved and emotionally repressed. I held everyone at arm's length."

"I didn't feel that," Valentin gently challenges. "You were always friendly and very, very sweet." His voice trails off, and he blushes slightly.

Watching him, her lips soften into a hint of a smile.

"Didn't you wonder why I never went out with anyone," she probes. "Never dated?"

"Well, fraternization rules," he recalls.

"Psssh! People got around those rules whenever they wanted. Didn't you question why I didn't – not even once – have a romantic relationship while we were at the academy?"

He shakes his head.

"It's because I built a shell around myself. I never wanted a relationship – a physical relationship. Don't you see that I couldn't kiss you on my birthday, because I couldn't kiss anyone!"

He looks doubtful. "I don't remember a shell. You seemed completely open with me. Until …"

"It's because you were in the shell," she whispers. "But even so, I couldn't kiss you."

He shifts uncomfortably in his chair. "I, I'm sorry. I thought I was the only one, you know, damaged in that way. You could have told me." He searches her eyes. "Why didn't you, if we were such good friends as you say?"

"Because I thought I was abnormal! Pretty girls are supposed to be romantic, aren't they? The focus of men's affection – isn't that what everyone expects? But it was years before I was free to love, and be loved."

"When you were married to Robert?" he assumes.

"No, not even then. It was my sweet girl – Robin – who broke through to my heart."

His expression turns questioning.

"You remember I told you that Robin paid dearly for my mistakes. For years, she didn't even know I was her mother! I had to deny my own child! I longed for her little arms around my neck and to hear her call me, 'Mamma.'" She sighs. "Ultimately, it was Robin who taught me to love, and she opened my heart to receive love. Being able to claim her as my own was my greatest joy."

She exhales deeply. "I'll probably never be able to convince you that my not kissing you wasn't personal. But this much is true – you were my first dear friend, and my first great loss."

She holds his gaze without flinching. He looks away first, and she notices a slight glistening on his lashes.

He swipes across his eyes with the back of his hand.

"I suppose I have to believe you. After all, you're Anna Devane." Though his words seem bitter, his voice is gentle and he's smiling slightly.

When he looks away again, Anna worries that he doubts her.

"There is one thing," he finally says, still not meeting her eyes. "We need to give up this thing about the kiss."

She feels surprised, even a little disappointed, but she keeps her expression steady.

"I had a lot of time to think when I was away. I had to face everything I've done – the bad things, which are legion." He pauses, deep in thought. "And the good. One of the worst was badgering you about that kiss."

He looks her in the eye. "If any other man came to you and said he felt entitled to kiss you – for any reason – I'd kill him on the spot."

Anna nods. She has no doubt that he would.

"It haunts me that I treated you this way, someone I claim to care about."

"Don't say that." She places a hand on his forearm. "I'm not that cautious girl any longer, and your wanting to kiss me hardly comes a surprise. We were close, and …" She glances down. "Maybe we still are – or could be."

She impulsively stands.

"Are, are we done?" Valentin asks, appearing confused, but immediately rising as his manners dictate.

Anna looks at Andre.

"Let me give you a moment of privacy." The doctor reacts, quickly moving to the door. Before he closes it behind him, he dims the lights slightly.

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See Chapter Three

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If you love Anna and Valentin as much as I do, be sure to check out my other General Hospital-based story:

"Anna Devane and Valentin Cassadine – Anna's Birthday."

Thank you for reading!

Annette