6 AM on a Monday morning was always the worst time of the week for Miles. This morning specifically was worse than usual, because he was making his return to school after a week of being absent. His teachers were sure to give him shit – "I thought you'd changed, Mr. Hollingsworth. I thought you were finally becoming responsible," – but that certainly wasn't going to be the worst part. Tristan had always called them Degrassi's power couple and because of Tristan's increased popularity following his accident, everyone was sure to be aware of their breakup. Miles had convinced himself time and time again that he didn't care about what other people thought of him, but at this point, he could admit to himself that it was bullshit. He didn't know if he was going to be able to take the whisperings in the hallway and the pitied looks from his acquaintances.

On the other hand though, going to school today meant that he would get to see Lola.

It also meant seeing Zoe, who was waiting for him when he walked into first period History. She was sitting on top of his desk, sipping her latte with her legs crossed. It was a typical Zoe pose, one that said only one thing – "you're in trouble."

Although the two had become close over the past year or so, Miles was pretty certain that Zoe was going to be team Tristan. He wasn't sure why. By leaving, Tristan had abandoned her too. Somehow Miles was going to end up the bad guy in this situation. He could already hear Zoe in his ear with her "You pushed him away! You cheated! You were too cocky! This is all your fault!"

Those of course, weren't the exact words out of Zoe's mouth, but he could sense them. "You didn't answer my texts,"

"That's because I was ignoring them," The notifications he'd received from Zoe had all said pretty much the same thing. Questions about the break up, questions about Tristan, and then this morning, ones about whether or not he was coming to the airport to drop Tristan off.

"You really didn't want to come see Tristan off after all you've been through together?"

"Why would I? He broke up with me," he reminded her.

Tristan had invited him to both his going away party and to the airport as a "final goodbye." Miles hadn't seen the point of attending either of them. He didn't need any more reminders that such a big part of his life was over and that yet another person he loved was leaving him.

Zoe took a seat at the desk next to him. "I know, but . . . still. You still meant a lot to him, you couldn't do this one thing just for him?"

Don't get angry. Don't yell. You're not dad. "I waited by his bedside for three whole months. That was 'just for him' and it wasn't enough,"

"You're not allowed to use that excuse anymore," Zoe narrowed her eyes at him. "Because we both know where all that waiting led you,"

"I thought you said you weren't gonna use that against me,"

"I'm not using it against you. All I'm saying is, don't try and act like you were some perfect boyfriend because you weren't,"

"I know I wasn't, but I tried!" Perino looked up from his desk at Miles' loud tone and he quickly turned it down. "I tried so hard to make things work with him and it was never ever good enough. He held me to an impossible standard,"

"That's not true," said Zoe, but Miles could see in her eyes that she knew it was.

"Yes, it is and you know it. All he ever wanted was some hot piece of ass that he could control and show off to everyone," Miles was being far more aggressive then he wanted to be. He couldn't control it – he was finally releasing years of pent up anger and frustration.

"You sure think highly of yourself," Zoe scoffed.

"Yeah, well, I'm the only one,"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that no matter what I do, you and my dad and Frankie and Hunter and especially Tristan all make me look like a monster!"

"Quiet down, Hollingsworth, class has begun," said Perino the second the bell rang. It really was no use though, as the entire room had focused its attention on Miles and Zoe.

"Give me a second," he held up his hand in Perino's direction which earned a couple of gasps from the annoying goody two shoes side of the room. Zoe was looking at him with glassy eyes. It was a look that he recognized, one that she gave him when she knew something was very, very wrong. "All anybody ever does is tell me what I did wrong! What about Tristan, huh? What about him? Did you forget about him publicly shaming me in front of the whole school? Constantly telling me that my 'fluidity' isn't real? I guess you did, huh? Or maybe you didn't, because it's just easier to make the bisexual look like the bad guy,"

Miles stood up, pushing his desk a full few inches in front of him and grabbed his bag. "That was quite a show, but you've still got detention," Perino called after him. Miles was tempted to flip him off, but thought the better of it. He was in enough trouble as it was.

Instead of losing it even further, he found the nearest bathroom and shut himself in a stall, collapsing to the floor. He didn't know what had come over him or why he'd reached a boiling point so quickly. He thought he was better, he thought he was fine now. He wasn't supposed to act out like this anymore – he had responsibilities, people he was supposed to take care of. He wasn't just some stupid punk kid anymore . . . or maybe he was.

Maybe everything that Tristan and Zoe and his family said about him was true. Actually, no. It was all true. Time after time, Miles had tried to change and be better, but each time he'd failed miserably. Take just now, for example. Ever since what happened to Zoe at his party . . . happened . . . he'd promised himself he would never let anything happen to her ever again. And now here he was, screaming her head off in the middle of class. All he ever did was make things worse for everyone.

Like Lola.

Especially Lola.

Miles absentmindedly dug his fingers into his skin. You never deserved her, not even for a second, came the voice in the back of his head that sounded a hell of a lot like his dad. Just like you didn't deserve Maya or Zoe or Esme or Tristan.

And then the voice was replaced with Lola's, soft and sweet. You know, Miles, you're really nice. And sweet. And despite what everybody says, you're more than just a pretty face. His eyes opened at the memory. Yes, Lola had actually said those words to him one amazing day that they'd spent underneath a tree in the park.

Lola didn't think he was a screw up.

Key word was 'didn't' because she didn't then, but after everything had happened, she definitely did. But that's why he'd even come in today, wasn't it? To try and get her back? To try and show her that he was worthy of giving a second chance? Yes, it was. Lola was the one person who didn't completely hate him. She was the one person who thought that he was fine just being himself.

Next period he had a free period, so thankfully, he could spend it thinking some more. Well, doing that, and hiding from everyone who'd just seen him throw a hissy fit. The whole school probably knew about it by now. Stop caring about what other people think. It was really no use because doing that was practically impossible.

Between periods, he grabbed his jacket from his locker so that he could go for a walk and clear his head. Before he could even open it, Zoe appeared out of nowhere and grabbed his hand roughly. She began leading him down the hallway until they reached a bench and sat him down. Miles really wasn't in the mood to fight again. He told himself that no matter what Zoe said to him, he'd just listen and take it.

But the words she did say surprised him. "I'm sorry,"

His head practically jerked up. "What?"

"I'm sorry,"

"I'm the one who should be apologizing," he spat out quickly. "I yelled at you in front of everyone over nothing, I totally embarrassed you,"

She nodded. "Yeah, you did. But it wasn't exactly unwarranted."

He raised an eyebrow, confused.

"Maybe I should've been more understanding – I'm trying to be more understanding," she explained. It sounded like it was physically paining her to be nice to him, genuinely nice to him. Her eyes were squeezed shut and she was biting the inside of her mouth, looking like she was trying to force something out. Miles noticed this and shook his head.

"It's fine. We don't have to – "

"Your sexuality is real and valid," The sentence came our quickly, so fast that Miles had to pause and make sure that he'd heard her right. Zoe stared at him with intensity, praying that he wouldn't drag this out, that he understood what she meant.

Miles did understand. In her own way, Zoe was saying "You're right. Tristan didn't treat you right and I get why you were hurt. I didn't mean to attack you like that and I didn't mean to make you feel like it had anything to do with your sexuality. I'll stay in my lane next time." He got Zoe's message clearly. He smiled and squeezed her hand. For a split second, she squeezed his hand back and for that split second, it felt like they'd agreed on something bigger then just bisexuality being real. Something that felt a lot like friendship.

Being in a good place with Zoe gave Miles the confidence to wait by Lola's locker for her before lunch. The first step to getting her back into his life was just to talk to her first, wasn't it? They hadn't spoken since the night of the play (not counting their conversations in Miles's head).

He lit up the second he spotted Lola walking towards him. She looked like an angel, or some other kind of ethereal figure, walking down the hallway with a bounce in her step. The bouncing however, stopped when when she saw him standing there. She gave him a slight onceover and took a visible deep breath before approaching him.

"Hi, Miles," she said quietly, going to open her locker.

"Afternoon. You look nice today,"

Her cheeks turned pink and she looked down at her combination. It was very obvious that Lola was doing her best not to look at him, as if looking at him would spark some instant connection between them.

It wasn't in Miles's nature to give up so easily, though. Once Lola opened her locker, he grabbed her Math textbook from the top shelf and handed it to her. She gave him a thin-lipped smile and gathered the remainder of her things, wanting to get out of here as quickly as possible. "You want to eat lunch together today?"

It was this that broke Lola's demeanor. She chuckled an obvious fake laugh and turned to him. "So, that's it? Your boyfriend dumps you and suddenly you have time for me?"

"No," he shook his head. "I just – I miss you. I thought that you know, maybe you missed me too,"

"Why would you think that?" she closed her locker and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Because . . . we – we were friends,"

Lola fake laughed again. "Friends? Do you knock up all your friends?"

Miles blushed. He wasn't sure why, being discreet wasn't exactly his thing. "Okay, so were more than friends. A lot more. I realize that now and I . . . I want it back,"

Her lip quivered. "You really think I'm that pathetic? You really think that I'd take you back just like that, after everything? You wouldn't even be here if Tristan hadn't dumped you,"

"That's not true," he said, in the same voice Zoe had used earlier when she'd said the same thing.

"It is true. I love myself first and I'm not going to fall back into you just because you're . . ." she motioned up and down. " . . . tall and good looking and pretty . . ."

"You think I'm pretty?" he smirked.

"That's beside the point. The point is that I'm done being a second choice,"

Miles could feel himself losing control of the situation. His charm wasn't going to be able to pull him out of this one and that alone was enough to make him care ten times more. Lola being unwilling to go back to before just enhanced the feelings he already had for her, it proved how strong and independent she was. He reached forward and put his hand on her shoulder. "What can I do then, huh? What can I do to get back in your life?"

Lola stayed silent for a moment, pausing on his words. "Fight for me," she said and then turned away, walking down the hallway.

Author's Note: this is really bad but i'm tired so hello pls review