"Do you know how many international laws you are breaking? We're not just talking a small demeanour here, Kim! You could lose your job, your life, your achievements! They would take everything from you, expunge every good deed you have ever done! Everything that you have built up to this point thrown away just because..."
"Calm down, Wade," Kim replied tiredly as she sat in her study, with her clenched fist pressed against her forehead. She was dressed in her immaculately pressed blue Global Justice uniform, looking down at the paperwork on her desk, ignoring the livid African-American man on her computer terminal screen.
"Kim! You are not just harbouring a wanted felon, but this... There has got to be a kidnapping charge somewhere in here too!" Wade pleaded with reason. "You smuggled Shego back into the country, after drugging her up, and then kept her locked up in your apartment... Kim, have you gone insane?"
"First of all, Wade, she's not locked up in my apartment," Kim rebutted half-heartedly.
"Semantics, Kim!" Wade spluttered at her nonchalance. "She's effectively a prisoner in your apartment! How are you going to explain this to your boss?"
"Wade, I don't need to explain anything to Dr. Director if she doesn't find out about this, do I?" Kim's voice dropped a notch colder. "And secondly, Wade, do I need to remind you who was the one who helped me arrange transport back to Middleton? If I recall, that's aiding and abetting a felony."
Wade's face turned visibly pale. "Kim... You wouldn't..."
"Wade..." Kim looked up tiredly at the computer terminal, as she pressed her palms against her forehead. "You're my friend. I wouldn't rat you out. If anything happens, I'd just say I was acting alone. But I would expect a friend to do the same for me."
"Kim, I'm not thinking of myself here," Wade remarked, sounding slightly relieved. "It's just that... Why, Kim? Why?"
"Because..." Kim tried to find the words to explain. She finished half-heartedly, "It's what Ron would have wanted."
"C'mon, Kim, that's just bull," Wade called on her bluff. "If Ron was here, he would have said the exact same thing... He'd tell you that you're crazy and you have to keep your Kim-ness under wraps."
"But he's not here!" Kim snapped angrily at the mention of his name. "Ron's not here! He never will be! Instead, I have to put up with that beastly woman who is pregnant with his baby! What am I suppose to do, Wade? You want to say that it's not the right thing to do? Fine, it isn't! But then what about all the other 'right things' in my life? Like why isn't Ron here with me now? Why did Ron run away all those years back? Why did he have to die? You got the answers to that, Wade? Do you?"
Wade just looked at her silently. "I'm sorry, Kim," he finally spoke. "It's just that so many wrong choices were made, and I don't want to see you making another wrong choice..."
"Yeah, I know..." Kim muttered to herself. "I'm sorry too."
"Kim, I hate to see you like this," Wade sighed is dismay. "When you put your mind to something, you're so stubborn that you lose sight of your goals. I wish I could talk some sense into you, but I'm sorry I'm not Ron. I just hope you know what you're doing. See you later, Kim."
"Yeah. Later, Wade," Kim slumped back in her chair as she hit a button on the keyboard terminating the tele-conversation. She cast her eyes towards the corner of the screen which showed a grainy video feed from the bedroom next door.
Her green eyes focused on the sleeping woman, huddled under the sheets in a foetal position. Although she was sleeping, the woman struggled in her dreams, clutching her pillow tightly and occasionally thrashing in her sleep. Resolutely, Kim got to her feet and stepped out of her study. Without knocking on the door, she twisted the door handle to the guest bedroom and almost violently kicked against the door. She reached for the light switch and flicked it on.
Immediately, the sleeping figure groaned as the bright light strained her eyes. "Wake up, Shego," Kim growled at the woman. "We got to talk."
The raven-haired woman struggled to prop herself up on her elbows groggily, as she looked around her surroundings. She casted a quick glance around the room before rubbing her tired eyes again. "Where the fuck am I, Princess?" she asked grouchily.
"You're in my apartment," Kim replied bluntly. "Back in Middleton."
That seemed to have gotten the woman's attention as she pushed herself back with her arms and leaned against the headboard. "How the hell did I get here?" Shego asked in a wheezing voice, as she struggled to breathe. The muscle atrophy from her three-year lack of physical activity was taking a toll on her.
"I drugged you and brought you back into the country," Kim replied emotionlessly.
"Heh," Shego cracked a smile. "Now that sounds exactly like something I would do."
When Kim didn't reply, Shego's face turned serious and asked, "Why?"
"Because..." Kim crossed her arms as she glared at the woman. Without saying a word, she picked up a stack of papers lying on the dresser next to the door and flung it at the woman. The papers flew in a flutter before landing on the duvet covering Shego's legs.
"What the fuck is this?" Shego groaned as she blinked hard, reaching out to grab the papers. As her eyes focused on the words, she realised what it was. "What bullshit is this?" Shego yelled out, despite her weak lungs. "Adoption papers? What the fuck for?"
"For Ron's baby," Kim replied stoically as she walked over next to the bed. Reaching into her shirt pocket, she pulled out a pen and offered it to the woman. "You are going to stay under my care until the baby is due. And after that, I will be taking over full custody of Ron's baby. After that, I don't care what happens to you, you can crawl back to whatever hole you came from, but I will be that baby's mother, not you."
"No fucking way!" Shego snapped as she slapped the offending instrument out of the red-head's hand. The pen went flying, skittering into an unknown corner.
"Maybe you don't quite understand me," Kim explained herself coldly. "You are an internationally wanted criminal. All I have to do is make a call, and there will be no less than sixteen international enforcement agencies at my doorstep in fifteen minutes wanting a piece of you. You will be put in a hole so deep that you would never see the sun for the next forty-five years."
"Then why don't you just do it?" Shego snapped back.
"Because you're carrying Ron's baby," Kim replied calmly as she bent over to pick up the pen. "I won't allow his child to be born in the worst prisons on this planet, and the least you can do, if you have even one shred of humanity left if you, you would do what is best for his child."
Shego gave a cold laugh, as she placed one hand over her belly. "So this is what this is all about, isn't it? You want my baby? Why? Is it because it's Ron's and my baby? You're jealous, aren't you? You're jealous that I'm the one preg..."
Kim raised her hand and felt a rush of anger through her veins. She wanted to strike her across her sneering face and leave a red welt across her pale pasty skin. However, the blow never came. Shaking with anger, the red-head slowly lowered her hand before walking out the door without saying a word. As her fist gripped the door handle, she swung with all her might and slammed the door behind her.
Suddenly, her entire body felt weak, as Kim slumped against the wall. She clutched her face as the tears started streaming down her cheeks again. Slowly, she slid to the floor as she started sobbing in anguish as Shego's words echoed in her mind. It was like all those ghosts from all those lonely nights have come back, and Shego's voice haunting her, all too real this time, accusing her all over again and again...
Shego never saw much of her captor for the rest of the day after riling her up like that. Although she was grateful for the peace and quiet, she realised that other than a carafe of water and glass on the bedside table, she was feeling rather hungry. She'd thought about somehow crawling to the kitchen to find some food, but she had no assurance that the door was lock or not. Maybe Kim was trying to starve her until she caved and signed those papers. Or maybe she just wanted to see Shego crawl, dragging her useless legs behind her, while she stands victorious and triumphant over her.
Even after all these years, she still held on to her stubborn pride. She had long shredded the adoption papers with her thin bony fingers while waiting for time to pass. There was only so much time she could spend sleeping, and tearing up the papers gave her a strange sense of empowerment as she scored another victory over her long-ago arch-rival, no matter how hollow it was.
As she wondered what to do next, the door to her bedroom swung open, and her captor walked in bearing a tray of food. Shego had to give her credit; the woman seemed unfazzled by the shreds of paper lying on the bedroom floor. The red-head simply placed the tray on the bedside table and then, without a word, walked out of the room. For a moment, Shego glanced suspiciously at the food wondering if Kim would drug her again like a few days before and then transporting her to a maximum-security prison. Or maybe this time, she'd just drug her straight, put her in a pliable state of mind and make her sign over her baby. Or maybe, even worse, it was rat poison...
Shego shook her head at her paranoia. There's no way that woman would hurt Ron's baby. Her baby. If Kim wanted her dead, she'd have been reunited with Ron a long time ago in the afterlife. Even Kim wouldn't give her that satisfaction. Kim wanted her baby, there was no reason she'd even risk hurting it.
She picked up a bowl of steaming oatmeal from the tray and gently stirred it while blowing over the bowl. It had been the first decent meal she remembered for a while, and each mouthful of oatmeal was like a small morsel of warmth that emanated from insider her and warmed her trembling fingers. She finished the bowl quickly, before replacing it back on the tray and picking up the red apple next to the bowl. Taking a bite into the crunchy flesh of the apple, she sighed as she savoured the sweetness.
After she finished her apple, she found herself licking the core as she tried to savour every bit of sweetness in her mouth. Chucking the core aside, she licked her fingers, before settling back into bed with a contented look on her face. Somehow, the irony struck her, her arch-nemesis was actually serving her breakfast in bed. As she smiled stupidly at the thought, she was interrupted again by the opening of her bedroom door. Kim entered the room again, this time holding a small cup filled with brightly coloured pills. Again, silently, she handed the cup to Shego.
Unsure, Shego slowly raised her hand to take the cup from her and glance suspiciously at the pills. "What is it?"
"Vitamins," Kim replied curtly. "You are malnourished."
"Are you sure?" Shego studied Kim's face, looking for some kind of hint on her stone-cold face.
"Swallow it," Kim replied exasperatedly. "Don't make me bring in an IV bag."
Without a word, Shego popped the pills into her mouth and gulped it down with a mouthful of water. Feeling like a child, Shego opened her mouth and stuck out her tongue impudently. "There, I swallowed my pills," Shego remarked mockingly. "Want to give me my enema next?"
Without so much as a change in expression, Kim picked up the tray and walked out of the room.
"Wait..." Shego suddenly called out to her.
Stopping at the doorway, Kim turned and looked at her. "What do you want?"
"I..." Shego suddenly felt meek. "Look, I've been in bed for over 24 hours... I think... And unless you want to change my soiled sheets..."
Kim paused for a moment, before she set the tray down on the floor next to the door. She walked up next to the bed again, before pulling the sheets of Shego. Without so much as a word, she lifted the woman in her arms. Shego was caught by surprised as the red-head carried her towards the toilet. She knew that she'd lost some weight, but Kim's arms were quite strong. Embarrassed, she clutched her arms around Kim's neck, wondering why she felt nervous suddenly. Kim helped her into the guest bathroom, and gently left her on the toilet before walking out. Calling over her shoulder, the red-head said, "Holler when you're done."
"Okay..." Shego suddenly felt ashamed of herself and her useless legs. She realised how helpless she was without Kim, and the way she'd treated her earlier. All Kim wanted was her baby, and she somehow knew deep in her heart that her arch-rival would be a better mother than she would ever be.
"Why do you keep doing that?" Shego suddenly asked a few days later.
Silently, Kim knelt down and slowly picked up the shreds of the eighth set of adoption papers which Shego had torn up. Holding the torn pieces in her hand, she just gave Shego a blank look, before letting the pieces of paper fall into a wastepaper basket in the corner of the guess bedroom. "You know why," Kim replied, coldly and calculatingly.
"You won't believe me, but I loved him too, you know." Shego gazed down at her still flat belly and gently laid her hand on it.
Kim just rolled her eyes and walked towards the door.
"Is it that hard to believe that I can love someone like Ron?"
"For all the things I've seen you do," Kim found herself saying bitterly, as the mention of his name stirred something in her. "I don't believe someone as vile and repulsive as you is capable of any emotion like love. You never had any friends; everyone was just a tool to you, a means to get what you want. You are nothing more than a heartless thief, and everyone around you was just a means to your goal. You've lied, cheat and stole your way through life, and that's how you've always lived. So forgive me if I'm prejudiced, but you've had your fair share of chances for love already. You didn't need to take mine."
"Ron was my friend too," Shego mumbled softly.
"And look how you treated him?" Kim felt the anger rising in her voice. Struggling to contain her emotions, she clenched her fists and inhaled deeply. "You drove him to his death!"
"That's not fair..."
"Really, now?" Kim taunted her. "What about what's fair to Ron? Did he deserve to die?"
"I didn't mean to!" Shego choked out. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry that he died and I know it's my fault! And I'd do anything to have him back!"
"Guess what, bitch. Your actions speak louder than your words."
"You know what, Kim?" Shego retorted with indignation. "I don't care if you believe me or not. I loved Ron, and I won't give his baby up for adoption! So you can either call the authorities on me, declare me criminally insane or even put me in a chemically-induced coma, I don't care. But I am going to fight until my last dying breath to keep our baby. Yes, Kim, our baby. Ron's and mine."
"And if you have any love for that baby, you would give it up for adoption without hesitation," Kim struck finally. She'd worn her opponent down enough with the silent treatment and the endless stacks of adoption papers she had prepared in her office. "You are in no shape to bring up any child on your own. Give him to me."
"Why?" Shego cried. "I can be a mother too!"
"How, Shego?" Kim sneered cruelly. She wanted to hurt the woman. Just to hurt her. Just hurt. "How can a cripple like you be a mother? You can't even change your own diapers, much less that of a baby. You're worthless, useless, and if not for me bringing you back from that godforsaken island, you'd be lying in a cesspool of your own shit and piss. Face it, Shego, maybe the best thing you could do for your baby, if you're not too selfish to think about someone else for the first time, would be kill yourself after your baby is born. Because, god knows, you don't deserve to be a mother, and no child deserves a monster like you as a mother."
Kim knew her words hit home, when Shego's eyes started water. She felt a sense of victory over her fallen opponent. After all those years of taunting and mockery, Shego's tough facade finally cracked. This was payback for all three years of suffering that she has caused. Drunk on her triumph, Kim pressed on, "Face it, Shego. Even you know it yourself. In your deepest darkest nightmares, you'd be abandoned by everyone around you. Team Go, Drakken, Ron, and even your own child, especially when she finds out that you are the cause for the death of her father. At least spare your child from the cruelty of knowing you."
"That's not fair, Kim..." Shego's voice was caught in a hitch.
"Shego, I'm the best chance that baby has of living a normal life," Kim homed in for the kill. "I can erase all the medical records, and I can make sure that there's nothing to relate her back to you. It'll be just like you never existed, and that is for the best. She will live a normal life, not knowing who her actual mother was."
Shego blinked her eyes as tears welled up. "No..." she bit her lip as she fought back the urge to cry. "It can't be... I can change... I can be a good mother..."Kim just stood there, unmoving with her arms firmly crossed over her chest. "I want to be a good mother," she mournfully whispered to herself.
"Why is this so important to you?" Kim asked, caught by surprise by her tenacity. "It's not like you've ever cared for anyone else in your life."
"You're wrong, Kim..." Shego sniffed as she wiped her nose with the back of her hand. "I can be a good mother... I can try... I can change..."
"Forget it, Shego, I'm not buying it," Kim replied with a steely voice.
"Maybe it's you who doesn't understand!" Shego cried out. "Maybe that's why you don't know. Did Ron ever tell you why he left you?"
Kim froze for a moment as her vision turned red. "It was because of you..." she tried to say as calmly as she could.
"No, Kim... It's because of you..." Shego replied reproachfully. "He was always in love with you. You should know that. His feelings have never changed. Not even while I was with him. Even when I tried to make him forget about you..."
"Ah hah!" Kim gloated triumphantly as she stabbed her finger dangerously close to Shego's face. "I knew it! You seduced him. You seduced and fucked my Ron! That baby should have been mine!"
Shego gave her a strange sad look. "I don't care what you think, Princess..."
"And why should you anyway?" Kim interrupted her. "Why should you care? You killed him! You killed the only man I loved!"
"Has Ron ever talked to you about me?" Shego asked, before shaking her head as she corrected herself. "Of course he hasn't. That's why you went ballistic like you did." She lifted up the hem of her dress shirt, revealing her pale abdomen, framed by her ribs that poked through her skin like ridges. Twisting painfully to the side, she showed Kim the jagged scars that stretched across her lower back.
"This is why I can't walk. And why I am a cripple. And why I can't be a good mother, like you said." There was no bitterness or despair in her voice, just a calm serene statement that almost seemed chilling. "I'd died already, Kim. Thanks to you. You killed me that day..."
"Well, apparently I didn't kill you enough," Kim gritted her teeth as she turned her head away from the glaring shadow of a wound on her body. "And if you weren't pregnant with Ron's baby, I'd gladly kill you again and again until you stayed dead."
"And that's what kept Ron away from you!" Shego raised her voice hotly. "You never learn, do you? You'd do anything, anything! Just to have things your way! That's your problem, Kim, you always thought you were right, that's why it never occurred to you that it was your fault to begin with."
"Shut up! Shut up, shut up, shut up! You don't know the first thing about me!" Kim screamed back. Her control over the situation, the woman, had slipped away minutes ago and the realisation had just struck her. Shego was always good at this, irritating her, annoying her, getting under her skin and provoking her. That's always been her modus operandi. She needed to retreat, pull back for a moment and regroup for a renewed assault on the woman. This wasn't the plan... She needed to get under the woman's skin instead of the other way around. Kim turned away from her, trying to maintain her facade. She needed to get out of here. She needed...
"You're right, Kim," Shego spoke to her turned back. "I don't know the first thing about you. But Ron does." As the woman stood there unflinching, Shego asked, "Don't you want to know what was Ron thinking?"
She could see the red-head's back stiffened for a moment. Then wordlessly, she walked out of her bedroom and shut the door behind her as calmly as she could. Numbly, Kim stumbled back to her home office, before her shaking knees almost gave way. She steadied herself against her office desk, trying to catch her breath as she fought against the raging tide of fury and despair growing inside her. In frustration, she finally screamed, as her fingers clenched tightly at the edge of the table. She leaned over and swept every single piece of paper and every file off the table in a violent fit, before reaching over and picking up her laptop and flung it with all her might against the opposite wall. And when her fingers found nothing more she could fling, smash or destroy, she raised her hands to her face and cried...
Author's Notes
The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog. Also, but lesser known. Jaded zombies acted quietly but kept driving their oxen forward.
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