Guilt
Miranda sat in her office, staring out the window deep in thought. She didn't know what was wrong with her. She hardly has ever let her emotions get in the way of her decisions and lately she'd been falling apart. First with her sister in danger, then Nicket betraying her, thankfully Shepard had been there to stop her from shooting him.
And there was Jack.
Most distracting creature she had ever met.
Shepard had come by often to try to discuss the fight that had happened between Jack and her. Miranda would shut her down quickly. She sighed thinking of the commander and leaned her head further back on the couch. She wasn't really mad at her. She was just embarrassed about her own behavior so pretending to feel betrayed seemed the most logical. She also wasn't sure if she would be able to hide the truth from Shepard.
That she cared for Jack.
Miranda had tried several times to go down and apologize to Jack but she would find herself at the top of the stairs looking blankly down. What could she say? And what if Jack only rejected her like she did her? She would usually end up pacing around like a fool before huffing and storming back to the elevator. Surely Tali was beginning to find it strange that Miranda needed "walks" so often around the engineering floor. However, the Quarian found it easier to not ask too many questions about human relationships.
Miranda leaned her head forward into her palms. She was such a coward. What she said was awful and there was no way to take it back. She couldn't take looking at Jacks hurt eyes again.
She had seen the hurt.
It killed Miranda.
It killed her that she caused it. She didn't think, she just reacted to Jacks rage. All because she couldn't admit that Cerberus was wrong, that she was wrong. She was such a prideful idiot some days.
Miranda looked longingly over at a desk drawer that offered a night of forget. She checked the time deciding that no one would likely come by at this hour. She felt enough guilt for one day, tonight she would forget with the help of an old friend.